Love Hina – Relations

Fanfic by Urashima Kanako (Do not worry. The Writer is safe, for now.)

Chapter Four – Plans (I prefer to call it The Anticipation of Naru's Downfall)

Saturday Night (The best time for this kind of work)

Kuro-nya looks up at Kanako and tilts its head.

"I have no idea how you managed to trap the Writer, meow, but I still think that it's a bad move."

Kanako sits at her desk and continues applying her disguise.

"He will not remain entrapped for long. However, I intend to be finished well before then. Keitaro-kun must be saved from that wretched female."

The cat jumps up on the desk and studies Kanako's handiwork.

"Meow. All those years of sneaking into Keitaro's room and wearing his clothes have paid off. You've gotten pretty good at imitating him. I still don't understand why you were acting like you were him talking to yourself. What is a tryst anyways? "

Kanako pauses and looks at Kuro-nya.

"That is no concern of yours."

"Why do you blush whenever you tell me that it is none of my concern, meow?"

"That is none of your . . . never mind. How do I look?"

The cat leaps off the desk and walks around Kanako, nodding its head as it does.

"Meow! Perfect! I'd never know it wasn't you! So, what are you going to do now?"

Kanako adjusts the sweater as she moves towards the door. In an uncanny imitation of Keitaro's voice, she answers her cat.

"I'm going to see Narusegawa, of course. A nice evening stroll would be very romantic."

A minute later, she knocks on Naru's door.

"Narusegawa, are you still up? It's Keitaro."

A few seconds later, Naru slides open the door and smiles at the disguised Kanako.

"Keitaro, is something wrong?"

"No, nothing's wrong. I was just wondering if you would like to go for a walk. It's still a nice evening."

Naru quickly turns around and grabs her coat.

"I'd love to! You really are very sweet!"

She closes her door and slides her arm around Kanako's, unaware that the real Keitaro is still in his room.

A few minutes later, they are walking near one of the old buildings behind Hinata-sou. Naru leans her head on Kanako's shoulder and sighs.

"This is so romantic, Keitaro. The moonlight makes you look like another person. It's almost magical."

Kanako stops walking and turns towards Naru. She reaches up and runs her fingers through her long, brown hair.

"There is something that I want to tell you, Narusegawa."

Naru turns and looks at her. Kanako slowly leans forward and Naru closes her eyes.

"What is it, Keitaro?"

Kanako gently places her fingers against Naru's cheeks.

"Die, you witch!"

Kanako wraps her hands around Naru's throat and pins her against the wall. After a few moments struggling, Naru slides to the ground. Kanako continues squeezing her neck, ensuring that no life remains in her body. She drags Naru into the trees and heads back to the tool shed. A half-hour later, Kanako places the last of the dirt on the mound. After hiding the shovel, she brushes her hands off and heads back to the Inn. She quietly enters her room, drops a bag, and begins to remove her disguise as Kuro-nya sits on the window ledge watching her.

"You know, meow, that they will send you to prison if they ever find out what you did, meow."

Kanako moves to the closet and removes her disguise.

"It matters not. The deed is done and Keitaro is safe. If my plan continues as I foresee it, no one will ever know."

The cat licks its paw and rubs it behind its ear.

"Meow, what about the, you know, the Writer?"

Kanako shrugs her shoulders.

"What is written is written. No one can change that. Naru is dead and Keitaro will become mine. He will think that I am Naru for a time, but eventually, he will have to accept that he married me."

"How are you going to get him to ask you to marry him, meow?"

Kanako reaches into the bag and pulls out the clothes that Naru had on when she strangled her.

"I will make it simple for him. Naru will ask him to marry her."

Kuro-nya rests its head on its paws.

"Meow, you are devious, aren't you?"

She smiles at the cat as she slips into Naru's clothes.

"Yes I am. And no one is left to stand in my way."

A few minutes later, Kanako knocks on Keitaro's door.

"Keitaro, are you still awake? It's me, Narusegawa."

Keitaro slides open the door and smiles at her.

"Hi Narusegawa, is something wrong?"

"No, I just thought you'd like to go for a walk. It's still a nice evening tonight."

Keitaro reaches over to his coat stand and grabs his jacket.

"That's a great idea! Let's go."

Kuro-nya sits on the roof and watches the two walk around behind the inn. The cat crosses its front paws and rests its head on them. After a few seconds, it looks at the figure sitting nearby.

"Meow, if she finds out that I let you loose, she'll dress me like a turtle and lock me in a room with Su-chan. However, I would rather face her wrath then see her sent to prison. Are you sure that you can fix things that have already been written?"

The figure nods its head and reaches for a laptop. Opening it and pressing the keys, a new story begins to unfold. Kuro-nya jumps up to a shoulder and watches the sentences form.

