The Digital Stimulation Situation
In the Apartment Sheldon, Penny, Leonard, Howard and Raj are sitting around eating chinese food.
"HIC!" Sheldon looked round, startled
"hic!" He jumps, covering his mouth
"Oh no! Hic!" he realises it's him hiccuping.
"Nervous hiccups?" asked Leonard. "Worried about the big presentation tomorrow?"
"Nothing HIC of the sort! HIC!"
"Hey Hey! I saw this on my "Fun science for kids!" feed – the Nobel award for hiccups!"
"You mean the IGNobel award ?"
"That's the one!"
"That's not real science!"
"you see, it's HIC a play on words, 'ig-nobel' HIC sounding like 'ignoble' HIC which means "not honourable HIC in character or purpose", the HIC inverse of 'noble', and HIC the Nobel prize, named HIC after its founder Sir Alfred Nobel HIC "
Penny has found it on her phone and gleefully reads "Francis Fesmire of the University of Tennessee College of Medicine who is a specialist in emergency medicine and cardiology, published "Termination of intractable hiccups with digital rectal massage" in Anals of Emergency Medicine"
Leonard butts in to correct her "it's An-nals not A-nals"
"Sure looks like Anals to me, sport! Listen!"
"He treated a man who walked into the emergency room after hiccupping for 72 hours at up to 30 times a minute. Now, Runaway electrical impulses in the vagus nerve cause intractable hiccups, so Fesmire attempted to block them by stimulating the nerve."
"Gagging, tongue pulling, sinus massage and pressing the eyeball to stimulate the vagus all failed to stop the hiccups. Then he remembered reading about a case in which digital rectal massage – inserting a finger into a patient's anus – had slowed a racing heartbeat, an effect similar to runaway hiccups. It worked, and the rest is history,"
Leonard, Howard and Raj collapse in hysterical laughter while Sheldon goes as white as a sheet and bolts from the room , hiccuping in panic all the way.
Penny reads the rest of the article to herself and smiles.
"The weird end of science really does get odd, doesn't it?"
"knock knock knock HIC Penny"
"knock knock knock HIC Penny"
"knock knock knock HIC Penny"
He's leaning on the door frame, one arm clutched tight across his chest. The other clutching a pack of Chocolate muffins. Bright blue latex medical gloves
"Come in Sheldon, what's wrong? Still got the hiccups?"
"yes, to the HIC point of physical pain. I tried HIC every simple medical cure I could, HIC as did the others, then it devolved into HIC urban myth, internet lists, old wives tales HIC and frankly witchcraft"
"tried water from the wrong side of a glass? Cold key down the back?"
"All that and more. HIC Then they got bored and left me to HIC recover on my own. This increased HIC the panic even more" He hands her a printed check list with every line ticked off;
- breathe into a paper bag
(do not put it over your head)
(do not use a plastic bag).
- pull your knees up to your chest and lean forward.
- sip ice-cold water.
- bite on a lemon or taste vinegar.
- hold your breath for a short time.
- Drinking water quickly.
- Swallowing granulated sugar, dry pieces of bread, or crushed ice.
- Gently pulling on your tongue.
- Gagging (sticking a finger down your throat).
- Gently rubbing your eyeballs.
- Gargling water.
- Hold your breath and swallow three times.
"Oh god, you're as white as a sheet." He staggers and she grabs him, holding him up.
"You're sweating and cold. Does it hurt that much?"
He hiccups and winces again. "I believe HIC I have sprained HIC my diaphragm" he offers her the muffins with a trembling hand "I have HIC no idea what foodstuffs HIC to offer to initiate this level of extremely HIC personal social discourse but I am HIC desperate, so I just have to ask – would HIC you try it?"
"try it? What it?"
"HIC Your suggestion."
"My Suggestion? I didn't suggest… OOOOHHH you thought I? You want me to?" her eyes go wide and her jaw hangs open. "you mean?" She holds up her index finger and wiggles it in a 'come here' motion "you want me to stimulate your nerve thingy by putting my finger up your butt to cure your hiccups?"
Sheldon nods and hands her the blue medical gloves "Either that or take me HIC to the emergency room where I may get HIC medical assistance"
Penny looks at the gloves dubiously, then at the obvious distress on his face
"OK, come into the bedroom"
She sits him on the bed and pops into the bathroom to grab a few things.
She comes out in only a big nightshirt that comes down to her mid thighs
"I know this is going to be scary and humiliating for you, so I thought I should help put you at ease as much as I can."
