Disclaimer:I don't own fuckin anything. If you paid someone to read this, then you have just been Royaly Screwed(and not in the fun way whatsoever). Bethesdia owns Elder Scrolls and Type-Moon owns Nasuverse. Alrighty then. In the great hymn of Zohan, I speak thee lyrics of awesome. ~YEEEAHDEEDUUH…YEEEAHDEEDUUH…YEEEAHDEEDUUH...YEEEAHDEEDUUH, "De Zohan"!~

Shirou Emiya-Daedric Prince of the Heroic Forge

Chapter#3:Paarthurnax laughs and Alduin gets stoned

If someone told her in her previous life that she would be reborn as a dragon, love her sister, not treat her now Mal Dovah Kulaas as a tool, and finally NOT be in a world with a meddling wizard of flowers, she would have most likely laughed in their face, blasted them to oblivion" which is now a thing…*snorts* ", and conjure a throne to sit her sexy ass down in, with a glass of wine in hand, just to contemplate just how much of a complete dumbass said person was." looks like the joke's on me now" It's been countless centuries since Her now little Briinah was banished through time by the Kel, obviously the idiot dovahkins did not know what the hell they where doing or playing with. The reason for her rebeling against her sister in the first place is because her sister eventualy went down the same damn path she went in her previous life. The only diference is, Merlin is not in this world so he or she can't fuck with their lives " thank you big daddy Akatosh" and that when the humans finally betrayed her…she snapped. It was bloody. And heart wrenching. Not even their daughter could stop her in her rage. Long story short, Paarthurnax AKA Morgan former Le Fey now Pendragon had taught humans how to speak and use her race's native tounge. And after Briinah's banishment by the Kel, Only the greybeards and a young Dovahkin eventually named by her(Ysmir)managed to not abuse her teachings and fuck everyone over in pointless fucking wars and struggles for kingship or slaughters of countless innocents when taking over said kingdoms of power. In the end… she got sick of it. Her daughter wasn't far behind her.

So now we find Paarthurnax [Think Caster Morgan La Fey, only with a cross between her's and Salem's(From RWBY)type of dress and hairstyle]next to the time wound, sprawled out horizontally across an ornate throne that is more like a comforter with a stone frame, staring at the tamrielian sky, long and sexy legs kicking up in the air, and bored out of her fucking mind. As emphasized by said dragonlady, who now said;"IIII'mm sooo fucking boooorrred. When the hell are you gonna get out of that stupid Miiraak you Golden Eyed Beautiful Bit-"And then there is a giant green flash. And out the time tear spat…Alduin in all her Golden Eyed Dragonic glory…Crashing into the mountain peak beside her. Morgan promptly vibrated off her throne and started rolling around in the snow, voice howlin in the wind, holding her gut, legs flailing up a cloud of snowdust, and laughing her pretty ass off.

Alduin AKA Arturia Pendragon(Alter) dragged herself out of the now destroyed moutain peak, opening and then narrowing her eyes at her younger(not anymore, HA!)Briinah's now recovering form. Said sister started standing up, still shaking and struggling to hold in her laughter. She straightened herself out, dusted off the snow on her dress, and cast a minor heating spell to burn away the moisture from her clothes. She the proceeded to sit herself in her throne much like the Jarls do in a certain video game that's related to this fic.

"Turi! What took you so long to get your dragonic ass out of the time wound? Heh, I thought you got lost and had to ask for directions to the moutain top you just slammed into(Alduin just growling at her)…but it looks like you found your way to it's chilling rocky embrace. Good for you."Arturia then acknowledged her by raising her scaly head and telling her in most calmest and straitfaced way she could, to go fuck herself with the pointy end of said ruined montain peak. Morgan chuckled at her response.

