AN- Sorry its been so long since you guys have heard from me. Im sorry this isnt a new chapter for Tris' Life After Initiation. Im like so bady stumped on where to go with that, I have so many ideas for the story but cant figure out where to go in between them without having major time gaps. But this is another one shot of mine. Im curently listening to Evanescence and skimming through my Divergent book where all my book marks are and think I found a good chapter and ideas for it. So lets hope this turns out alright. This also might have some errors in spelling and punctuation. Im sorry.. Its a new laptop and it doesnt have word because Microsoft wants you to buy everything and I dont have the money. So I'm using the notebook/wordpad app. This app doesnt even give me a word count lol. Origanlly I was going to do a chapter on Tris seeing Four's back tattoo. But I think I'm going to do Four's Fear Landscape. I dont think I'll write them all or even follow the book all the way through the fear landscape because that is like 11 pages and thats allot of writing and I dont feel like getting yelled at plagerizing this chapter. So I'll go to bascally when they start it. Then sum up the fears as best as I can till I get to the one fear that I kind of want to change it a bit. We all know that his fears are Heights, Confinement, im kinda confused how to lable the third but killing the women, and his father.
Four's Fear Landscape
Across the room, Four stands at the door to the fear landscape. He holds a black box in one hand and a syringe in the other.
"Since you're here," he says. withour looking over his soulder, "you might as well go in with me."
I bit my lip. "Into your fear landscape?"
As I walk toward him, I ask, "I can do that?"
"The serum connects you to the program." he says. "but the program determines whose landscape you go through. And right now, it's set to put us through mine."
"You would let me see that?"
"Why else do you think I'm going in?" he asks quietly.
He doesn't lift his eyes. "There are some things I want to show you."
He holds up the syringe, and I tilt my head to better expose my neck. I feel sharp pain when the needle goes in, but I am use to it now. When he's done, he offers me the black box. In it is another syringe.
"I've never done this before," I say as I take it out of the box. I don't want to hurt him.
"Right here," he says, touching a spot on his neck with his fingernail. I stand on my tiptoes and push the needle in, my hand shaking a little. He doesn't even flinch.
He keeps his eyes on me the whole time, and when I'm done, puts both syringes in the box and sets it by the door. He knew that I would follow him up here, knew, or hoped. Either way is fine with me.
He offers me his hand, and I slide mine into it. His fingers are cold and brittle. I feel like there is something I should say, but I am too stunned and can't come up with words. He opens the door with his free hand, and I follow him into the dark. I am now used to entering unknown places without hesitation. I keep my breaths even and hold firmily to Four's hand.
"See if you can figure out why they call me Four," he says.
The door clicks shut behind us, taking all the light with it. The air is cold in the hallway; I feel each particle enter my lungs. I inch closer to him so my arm is against is and my chin is near his shoulder.
"What's your real name?" I ask.
"See if you can figure that out too."
The stimulation takes us. The ground I stand on is no longer made of cement. It creaks like metal. Light pours in from all angles, and the city unfolds around us, glass buildings and the arc of the train tracks, and we are high about it. I haven't seen a blue sky in a long time, so when it spreads out about me, I feel the breath catch in my lungs and the effect is dizzying.
Then the wind starts. It blows so hard I have to lean against Four to stay on my feet. He removes his hand from mine and wraps his arm around my shoulders instead. At first I think it's to protect me-but no, he's having trouble breathing and he need m to steady him. He forces breath in and out through an open mough and his teeth are clenched.
The height is beautiful to me, but if it's here, it is one of his worst nightmares.
"We have to jump off, right?" I shout over the wind.
"On three, okay?"
"One...two...three!" I pull him with me as I burst into a run. After WE take the first step, the rest is easy. We both sprint off the edge of the building. We fall like two stones, fast, the air pushing back at us, the ground growing beneath us. Then the scene disappears, and I am on my hands and knees on the floor, grinning. I loved that rush the day I chose Dauntless, and I love it now.
Next to me, Four gasps and presses a hand to his chest.
I get up and help him to his feet. "What's next?"
Something solid hits my spine. I slam into Four. my head hitting his collarbone. Walls appear on my left and my right. The space is so narrow that Four has to pull his arms into his chest to fit. A ceiling slams onto the walls around us with a crack, and Four hunches over, groaning. The room is just big enough to accommodate his size, and no bigger.
"Confinement," I say.
