A/N: Read GTH on Deviant Art up to Ch 11 for context.
"Ah. Welcome. So you're the Caulifla from a different universe," Kronk says.
"Uh, yeah. Weird to know that there are other versions of me, but whatever."
Kronk chuckles. "You get used to it. So, what can ol' Dr. Kronk help you with?"
Caulifla sighs as she sits down. "I... might be destroying a marriage by accident."
"Ooooh. This one will be a dozy."
"Yo, what's gucchi in your girl's- Wha- CAULIFLA?!"
"Hey, Slick," Kronk goes.
"Uh, who the hell are you," Caulifla asks.
"Who a- Who am I?! Aw, nah. Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. You're not pulling that card, Caulifla."
"I'm serious. Who are you, and why do you look like my boyfrie-" Caulifla shakes her head. "Why do you look like my teacher in a fur coat and lame jacket?"
"OH, HELL NAH! YOU DID NOT JUST DIS THE DRIP! NOW I KNOW YOU AIN'T MY CAULIFLA!"
"Heh, you wish I was yours."
"Girl, do you want me to knock you upside the head?"
Caulifla cracked her knuckles. "Bring it, Queen Kong."
"Ooooooh, this girl's asking for it."
"Now, hold on! Everyone calm down," Kronk went.
"Doc, who is this Wannabe Goku and what is he doing here?"
"I OWN THIS BUILDING, LIL' GIRL!"
"Oh, great. I'm paying a guy who's pretending to be the only man I've ever respected. Just great."
"Girl, you're gonna GIVE me your respect. I AM THE SLICKEST OF GOKUS!"
"I mean, Caulifla, you just found out there are other versions of you. You really think there aren't going to be other versions of your boyfriend?"
"Boyfriend," Slick asked.
Caulifla then did her famous blush. "HE'S NOT MY BOYFRIEND!"
"That was loud," Slick went.
"Alright, with Slick here, we might be able to make some progress," Kronk said.
"Hol' up, why am I a part of this?"
"Yeah. He's nothing like the Old Man I know."
"Like I wanna be anything like that hillbilly." A Ki Blast rushed past Slick's head.
He glanced at the impact with a surprised look before looking at a very angry looking Caulifla. "Insult him like that again, and the next one won't miss."
Kronk laughed. "Not your boyfriend, huh? You seem to care about him enough to want to keep people from insulting him."
Caulifla crossed her arms with a blush. "He's my friend and someone I respect. I pretty much see him as a member of my crew. You don't insult my crew. If you do, I'll beat you black and blue."
The men looked at Caulifla.
"Damn. I think I like this girl," Slick said.
"Not on the market, big guy."
"Not like that."
"Good. You're not my type anyway."
"Not your- Whoa. Never thought I'd hear that shiz. How are my protagonist powers not working on this girl?"
"Because I AM a protagonist."
Caulifla sighed. "Kronk explained it to me. I'm the protagonist in my universe along with Goku. It might explain the trouble I'm causing, but I still want to clean up my mess before it gets too bad. I only went to Goku to get stronger, not ruin his crappy marriage."
"Well, sorry to break it to you, Caulifla, but that might be the case," Kronk said.
"Aren't you supposed to help me?"
"I am. You need to understand that some things are just unavoidable. When a protagonist has a certain role, they have to follow through. It may not be pretty and they may not like it, but they gotta d0 what the writer says. What's your story like?"
"You want to know my story?"
"I'd like to know as much as you can tell."
"It's not complete, you know."
"Ah, don't worry. A lot of stories are incomplete."
Caulifla sighed again. "Fine. Got a computer?"
"Right here," Kronk said as he took out his laptop.
Caulifla walked up, signed into Deviantart and found the page.
"Chumpchangedraws," Slick asked. "Is that me... FIGHTING WITH SUPERMAN?! AW, HELL NO!"
"Quit your bitchin'," Caulifla went with a glare before finding the GTH folder and sitting down. "Read to your hearts content," she said with a wave.
"Uh-huh. You two mind waiting outside while I read this," Kronk asked.
