THE RUGGED INTERIOR BENEATH THE SOPHISTICATION: David's "FUN" Evening
David and Maddie made a deal...a FINE evening for a FUN evening...well, David made good on his end...or tried anyway...now it's Maddie's turn.
It's 9AM the morning after the fight with the Russian boxer and David shows up to work with a spring in his step and a few cuts and bruises on his face.
David: Morning Ms. Dipesto.
Ms. Dipesto: Morning Mr. Addison.
David glides towards Maddie's office and slips into the door.
Maddie looks up from crunching numbers on the calculator.
Maddie: (Pained.) Oh, David…you look awful.
David: Don't worry Maddie, the bone structure is still intact, these are just a couple of flesh wounds…I'll be as good lookin' as ever by next week.
Maddie moves into her executive washroom to get David a cold towel for his face, she approaches him with it and holds it gently on his eye being very caring.
David: Thank you, nurse, …now can you give me a sponge bath, there are some other sensitive areas that need tending to...
Maddie makes a disgusted face and presses the towel into his wound so it hurts.
David takes over holding the towel to his face and Maddie walks back and sits behind her desk.
Maddie: I'm trying to make you feel better and all you do is make crude jokes.
There's a pause.
David: So, when do I get my evening?
Maddie: Your evening?
David: Fun? Remember? We had a deal Maddie...
Maddie: I thought you had your fun hanging off the balcony of the theater the other night..
David: You can't let that go...? I've apologized Maddie. And it wasn't no fun getting punched in the face by a Russian boxer either...you owe me.
Maddie: Right…well, we're 2 and 0, so I think we'd better quit while we're ahead.
David: You call this ahead?
Maddie: Behind, whatever…
David: Speaking of behind…
he glances over at hers. She throws him a look…
Maddie: Point is, obviously, you and I going out together doesn't work so…
David: Third times a charm. (Grins.)
David moves to sit on the corner of Maddie's desk.
David: Come on Maddie, I know you've got it in you…a traveling circus? Skydiving? A sweet little tour of the city by night (reconsiders.) or just a night in a suite…
Maddie rolls her eyes.
David: Anything goes…what will you plan? Where will you take me? Inquiring minds want to know.
Maddie: So, you're still going to make me do this?
David: Fairs fair.
Maddie: (sighs deeply.) Fine...
David puts his face close to Maddie's...
David: Not fine...fun.
David takes her hand…
David: And remember that suite if you really want to make me feel better…
Maddie: (She warns.) Watch it, Addison…
David: (Pivots.) O….K. (David gets up, paces and rubs his hands together) Wooo-weee, can't wait. What time?
David: (Shocked) 6? ...6!? What kinda fun happens at 6?
Maddie: Well, I don't want to be up all night David...
David: (Overlapping, starts walking out) Alright, forget it. I knew you couldn't do this...
Maddie gets up and moves toward him.
Maddie: Wait...wait...ok, wait...I can do this. I'll prove to you I know how to have fun.
David: Yeah? You've told me that from the day we met and I still haven't seen it.
Maddie: 9...I'll pick you up at 9.
David: Ok...(looks at her..) still an early start...
Maddie: (Overlaps.) What...
David: (Concedes) But I'll take it. I'll take it. (A bit flirty) See you at 9.
Maddie: (Flirts back as she moves past him) See you then.
CUT TO: Maddie leaves the office early to plan David's fun evening...although she really doesn't know where to start. She knows what kind of fun David Addison has, but shooting boilermakers from some bimbos bosom and ending up passed out on the floor of a strip club are obviously out of the question...so, what else could she do that would satisfy his unrefined tastes?
Maddie snaps her fingers...cars. Men love cars. Before she took over Blue Moon David had two Porches as company cars. She would rent a fancy sports car for the evening...(she shrugs) it's a start…
After the third sports shop, Maddie is beginning to see that planning a big date the day of is actually pretty difficult. It's Friday and all the nice cars are rented for the weekend...all they have left are little tini-mobiles, and she knows David wouldn't be caught dead in one of those. She's just about given up when a guy around the corner from the last shop snaps his fingers to get her attention. She looks over and he flashes her a picture of a brand new Porsche.
Man: You interested?
Maddie is suspicious but desperate.
Maddie: No...no thank you.
Man: I'll rent it to you for a good price. You can keep it for the weekend.
Maddie: (looks around) I don't know.
Man: Come on. It's a lot of fun to drive. You got a boyfriend? He'll love driving around in it.