She then conjured up a cow or a dozen for her as a peace offering, which was torched and then EATEN. After all…" Hunger is the Enemy". Morgan just sat there with a hand on her chin, and mentally responding as if her ravenous Briinah actually spoke those words," you must get a lot of enemies Briinah". After Arturia got done devouring her smoked cows, she then started to take stock of her surroundings. Then tilted her head at her sister in obvious confusion. After all, they were enemies just before those idiot Joors used that blasted Kel to send her hurling through a wormhole for what looked to her like minutes, before crashing into a wall of stone and snow. And then was offered food. Oh and she can't see any fellow Dovah setting everything on fire. Or Dovahkins Shouting at their winged kin. Or the corpses. Or fire. She was thoroughly confused. Though she isn't hungry anymore…for now.

Morgan couldn't help but snicker at her sister's adorable expression. It was like a giant winged puppy wondering why you are making that funny sound. Or that it doesn't understand what command you're trying to give it. She shook her head at Scaly Puppy picture she now has stuck in her mind, and proceeded to explain her actions and the events that followed her departure from the battlefield. Arturia calmly laid her head on the snowy ground and listened to what her Briinah had to say about her current situation. She lost. But on the bright side, she doesn't have to worry about traitorous subjects or rebellious dovahs trying to ursurp her rule. She's free. It was after they started getting done catching up that they both felt something they haven't felt in a long time.

" I am the Bone of my Sword "

Magecraft. Akin to to the feeling of the Realm of a Daedric Prince but instead of a link being established between their Realm of Oblivion and Nirn, it was forcefully manifesting and overwriting the world's spacial area it is currently emerging in. And one of the sisters had a much more evident response.


Alduin lept up, careened forward towards the edge, and dove strait down, divebombing like a damn bloodcrazed murderous hawk, soaring strait to the origin of the presence she felt, eyes going in slits filled with tears..and fury. Whoever caused her husband/mate to trigger his Reality Marble is gonna get fried, flash frozen, and ripped the fuck apart by this angry dragon queen…personally.

Morgan was left standing there, wondering what the hell got into her sister, when she(conveniently)had a flashback of holding her sister in her own bed, breaking down and crying after a few hundred years. More specifically the reason why she broke down in the first place., "I miss my mate…I miss Shirou."and outright howling in laughter, pitying the dumb assholes who dared endanger her mate. She's been hoping and praying for a long damn time for our father to send Shirou over to their new world, and whoever is the one that puts that reunion in Jeopardy won't live long enough to regret whatever dumbass had done that and had put them into that situation in the first place. Dragons are extremely territorial especially when something threatens their treasures or loved ones…and some idiot(s) did both… at the same time. "Whoever this Shirou guy( " …or dragon*fingers crossed* )is, I hope he isn't squeamish about outright slaughter or possible eating of people". She spoke aloud to no one in particular. Well there is one thing she knows for sure…somebody's getting laid.

She promptly started laughing in her throne and not giving a fuck about some already warm waking corpses. After a few minutes of busting her gut at her Mal Briinah's expense, she then stood up and looked towards the sky. And shouted:


((Aaand back to Alduin)) Arturia is hurling herself through the skies like a dragon possessed. She litteraly just exploded a bird when it flew in her path, then proceeded to show it how to fuck off. Violently. She just made it to a tower in the general area of where she felt the magic signature and looked around for any signs of fighting. And damnnear got whiplash when she saw her husband kneeling on the ground with some guy with an axe. She looked in his eyes and he looked in hers(confused as hell, but he looked). The first thought when she got in front of him and peered into those hetrochromatic eyes was simple. "DII(MINE)! "

Ok , chapter three is finally done. And yes, Paarthurnax is Morgan La Fey. And no, Merlin the Wizard of Flowers is not Paarthurnax. And yes, Odahviing is Mordred Pendragon the Knight of Passion/Betrayal(For those of you who guessed it, congrats! Here's a cyber cookie. Yum.). And yes, I realize this is a story on crack. And no, I don't care. I find all your reviews awesome and hillarious. It encourages me to keep going. Anywhos… Let me know what you think.