"Why do I gotta go," Slick asked.
"Slick, I'm just asking you to wait outside while I study this. I need all the information I can get, and I work better when alone. You know, no Yzmas or Kuscos or Red Her-"
"A'ight! A'ight. I got it. No way am I gonna be compared to Red Hero," Slick said as he left the room.
"Enjoy," Caulifla said as she left after Slick.
Dr. Kronk took the next several minute to look over the highlights of GTH. While he was catching up, Caulifla and Slick were leaning against the wall in the hallway, Caulifla looking out of the building window. Slick began taking sips from a bottle of Senzu Lean he keeps on his person.
Caulifla glanced at him when he took out the bottle. "This is a very weird sight. Goku drinking alcohol."
Slick offered the bottle over to Caulifla, "Try it. this the good shiz. You don't have anything like it in your universe, because it's EXCLUSIVE to mine."
Caulifla, letting her guard down for a moment, took the bottle and takes a sip. " Don't get any ideas, here. I'm only doing this because my Goku doesn't drink." Caulifla then takes a second sip, then offers it back to Slick.
"Yeah, most Gokus don't. It's not good, but I'm the best, so I do what I want." Said Slick, as confidently as he always is.
"You've got a healthy opinion of yourself. Can't see why when you're drinking weak liquor and bragging about it."
Slick winced at her words, bringing the bottle to his lips, only to find the bottle was empty. "WHAT THE FUNG? YOU OVER HERE TALKING SHIZ BUT YOU FINISHED THE WHOLE THING IN TWO SIPS! HOW?!" Slick threw the bottle to the ground, naturally shattering it.
"Please, the alcohol on Planet Sadala would kill you if this is what you're used too."
Slick then considered following up on this threat to knock her upside her head, but instead, he hesitated, impressed with this Caulifla. "You know what? I do like you. you're nothing like the Caulifla I know. "
"Well, what's so wrong about her?" Asked Caulifla, genuinely curious about her counterpart.
"Well, My Caulifla is always trying to smash. She never turns it off. I'm not messing around with that. I'm married. She disses me, she talks all sorts of shiz about my wife, she stalks me and crashes parties. She's a damn menace oh and her voice is way different.
Caulifla nodded, "This all sounds familiar. How old is this me?"
Slick paused "AHHHHHH, I don't know for sure, but she's gotta be early 20s?"
Caulifla rolled her eyes "That explains it. Give her a few years. She'll chill out, probably"
Slick raised his eyebrow. "You sound like you know what you're talking about."
Caulifla nodded. "And you said you're still with Chi-Chi?"
Slick nodded back. "Yeah, I mean I'm always getting caught up with some random females, but it is what it is. I love my wife, end of story."
"Well, Slick, if your Caulifla is anything like me, she's gonna grow out of that attitude. And once she does, you'd better be careful..."
"Hey, you two! breaks over! We have a lot to discuss. Come on back inside" Said Kronk over the loud speaker.
"Careful of what? " Asked Slick.
"Well, part of my problem is that I'm causing all this harm without really trying. My Goku and I are very close. Once she starts getting serious, she just might steal you away just as easily."
"HA! As if! I have an iron will. The effect may have a mind of its own, but I'm Slick Goku. I run my shizz,"
"Whatever. Let's get this over with"
Slick Goku and Caulifla step back into Kronk's office.
"Alright, Doc. Lay it on me."
"I gotta say, Caulifla... you've got an interesting story."
"Thanks. But I'm not here for praises."
Kronk laughed. "Thought not. Still, it was pretty complicated. I see what you're going through. You went to Universe 7 to train with Goku."
"And I honestly wouldn't mind trainin' this Caulifla. She's alright," Slick said.
"As I was saying, you went to train. Learn new moves. Gain new powers. The works. But things started to get... spicy the more time you spent with Goku. Now, it's not all your fault. Goku isn't exactly innocent in this either."
"He IS innocent. I'm the one who read signs that weren't even there."