Maddie is tempted...it is a beautiful car...David would be impressed.
Maddie: It's not stolen is it?
Man: Do I look like a crook lady? My mother would be so insulted.
Maddie: Not stolen huh? (looks around.) Ok, Well, where is it?
Man: If you want it, I can have it here in 10 minutes.
Maddie: How much?
Man: $200 for the weekend, I'll meet you back here Sunday night to get it back. Nice and easy.
Maddie doesn't have any other ideas and it's getting late.
Maddie: Ok, fine. Get it here. I'll take it.
30 mins later Maddie pays the guy and is on her way in the Porsche. It drives like a dream.
CUT TO: David heads home from the office just after 6pm. He's filled with an air of excitement because Maddie Hayes is planning a fun evening out and he can't wait to see where this goes. He heads home, takes a quick cat nap, showers and changes into black jeans, a black t-shirt, his leather jacket and white high top shoes. He applies a light cologne and just as he finishes slicking his hair straight back he hears honking outside. Could that be Maddie?
CUT TO: Maddie dresses in an outfit that is more casual than what she usually wears: Shoes with a low heel, dark denim jeans, and a shoulder-padded sweater, she figures the blousy pant outfits she usually wears aren't really going to fit in, in David's world. She does her hair in very loose curls with one side up in a clip. She heads over to David's at about 20 minutes to nine thinking she's got the perfect fun evening planned for him; just before nine she pulls up in front of his building and blows the horn. When David comes out she is taken aback, he looks so extremely handsome...it wasn't often she sees him looking so casual but put together, cuts, bruises and all...the man looks sexy, she actually starts to feel a little nervous as he climbs in the car.
CUT TO: David walks out of his apartment building to see if it's Maddie disturbing the peace in the neighborhood...he looks down to the street and sees an absolutely beautiful Porsche parked out front...
David: (To himself) No she didn't...(impressed, calls out.) all right Maddie! His excitement soars and he trots down the stairs, rounds the corner and struts towards the car and as he catches a glimpse at how absolutely gorgeous Maddie looks sitting behind the wheel, his smile grows...he climbs in.
David: (Applauds) All right Maddie...very nice start.
Maddie: (Flirty smile) You like it?
David: I love it...and to think I doubted you...(he slips on sunglasses.)
Maddie: Oh, hang on mister...this is just the beginning...Maddie puts the pedal to the metal and speeds off down the street...David feels like he's died and gone to heaven.
CUT TO: Maddie drives them down the coast for about an hour and they take in a breathtaking view of the Pacific Ocean at sunset. Eventually, she pulls into the parking lot of a restaurant that overlooks the sea. At the restaurant, they put newspaper down on a picnic table and dump buckets of potatoes, corn, lobster, crawfish, and ribs onto the table and everyone just digs in.
David: This is my kinda place...don't even need utensils...
Maddie: You didn't think I'd take you to a place with white tablecloths, did you?
David: (Takes in the view and the setting) I gotta admit it, Maddie, so far you're hitting it out of the park...
Maddie: (Smiles and looks out at the ocean) See? I'm not as boring as you think I am Addison...
David: ...Boring...? Did I say that...?
Maddie: I'm sure it's crossed your mind.
David: Oh, trust me. When you're in my mind I find it very exciting.
Maddie smiles shyly and looks down.
Maddie: You're the king of quick wit Addison...
David: That's me! (Grins). So, what's next?
David: Next. This has all been great, so far, but a drive down the coast and corn on the cob do not a fun evening make.
Maddie: Oh, I've got other plans. Just you wait and see.
David and Maddie smile and smolder a bit and spend another hour just chatting and enjoying the beautiful evening ocean view. Sometime after 11pm David gets behind the wheel and drives them back downtown, she directs him to pull up in front of a club called Scene.
David: Whadda we doin' here?
Maddie: Going in.
David: To Scene?
David: I know you don't get out much Maddie...but this isn't the kind of place you just walk into. There's about a 6-month wait.
Maddie: (David won't get so Maddie walks around the car and takes the ticket from Valet.) Oh yeah?
David: (Looks like she's nuts) Yeah.
Maddie: Well, let me see what I can do…
Maddie walks off; David gets out of the car and follows her reluctantly and looks a little embarrassed as they approach the doorman.
Doorman: Name, please?
Maddie: Madolyn Hayes.