Pulls the shirt off over her head, leaving her naked except for a tiny pastel pink thong
"If you're going to be naked and feel humiliated, so will I"
She holds up a small pink silicone tapered cone "this is my little princess plug, I figured to help you overcome the embarrassment I should have something in my butt too, so we can be butt-hole buddies"
She also has a tube of Silky lube. "With anal you can never have too much lube." She tucks it down the front of her thong 'to warm up'.
She bends over the bed, her ass up in Sheldons face. She pulls the string of her thong aside so Sheldon was staring straight at the pink puckered rosebud of her asshole. She puts a blob of lube on the toy, another on her asshole.
"I never thought I'd be doing this on a Saturday night" She says as she fumbles round, finding the pucker of her asshole with the tip of the plug and slowly sliding it in, pausing, sliding it further as Sheldon watched in horrified fascination.
She gives a low moan as she works it in and out, feeling it stretch out her asshole until she gets it over the widest part and it slides all the way in, her butthole gripping the stem so the sparkly pink fake gemstone sat firmly between her ass cheeks.
"Cute, eh?" She asks, wiggling her tush at him
"Hic!" he agrees, wincing.
She remembers the urgency "Right, right, the cure"
She drops to her knees in front of him, unbuckling his belt with a well practised motion.
"I've had all sorts of naughty thoughts about this moment and I never guessed it'd be because of hiccups"
"Why HIC are you doing HIC it like that?" Sheldon asks.
"You'll see" She answers. "Now lean on the door"
She tugs his tighty whitey underpants down at the back, exposing buttocks almost as pale. Pulling on the blue medical gloves she squeezes some silky white lube into her palm and works it over her fingers to warm it up.
"Hic!" he nods.
She gently probes with her fingertip and when she finds his asshole, wiggles her finger in.
Sheldon goes rigid in shock, important parts of his nervous system sounding intruder alarms he never knew existed.
Penny strokes around in his ass, awestruck by the massive bulge that's appearing in the front of his shorts. They sure build them big in Texas. But she can feel him grip her finger every time he hiccuped, it wasn't working.
"Hic! Hic!" He explained in panic
"It's ok honey, time for Plan B. There's a reason I'm down here like this"
Keeping her finger busy she reached round and pulled his underpants all the way down. The erect cock that springs out is frankly astonishing, spurred on by the neurological distress and rectal stimulation until it was a huge throbbing member wrapped in pulsing veins ending in a huge purple head.
With a rush of wet heat in her groin Penny realised she'd just soaked her little panties through
wrapping her fingers around his shaft as best she can, she starts to work it up and down. Already his balls are drawing up tight and a drop of cum is already on the head.
"How about we stimulate my vagus nerve as well?" She grins and licks her lips, then tastes the cum on the tip of his cock. The noise he makes is a strangled groan but definitely not a hiccup Encouraged by that she takes him in her mouth, Sliding down his cock until she's right onto his balls. She makes a gagging sound as he fills her throat but keeps on working with both hands, even though her pussy was desperately throbbing for attention.
He gives a long drawn out moan of "PennnnnnnNNNNYYny URGH " and grabs her head with both hands, stumbling forward to bump his head on the door. This also slams her back, his cock filling her throat as he grabs two handfuls of her hair and pumps instinctively, fucking her face as he comes, great jets of pearly white cum in her mouth, making her choke and drool it down onto her breasts. It's too much for her aching cunt and as she chokes to swallow the endless stream of cum she suddenly feels the hot pulse quiver through her as she comes, thighs shaking, her asshole pulsing as it grips her little plug.
Sheldon pulls back, cock rapidly subsiding as it shoots the last few spurts onto her blissed out face. She smiles up at him, the rooms spinning but WOW it was worth it.
"How you feeling?"
Sheldon is shell shocked, but takes a breath. And another. No hiccups
"It worked! Thank you Penny! Thank you! However did you know?"
She grins, soaked with cum and saliva but with a radiantly happy smile "I read the rest of the article"
"In researching his Ig Nobel acceptance speech, he told New Scientist that he found a treatment sure to be more popular with hiccup patients. "An orgasm results in incredible stimulation of the vagus nerve. From now on, I will be recommending sex – culminating with orgasm – as the cure-all for intractable hiccups."
"Termination of intractable hiccups with digital rectal massage"
Annals of Emergency Medicine (vol 17, p 872).