"Ah-ah-ah, now you're just trying to protect him. Taking all the blame. It's admirable that you're owning up to your mistakes. Seeing your flaws. Admitting to your failures. Not a lot of people can do that. Slick here has that problem himself."
"Now-now-now, hol' up. What you trying to say, Kronk."
"This isn't about you, Slick. We're here for Caulifla."
"You can't just dis me like that and expect me not to-"
"If you shut up right now, I'll treat you to some Sadalan booze. You know, the stuff you're too much of a lightweight to handle," Caulifla says with a sassy smile.
"Ooooooooh, you's a bitch. Why do I like that?"
"I'm just I likeable bitch," Caulifla says with her hands behind her head.
"And there in lies one of the problems."
Caulifla looked at Kronk in confusion. "What?"
"You were able to get close to your Goku easily. Make him like you. Care about you. See you as a friend. Maybe something more than that."
"O-Okay. Laying it a bit thick, aren't ya, doc," Caulifla asks with a blush.
"Not at all. Goku's Saiyan instincts naturally gravitated towards you, which is why he was able to act so freely and naturally around you, enjoy his time with you, and do and say borderline flirty things with you. That's exactly why he was able to answer King Kai's question so quickly."
"Oh, you didn't read your own story? Well, Ol' King Kai asked Goku which he preferred spending the most time with, you or Chi-Chi, he didn't even hesitate when he answered you."
"HE WHAT," Slick and Caulifla went at the same time, Caulifla in her famous blush.
"Yup. But Goku isn't the only enabler. From what I've read, Goten in your universe seems to compare you and his dad to his brother and his wife."
"Aaaaaaw, Goten, what you doin', son," Slick asked as he face palmed.
"And not just him, but King Kai, Whis, Bulma, and even Beerus seems to notice how close you two are. In fact, according to this latest chapter, he mistook you for Goku's wife, right?"
"Don't remind me," Caulifla said with a blush. "That was seriously embarrassing."
"More embarrassing than when you kissed Goku in the previous chapter?"
Caulifla turned completely red.
"You did what," Slick asked.
"DON'T BRING THAT UP! THAT WAS JUST A STUPID MISTAKE I MADE! I READ WHAT WASN'T THERE, THINKING HE WAS FLIRTING WITH ME SINCE I GOT THERE, FELL FOR HIM, AND STUPIDLY KISSED HIM!"
"You also fell asleep on him and used him as a pillow."
"WHAT," Slick went.
Caulifla twitched before she fell back onto the couch, face in her hands. "I made... so many mistakes."
"There, There now. I understand how you're feeling. And to tell the truth, it's refreshing to meet a Caulifla that gets her faults. The only question now is 'where do I go from here'?"
Caulifla sat upright. "Yes! I have no idea what to do. I don't want to ruin anyone's life. Even if Chi-Chi is the worst."
"Hold up, NOW you're beginning to sound like our Caulifla," Slick said inquisitively.
"So this other me doesn't like her much either? " Caulifla retorted. " I guess we are the same person. That makes sense. The Chi-Chi I know is obsessed with 'traditional earth family values' and 'making our lives boring'."
"My Chi-Chi can be like that sometimes, but she's also trying to get me caught up by bringing all sorts of females to the house. She be testing me. " Slick mentioned with a smirk that he tried to hide.
"Wait, do you mean?-"
"SLICK! This session isn't about you. Let's not start airing dirty laundry." Said Kronk. "On the record, anyway."
Caulifla rolled her eyes. "Can we please keep this professional? " She crossed her arms. "Is there any advice you can start giving me? If not, we can just call this a day."
"I was just getting to that, now Caulifla. I think we need to start by asking the biggest question: Do you love your Goku, or is this just a sort of physical infatuation?"
"L-LOVE?!" Caulifla's blushing face burns red hot. "I-I... I don't-not? ...uhhhh"
Dr. Kronk jots down some notes. "Caulifla. This is a safe space. You can be honest here. No judgments."
"I mean, there may be a little judgement. Hah!" Slick interjected.
