Disclaimer: I have many wishes. Owning this wonderful series is one of them. Unfortunately, most wishes don't come true, even if you wish on a million shooting stars.
A/N: Again, a special thanks goes out to my friend and fellow author, corn3ts, for hearing out this idea, and being the only one besides me who knows the actual plot twists. This is MAJORLY ALTERNATE UNIVERSE, Meaning, NO Beyblades and NO tournaments and all that hullaballo that goes with the canon Beyblade Universe. Please keep in mind that the characters meet under different circumstances and in effect, some might be terribly OOC. Oh, and if you didn't read the summary, this has YAOI. So for anyone who isn't a fan of that genre, please leave and indulge yourselves in a nice Max/Emily * shudders *. Thank you to everyone who reviewed 'Shattered', and I hope I get to see some you guys reviewing this as well.
A/N # 2: To the people who don't know, Jin is actually Takao's brother in the canon universe, and he will be appearing in the later seasons. In this fic however, he is KAI'S BROTHER. He will bear the name Hiwatari, and not Kinomiya. ( Thanks for the suggestion, corn3ts! ) That is all. Enjoy! ^__^
"Last embrace before dawn"
Let's say that I loved him. Take notice of the past tense. But it isn't what you would think. I still love him, and I find myself not capable of thinking of anything other than what he did to me.
I knew he returned every single shred of love I felt for him, but he broke my entire being. Sometimes, he knew it, sometimes, he was completely oblivious to the damaged shards of my heart. Each circumstance was something different, the intensity of the pain getting higher and higher with each time. How we first met was something that wouldn't be so conventional to typical love stories, especially considering our age gap. He was eighteen while I was thirteen, but that didn't stop me from openly admiring him. I can't say that I wore my heart on my sleeve, since I am not that kind of person at all. But I guess he changed me. Love does that to people, ne?
And now, I would never get him back.
Wait, I'm getting ahead of myself. Maybe you'd like to hear the beginning first.
As a child, I would say that I received lukewarm attention from the people who were supposed to love me the most. My mother was too preoccupied with her fancy garbs and high-heeled shoes, and whether she was late for the high-society parties she attended every week. My father, on the other hand, was a full-fledged workaholic who never failed to make money out of everything he did. My elder brother was not much of a good person, but he never really paid attention to me, either. We didn't do things that normal brothers did, like fishing, biking or checking out girls at the mall. In fact, the only person who I could say really gave a damn was my grandfather. And even then, he would give my brother much more of his time than he did for me. Sure, they gave me the best Christmas presents and sent me to the best exclusive for boys' school, but those things aren't exactly what I would envision to be love from them.
For them, it's more of an obligation. Sometimes, I feel like a nuisance, a pest to their otherwise perfect lives, just another mouth to feed and another body to clothe.
But I was willing to forget all of that, the day I saw him.
I remember it like it was yesterday. It seemed like the typical family vacation to a person who wouldn't look hard enough. The problem was, the Hiwatari Family isn't your average, loving family who played beach ball on the sand and barbecued meat on sticks. I was feeling disgusted at everything, to be honest. I had just listened to an hour's worth of my parents arguing over who should pay for the yacht they would be renting tomorrow. My lucky brother just managed to escape the madness because he's al ready nineteen, and isn't a miserable little 13 year old minor like myself.
Fortunately, I wasn't stupid enough to not find a way out of the hellhole I was in. I quickly found a way out by jumping out of my bedroom window, since it was only a few feet before I reached the solid ground. The moment my feet landed on the sand, I felt the distinct joy of freedom so longed for.
I wanted to savor the moment of being in this so-called island paradise. I don't even know how my brother managed to convince my parents to come to this stupid place. Maybe he threatened them that he would run away if they didn't come here, leaving no heir to the family fortune but liitle, ol' me. Of course, my wonderful mother and father would not like that at all. I let my lips curve into a dark, sardonic smile at the thought.
Hmph. People are still playing volleyball at this time. I thought people were now supposed to be resting after a hectic day of swimming and doing all kinds of beach-y stuff. Guess I was wrong. Oh well, it would do me some good if I loosened up the muscles in my feet and walk for a bit. Heaven knows that my rear was aching after being made to sit down in that crappy vacation home of ours. So I walk, and I think of all the sights that I see around me. A pretty sappy thing for me to do, ne?
I amuse myself briefly by looking back at my shoulder every once in awhile to glance at the footprints I imprint on the golden-brown hue of the sand. The sun seems to be going down to the sea every second, as it casts its red-orange glow all around the place. For a moment, I thought it was so beautiful, and so rare, since I never really looked at sunsets before this way. Looking around, I realize I was nearing the place where the people played beach volleyball with their makeshift net pitched on the sand. I better walk away, I thought to myself, before I—
For a second, I blacked out and before I knew it, I was already lying on the sand, groaning. The pain in my temple was excruciating, and was worse than any headache I ever had in the past. My right hand half-consciously comes up to my forehead while the other feels up the side for the culprit. It touches something round and smooth. Damn. It was the volleyball. I wanted to scream, but I couldn't.
