Rainy Days: An Epilogue

By Tione

Disclaimer: See the YYH staff in the corner? They belong to me. All mine. And no, they aren't cardboard… They just look like it.

A/N: No alternate ending. Sorry. Instead, it is called… an epilogue! Baka Gothic Kitsune gets a Hiei plushie that squeaks, "My sword is better than your rose whip!" cause she nailed the alternate ending/epilogue right on the head!

Tuxes. Dresses. Flowers, bouquets, churches, food, caterers, and stupid stupid rings. Insert a gasp, shudder, and scream of terror and you have my feelings about this situation.

I'm getting married. To the devil. I believe you might know who she is – the one and only Akira. See, a lot has happened in the year or so since I got together with Hiei. For one, our relationship has gone to a new level – not that you need to know about that! – and, well, my parents didn't really approve of Hiei. So they're forcing me to marry Akira despite the fact that I am absolutely flaming and it would be impossible to call me anything but gay.

And you don't even have to tolerate their stupidity.

Now, I don't know much about weddings but I can tell this one isn't normal. I could tell the fat bastard and human stick (aka Akira's parents) had probably hurried it.

Oh, god, I'm going to throw up. I'm at the alter right now. They skipped most of the ceremony. Like the bride and bridesmaids walking down the aisle. Apparently, Akira's having trouble with her "dress" (cough – RAG – uncough) and they've put it on hold. Which gives me more time to be absolutely ill.

There are pigeons in my stomach, I swear. How the hell am I going to get out of this one? I can see Yusuke and Kuwabara in the pews but they don't look the least bit worried. In fact, they look… amused. Why the hell do they look amused?!? This isn't funny! Funny is Yusuke getting hit by three tons of peanut butter or Kuwabara getting stabbed repeatedly with a water bottle but spending the rest of your life with Satan isn't!!!!

Right. Calming down.

And suddenly there's Akira in front of me wearing something exceedingly white and the preacher has started talking and he's looking at me expectantly and where the hell did the rest of the mumbo jumbo go?

My throat is so dry, I don't think I can talk and I'm trying to swallow but it feels like there's a bunch of cotton in my mouth and –

Suddenly, a wave of Hiei's ki rolls over me, like grape jelly, and it's so reassuring, that I say "yes" without even thinking of what the consequences will be and I find that I don't particularly care.

Distantly, I note that the preacher (otherwise known as That Old Person) has turned towards Akira and she's answered him. And I hear him say, "And you may kiss the bride." My brain kicks in.

Oh shit. Ohshitohshitohshitohshit. I just married Akira. I just MARRIED AKIRA.

My hands are moving on their own accord, towards the veil, and then they're lifting it up and the face I see isn't Akira's face.

It's Hiei. He looks kind of annoyed – I would be too if I had to wear a dress – but he looks… pretty. Disturbing thought, yes, but he did.

Instead of letting me sit there and stare at him in shock all day, he leans up and gently kisses me as people clap. Now I understand why Yusuke and Kuwabara looked so amused. He breaks away and smiles softly at me and I smile back as my heart melts into a puddle of Hiei-goo.

So what'd you do with Akira? I asked him joyfully. His eyes crinkled at the corners as he noted the blissful expression on my face.

Oh… you know… just locked her in a closet somewhere... he replied cautiously. I sent him a look that clearly said thank-you-so-much-because-I-would've-fed-myself-to-sharks-if-you-hadn't-done-that.

We turned to leave and it was then that the Tachikawa's and my parents got a good look at "Akira."

Let me tell you, I've never seen a fat man run that fast.

As we ran laughing for the door (at least, I was laughing. Hiei had his hand on his katana and was growling threateningly), one thought circulated through my head over and over.

I'm married to Hiei!!!

So it's over. For real this time. ;; I think this is more conclusive than the last chapter was, thank god. I'm gonna miss you guys and I want to thank you for being such supportive people and –

Okay, enough with all the sappy stuff. Now that I've really completed Rainy Days, I'm going to throw myself into working on The Summoner. That one is a bit more serious and definitely has more plot than this… Ha!

Much luff!