"Ha ha! Good one, meow! That is poetic justice at its finest! Just don't send her to prison. She'd be really miserable there, meow."

The cat watches the figure type a sentence. Its eyes go wide.

"Meow, uh, I didn't mean for it to sound like I was telling you what to do! It was, just a suggestion!"

The figure looks at the cat and then erases the last line. Kuro-nya wipes a paw across its forehead.

"Whew, thank you, meow! I really hate dogs!"

As this continues, Kanako leads Keitaro into the forest and stands on the mound where Naru's body is buried. She turns, wraps her arms around his neck, and pulls his lips against hers. Keitaro stiffens for a few moments and then closes his eyes. After what seems like hours, Kanako pulls back and waits for him to open his eyes.

"Keitaro-kun, let's not wait until we make it into Toudai. Let's get married as soon as possible."

Keitaro stares at her, eyes wide. Slowly, his mind starts to process what he just heard. He pictures a ceremony in the field behinds Hinata-sou, followed by a wild reception with all of their friends. He sees them going to Sapporo for their honeymoon, staying at a mountain cabin. He imagines a romantic dinner, followed by a dip in the private hot spring, together, unclothed, just the two of them, unclothed, in the water, unclothed, Naru slides close to him, unclothed. . .

Keitaro falls over backwards as blood gushes from his nostrils.

"Gack!"

Back on the rooftop, Kuro-nya watches the Writer compose sentences with a flurry of keystrokes.

"I hope that you use the spell and grammar checker, there's a few typo's in there, meow. It would be kind of silly to have her fall into the hot string instead of the hot spring!"

The figure nods its head and begins to proofread the work. After a few minutes, the work is saved and filed it into a sub-folder. The cat taps the Writer's shoulder.

"Can I click the REPLACE CHAPTER button, huh? Please, pretty please, meow?"

The Writer smiles and nods. Kuro-nya rubs its paws together and reaches for the mouse pad.

"Meow! And away we go!"

. . .

Love Hina – Relations

Fanfic by Steven Biggs

Chapter Four – Plans

Saturday Night

The cat jumps up on the desk and studies Kanako's handiwork.

"Meow. All those years of sneaking into Keitaro's room and wearing his clothes have paid off. You've gotten pretty good at imitating him. I still don't understand why you were acting like you were him talking to yourself. Won't a tryst give you a rash? "

Kanako pauses and looks at Kuro-nya.

"That is no concern of yours."

"You were thinking dirty thoughts again, weren't you, meow?"

"That is none of your . . . never mind. How do I look?"

The cat leaps off the desk and walks around Kanako, nodding its head as it does.

"Meow! Perfect! I'd never know it wasn't you! So, you gonna go for a walk?"

Kanako adjusts the sweater as she moves towards the door. In an uncanny imitation of Keitaro's voice, she answers her cat.

"You are very perceptive, Kuro-nya. A nice evening stroll would be very romantic."

As she leaves, the cat rushes up to the roof and waits.

"This is gonna be good, meow!"

A minute later, Kanako knocks on Naru's door.

"Narusegawa, are you still up? It's Keitaro."

A few seconds later, Naru slides open the door and smiles at the disguised Kanako.

"Keitaro, is something wrong?"

"No, nothing's wrong. I was just wondering if you would like to go for a walk. It's still a nice evening."

Naru quickly turns around and grabs her coat.

"I'd love to! You really are very sweet!"

She closes her door and slides her arm around Kanako's, unaware that the real Keitaro is still in his room.

A few minutes later, they are walking near one of the old buildings behind Hinata-sou. Naru leans her head on Kanako's shoulder and sighs.

"This is so romantic, Keitaro. The moonlight makes you look like another person. It's almost magical."

Kanako stops walking and turns towards Naru. Suddenly, soft lips press firmly against hers. Kanako's eyes lose focus and then slowly close. She pulls back and shakes her head.

"Uh, I ah, there is something that, uh, I want to ask you, Narusegawa."

Naru gazes into her eyes.

"What is it, Keitaro?"

Kanako gently places her fingers against Naru's cheeks.

"Do you, dye your hair?"

Kanako grabs Naru's shoulders and pins her against the wall. After a few moments massaging, Naru slides to the ground. Kanako continues the massage, ensuring that her body is comfortable. Later, as she dances with her into the forest, Naru accidentally falls into a pit and knocks herself out. Kanako stares down at her for a few moments.

"How convenient!"

A half-hour later, Kanako places the last of the dirt on the mound. After hiding the shovel, she brushes her hands off and heads back to the Inn. She quietly enters her room, drops a bag, and begins to remove her disguise as Kuro-nya sits on the window ledge watching her.

"You know, meow, that they will send you to prison if they ever find out what you did, meow."