An unfamiliar touch comes to rest on my right temple. My skin desperately tried to make sense of it, but it was something…someone new. My blurred vision looks up to find colors of ebony and gold dancing before it. I blink, trying to see clearly again, but to no avail, and the pain comes back to my skull.
"Oh, my God… I'm so sorry…" The voice above me murmurs, cool fingers caressing the skin of my forehead. Yes, keep doing that please…
"Can you stand up?" Aah… even in this state, my mind can make out the sounds of a masculine voice, tinged with what was obviously worry. I vaguely hear him ask again, and this time I was able to respond with a "Sort of". He nods, and puts his arms around my shoulders, slowly helping me get up.
"I'm really sorry. I'm glad you weren't hurt that much." He says, and I blink. Looking up at the taller figure, I wasn't surprised to find beautiful ebony hair cascading down his back. Bright, golden orbs stared back at me with wonder. He was…beautiful. Yeah, I know boys aren't supposed to be described as 'beautiful' or 'pretty', but 'handsome' wouldn't exactly fit the bill, since he didn't have overly masculine features.
With thoughts like those swimming in my head, It felt confusing, and I would be embarrassed to death if he saw even some vague sign of it. Girls never did much for my hormones, since I was almost always holed up inside our grand mansion back in Tokyo during night, and stuck in an all-boys' school by day. I never went out on dates or trips to the arcades with my 'friends' at the school ( who I think just suck up to me just because I'm one of the richest snobs there ).
He smiled down at me, and I couldn't control the heat creeping up to my cheeks. I must've looked like a total idiot because he suddenly laughed. Wow… he has a nice laugh, too…
I felt the urge to groan again as recognition of the yelling voice dawns in my head. Stupid Jin! Why did he have to ruin the moment?
With his arms still around me, the beautiful, black-haired boy glances towards the direction of Jin. I suddenly feel so… I don't know… loved? It was like being protected by those arms that were safely nestled around me.
My brother, my stupid killjoy of an older brother, runs towards us like he just caught fire in his pants. Now what was his problem? Did he come to ask me for a favor or something? Che, Jin never asked me for favors, since I never did, either. I wonder what he would want to make him come to me.
"Kai, I saw you being hit on the head with a volleyball. Are you okay, little brother? Is your head hurting? Don't you tell me that you have amnesia!" He rambles frantically. Oh gee, keep this up and I might actually believe that you care. If I suspect right… I pause in my thoughts to look at the person whom I was holding onto for support…. He might actually just be doing this for a chance to hit on this…siren beside me.
Kneeling in front of me, his hands suddenly grab my face, eyes darting back and forth to look for injuries. "Stop that, Jin!" I growl in irritation, and manage to pull his grubby hands away from me. He glares at me. "I was just trying to help, Kai." He hisses through clenched teeth. In a flash, his 'all-smiles' demeanor was back again and he stands up again. He brushes the sand off his swimming trunks, and looks straight at the eyes of my savior. "And who might you be?" He raises a questioning eyebrow, smiling in that toothy smile of his that makes me cringe everytime I witness it. I knew it! I knew he was in this 'I-care-for-you-little-brother' crap just to impress someone! That someone being the person holding me up. When we get back home, I will strangle you so badly, Jin!
My savior laughs melodiously. " Ore wa Kon Rei desu. And you?"
My brother makes a little gentlemanly bow. "Hiwatari Jin. It's a pleasure to see someone as lovely as you in this place, Rei-san."
Rei, as we now know him, smiled fondly at my brother when he kissed his hand. Why that flirt! The nerve of that guy! I'll show him!
"Thanks for saving me back there, Rei-san." I interrupt, smirking at Jin and turning back to give my most grateful smile to Rei. "It's all right, Kai-kun. I was the one who threw that volleyball in your direction, and it would be most rude if I didn't help you get up." To my utmost irritation, Jin and I both smiled even though the statement was obviously directed at me. "Now otouto-chan…I believe you have somewhere else to be. Like inside our vacation home, maybe?" Jin had this sickeningly triumphant grin on his face when he said that. If Rei weren't here, I would have knocked him out al ready. But he was right, I was dead if my parents found out that I had been sneaking out. The smarmy look on Jin's face clearly told me, "Get out now, and I won't tell."
With a resigned sigh and a polite bow to Rei, I pull myself together, and despite of my still-throbbing head, angrily stalk towards the vacation home. These are the times when I just want to throw my brother off the end of a cliff and live happily for the rest of my life knowing that his corpse is rotting in the deepest depths of hell.
