Doom on Arrival

A/N: My partner has been playing Animal Crossing for what seems to be an eternity and I've just finished Doom Eternal, so I figured I'd write something the crosses over the two of them and bridges the gap betweent these awesome games.

"Demonic threat level five incoming." VEGA announced through the comm link, and right on queue a glowing, crackling portal appeared to the right of our bloodied protagonist.

"You will pay for what you did to the Makyr and our glorious..." The Maurader's words fell on deaf ears. To the Slayer, it was just another day, another death toll. He couldn't even count how many of the speeches he had heard by this point from whatever demigod or demon was next in line on his chopping block, but he knew exactly how they all ended. Their brain matter caked all over his suit.

Cleaning duty after the Icon of Sin had been going as smoothly as expected, if not smoother. I suppose after beating a literal demon god in a one vs hundreds fight would make any fight afterwards seem a bit trivial, though luckily for him the streets were still teeming with leftover demons for him to unleash his rage onto. The past few weeks had consisted of nothing less than an all-out demon massacre, and for once in recent existence he was beginning to notice the monotony of it.

Perhaps it was this apathy that caused Doomguy to miss the strange green glow coming from the portal, or the muddied armour of the ex-night sentinel readying its axe for combat. Either way, it would be a decision he would come to regret for a long, long time.

"...and so, I have come to seal you away for good, great deceiver!" The demon concluded, summoning its orange wolf minion and charging forward.

"Interesting choice of words." VEGA mused as the Slayer parried the strike with a super shotgun blast before swiftly turning and obliterating the minion with another, "I suppose taking it alive for interrogation is off the table?"

The subsequent unreserved heavy fire answered that question. After a quick minute of dodging and returning fire, the demon was brought to its knees. However, as it coughed up its ruined innards a smile crept to its face in lieu of the usual scowl. "My duty...is almost...complete..."

Preparing the final round of his weapon, Doomguy readied himself to finish this encounter and continue deeper into the city, but was caught off guard by an irregular leap attack. He realised only too late where the momentum was going to carry him, and as the two of them crashed through the portal his world turned from a dull red and black to a bright blue and green. They soared through the air for what felt like an eternity before crashing through a soft wall and onto a softer wooden table.

"Location...unknown..." The AI announced, crackling from the bad connection. "Downloading...copy...there. I am with you again, though my connection to my mainframe has been lost."

Doomguy grunted and kicked the Marauder off of him...straight through the small body of a human. A sickening crunch gave the impression that that human wasn't going to brush that wound off. The felled demon's eyes began to dull along with the glow of its axe, and it spat out its final words. "Welcome...to your...prison..."

"The portal has closed." VEGA told him, and the Slayer spun round to see the swirling mass of power blink out of existence. "Without connection to the Fortress I believe we are stranded, unless we can find a way to open and power a portal home."

The demon killer brushed the remaining debris off his praetor suit and took stock of his surroundings. It wasn't the first time he had been stranded on an alien world and with a track record like his he was sure he didn't want to take any chances. For all he knew the peach trees in the distance were demon egg spawners.

"Perhaps there is something inside the house that can help us?" The AI offered, and he glanced at the wreckage of what once was a modest but well-kept cottage. The table and north-facing wall were completely destroyed, and the home's previous owner was thoroughly crushed underneath the body of the demon invader. "A regrettable casualty."

Doomguy had made it a goal to try and involve neutral or peaceful being as little as possible, but sometimes in his line of work shit just happened. Lifting the mangled corpse up, he checked the pockets and clothing for any useful items they contained. A fishing rod, a spade, two stone axes and a red snapper later he tossed the carcass back into the rubble even more confused than when he started.

"It seems like a literal pocket dimension." VEGA chuckled to itself then analysed the equipment. "Primitive tools it seems, though the clothing indicates a more complex manufacturing process is available on this world." The Slayer tentatively held up the tatters of the red shirt. "I am doubtful they have it in your size." The slayer scowled and dropped it onto the floor, examining the rest of the room.

Before him was a strange array of fish in tanks, spiders in tanks and mismatched furniture. Doomguy was not sure if this was some sort of bizarre fashion statement or simply a housing facility for animal testing. Either way it unnerved him. That and the Groovy wallpaper and unmatching tiled floor.

"It appears the occupant of this home was depraved." VEGA noted, virtually shuddering somehow. "You can at least take solace in the fact that destroying this place somehow improved it. However, at least we can now confirm the existence of mass production, if also a lack of God."

A noise crept through from outside and the Slayer switched weapons to his plasma rifle. Taking cover to the side of the collapsed wall, he peered through the hole at the small crowd gathering outside. "Locals presumably. They do not appear to have weapons, or have any hostile intent. They are probably just curious about the commotion."

Keeping his rifle prepared, the enhanced human took a deep breath and went forth into whatever carnage was before him.

The villagers had heard the commotion earlier during the morning announcement from Tom Nook, though seeing the strange whirling hole in the air and hearing the crashes created from the two 'playing' giants they had decided to keep their distance. Mira the bunny and Flora the ostrich were the first ones to suggest that it may just be a new, albeit strange arrival to their home, while Del the crocodile and Tom the cat were the first to protest that no self-respecting animal would make that much of a commotion, especially not this early in the morning.