The doorman looks at his list and puts his hand up for them to wait. He steps away and whispers in the ear of a bigger guy who is eyeing David up and down and then speaks into his walkie- talkie.
David whispers in Maddie's ear...
David: We're never getting in here...and you don't want to piss these guys off, trust me...one of 'em already looks like he wants to use me as a hand weight.
The bigger guy comes over and moves Maddie and David into a separate roped off area.
David: (Puts his hands up.) Hey hey hey - what is this? Dance club jail? Just let us walk away and we won't cause any trouble...(he nudges Maddie, whispers in her ear) look, there's a regular old billiards club right over there...let's just go shoot a couple games and I'll call it an even bet.
A well-dressed man comes out of the club and approaches Maddie, they embrace in a big hug.
Randy: How many years has it been?
Maddie: Too many...at least, what, 3? The last time I saw you was on that cruise I took right before I came back to poverty.
Randy: Ah, right...that was a fun time...I forgot we ran into each other on that cruise. How are you doing Maddie? You know if you ever need anything...
Maddie: ...No, no, I'm fine Randy! Thank you though.
Randy: Well, I'm glad you at least...finally took me up on my offer to visit one of my clubs.
Maddie: (Smiles) Yes, oh...(takes David's elbow and moves him forward) Randy, this is my business associate, David.
David sticks out his hand to shake Randy's.
Randy: David, welcome...any friend of Maddie's is a friend of mine.
Maddie: I promised David a good time...and I thought...no one has a better time than Randy Barron...so, I figured why not reach out.
Randy: Well, I'm glad you did. Right this way Maddie...David.
Maddie and David are led into the club through a sea of people.
David walks close to Maddie and talks in her ear...
David: So, you've sailed the 7 seas with ole Randy here? Huh? How come you've never mentioned him...
Maddie: Is that what you assume?
David: That you know the motion of the ocean with this guy? Yeah.
Maddie stomps on David's toe and moves faster to catch up to Randy who makes small talk about her business. They are escorted to a roped off area which is stocked with champagne, liquor, and snacks. David and Maddie slide into the curved booth with a perfect view of the dance floor and settle in.
Randy: Maddie, David...enjoy yourselves. And if there is anything else I can get you please do not hesitate to ask.
He takes Maddie's hand, kisses it and walks away.
David: Gotta admit Maddie...pretty smooth...pretty swanky...pretty...
Maddie: (interrupts) ...Fun?
David: ...So, this is how Maddie Hayes gets down, huh?
Maddie: (smolders)...I've been in known to pull an all-nighter here and there...
David: (Smiles, smolders and pours champagne) Well, I'd be happy to accompany you any time.
They cheers and sip champagne.
David: (Nods towards the dance floor) Wanna dance?
They get up and start towards the dance floor when suddenly two huge men intercept them and pull them by the arm to a dark hallway of the club; they put a knife to each of their throats.
Man 1: (to David) Where did you get that car!?
David: (hands up) Car...what car...huh?
Man 2: (To Maddie) Fess up Blondie, we mean business, why were you in that car!?
Maddie: (Innocently) Car?
Man 1: (In David's face) Car! That fancy car you're driving...who gave it to you!?
David looks at Maddie for answers...
David: Where'd you rent the car, Maddie?
Maddie: (Stalling) ...hmmm, well...I...ummmm
David: (Glib) Her memory isn't what it used to be before the accident…this may take a while…so if you don't mind, we'd like to enjoy the club while she remembers just where she got that car...(puts his finger up.) hold that thought...
He tries to walk back towards the dance floor, taking Maddie by the arm along the way. A third guy steps up to him.
Man 3: A wise guy, huh? You want another black eye to match the one you already got?
Maddie and David back up…they are sandwiched between all three guys.
Man 2: Ok, you don't want to talk! We'll take you somewhere and make you talk.
Maddie and David are dragged out a back door of the club, bound and gagged and thrown into the back of a van as it speeds off.
David: Mmmm. Mmmm mm m mm m m?
Maddie: Ddddd ddd dd d ddd dddddddd!
David: Grrrrrr. Grrrr rrr rr rrr r r?
Maddie: Ssssss ssss ssssss sssssss!
This goes on for 30 minutes as the van drives away from LA and up into some mountains. After a while, Maddie and David are pulled out and thrown onto two chairs inside a dusty garage surrounded by power tools. One of the guys whips off David's gag.
Guy 1: Ok…spill it.
David: (Stands) Oh..great…thank you, I've had to go to take a leak for an hour now…(starts unbuckling his pants.)