Kanako moves to the closet and removes her disguise.

"It matters not. The deed is done and Keitaro is safe. If my plan continues as I foresee it, no one will ever know. Why are you smiling like that?"

The cat licks its paw and rubs it behind its ear.

"Meow, oh, no reason!"

Kanako shrugs her shoulders.

"Naru is finished and Keitaro will become mine. He will think that I am Naru for a time, but eventually, he will have to accept that he married me."

"How are you going to get him to ask you to marry him, meow?"

Kanako reaches into the bag and pulls out the clothes that Naru had on.

"I will make it simple for him. Naru will ask him to marry her."

Kuro-nya rests its head on its paws.

"Meow, you are devious, aren't you?"

She smiles at the cat as she slips into Naru's clothes.

"Yes I am. And no one is left to stand in my way."

Kanako pauses for a moment at the door.

"Whoa! Deja vu!"

A few minutes later, Kanako knocks on Keitaro's door.

"Keitaro, are you still awake? It's me, Narusegawa."

Keitaro slides open the door and smiles at her.

"Hi Narusegawa, is something wrong?"

"No, I just thought you'd like to go for a walk. It's still a nice evening tonight."

Keitaro reaches over to his coat stand and grabs his jacket.

"That's a great idea! Let's go."

As he turns after closing the door, Keitaro slips and falls to the floor. He looks at his hands and sees a skirt wrapped in his fingers. Looking up, he sees a pair of teddy bear panties before Kanako pulls her skirt up again. He stands up and bows to her.

"I'm sorry Narusegawa! It was an accident, really! I never knew that you liked the same kind of underwear as Kanako-chan."

Kanako blushes as she looks at him.

(I do not remember writing this. I must not have been concentrating and was carried away.)

"That's okay. I'm kind of used to this by now. Shall we go outside?"

Kuro-nya sits on the roof and watches the two walk around behind the inn. The cat crosses its front paws and rests its head on them.

"Meow, I could feel the warmth of her blushing all the way up here!"

Kanako leads Keitaro into the forest, close to the pit that Naru fell in. She turns, wraps her arms around his neck, and pulls him close. Just before their lips meet, a body falls between them. They each step back and look at the ground. Keitaro scratches the back of his head.

"Mutsumi-san! What are you doing here?"

The melon-girl sits up and places a hand against the side of her head.

"Oh my! I was looking for my car keys and got lost."

"You don't have a car! I thought we made that clear last Christmas!"

"That's right! Then, why did you invite me out here?"

Naru pokes her head up through the dirt.

"Otohime-san, you are such a ditz!"

Kanako stares at Naru as she pulls herself up out of the hole. A few seconds later, she stands up and brushes herself off.

"I must've slipped while we were dancing Keitaro. But, how did all this dirt fall in on me?"

Keitaro just stares at her. A small trickle of blood starts to flow from one nostril.

Naru looks over at Kanako.

"What am I doing over there? How can I be over there when I'm over here? But, if I'm over here, why am I over there too?"

Kanako points at Naru.

"Keitaro! That must be some evil doppelganger that's planning to hurt me! Save me Keitaro!"

Keitaro shakes his head to clear it and moves towards Kanako. As he reaches her, he trips over a tree root. Falling to the ground, he reaches out for anything to hold. He grabs the clothes that Kanako is wearing, with the obvious results. He looks up and sees the results off his fall.

"I knew it! You are Kanako-chan! I thought it was strange that Narusegawa would wear teddy bear panties! Liddo-kun are more her style!"

Mutsumi looks around and claps her hands.

"Oh my! Is this a new game? Can I play too?"

She begins to pull off her skirt and blouse. Keitaro's head falls to the ground and a puddle of blood flows from his nose.

"Gack!"

Kuro-nya lands on Kanako's shoulder and whispers in her ear.

"I think the Writer is back. Meow, you'd better back off while you can, before something really nasty happens."

Kanako turns and heads back to the Inn. She pauses for a second and then turns around. Poking her fingers against her cheeks, she smiles and sticks out her tongue.

"April Fools!"

Keitaro, Naru and Mutsumi stare at her as she runs off. As she nears the building, she looks at the cat.

"That dratted Writer! I almost won! I'll have my revenge on him someday!"

At that point, Kanako trips on a broom and falls into the hot spring. Her head pokes up and she spits a stream of water from her mouth. An aluminum wash pan falls from the sky and hits her head. As she stares at the water, Tama-chan surfaces with her panties in its mouth and flies up and over the Inn."

"Okay, okay, I get the message. I'll be a good girl."

Another pan falls and strikes her on the head. Kanako raises her hand and uncrosses her fingers.

"Alright, already! I promise to be good from now on! Geez!"

End of chapter Four.