He makes a guttural noise. I tilt my head and pull back enough to look at him. I can barely see his face, it's so dark, and the air is close; we share breaths. He grimaces like he's in pain.
"Hey," I say. "It's okay. Here-"
I guide his arms around my body so he has more space. He clutches at my back and puts his face next to mine, still hunched over. His body is warm, but I feel only his bones and the muscles that wraps around them; nothing yields beneath me. My cheeks get hot. Can he tell that I'm still build like a child?
"This is the first time I'm happy I'm so small." I laugh. If I joke, maybe I can calm him down. And distract myself.
"Mmhmm," he says. His voice sounds strained.
"We can't break out of here," I say. "It's easier to face the fear head on, right?" I don't wait for a response. "So what you need to do is make the space smaller. Make it worse so it gets better. Right?"
"Yes." It is a tight tense word.
"Okay. We'll have to crouch, then. Ready?"
I sqeeze his waist to pull him down with me. I feel the hard line of his rib against my hand and hear the screech of one wood plank against another as the ceiling inches down with us. I realize that we won't fit with all this space between us, so I turn and curl into a ball, my spine against his chest. One of his knees is bent next to my head and the other is curled beneath me so I'm sitting on his ankle. We are a jumble of limbs. I feel a harsh breath against my ear.
"Ah," he says, his voice raspy. "This is worse. This is definitely..."
"Shh," I say. "Arms around me."
Obediently, he slips both arms around my waist. I smile at the wall. I am not enjoying this. I am not, not even a little bit, no.
"The simulation measures your fear response," I say, softly. I'm just repeating what he toldus, but reminding him might help him. "So if you can calm your heartbeat down, it will move on to the next one. Remember? So try to forget that we're here."
"Yeah?" I feel his lips move against my ear as he speaks, and heat courses through me. "That easy, huh?"
"You know, most boys would enjoy being trapped in a close quarters with a girl." I roll my eyes.
"Not claustophobic people, Tris!" He sounds deseperate now.
"Okay, Okay." I set my hand on top of his and guide it to my chest, so it's right over my heart. "Feel my heartbeat. Can you feel it?"
"Feel how steady it is?"
"Yes, well, that has nothing to do with the box." I wince as soon as I'm done speaking. I just admitted to something. Hopefully he doesn't realize that. "Every time you feel me breathe, you breathe. Focus on that."
(This is where I stop following the book. Sorry for the long ass part from the book but it didnt sound right to me to just start here lol)
As I try and calm down my heart and breathe slowly in and out for Four to follow. After a few minutes of this I can finally feel him starting to breathe slower. "Why don't you tell me where this fear come from. Maybe talking might help us somehow?" So Four tells me abit about where this fear comes from. As he's talking I'm so glad that I'm facing away from him because of my blush. But after a while he doesn't want to talk about his fear anymore and ask's me. "Why is your heart racing, Tris?"
I cringe and say, "Well, I..." I search for an excuse that wont invole his arms around me and his hand on my chest. "I barely know you and I'm crammed up against you in a box. Four, what do you think?"
He laughs and asks, "Tris if we were in your fear landscape would I be in it?"
I blush and sputter, "I'm not afraid of you."
Four laughs again, "Of course you're not. But that's not what I ment."
He laughs again, and when he does, the walls break apart witha crack and fall away, leaving us in a circle of light. Four sighs and retracts his arms from around me and slowly gets up. I scramble to my feet and brush myself off. I feel cold now that hes not pressed against me. But I look away from him to hide my blush.
I still cant get the feeling of being in the box with Four and being pressed up against each other. At least I chose to sit with my back to him instead of laying down and pulling him with my and setting his head on my chest. That would have been more accward.
With that thought in my head. He stands in front of me, He's grinning, and I'm not sure I like that look in his eyes.
"Maybe you were cut out for Candor," he says, " because you're a terrible liar."
"I think my aptitude test ruled that one out pretty well."
He shakes his head. "The aptitude test tells you nothing Tris."
I narrow my eyes. "What are you trying to tell me? Your test ins't the reason you ended up in Dauntess?"
Excitement runs through me in hopes that he sutely told me he's Divergent like me, that we can figure it out together and I won't be alone in this.
"Not exactly, no," he says. "I-"
He looks over his shoulder and his voice trails off. I'm still realing on this little bit of information that he gave me. But I'm still curious as to what this fear is. There is a women that I can't place across from us with a gun pointing at us. All that seperates us is a table in front of us with a gun on it. I look at Four. He says, "This is one is not so bad." I look at the gun and her and ask softly, "You have to kill her?"
