Dibbler:    Oh I come from a city

From a very dirty city

Where the thieves and assassins roam

Where some think it is fun /Where it's flat and immense

To pie you in the face /And the smell is intense

It's corrupted, but hey--it's home!

When the wind's at your back

And the sun's never seen

And the wizards always think they're right

Come on down,

Stop on by

Hop a broomstick and fly

To another Ankh-Morporkian night!

Ankh-Morporkian nights

Like Ankh-Morporkian days

More often than not

Are smellier than sh*t

In a lot of good ways

Ankh-Morporkian nights

'Neath Ankh-Morporkian moons

A man off his guard

Could be inhumed and robbed

Out there on the streets.

Ah, hello and good evening to you worthy friend.

Please, please, come closer--(Camera zooms in hitting

Dibbler in face) Too close, a little too close.  (Camera

zooms back out)There.

Welcome to Ankh-Morpork.  City of magnitude, of rejection,

and the finest merchandise this side of the river Ankh, on

sale today, come on down!

Heh, heh.  Look at this! Yes!  Combination Bohkah and

skrumble maker--also makes Klatchian fries.  Will not break

(taps it on table), will not--(it falls apart)--it

broke.  Ooohhh!  Look at this! (Pulls out Tupperware) I

have never seen one of these intact before.  This is the

famous XXXX Tupperware. Listen.  (Pries it open,

makes raspberry sound.)  Ah, still good. (Camera begins

to pan to right.  Dibbler hurries to catch it.)  Wait,

don't go!  (Stop pan.) I can see that you're only

interested in the exceptionally rare.  I think then, you

would be most rewarded to consider...this.  (Dibbler

pulls a sausage inna bun out from his sleeve.) Do not be

fooled by its commonplace appearance.  Like so many

things, it is not what is outside, but what is inside

that counts.  (Another pan, this one slower to left.

Again, Dibbler rushes to catch up.)  This is no ordinary

Sausage-inna-bun!  It once changed the course of a young pig's life.

A young pig who liked this sausage-inna-bun was more than what he

seemed.  Full of meat.