Warnings/notes : songfic, Yohji x Omi, fluff, mild angst, not much of either Aya or Ken, shifting povs [between Yohji and Omi]
Disclaimer : I don't own Weiss Kreuz.
written at 22nd april 2003, by Misura. part 4 of 4
The song 'Real sugar' belongs to Roxette. Lyrics may be slightly altered.
//Real sugar, I don't wanna climb no walls
Real sugar, that's what I want or none at all// [Yohji]
Omi lets his head hang in shame. I feel horrible for being the cause of it ; I didn't mean to make him feel embarrassed. Surprisingly I'm not even angry with him. If it had been Ken or Aya, I know I would have been yelling at them by now. But this is Omi.
I want to embrace him, tell him it's okay, that I'm not mad at him. I could forgive him practically anything. And, as I said, there are no secrets on display in my room. The worst he might have seen are the trousers I wore yesterday and tossed in a corner rather than in the washing-basket because I was lazy once again.
I remember holding him when he was upset. This time it's different. Not because of him, but because of me. I have come to the unpleasant discovery I can't trust myself around Omi.
"Yohji-kun. Are you still there?" he whispers. His voice sounds strange.
"Yes, of course." I reply. "Why wouldn't I be?"
"Because I repulse you." he says. He sounds like he means it, like he thinks I would be right in feeling that way about him. I ignore what I consider as my good sense (but who knows about that for sure?) and walk over to him, putting my arms around his waist and gently turning him around to look at his face.
Silver tears are sliding down his cheeks. He is crying. He is in pain.
I want to comfort him so much, I have to fight to keep from kissing each and every tear away. Because that would be sick ; profitting from his innocent, guilty feelings about giving in to curiosity. Nothing more is involved on his side ; he said he was angry and disappointed, I know, but ... but ...
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." he repeats, while I gently rock his body (and mine, since we're still in an embrace) back and forth. He shouldn't be sorry ; he has done nothing wrong.
"Hush, it's okay. Everything's okay, Omitchi."
While the slow flood of tears comes to a halt, I tell myself I shouldn't be enjoying this as much as I do. I should stop doing this, stop holding him. I don't want to.
//Real sugar, sweeter than sweet can be
Real sugar, that's what you've got so stay with me// [Omi]
Yohji is cuddling me and it feels so good I never want him to go away again. I know he only does it to comfort me, that he will remove his arms as soon as I am done crying.
I look up at his face. His eyes are gazing at me with something so close to love, so close to what I want to see in them that I have to convince myself it's not true. I'm just imagining things.
"Finished?" he asks softly. In his voice too I hear he loves me. I'm such an idiot! Of course he doesn't! He may comfort me when I'm sad, cheer me up and make me laugh but that doesn't mean anything. Does it?
"Yes. I think so." My voice stil trembles a bit. He smiles at me.
"If you ever feel an urge to come and take a look in my room again, just knock and ask, okay? I hate seeing you upset like this over a small matter like that." I nod. A small matter?
"I will." I will never take him up on that offer.
"Good. Now, would you like to see a movie? I read there's a good one starting in a few minutes."
"Are you going out again?" I ask. Why wouldn't he? It's still early, by his standards.
"No." He shakes his head. "I thought I'd stay at home this this evening. So, are you interested or do you have something better to do on your computer?" Better than watching a movie with Yohji? Not very likely! I was so scared he would notice something, but he has written it all on account of curiosity. I'm still cute, little, innocent Omi to him and for once, I'm glad with it.
This will be just like a date. My first date at that.
Only when Yohji blinks I realize I have said that last thought aloud. Ooops.
I wait for the blow. I'll do my best not to start crying again. It would make him feel bad, I know.
"There are actually two movies on tonight, which one would you like to see? One of them's a romantic movie the other one's action."
Not what I expected. It takes me a while to fully understand the question. The choice is easily made though, even if it will be nothing but a deception of myself.
"The romantic one." I answer.
He chuckles. "Very suitable for a first date."
I don't remember much of the movie. Yohji said it was pretty good, so apparently he did watch it. My eyes were more directed at him than at the screen. I can see a movie anytime I want to on the Internet after all.
//And give me real sugar
Gimme gimme real sugar// [Yohji]
I don't pay much attention to the movie, but at the end of it I remark to Omi it was a pretty good one. He looks at me blankly ; I hope it wasn't too bad.
As I escort him to his room, he asks me why. I reply I always bring my dates home afterwards ; that it's a part of the date. I know I'm pushing it, but somehow I feel lucky tonight.
Omi has spend nearly two hours in my arms. I am in heaven.
At his door we halt. He turns to me, a teasing look on his face.
"Am I supposed to ask you in for some coffee now?" He starts to laugh as I blush. Who would have thought that Omi, of all people, would be able to make me do that?
"Of course not. Though a good-night-kiss would be nice." I reply, making sure my tone is light enough for that last to be taken as nothing more than a joke.
Gimme gimme real sugar// [Omi]
I don't know if he means that last thing about a good-night-kiss. His voice is bordering on joking, but I think (or am I just imagining that?) I hear something wistful in it.
So I kiss him.
The first real kiss I have ever given anyone, to thank him for a wonderful first date. It's suitable.
"Next week again?" I ask boldly, as he still stands, a rather funny look on his face.
Then his smile returns. "No. I don't think so."
"W-what?" He doesn't want to? Did I do something wrong again?
"Let's go to the real movies next week. And have dinner aforehand."
"I would like that!" I reply. "Very much." Maybe later I will get back at him for teasing me like that.
"It's a date then." He nods. "Now, go to get some sleep or you'll not be able to wake up in time for your morningshift tomorrow."
I sigh and start closing the door, before I remember something.
"Yohji-kun! I don't even *have* the morning-shift! You do, with Ken-kun."
I hear him mutter something. Then : "Thanks Omi. Just what I wanted to hear."
"Enjoy your rest, while you can, Yohji-kun." I grin.
"You too, Omitchi, you too. I don't want you to be all tired on our next date."
I'll be nice and let him have the last say.
"Good night, Yohji."
"Good night, Omi. Sweet dreams."