Disclaimer: First Chapter
Story Start!

"Come on Elmenhilde, wiggle those hips with me!"

"I don't get why we need to do this... I hate this."

Naruto and Elmenhilde were working up a sweat as they worked to finish the newest potion that he thought up after a long train ride to the next country. Now they were inside of an abandoned hospital, standing side by side and wiggling their hips with potion bottles strapped to their sides.

"Tap... tap tap tap. tap... tap... tap tap tap. tap." Naruto repeated the speed that they needed to do the hip wiggle, which the the way that the potion needed to be shaken. "This potion doesn't get stirred, it gets shaken. Shaken!"

Naruto was sweating bullets just like her.

25 hours they had been shaking their hips to shake all of the potions, and they were almost done with the shaking process. Keeping the same beat the entire time without taking breaks was the hard part, and he really needed to pee. Hip shaking and the need to pee didn't go together very well, the second the potion turned red, he would be extremely happy.

"What does this potion even do... explain that... I hate this."

"You'll find out when I summon Cerberus to test it on... fuck this sucks..." Naruto hated this just as much as she did, but he was determined to see the potion through to the end. Naruto saw the second that the potion was done, and stopped what he was doing. He ran over to the window and pulled the front of his pants down.

No waiting.


"Suck it up, and stop shaking your hips... good, now we just add the cerberus hair... and... done." Naruto stated as the red potion turned black. He pointed at the ground outside of the hospital, and a summoning circle appeared. His time in hell building his theme park had given him the chance to find a cerberus to summon.

Elmenhilde wasn't shocked or even freaked out when she saw a massive three headed black dog get summoned next to the building they were in. Naruto took the potions from her and added the hair to them as well.

"What does this potion do?"

"There are tons of monsters with multiple heads... this potion transforms heads into different bodies, severing them from the original body... I thought about feeding it to a Dullahan to see if it would make their head grow a new body... but then I thought-" Naruto poured the potion into the triple headed demon dog's mouth.


Tons of blood as the heads SHOT off of the dog's body and turned all three necks into blood fountains. The severed heads started to shrink down and morph into a more humanoid form, their black fur falling off.


"Ah indeed... 3 bodies, but only 1 of them has a penis... weird."

The three heads turned into 3 bodies, but 2 of those bodies had no genitals at all, while the middle head actually had a penis. They had perfectly identicle bodies other than that fact though, they had more cute shota-like bodies, and smooth black hair on top of their heads. The whites of their eyes were black, and their eyes burned bright red. Other than the fact that they had dog tails, their legs were humanoid-shaped, fur covered legs ending in paws, and they had dog ears on top of their heads, they looked very human.

They jumped up to the window and landed inside of the building.

In perfect unison.

"... Ah... I see now... you possess the means of reproduction, you possess a soul, and you have a brain." Naruto looked between the three of them, and saw a small different between them. One had the light of intelligence, the other had soul filled eyes, and the final had a penis.

Intelligent thought.
Reproductive instinct.
Heartfelt intuition.

They were still a single body, seperated into three bodies, but still connected and unable to properly function without each other.

"They are NAKED!"

"Don't be such a prude... but I guess you have a point..." Naruto pointed his fingers at them.

Brain was dressed in a business suit.
Reproductive was dressed in a butler suit.
Heart was dressed as a magical girl.

"That one doesn't make sense."

"It makes all of the sense in the world... you see... smart, hard working, and adorable... all of them are my adorable babies now... it takes a lot of hard work to be in charge of reproduction." Naruto pointed to the one in the buttler suit.

"NO, the magical girl doesn't make sense!"

"... I don't see the problem." Naruto deadpanned as he looked, and he scratched his chin. "Cer... Ber... and Us... their names... actually they are a single person split into 3 bodies, so does one name still work... questions for later. For now, their name is Trips." Naruto would do with that name for now.


"... HIS name is Trips, still one person, just 3 bodies." Naruto scratched the back of his head in thought. "... and off you go." Naruto put his new creation to sleep, and allowed them to be absorbed by a bottle. Once they were needed, or once he was back home, he would release them from their sleep and introduce them to Sly and Sly Jr.

Good doggos needed to spend time together after all.

"... Is that the only reason we made this pit stop?"

"No, we're near the Vatican right now, and I promised Irina to pick up her clothes and the last Excalibur sword if I had the chance." Naruto was going to fulfill his promise to Irina at the very least, since he DID have the chance to do so. "This will be fun... maybe I should break into Heaven while I have the chance... I wonder if there are any materials from God still there." Naruto had full plans to see if he could find a way into Heaven, without having to rely on using magic.

He preferred not to use magic to collect stuff if he could help it, but sometimes it just couldn't be avoided.

"What even is your end goal?"

"... Having fun?" Naruto stated, but his tone didn't suggest that he was telling the entire truth. She didn't push further, since she would have to stay by his side anyway. She was in the position of being the only female vampire now, if she didn't stay with somebody strong then her life was either over, or her life as a free person was over.

She was stuck like this, she would need to follow Naruto until the day that she was no longer forced to fear for her safety.