"I... think that... Kale and I broke up not very long ago, and stupid Cabba is making things difficult. And all Chi-Chi does is yell at him and their son. And I'm not supposed to be here for very long, and I live in another universe, and-"
Dr. Kronk stopped her. "Caulifla. You're avoiding the question. Do you or do you not have real feelings for your Goku?"
"YEAH CAULIFLA DO YOU WUV YOUR GOKU SENPAI!?" Slick blared out, laughing at his own joke.
Caulifla slouched down, lowering her face as to not make eye contact with anyone. Just under her breath, she barely audibly whispers "...I think I do..."
"WHAT WAS THAT? CAN'T HEAR YOU?!" Slick once again burst out, dropping all subtly.
"I SAID I AM IN LOVE WITH HIM! THERE! ARE YOU HAPPY?! UGH!" Caulifla screamed, caught by surprise by her own words. She began to silently sob "I love him."
Kronk and Slick both shared a glance. "Well, that may complicate things" Said Dr. Kronk, as plainly as he can manage.
"Complicate things, he says," Caulifla says as she buries her face into her hands again. "It wasn't even supposed to happen. He was just supposed to be my teacher, not the first man I've ever fallen in love with. It wouldn't be like this if I was still with Kale."
"You were dating Kale," Slick asked.
"Yeah. But I broke up with her."
"Why? You two looked good together," Slick said.
"I'm not going to go into detail as to why I broke up with my best friend. This is how I'm supposed to save my teacher's marriage instead of ruining it."
"Well, let's start off with something simple: WHY are you in love with him," Kronk asked.
Caulifla sighed. "Kaio-Ken. Instant Transmission. Kamehameha. Afterimages. He taught me all of it. He's given me so much in the short amount of time I've trained with him. He even made me into a literal goddess. What guy could possibly beat that?"
"Aw, shiz, he's giving out the Secrets of Goku! The Council will not stand for this!"
"Council," Caulifla asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Don't get distracted, Cauli," Kronk said.
"HEY! ONLY GOKU GETS TO CALL ME THAT!"
Kronk actually jumped.
"Dayum," Slick went.
Caulifla realized what she did and sighed. "Sorry."
"You really do love this boy, don'tcha," Slick asked.
Caulifla continued to look down. "Like I said, he made me into a goddess. If that's not bad enough, he's my type. I already told Chi-Chi all of this when she came to talk to me while I was bathing."
"Wait, what," Slick went. "Well, Chi-Chi's a freak."
"It's just me taking a bath, dude. There was plenty of steam and no one else was around. Though, I did learn that taking a bath in a drum isn't half bad, especially taking it at night. Seriously nice view. Anyway, I explained how my type of guy had to be strong, someone that I can't just beat. Handsome, but not too handsome. It doesn't matter if he's dumber or smarter than me, just as long as he can keep up or even surpass me. Someone who's always a challenge. Someone who starts a fire in me and pushes me to new heights. Who livens things up just by being there. Someone like..." She sighed.
"Me," Slick said. "Or any Goku for that matter. You just perfectly described a Goku."
"That's when I realized it. That's when I realized I was in love with him. While I was taking a damned bath while talking to the man's wife." She chuckled. "What a dumb time to find out you're in love with an older and married man."
"I see," Kronk said as he was writing notes down. "And what happened after that?"
"I found out how stupid Goku and Chi-Chi's marriage was," Caulifla answered with blank, bored eyes.
Slick laughed his head off. "Oh, the savagery! My Saiyan, my Saiyan," he went as he patted her back.
"I just dissed your marriage."
"Hell no, you didn't. You dissed that hillbilly's marriage. WHOA," Slick went as he bent back in time to avoid Caulifla's ki blast.
"What did I say about insulting him?"
"Damn, Caulifla. You loyal. Respect."
Kronk cleared his throat to get everyone's attention. "Now, why would you insult Goku's marriage to Chi-Chi like that?"
"Dude, they only got married because of a childhood promise he didn't understand."
"Well, I don't see what the big deal i-"
"A promise that only happened because Goku kicked Chi-Chi in the crotch to make sure she was a girl. Plus, he thought weddings and marriages were types of food. Not only that, but they hadn't seen each other in five years, and Goku didn't recognize her at all when they met again at the World Tournament."
