HEY!!! I'm back!!!

"The Great Lick-A-Thon" by Twilight The Umbreon


Twilight: It's a beautiful day in the mysterious Ibex forest, perfect for today's extreme event. Yes, its the match-up between Yoshi and our very own homegrown hero, Lickitung in the grrrrreeat LICK-A-THON!!! (cheering heard in the background) I'm your host, Twilight The Umbreon, giving you live, as it happens, non-stop coverage of this exciting, thrilling event! Now let's meet our two eager competitors, Yoshi and Lickitung!!!

A female, green yoshi and a large lickitung wearing a black shirt with in big yellow letters on the back "Gotta lick'em all" walk in front of the camera, smiling and waving.

Twilight: Ok, first we will talk to the competitor voted to win the Lick-A-Thon...Yoshi!!!

Lickitung looks annoyed as camera zooms on Twilight and Yoshi

Twilight: Right. So Yoshi, where do you hail from?

Several contented sounds comes from Yoshi.

Twilight: Translator!!!

Electronic Translator beeps.

Translated Yoshi: From Yoshi Island, silly!

Twilight: What do you enjoy?

Yoshi: Melons!!!

Twilight: Ok...anything else?


Twilight: Righto then, have you got any hobbies yosh...Ow! Leave my ear alone, Lickitung...Ok, let me start again...you got any hobb...Ow! Quit it Lickitung, just leave my ears alone...ok, lets try again, Havce you got any hobbies, Yosh...OOOWWW!!! GODAMN IT!!!

Twilight twirls around and sinks his teeth into Lickitung's tongue!

Lickitung: OOOOWWW!!! (Runs around in pain and bashes into trees)

Twilight: Serves him right for flicking my ears with his tongue. Ok, where were we??? Ah yes! Tell us, Yoshi, do you enjoy any hobbits er... I mean hobbies

Yoshi: Hobbits...Yeah!! I just loooove Frodo Baggins...he sooooo cute!!!

Twilight: Umm...excuse me?

Yoshi: And Sam, and Merry and...

Twilight: I didn't say hobbits, I said hobbies.

Yoshi: It sounded like you said hobbits...

Twilight: Well... I did say hobbies...

Yoshi: Ok, hobbies...

Twilight: Yes, please tell us...

Yoshi: I just love eating!!! And taking care of my eggs.

Twilight: Eggs???

Yoshi: Yeah, they're my babies, they are. I just wish I had a strong, hammmesoommmeee, male yoshi to take care of them...(Stares longingly at Twilight)

Twilight: (with sweat-droppy thing) Ok...

Yoshi: Hey! I know! How about you join me to take care of my babies?

Twilight: But, I'm an umbreon!!!

Yoshi: You can become a yoshi, anyone can.

Twilight: Errr...I'll think about it...

Yoshi: (doing the puppy dog eyes thingy) Come on...

Twilight: Only if you lose.

Yoshi: (crestfallen) Oh...alright...

Twilight: That's settled then...so, Yoshi, anything you wish to say to your fans out there?

Yoshi: Yes, Embrace the yoshi within you all. And don't forget to always eat your melons!!!

Twilight: Thank you for your time, Yoshi.

Yoshi: The pleasures all mine.

Twilight: Now over to our own home-grown lickin' hero, lickitung!

Camera focuses in on Lickitung. It zooms in until there is a thump as the camera hits Lickitung in the head.

Lickitung: Owww...Goddamn camera...zoom out, you stupid hunk of worthless garbage.

Voice Inside Camera: (Sobs) That's not nice! You hurt my feelings!

Camera zooms out a little, then zooms in at lightning speed. There is a much louder thump as the camera connects with Lickitung's head, then zooms out.

Lickitung: I hate you, stupid video camera...

I tap Lickitung on the shoulder with my ear.

Twilight: A-hem...

Lickitung: What?

Twilight: Apolagize to the camera.

Lickitung: I don't have to.

Twilight uses scary face! Lickitung looks scared stiff.

Twilight: Now will you apolagize to the camera?

Lickitung: (in a small voice) Yes...

Twilight: Good...now DO IT!

Lickitung apolagizes meekly to the camera.

Voice Inside Camera: Well, its about time!

Twilight: So lickitung, what do you think your chances of winning are?

Lickitung: Definitly 100%

Twilight: (Eyes light up in amazement) 100%! How come your so confident?

Lickitung: (smiles) If i can hit your ears from several metres away without even straining, then what ten metres to me???

Twilight: (gives Lickitung a dark look) Indeed...

Twilight: (continues) Now, we must move to a commerical break, and when we get back, the first event, long-distance licking shall begin.

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Well long time, but I finally got something done. Woohoo!!!