After a spirited debate as to what to do next, which was often interjected by Boomer the penguin's yawns, the group decided that it was best to be neighbourly and welcome their new neighbour to their town. And with that, the group slowly advanced towards the old villager's home with Isabelle the shih tzu tentatively at the head of the party, being flanked by Timmy and Tommy the tanukis in their uncle's stead, who had to leave to open up his store in time for business.

"H-Hello?" Isabelle called into the wreckage, scanning the broken home for any signs of people. "Oh, hi villager; we didn't see you over there! Is everything ok?"

The villager's lifeless corpse said nothing, its eye hanging loosely from its socket. "You look a bit sick!" Mira called in from the back, rummaging through her pockets as she moved through the others towards the building. "Here, if you need some medicine, we...GAH?!"

The small bunny was greeted with the barrel of a glowing plasma rifle, wielded by what to her seemed like a towering monstrosity of metal. "I would not approach any further."

"You sound like the shop's announcement system...system!" Timmy and Tommy asked, staring curiously at the humming hunk of metal. "Do you work for our uncle too...too?"

"I don't believe we work for anyone." VEGA told them, projecting his voice once again through the external microphone from the praetor suit. "Again, I warn you not to get too close. He does not react well to unknown entities, as seen by the corpses behind us."

Isabelle looked once again into the destroyed home and came to the logical conclusion that whatever 'corpses' were they were not pleasant. Like spiders. Or that wallpaper. "We are just checking on our friend after hearing the noise. I didn't spot them at the ceremony this morning and was wondering if they needed help with the house."

Something about the friendly tone made Doomguy's grip relax, and he lowered the weapon and stood up to his full height. "I think it is safe to believe that your friend won't be attending any more ceremonies for the foreseeable future..."

"Are they moving away?" Flora asked, a sad expression appearing on his face. "But why?! Was...was it something I said or...?"

"Yes yes...um...moving away. For no particular reason." VEGA answered hurriedly, not sure how the entire village of anthropomorphic creatures hadn't recognised the dead body behind them. Or the mutilated demon beside it. "We are here to...help pack. Apologies for the commotion, our other...friend needed to...sleep?"

"Sleeping on the job eh?" Boomer grinned from the background. "I like the guy. When he wakes up be sure to introduce me."

Doomguy glanced back to the lifeless mess that was the Marauder demon and smirked under his helmet. "He will be leaving soon too I'm afraid. Now, if you would be so kind would you be able to point us in the direction of the nearest warp gate or ship dock?"

The villagers scratched their heads. "There's Dodo airlines that fly to islands," Del answered, still scowling from the headache the ruckus had given him, "But I doubt your friend will have any nook miles to spare to spend on a trip like that for you after paying for these repairs."

"Plus, you don't seem like the kind of guy who has many...friends." Tom chimed in, wearily looking the mountain of a raging muscle before him up and down.

"N-Not that that's a bad thing!" Isabelle stepped in, sweat drops dripping from her face as she tried to diffuse the unpleasant situation. "We all start out not knowing any one, but we're all good friends now right?" The villagers nodded in unison and she turned to look up into the dull helmet of the newcomer. "S-So with that, we would like to welcome you to our town! I'm Isabelle and I'm the town secretary; nice to meet you!"

Doomguy looked downwards at her extended hand with surprise. Luckily, VEGA answered for him. "The suit is quite dirty so we will save your nice...paws from getting dirty. My name is VEGA and I am the built in AI from the Fortress of Doom. This Monstrosity of Death I am currently being used by is called Doomguy. Or Doom Marine. Or Doom Slayer. Or Harbringer of Death. Or..." The AI took a moment to read the room. "...Mr Doom for short."

"Our names are Tommy...and Timmy." The tanukis introduced themselves, smiling at him.

"Mira and Flora!" The girls gave him a friendly wave. "Nice to meet you Mr Doom."

"Boomer." The penguin grinned lazily, "If you need a great place to take a nap, I'm your guy."

"Tom." Tom told him, still curiously inspecting the hulking marine.

"Del." The crocodile said, folding his arms. "Now introductions are out of the way, how about you apologise for the commotion."

The other villagers, and Doomguy blinked at the sudden audacity of the crocodile. "Del... that's a bit rude for a first impression." Mira nudged his arm and gave him a disappointed look.

"Ugh fine, you get a free pass this time newbie." Del blushed, unfolding his arms and taking a deep breath before looking at our protagonist. "But keep your noise to a minimum from now on ok?"

Doomguy nodded as VEGA assigned each of the characters before him an accompanying name on his suit's HUD. Then, deciding not to push the luck of the small creatures, the AI stepped in once again. "I am afraid we need to continue packing for our friend's...travel. It was nice to meet you all."

"Nice to meet you too Mr Doom!" The villagers chanted as one, waving to their new friend before dispersing.

Isabelle, however, stayed for a moment longer. "If there's anything you or the other two need let us know, ok? You can find me in the town hall most days, or if I'm on a break at Nook's Cranny our local shop. See you soon around!"

As the tiny dog left his view, Doomguy and VEGA breathed a small sigh of relief. "It appears we are unsuspected. Now..." The marine looked from the dead demon behind him and back to the sunny, friendly world before him and cracked his knuckles, "Where shall we start?"