The room went silent.
"Yeah. I can't defend that. That's... that's really dumb," Kronk said as he looked down at his papers.
"Not gonna lie, that's a really, really, REALLY dumb reason," Slick said.
"And how the hell did you end up marrying her?"
"Met her at Bulma's party. We smashed. I liked it. Put a ring on it."
Caulifla stared blankly at Slick.
"Eh, still better than how my Goku got hitched."
"YOUR Goku," Slick asked condescendingly with a smirk.
"I will beat you like an ancient Sadalan War Drum."
"Hah! You think YOU can beat ME?"
"I beat my Goku. How tough can you be," Caulifla asks as she pops her knuckles.
"Oh, shiz, we doin' this? Fine. I'll smack you upside yo head like you want. Get ready to get knocked onto yo fine ass."
"Huh," Caulifla went with a raised eyebrow.
Slick realized what he said. "Don't read into that. Do NOT read into th-"
Caulifla U popped up. "Ah-ha-ha-ha! Do I sense Slick being naughty?"
"Hm? What the- Is that me?"
"I mean, technically? This is kind of a weird situation, me."
Caulifla U. looked at GTH Caulifla before looking at Slick. "I feel like this is your fault, somehow."
"Uh-uh-uh. This is Kronk's business. Not mine."
"Oh." Caulifla then looked at her counterpart. "Gang leader?"
"I already like her. We're going to get along just fine," U. said as she patted GTH's back.
"Uh-huh. Listen, I've got some crap to deal with, and I'm hoping Kronk can help."
"What? You having trouble getting into your Goku's pants, too?"
"Eh, yo! Hey," Slick yelled.
GTH sighed. "The fact that it's so easy is my problem."
"What," U. and Slick went in unison.
GTH then looked down, rubbing her arm in a cute way unintentionally. "I'm in love with the guy. I'm fine with admitting it, but I still have some honor left. I'm not about to ruin someone's marriage, no matter how much I want him for myself."
Slick stared at GTH with wide eyes. "Damn. What a woman."
"You're not going to... Oh, no. Don't tell me you actually LIKE Chi-Chi," U. yelled, looking disgusted.
"Oh, hell no," GTH said as she waved the notion away with an uninterested look. "Chi-Chi hates my guts, and I sure as hell am no fan of hers. I'm trying to protect Goku's marriage, not hers."
Everyone stared at GTH before U burst out laughing. "Yeah, fuck Chi-Chi! I don't approve of you technically helping her, but the fact you're only doing this for Goku makes it funny somehow."
"Come on, man." GTH looked at Slick. "I thought you was cool. Why you gotta hate my wife?"
"Hey, she started it," Caulifla went with a shrug. "She took one look at me and immediately thought I was a delinquent."
"That's because you are," Kronk said.
"Regardless, she judged me the moment she saw me. She especially went crazy when I turned Super Saiyan." She then transformed to emphasize her point before reverting back. "Even said I was corrupting Goten when he copied me."
"Yeah, Chi-Chi does go crazy whenever any of us go blonde."
"What do you see in her?"
Slick looked at GTH with wide eyes. "What?"
"I don't get it. What makes Chi-Chi so special? With my Goku, she actively tries to take the fight out of him, makes him farm, losses it whenever he uses his Super Saiyan powers, and is pretty much trying to make him more... human. Like she doesn't want him to be a Saiyan."
U. looked at GTH with a weird expression before looking at Slick. "Dude."
Kronk then sighed. "I'm deducting a LOT of points for that."
"Wha- Oh, come on! That ain't even MY wife! That is another Goku's wife!"
"BULLSHIT! She might as well have been describing YOUR Chi-Chi," U. went.
"And I'm sorry to say, Slick, but Chi-Chi hasn't been making nearly as much good progress as you are."
"Oh, bragging rights. No, wait! That's because she keeps hoes like Dr. Che-Thot-So around her!"
