Lawndale's Newest Cape

"Hello, everyone! I'm Linda Griffin and I'm interviewing Lawndale's latest Cape." A girl wearing a skintight red-and-white body-suit with a capital C on her chest, her face concealed by a mask stood next to Ms. Griffin. Most of her features were covered by her costume, but viewers could tell that she was relatively short, female, and had long auburn hair. The girl's facial expression was hidden by her mask but her body language said she did not look happy and did not want to be there.

"So what brought you to Lawndale, Miss?" asked Ms. Griffin.

"I got tired of west Texas," the Cape replied. Her voice sounded almost Midwestern, howbeit with traces of a west Texas drawl.

"Did you always know that you were a parahuman or did your have a triggering experience?" asked Linda.

"I had a bad day," the Cape replied. "Let's leave it at that."

"I see you have a costume," said Linda.

"Yes, I made it myself," the Cape replied. "It took me a while; I'm not good at sewing and tailoring, but I managed."

"So why did you choose red and white for your colors?" asked Lina.

"Because the colors I really wanted were already taken by some heavy-hitting supervillains," the Cape replied. "They don't like copycats and the last kid at the crayon box doesn't get such a wide range of choices."

"So what do you call yourself?" asked Linda Griffin.

The Cape glanced at Linda in irritation, then looked at the camera. "When I'm in costume, I call myself Cynic."

"So what are your Powers?" asked Linda.

"I've got super-speed, super-strength, I'm hard to hurt, and I can bore holes in things with my eyes if I stare at them long enough," said Cynic.

Has your change to Parahuman status caused any major changes in your life?" asked Linda.

"I had to get a trainer and I take PE more seriously these days," Cynic replied.

"Have you met some of Lawndale's other Parahumans?" asked Linda.

"Yes," said Cynic. "I've met Dark and Brainstorm. I hope to meet Gadgeteer, except his parents don't let him go out after 10:00 PM. I've heard about Tall Vixen, but we haven't met yet."

"That's the tall acrobatic blonde girl, isn't she?" said Linda.

"So I've heard," said Cynic.

"Are you planning any super-feats while you're here?" asked Linda.

"I hope not," said Cynic. "Lawndale's kind of dull. I'd have to commute to Baltimore or Philly if I wanted to get into that stuff."

"How about Brockton Bay?" asked Linda.

Cynic's mask hid her facial expression, but her body language read "You've got to be kidding me" loud and clear. "No," she said.

The watch on Cynic's wrist, a high-end sports watch, started beeping.

"Sorry, my civilian identity is calling," she said. "I've gotta go." The girl turned away and started running.

"And that was Cynic, Lawndale's newest Cape," said Linda. "And I'm Linda Griffin from Lawndale's own KLWD-TV."

-(((O-O))-

This sketch came from The Paper Pusher Message Board, a Daria-specific fan site. I don't customarily write Worm fanfiction, but I couldn't resist.

SPOILERS:

The other Lawndale parahumans are:

Dark: Andrea Hecuba

Brainstorm: Jennifer Burns (burnout girl)

Gadgeteer: Ted Dewitt Clinton

Tall Vixen: Brittney Taylor

In this universe, red and white are Highland High School's school colors. Daria triggered there.