"Every single time."
"She's not real." I tell him.
"She looks real." He bites his lip. "It feels real."
We just stand there untill he just grabs the gun and shoots her to get this fear over with. There isn't as much panic in this one just dread. But I still can't get over the first two fears. They both caused him to tense up and get lost in his head. Not this one as much.
Four's gun drops with a tump. We stare at her fallen body. What he said is true-it does feel real. Don't be rediculous. I grab his arm.
"C'mon," I say. "Let's go. Keep moving."
After a few tugs, he comes out of his daze and follows me. As we pass the table, the women's body disappers, except in my memory and his. What would it be like to kill someone every time I went through my landscape? Maybe I'll find out.
But something puzzles me: These are supposed to be Four's worst fears. And though he panicked in the box and on the roof, he killed the women without much difficutly. It seems like the simulation is grasping at any fear it can find within him, and it hasn't found much.
"Here we go," he whispers.
A dark figure moves ahead of us, creeping along the edge of the circle of light, waiting for us to take another step. Who is it? Who frequents Four's nightmares?
The man slowly comes into the light. He is wearing the plain grey clothes of Abnegation and looks familar. Then it clicks who it is.
"Marcus," I whisper.
"Here's the part," Four says, his voice is shaking, "where you figure out my name."
"Is he..." I look from Marcus and Four, who is inching away from him, and everything comes back together. Marcus had a son who left to go to Dauntless. His name was..."Tobias."
Marcus shows us his hands. A belt is curled around one of his fists. He slowly unwinds it from his fingers.
"This is for your own good," he says, and his voice echoes a dozen times.
A dozen Macuses press into the circle of light around us all with the same belt and the same blank expression on his face.
I look at Four-Tobias-and he seems frozen. His posture sags. He looks years older; he looks year younger. The first Marcus yanks his arms back, the belt sailing over his shoulder like he's ready to strike. Tobias shrinks backk, throwing his hands in front of his face to protect himself.
I dart infront of him and the belt cracks against my wrist, wrapping around it. A hot pain races up my arm to my elbow. I grit my teeth and pull as hard as I can. Marcus loses his grip, so I unwrap the belt and grab it by the buckle.
I swing my arm as fast as I can, my shoulder screaming and burning from the sudden motion. The belt strikes Marcus in the shoulder. He yells and lunges at me with outstreached hand, with fingernails that look like claws. Tobias pushes me behind him so he stands between me and Marcus. He looks angry now not afraid.
All the Marcuses vanish. The lights come on, revealing a long, narrow room with busted brick walls and a cement floor.
"That's it?" I say. "Those wer your worst fears? Why do you only have four..." My voice trails off. Only four fears.
"Oh." I look over my shoulder at him. "That's why they call you-"
All words fail me once I see his face. His eyes are wide and so vulnerable under the room's light. His lips are parted. If we were not here, I would describe the look as awe. As well as dewl on how I felt during the fear landscape. But now is not the time. I still would not be sure why he would be looking at me in awe.
He wraps his hand around my wrist that Marcus his with the belt and light rubs it in soothing motoins. At first it stings, like the belt was real, but its as pale as the rest of me. So I know it wasn't real. His lips slowly move against my cheek, then his arms tighten around me, and he burries his face in my neck, breathing against my collarbone.
I stand stiffly for a second and then loop my arms around him and sigh.
"Hey," I say softly. "We got through it."
He lifts his head and looks me in the eye while slipping his fingers through my hair. Tucking it behind my ear and we stare at each other in silence. As his fingers move absently over a lock of my hair.
"You got me through it," he says finally.
"Well." My throat is dry. I try to ignore the nervous electricity that pulses through me every second he touches me. "It's easy to be brave when they're not my fears."
I let my hands drop and casually wipe them on my jeans, hoping he doesn't notice.
If he does, he doesn't say so. He laces his fingers with mine.
"Come on," he says. "I have something else to show you."
As we walk to where he wants to show me his fears are still realing through my head. The tight spaces one still wont leave my mind as well as his father. How could you do that to your own son and not feel remorse. I shake my head and try and get that picture out of my head.
AN- Im sorry if its not a whole lot different as the book. But I was trying to stay within the feel of the book and Tris' character. I really hope you guys love it. Again I'm so sorry for the long wait on my story. But you guys will have to bare with me some more as I try and write something that I like and sounds good.