"Something I will have to deal with later," Kronk said in a low voice. "Still, that doesn't change the fact that she seems to actually be REGRESSING as apposed to your progress."
"I can't help it if I'm the greatest!"
GTH cleared her throat. "You gonna answer my question or what?"
"What. Makes Chi-Chi. So. Special?"
"Yeah. Especially when you could have a girl like me," U. said seductively.
"Uh-uh, uh-uh, uh-uh. I don't go after thirsty hoes. You'd have more of a chance if you were more like her," Slick said as he pointed at GTH, who raised her eyebrow with her hands on her hips at the gesture. "Oh, shiz, DON'T READ INTO THAT!"
"I'm not. I told you, you're not my type."
"Well... good to know," Slick went.
"Someone sounds annoyed," U. said teasingly.
"Shut up," Slick said through gritted teeth. He then took a deep breath. "A'ight. You wanna know why I love me wife?"
"Please. Enlighten us," GTH said.
"It's because she cooks good and is damn good at smash."
"Wait, that's it?"
"She cooks for you and bangs you?"
"Dude... that's lame."
"WHAT?! THAT AIN'T LAME! THAT'S-"
"Something you can get if you have a damn good maid."
Slick's jaw fell.
"Ooooooooooh," Kronk and U. went in unison.
"Aw, you did NOT just dis my wife like that," Slick said.
"Sorry. I say it as I see it."
"I LOVE this version of me! Hey, did you know that Chi-Chi let her mom poison Slick?"
"Aye, yo! We don't need to talk about that. I got rid of the bitch, so she don't matter no mo-"
"She. Did. WHAT?!" GTH Caulifla's enraged roar shook the entire building.
"Oh, shiz. She mad. She even went all the way to Three. Wait, what?"
"Aw, what?! She can go Super Saiyan 3 and I can't? That's lame," Caulifla U. said.
GTH took a breath and powered down. "Alright, Slick. You have one, count it, one chance to prove to me that Chi-Chi is a good wife to you."
"Why do I have to prove anything to-"
"SHUT UP!" Slick stiffened up, standing like a soldier at attention.
"Whoa. I've never seen Slick afraid of anything," U. said.
Caulifla took another breath. "What did Chi-Chi do?"
"How did she respond to her mom poisoning you? How did she punish the bitch?"
"Uh. Well, she actually didn't." GTH's glare began to hurt Slick. "She honestly thought I was lyin' for the longest time. Let her mom slide. Didn't believe me until I exposed the witch in front of everyone. All she did was let me banish her back to Otherworld."
"Are. You. FUCKING! KIDDING ME?!" Everyone jumped. "IS THIS A DAMNED JOKE, BECAUSE I'M NOT LAUGHING! SHE DIDN'T BELIEVE YOU?! I DON'T CARE IF SHE'S HER MOM! I BELIEVE MY CREW, MY FAMILY FIRST AND FOREMOST! I TRUST THEM WITH MY LIFE! I PUNISH ANYONE WHO FUCKS WITH MY FAMILY! AND IF IT TURNS OUT MY FAMILY WAS LYING, I'D BEAT THE HELL OUT OF THEM FOR LYING TO ME! BUT I SURE AS HELL WOULD TRUST MY HUSBAND BEFORE MY MOM! Well, especially MY mom, since I wasn't all that close to her, but that's beside the point. The point is... where the hell is the partnership?"
"What," Slick asked.
"Where. Is. The. Partnership? Why is Chi-Chi your partner? When has she ever been absolutely on your side?" Slick was about to say something. "And don't bring up sex or housework."
"Or your kids."
"Damn. Uuuh... Ooh! There was- well... That won't work. She spent a lot of my money, buying a damned mall. Giving me a shot. Enrolling me in school."
"Enrolling you in what?" He looked to see Caulifla looking at him with a raised eyebrow. "The hell do you need school for? You're old. Plus, you're busy with training and keeping the assholes of the universe in check, aren't you?"
"THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN SAYING! THANK YOU! Aw, man. Caulifla, youse my Saiyan!"