Another man steps up, cocks a gun and points it at David, he stops and puts his hands up.
Guy 2: Carlos Medina…nephew of Cuba's biggest drug lord's car was stolen and you're driving it. Now stop messing around and give us an explanation as to why you've stolen this man's car.
David: (Steps back. Looks at Maddie.) Maddie…you stole Carl Medina's car?!
Maddie: (Shocked.) What!?
David: (To the guys.) She's really been bad lately…if you just let me take her home, I'll spank her and put her to bed.
Maddie: I didn't steal anything!?
David: (Takes Maddie's arm.) Well, she said she didn't do it…so, if you don't mind, we left the iron on at home…
They start walking towards the door.
David and Maddie sit where they are…
David: We can fetch and roll over too.
Maddie looks at him like…STOP!
The men move Maddie and David to chairs and tie them back to back.
Man 2: We're not leaving here until we know who stole that car and why…because our boss wants answers, and he is a very, very (puts his nose close to Maddie's) very, impatient man.
For the next two hours, David and Maddie are interrogated by the men one at a time. They are threatened with different power tools…a belt sander to Maddie's heel, a drill to David's belt buckle. Maddie does her best to explain that she rented the car from a very helpful man who swore he wasn't a thief. After she gives a very detailed description of who, what, when and where…the men leave Maddie and David sitting, tied to chairs, and head off to find the guy who rented Maddie the car.
David and Maddie struggle to get free.
David: Just my luck, I finally get you tied up and we're facing the wrong way.
They work to untie each other's knots...
Maddie: A little to the right David…that's it…now I little to the left.
David: Ooooh, I love all this direction, are you as turned on as I am?
Maddie: I just want to get out of here!
Finally, they get David free and he comes around and leans over Maddie, still tied in the chair.
David: I know how to turn this fun evening around from here…
He looks into her eyes and smolders…but she screams in his face.
Maddie: Addison! Get me untied or I will severely hurt you once I am…
David starts untying her PDQ.
David: You forgot to say please…
Finally, she is untied and they run outside only to find the whole place is deserted and they are on top of a mountain.
Maddie: Great, whadda we do now?
David: I don't know, you're taking the lead on this one, this is my evening, remember?
For the next two hours, Maddie and David scurry, slide and climb down the side of the mountain. By the time they are almost to the bottom, they are covered in leaves, and dirt and each of their clothes are ripped in different places. Maddie limps along in her sanded-down heel in front of David who is singing:
David: "Take one down and pass it around…2 bottles of beer on the wall…"
Maddie: Would you stop!
David: I started from 1000…get all the way down to 2 and you want me to stop now?
David: You're the boss.
They come to a bridge that has a rushing river below it, and a mountain on the other side. They stand frozen looking at their choices.
David: Whadda we do now, boss?
Maddie gives him an exhausted look and rolls her eyes.
Maddie: You can swim, can't you?
Maddie walks towards the bridge; David hesitates, but follows…
David: Glad I wore plastic underwear…
David and Maddie look over the side of the bridge to see how far they'd have to jump.
Maddie: You think it's deep enough?
David: I think I'll see you on the other side of the mountain.
David starts walking across the bridge.
David looks back and Maddie looks down at her beaten up shoes. He knows he can't leave her. He walks back and helps her up onto the ledge of the bridge; he climbs up beside her and they hold hands.
David: Now plug your nose, hold your breath, and if you can't tell where you are, follow the bubbles up…
Maddie: Don't let go David.
David: (He looks down.) I'm going to try my very best not to.
He looks deep into Maddie's eyes.
Cut to: Maddie and David crawl up on the sandy shore of a river wet and exhausted.
David: That is the last time I get you all wet without taking your clothes off first.
Maddie: We made it!
David: We did? I didn't feel a thing…I always thought it would be better than that…
Maddie: No David, we made it to land...She crawls over and hugs him.
He hugs Maddie and then lays back exhausted. Maddie hears cars in the distance.
Maddie: Let's go, David, we can get a ride.
Maddie gets to her feet and starts walking…
David: You gonna steal another one?
Maddie: I did not steal that man's car…it was just a big misunderstanding…
David gets up and walks after her.
David: How come I gotta understand that, but you can't understand a simple ticket mix-up?
Maddie growls and keeps walking as her wet and broken shoes squelch beneath her. At dawn, Maddie and David stand on the side of a busy road with their thumbs out.
