Title: You're What I Need
Rating: PG
Author: Mac (col_sarah_mackenzie@yahoo.com)
Disclaimer: The characters of JAG are property of Donald P. Bellisario
and other people who aren't me.
Spoilers: Full Engagement
Notes: I don't think Mac knew Chloe during "Full Engagement", but she does in this fic.
************

I stared at the television set, not really watching it. The past few
weeks of my recovery have been slow going. My leg still hurts despite
the pain medication I received from the doctor.

I haven't been sleeping very well either. The nightmares come and I'm
up at 0300. The look on his face after I stabbed him flashes in front
of me. I know I was protecting myself, but I still can't get that look
out of my head.

He had it coming, right?

Harm agreed. The bastard had it coming, but does that still make it
right?

I should really get to bed. I'm going back to work this morning. I'll
see how it goes. Maybe if I focus my mind on something else... Yeah,
I'll think of Harm and the way he protected me. The good aspects of
that trip to the mountains.

I laugh bitterly. I'll be up in again in 10 minutes.

**********

The ringing of the phone jarred me awake. I glanced over at the clock.
Wow, I slept for a good 3 hours and 5 seconds. With a sigh, I picked
up the cordless. "Major Mackenzie."

"Hey, Mac!"

I smiled. It was Chloe. "Hey! You do know that it's 0600, don't
you?"

"Yeah," Chloe replied, "and you're usually up by now. Are you feeling
okay? Is your leg still bothering you?"

I sat up, feeling a slight twinge of pain. "Not too much. How are
things on your end?"

"Boring. Can I come over this weekend?"

"You ask that like you live down the street," I said with a laugh.
"I'll give your Dad a call later today and clear it with him first."

"Awesome! Well, I'll let you get ready for work. Tell that handsome
Commander I said hey."

"Will do, Chloe." She started giggling. "What's so funny?"

"I knew it! You think Harm's handsome."

I rolled my eyes. "I'd have to be dead not too!"

"Mac and Harm, sitting in a tree--"

"I'm hanging up now!"

************

I had just sat down at my desk and was getting ready to work on a
deposition, when there was a knock at the door. I looked up to see
Harm.

"Morning, Ninja Girl. How are you doing?"

"Much better," I said, lying through my teeth.

Harm just stared at me, knowing full well not to say anything. "The
Admiral wants to see you in his office." I nod, getting up from my
seat. "Mac, if you need to talk, you know where to find me."

"Harm, I'm fine."

"I know," he said, with a smile. "I'm just letting you know that my
door is always open."

I smiled back. "Thank you."

***********

"Major Mackenzie reporting as ordered, Sir!" I wince slightly as
stand at attention. I guess the Admiral noticed it because he told me
to have a seat.

"Welcome back, Major."

"It's good to be back, Admiral."

The Admiral nodded and glanced down at the paperwork on his desk. "Are
you ready to tackle a case?"

"I believe so, Sir," I answered. He looked up at me. If he looked
close enough, he could probably see the dark circles under my eyes. "I
am ready, Admiral."

He smiled. "No doubt, Major," he said, handing me a folder. "A
Petty Officer charged with dereliction of duty. I'd give you something
more challenging, but there isn't anything at the moment. Commander
Rabb is waiting on the verdict for the only court martial we've had in
a few weeks."

The Admiral waited a few minutes before saying more. "Mac, are you all
right? You don't look as though you've been sleeping well."

"I'm fine, Sir," I replied. "Will that be all?"

"Yes, Major." I stood up. "Dismissed."

"Aye, Aye, Sir!"

*************

This was a rather long day. I tried concentrating on my deposition,
but I was having little luck. I finally decided to give up and was
getting ready to head home when Harm stopped me. "Mac, are busy
tonight?"

"No, why?" I asked.

"I was thinking about picking up a pizza and a few movies. You
interested?"

I smiled. "That sounds like a great idea, Harm. My apartment or
yours?"

"Yours, of course," Harm replied. "I'll be over around 1930 hours?"

I smiled again, looking at his blue eyes shining. This man could be the
answer to my dreams. He's smart, handsome, and knows exactly how to
cheer me up. I love him-- Whoa, what am I thinking? This is Harm!

"Mac, Earth to Mac!"

I snap out of my thoughts to see a hand waving in front of my face.
"Oh, right, 1930!"

**********

I had just changed into a pair of sweatpants and t-shirt, when there
was a knock at the door. I opened it to find Harm standing there,
holding a pizza and two movies.

"Hey, come on in." I led him to the coffee table in front of the
television. "I'll just grab the paper plates and drinks. What would
like? I've got iced tea, water, juice..."

"Iced tea is fine, thanks."

I carried everything into the living room and set it down on the table,
glancing down at the videos. 'A Few Good Men' and 'Return To Me'.
"Interesting choices, Harm."

"Well, I thought I'd pick one you liked and one I liked."

"Lets play your favorite first," I replied, picking up 'Return To Me'.

"Remember, you tell anyone and I'll hurt you."

I smiled. "Yeah, you and what army?"

20 minutes later, I was feeling really tired. I guess it was a
combination of the lack of sleep, the food, and the smell of Harm's
cologne. Whatever it was, I felt my head fall to his chest, the
beating of his heart relaxing me.

**********

I woke up in confusion. Where was I? I felt strong arms around me and
realized it was Harm. Oh God, what happened? I jumped up immediately
from the couch, visions of that guy from the mountains in my head
again.

"Mac?" Harm asked. "Are you all right?"

I looked down at my hands to see them shaking. "No!" I exclaimed.
"No, I'm not all right!"

Harm rushed over to me as my knees gave out and I began falling to
floor. He caught me and lowered me the rest of the way. The anger,
the pain, the frustration all flowed out of my eyes.

I could hear Harm whispering soothing words in my ears. "I won't let
anything happen to you," he said. "I didn't then and I won't now, I
promise."

"I-I'm sorry..." I look up at him. "I'm such a mess."

"It's all right, Mac. I'll always be there for you."

I nod. "Harm... I..."

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

The smile on Harm's face was almost enough to cheer me up. "You do?"
I nodded. His lips descended onto mine. When we broke apart, he
said, "I love you too, Sarah."

"When did you first know?" I asked.

"In a rose garden."

I hugged him close. "Just like me. You're all I need, Harmon Rabb."