"Uh-huh. You realize you lost your chance to convince me, right?"
"Uh. Oh. Oh, damn."
Caulifla U laughed so hard that she fell to her knees, holding her sides. "What did I tell you, Kronk? What did I tell you on our first therapy session?! All the problems stem from Chi-Chi!" She then rolled onto her back, kicking uncontrollably as she continued to laugh.
"Yeah, Slick and Chi-Chi have been coming to me for marriage counseling. They've been making some pretty good progress, actually. Slick more than Chi-Chi."
"Wait... are you saying... Aw, dammit! I'm ruining another marriage," GTH yelled as she fell onto the couch with her face in her hands again. She sighed heavily. "What's wrong with me?"
"Caulifla, listen." She looked up at Kronk. "I understand that this is difficult. I'm willing to say that this is the most difficult case I've faced yet. In fact, I'm sorry to say... that there might not be an easy win for you in this. There are too many factors working against you."
Caulifla sighed. "Like what? Lay 'em on me."
"Well, from just looking at you, I can already say that you're a beautiful woman."
". . . Hah?"
"I'm serious. You're beautiful, powerful, loyal, honorable; all traits that men like Goku would go crazy over from pure instinct."
"Are you saying all I need to do to get Slick as act more like her," U. asked.
"Hah! You WISH you could be like her," Slick went.
"You might as well have just said 'yes'," GTH said as she slumped down. When Slick realized what he had said and that GTH was technically right, he smacked his forehead hard enough for it to sound like a gunshot. "What are my other problems, doc?"
"Well, from what I read from your manga, great story and artwork, by the way."
She sighed. "Thanks. It's been translated to Spanish, you know."
"Oh, that's nice. Great for works of art to be enjoyed by multiple cultures. Anyway, anyway, from what I can tell, you're developing into one of the most powerful Saiyans in the multiverse. I mean, you beat Goku!"
"You beat Goku," U. asked.
"You beat a Goku? Props, girl," Slick went with a thumbs up.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm awesome. Enough with the praising. You were saying, doc?"
"It's because of your strength that you're attracting your Goku. Hell, you're attracting Slick here without even trying."
"Don't remind me," they said in unison.
GTH looked up at Slick with a raised eyebrow before looking at him with a neutral gaze. "Dude."
"Aw, shiz," Slick yelled as he pulled his hand down his face.
"What's more, Goku obviously ENJOYS spending time with you. He literally said so on many occasions. You get him excited. You give him a challenge. You give him a goal. You give him a friend that can keep up with him. You're basically giving him everything he ever wanted. I mean, come on! Most of these chapters of you two training might as well be you two flirting! EVERYONE in this comic who sees you together sees you as a damned couple! Beerus called you Goku's wife!"
"HE WHAT," Slick went.
"I know! That was so freakin' embarrassing," Caulifla said into her hands, muffling her voice.
"Caulifla, I know you want to save Goku's marriage, but I'm afraid it might not happen."
Caulifla kept her face in her hands before looking up. "You said MIGHT."
"It's a long shot, but there could be a miracle in the works. Maybe Goku will do something to convince Chi-Chi he likes being married to her, or maybe Chi-Chi will do something to convince Goku he loves her."
"Yeah, that last part ain't happening," GTH, Slick, and U. said in perfect unison as they waved their hands at the same time.
"Wait, SLICK," GTH and U. went in unison as they looked at the Saiyan.
"What? I sit on the Council of Goku. I know how Gokus think. I know how Chi-Chis think since I'm happily married to one."
"Debatable," U. said in a singsong tone.
"SHUT UP! Anyways, I know that Chi-Chi won't be able to convince Goku he loves her like she wants him to."
"Especially not this one, because he. Loves. Me," U. said.
"Man, no one loves you," Slick said to U.
"Aw, so mean," U. said mockingly.
"So, what you're saying is, their marriage is screwed, it's basically my fault, and there's nothing I can do to fix it."
"What I'm saying is that you've done all that you can," Kronk said. "What you've done is admirable. Brave, even. Not many people would go out of there way to save a marriage when it means they could never be with the one they love. Hell, most people try to RUIN the marriage."