"Whatever, I guess your reason for being a pervert doesn't matter."

'Other than distort reality to allow my parents to be revived, and survive, I really don't gave a goal outside of that... I mean, making hentai monsters is fun.' Naruto put his hands in his pockets and walked towards the exit of the building. 'I've already created world peace among the human population... I should ask Loki the next time he pops up if there is anything fun to do besides monsters and pranks.' Naruto hopped out of the window and landed on the grass.

Elmenhilde glided down after him, landing a lot more softly than he could ever land naturally.

She stopped.

"Do you smell that..."

"I don't have super senses."

"... Nevermind... it seems that vampire hunters are chasing me." Elmehilde stated as she unleashed the nearby shadows. She would have killed the hunters chasing her, but she heards shouts of shock and horror before she could do the deed.

Naruto had dumped seeds on the ground, and poured potion over then, causing tentacle plants to grow quickly and spread out over the area. The hunters were caught where they were hiding, and Elmenhilde covered her mouth in shock when she saw male and female hunters getting fucked by tentacles.

"Killing people is such a brutish, and unneeded thing most of the time. It's a lot more fun to make them live to regret their choice, just like how there is a devil that thinks he can be a sneaky boy and rape Asia while I'm gone." Naruto stated with a chuckle.

"Your girlfriend... you left her alone, even knowing there is a rapist after her... what did you do?" Elmenhilde asked with a raised eyebrow.

Live to regret their choice.

Naruto grinned a sadistic grin.

"I've been plotting this one for awhile now, at first I thought to just torture and kill him... but then I realized... a better solution. Asia's body has been infected with a potion of mine, if any humanoid being rapes her... they will become a woman... permanently... being turned into a woman while surrounded by hentai monsters is something that scumbag will live to regret." Naruto laughed at his plot.
Note: Asia drank a potion to turn Rapists into women, aka, she knows about the plan.

"... That plan relies on him raping your girl though."

"Exactly, if he rapes her, then he doesn't have the right to complain about what happens to him after. That nut will be the last nut he ever busts, and after that, he will spend the rest of his life forever reminded of the fact that did this to himself... and that is when I'm going to have my personal revenge... yes... then it gets personal."

"I never want to piss you off." Elmenhilde stated with a deadpan. Naruto wasn't just dangerous to his enemies, he was dangerous to his allies as well.

Naruto seemed to read her mind.

"I'm a Mage Elmenhilde, you need to remember we don't follow the same morals. For us Mages, the end justifies the means normally. I don't care if Asia has sex with others, but the second somebody tries to steal her from me... that crosses a line. There is another reason I will let him rape her... to humiliate him."

"You will humiliate him... by letting him have sex with... ooooooooh." Elmenhilde got it.

Naruto grinned.

"Asia's not as tight as she used to be, and I've seen that boy. The only people he has ever had sex with were virgin holy women that he raped, he didn't break them with skills. He broke them by forcing them to abandon God, by robbing them of their chastity and humiliating them. There was no skill or size involved... but Asia's not a virgin, and she has had sex with literal sex monsters AND me... that punk will be humiliated by how loose I've left Asia for him... his mind will be plagued by the thought of just how big was that guy... and as he turns into a woman with that thought in his mind, the transformation won't just be physical... I'll have planted a seed of doubt in his mind." Naruto pointed to the side of his head. He grinned a dark, happy, but completely demented grin at the thought of being able to completely break his enemy both physically and mentally.

This person caused Asia to get kicked from the Church in the first place, and now he was trying to take what was his.

You did not try to steal from a Mage, very simple words to live by. Stealing from a mage who focused on making potions and monsters to fuck with people wasn't smart, stealing from a mage who would be more than happy to make sure that you faced punishment for every crime you've ever committed was even worse.

"How do you even know this is going to happen?"

"Because, he's been sending his little maids to look for weaknesses in my defenses. I told Xenovia and Irina to allow him to discover a couple of weak points, and my monsters all know to allow him to think he can get to Asia... I've been baiting him for months." Naruto had been doing this long term, no desire at all to hold back.

Elmenhilde licked her lips.

This dark and twisted revenge story was getting her a little hot under the collar, she had to admit that Naruto's plot to really cause as much pain as possible to this guy just did things for her.

Killing a person ended their suffering.

"Of course, if he decides not to rape Asia, then I'll allow him to get off without punishment... from me at least. I don't care about those other nuns enough to get revenge for them, and I'm not in the business of being a hero of justice." Naruto had no desire to seek out punishment for others when he had no personal stake in the matter. He was more than happy to live his own life, and not worry about others.

Enough revenge talk.

Off to the Vatican!

The Holy Sword awaits.

Chapter End!
Please Leave Me Lots of Nice Long Reviews, But No Flames Please!

1. Not enough desires.
Since not enough people stated things they waited to see during the Corruption Arc, I'm postponing that Arc until enough people have stated what they wanted to see during it.

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This is a link to my discord, which will have a lot of secrets about the story, and other stories as well. Including behinds the scenes, and me telling everyone what I plan on updating next.
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