The next few weeks of this vacation are spent in the company of my constantly annoying brother and his immensely beautiful that-it-really-hurts-to-look boyfriend. Yeah, you heard me right. My brother courted Rei with his flowery words and nifty gifts, and eventually he won his heart. Or at least I think so. I'm still hoping that Rei doesn't really like my brother in that way, and is just dating him because he got so irritated at his persistency.
Rei is a great person, and I always think that he doesn't deserve a slimy bastard like Jin, who I know is a playboy, and has had girlfriends and boyfriends that rival the amount of galaxies in the universe.
Still, it hurts to see them walk alongside the seashore, holding hands and watching the setting sun together. Me? I just watch in silence from the railing of our vacation house, feeling anger and hurt mix into one little ball inside of me. Watching them, and remembering the way that Rei held my hand, wordlessly assuring me that he was there to be with me. Those two ideas contrasted in my head, one in favor of me, and one for Jin. I didn't know what to think anymore. I just let jealousy rage through my veins, wishing, hoping that someday…
He would be mine.
Then that fateful day came, my virtual nightmare: The day he left me and all my dreams behind on that island.
The news came to me one afternoon when Jin asked me to help him pick of what to wear for… something. Naturally, I was really curious. I asked what was going to happen that he needed my opinion. He turned to me, and I was surprised to see a grim look on his face, like someone just died. "Ne, Jin…" I asked, actually feeling concerned for once. I've never seen him look like this before, so it really must be something. He turns to look at me and mumbles two words that made my whole world collapse before me.
I dropped whatever I was holding and asked him if it was true. He nods slowly, and his shoulders slumped. I grab the collar of his shirt, and turn him to face me. "Then why are you so depressed? It's not like you actually loved him, right? Wasn't he just another playtoy to you? Like the rest of them?"
"I…I loved him, Kai." His voice cracks, and moisture begins to form at the corner of his eyelids.
Figures. How can he not love Rei, when he was perfect?
I let go of his shirt. "You're pathetic, Jin." I snarl at him, feeling confused and fearful at the same time. I turn back and run towards the door to exit from all of this. I refused to believe it. I was a stubborn kid, and it just didn't register in my mind as 'fact'. I wanted to see Rei, to have him tell me that it wasn't true and it was all some sick joke of Jin's. I feel the rough texture of the sand at my bare feet as I walk around without giving any thought to my direction. My mind feels so hazy…
But a moment later, Jin comes and takes me to the shore. I ask him why, but he won't answer. Then, that's when I see it, A huge yacht parked on the shallow part of the seawater. Questions roam around in my head: Could this be it? Will I ever see Rei again? Why is my brother dragging me here? Could I be punished for this? Why are the clouds shaped that way? Some of them made absolutely no sense at all, but I couldn't care less now.
Jin lets go of me and my balance wavers for a brief moment at the loss of support. Gaining equilibrium, I see Rei embracing Jin, saying goodbye…
He's really leaving.
I tried to move, but my feet were frozen on the spot. C'mon Kai, get there and and say your good byes to Rei, thank him for being so understanding, for saving you… say that you love him, and can't bear to be without him. Move Kai, move!
When I snap out of my turbulent thought, it's al ready too late. The yacht is meters away from the shore, and a lone figure, my brother, stands there, waving and shouting his good bye. I run towards the shore to stand beside Jin and in a violent rush of emotion, scream out everything that I felt for him, not caring the slightest if Jin heard.
"Rei! Rei! No, please come back! Please don't leave me! Take me with you! Please…" I repeat it several times, like a holy mantra. My yells are swallowed by the waves of the sea, its movement mocking me, saying things that I wouldn't bother to comprehend. Will they take my pleas to Rei? Will he ever hear me? Will he ever know that this young, naïve soul he saved once loved him like no other?
Jin's hand descends upon my shoulder. "Let's go, Kai."
A small crab crawls over my feet and there is supposed to be a tickling sensation there, but my whole body strangely felt numb, even as the crab was kicked off by Jin.
We go home, sleep in our respective rooms and try to forget.
But I can't.
This memory is what I have of the very first time Rei broke my heart.
And fate would have him break it again and again and again.
To be continued…
Next chapter… ( If it ever sees the light of the day )
"I never believed in my dreams, but I suppose I was about to be proven wrong. After all these years, I would finally see him again; a long unfulfilled dream come true."
Yeah, I know what some of you are thinking, I do Rei-torture, so why am I doing Kai-torture? One word: Revenge. After reading 'Fool for Love' and 'Shattered', I know most of you are itching to kick Kai's ass! So basically, this story is dedicated to the readers of those two stories who want to free Rei from his suffering and see Kai experience the pain for once! =)
So… continue or not? Reviews always welcome! ^__^