"Cau-Li-Fla," Slick went at U. She stuck her tongue out at him playfully.
"You've done everything you can, Caulifla. No one can or should ask more of you. All you can do now is let the cards fall as they may. And whatever happens, just know that you have yer old pal Dr. Kronk here to vent to."
Caulifla sighed as she stood up. "Well, at least I can take solace in that last part. I mean, these sessions are only 500 bucks, right?"
Caulifla giggled. "Might as well ask for the spare change in my pocket."
"WHAT?! Come on, dawg. These sessions are expensive as hell," Slick went.
"Please. I'm rich," Caulifla said with a wave.
"Damn. You's a real on, Cauli."
"Mm. Remember what I said," Caulifla went as she charged a ki blast.
"A'ight, a'ight, a'ight. No need for ki, Cauli-FLA."
"Better," she said as she dissipated the ki. She then smiled at Kronk. "Thanks, doc. If anything crazy or stupid happens later on, I'll be sure to tell you. Though, what could happen in 3 more chapters?"
The lights in Kronk's officer flickered.
"That was weird," Caulifla went.
"Eh, weird things happen. Anyway, like I said, I'll be here."
"Thanks, doc. Later."
"Aye, yo, Caulifla, why not come over to my bar?"
"I like ya. You deserve a couple cold ones."
"Ooh, getting treated to drink by Slick," U. asked.
"YOU gotta pay."
GTH giggled. "I got her covered." She then placed a fist on Slick's pec. "You'd better not give me anything soft like that Senzu Lean of yours, or else I'll have to kick your ass."
"You challenging my bartending skills? Now you REALLY need to come to my bar. I'll give you the best drink of yo LIFE!"
"I'm in," U said as she grabbed Slick's free hand.
"Why you gotta be like that? Why can't you- You know what? Screw it. Later Kronk. Instant Transmission!"
The trio of Saiyans then disappeared.
Kronk then sighed in relief. "Oh, that was a challenge." He then looked at his notes. "Yeah, her Chi-Chi is fuck."
A/N: And that's a wrap. This was literally an out of nowhere thing. I only wrote it because of a comment on CH 11 pg 5 by Fuuryu1: Whoa! ChiChi about to say the "M" word again. Someone call Dr. Kronk!
And bada-bing, bada-boom, ya got Caulifla Goes to Therapy, courtesy of yours truly and chumpchange himself.
And since you lot are here, I have some questions for you:
1. I'm hoping you read the manga by now, so I have to ask the same question chump has asked: who do you hear when you read the story, especially for Caulifla herself?
Personally, I hear Prince Vegeta for a majority of the male cast, Goku, Cabba, Piccolo, and of course, Vegeta. It's Caulifla the two of us are having trouble with. At some points, you can hear Bunny VA's spunky, tomboy Caulifla; but at others, you can hear Caulifla U's sexy Caulifla. Sometimes, you even hear Elizabeth Maxwell herself. It really is difficult. Who do you guys think would be the best voice for GTH Caulifla? In fact, anyone interested? If so, talk to chumpchangedraws on Deviant Art.
2. As you have probably guessed by now, this is a parody of Slick Goku and Kronk Force's joint skits. That's why I gotta ask you guys, do you think I should show Slick this and commission for this to be animated?
chumpchangedraws said he would freak if we were able to get to work with Slick Goku, but I'm not sure if that's a good move on my part or not. True, it would be a commission, but do you guys think I should show it to him or just keep it here on fan fic where it won't bother anyone? I'll let you guys decide.
Well, that's just about it. I hope you guys enjoyed this. Who knows? Maybe another great comment on GTH will create a sequel to this. Hell, I technically gave way for a sequel by having Slick take both Cauliflas to his bar. Caulifla Goes to the Bar or something. Has legs, but I'll let you guys decide.
Will this be animated by the big man himself? Will GTH surge with popularity due to this act? Will it one day be dubbed, or better yet, animated (maybe by Synetic)? Only time will tell.
Until next time!