David: Maddie Hayes hitchhiking…never thought I'd see the day.
Maddie: Well, you never asked me how I spent my summer after college?
David: What? No.
Maddie: Does that surprise you?
David stands with a dumb smile on his face not knowing if he should believe her or not.
David: After tonight, I'm not sure if anything about you should surprise me.
Maddie throws him a half smile and shrugs. Just then an 18-wheeler truck starts blowing it's horn and pulls to the side of the road. Maddie and David run to climb in the cab of the truck. A female truck driver named Lucille greets them.
Lucille: Well, you two look like you've been to hell and back…
David: You can say that again.
Lucille: Well, you two look like you've been to hell and back.
David: Lucille, you're my kinda gal.
Lucille: Where to?
Maddie: Los Angeles.
Lucille: You're in luck, that's my next stop.
David: How far away are we?
Lucille: Two hours.
David: I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours…
Maddie grins and looks out the side window as David and Lucille swap stories.
CUT TO: An hour and a half later Lucille, Maddie and David are just outside Los Angeles…Lucille and David sing; Maddie sleeps on David's shoulder.
Lucille and David: "…take me home…to the place, I belong…West Virginia, Mountain Mama…take me home…country road."
They finish the song and smile. Lucille peeks over at a sleeping Maddie. She nudges David.
Lucille: So, tell me about her.
David looks at Maddie.
David: Her? Oh, she's just somebody I met through the "Make a Wish" Foundation…It was her dying request to go out with me.
Lucille: Come on Addison…you don't go traipsing over the river and through the woods with somebody you don't really care about.
David: Care? There are lots of things I care about, but this little adventure was just to get 'ole stuffy pants here out on the town for an evening of fun.
Lucille: I don't believe that…I see something between the two of you…something unusual…almost mystical…
David: Sounds like I'd better make an appointment with a Shamen.
Lucille: Ok…deflect all you want, but I've been around the block more than a few times. I know attraction when I see it.
David: Let's rewind to care…maybe there is some of that.
David puckers his lips and gives Lucille a little smirk…she throws him a knowing smile back. Maddie's eyes open slightly and she blinks them closed again.
Twenty minutes later Lucille drops them off in front of the Blue Moon office building. They wave goodbye.
David and Maddie: Bye! Bye Lucille! Thanks again for everything!
David: We'll see you at little Mark's briss!
David and Maddie stand on the sidewalk face to face looking at each other. David chuckles.
David: Maddie…Maddie…(claps his hands.) Maddie…you outdid yourself…this was the best night of my life! I don't know how you did it…how you planned all of it…but…all I have to say is…wow.
Maddie: Wow…yeah, right wow…we could have been killed!
David: Ok, ok…you can drop the act now. We're back…you did it. You planned the wildest evening you could think of and pulled it off without a hitch.
Maddie: Act? Drop the act? I'm not acting David. I only planned to take you to Randy's club, and then maybe for a late night hoagie, and drop you back home by 2:30am!
David: (Disbelieving) What!? Are you saying that you didn't hire those guys to kidnap us…that someone wasn't nearby to help us if we needed it in that river, and that Lucille there isn't straight from central casting!?
Maddie: David!? No! None of these people were hired by me…I just rented that car from the wrong person out of desperation and all of this transpired…by the way, his mother is going to be very disappointed.
David: Maddie!? Are you nuts! We could have been killed!
Maddie: That's what I'm trying to tell you!
David ruffles his dry, dirty hair. Laughs and takes Maddie by the arm and walks her into the Blue Moon building and into the elevator. When the elevator dings and opens on the 20th floor the two shuffle out looking like a couple of zombies. They make their way into Blue Moon, and turn and face each other in the main office.
David: Planned or not, it's been one hell of a night.
Maddie: It sure has. I'm sorry I got us into all this trouble.
David: It's ok partner…we made it through together.
Maddie: Why don't you go clean yourself up and I'll drive you home.
David: You do the same, and I'll meet you right back here in 15 minutes.
They stand and smolder at each other as if something more needs to be said, but they turn and walk towards their respective offices. Suddenly David turns:
Maddie: (turns) David!
David: I was wrong by the way – no one gets down better than Maddie Hayes.
Maddie: And there's no one else I would have wanted to have a fun...or fine evening with.
They smile at each other. And turn; just as Maddie is at the door of her office...
Maddie: Oh, and I care about you too…
David: What was that?
Maddie: You heard me.