Title: Softer - Chapter 7 of Maybe When...
Author: Xionin
Rating: Strong R
Pairing: Buffy/Spike.
Feedback: Pretty please?
Disclaimer: ME dropped the ball. I picked it up.
Summary: This a medium series based on Buffy's line to Spike from 'End of Days'. She begins to say 'maybe when [this is all over,] but Spike interrupts her. It's an AU approach to the series finale [because you know how much I loved that] and then moves into the 'what ifs'.

And oh yeah, it's a total piece of fluff. Enjoy!


"Mmmmmmmm..." Buffy moaned. "Oh...god!"

Spike smirked knowingly.

He grabbed another Morello cherry, dipped it into the warming Nutella and brought it to her mouth. He moved in slow motion, so as not to miss a single stage of her anticipation. Three times he had fed her this way and each time she'd gone through the same routine.

Moisten her lips with that sweet, little tongue.
Open her mouth slightly as her hungry eyes followed the movements of his approach.
Sigh a little as the confection neared her lips.
Sweep out her tongue to catch it as he gave it to her.
Close her eyes and moan at the first taste.
Slowly chew while alternately moaning or exclaiming 'oh god' in that husky voice she reserves only for him.
Inhale slowly, eyes still closed.
Smile, slow and satisfied.
Lick her bottom lip and bite it.
Open her incredible eyes and look at him like...


Just like she was looking at him right then, like he was the next chocolate-dipped cherry.

Oh God.
He. Is. Going. To. Explode.

"Spike?" Buffy noticed his rapid breathing and scrunched her brow. "You ok hon?" She tilted her head in mock concern, stifling a grin. He only nodded vigirously, staring at her lips. "Something you...want? Need?"

"Oh bloody hell, woman!" He grabbed her face and plundered her mouth. The sweet taste of the confections and her own uniqueness was intoxicating. He released her, breathing heavily. She looked stunned.


"Sorry, pet. I...you...I need to stand up for a bit." He rose so quickly, Buffy had to catch the bowl of cherries to keep them from spilling. She smiled in self-satisfaction. Spike leaned his hands against the tree, head hanging down. He counted to ten and then looked at her from under his arm. "You did that on purpose." He narrowed his eyes and smiled. Buffy feigned innocence.

"Did what, baby?" she said, licking a smudge of Nutella from her finger tip and glancing up with big, doe eyes. He laughed, then and moved, suddenly, pulling her up by her arms. His hands were hot with his mortal blood, but the power that she knew was Spike was still there. It was an exciting combination.

"Buffy..." his breathing was ragged, full of emotion and desire. She smiled at him then.

"I love the way you say my name."


"Yeah." She wrapped her arms around his neck and gazed up at him. "You say it like you mean it." He smiled, but he was confused.

"Care to enlighten me?" He brought his arms around her and locked them in place, supporting most of her weight. She looked around a bit for words and then back into his amazing blue eyes.

"You say it...like it means everything to you. Like I...mean everything." Spike brought a hand up and brushed the hair away from her forehead, suddenly serious.

"You do, Buffy. Don't you know that?" She swallowed hard and nodded. Tears began to well up in her again and Spike frowned, placing his lips against her hair.

"Tut tut, luv, none o' that now. Tonight's about smiling and laughing and...other things."

"I'm sorry, it's just...this is all...tonight is so beautiful, Spike." She stepped back from him and looked around. "All of this is so incredible! You. You are incredible."


They had walked from Revello Drive hand in hand, both trying to calm their raging desire to run back to the house and skip to the end of their date. Buffy had help, though. She was curious.

What in the world could they do in Sunnydale? Just about everything was closed, deserted or looted. She thought maybe they were going back to his hotel room; a thought that she didn't mind at all. She had no doubt that they would make love tonight for the first time. She wanted that for them. They deserved it, after everything they'd been through together and apart; everything they'd suffered and sacrificed.

And she wanted to give herself to him completely; something she'd never done before.

Yesterday when he'd come out of that deep sleep, they had resolved so many things in a few simple words; her words. Her final apology.
And later they had shared their first, real, loving kiss.

Tonight they were to share their first real date.

Things were moving fast, but considering their history, it wasn't really fast at all. She knew this man. All of his faults, his quirks, his strange and fantastic mind. And he knew her...probably better than she knew herself.

Wandering through the quiet streets, they hadn't talked much. And when they did, it was in hushed tones. Everything seemed otherwordly. The setting sun, which he'd finally gotten to share with her, cast a bronze glow on everything. Buffy had watched Spike's face intently as he described his view to her; how everything looked strange and unfamiliar in this new light.

His long, indulgent lashes had swept his cheeks with emphasis, teaching her important lessons. His full lower lip had hypnotized her with its unwitting sensuality. His eyes had danced and Buffy wanted to know the rhythm. She'd held his hand tightly and didn't even notice where they were going until they'd gotten there.

'There' was the Oak tree...transformed. There they'd stopped.

Tiny votive lanterns hung low from the leafless bottom branches, each with a lit white candle. There must have been dozens of them. The little flames swayed to and fro in the slight breeze. On the ground lay a crimson red blanket covered with the trappings of a picnic: plates, glasses, a basket filled with what looked like fruit and cheeses. A bottle of wine stood at the ready, next to it were crystal glasses trapping the reflected light from the candles.

Music was coming from somewhere that Buffy couldn't see. Behind the tree, perhaps. It wasn't something that she was familiar with, but it was beautiful and perfect; A string quartet playing some romantic piece.

Taking in the scene before her, Buffy had let go of Spike's hand and he watched her, gnawing on his lip while he waited for her reaction, but she had been silent. Buffy had taken a few steps ahead of him.

More of those glorious roses lay scattered on the ground at the perimeter of the blanket with a path of petals leading to where they stood.
The path ended at the blanket which was surrounded by chunky, pillar candles...also white...which caused the whole area to glow.

Buffy had lost her breath. She'd lost her voice. She'd lost her control on the tears that fell in joyous droplets from her shining eyes. Her back was to Spike and he'd been paralysed with fear. He'd hoped that she wouldn't think it was too silly and simple. He'd hoped that she would understand what he was trying to say with all of this. But she just stood there with her back to him and he'd waited for an excruciatingly long period of time...to him.

Buffy had swallowed, coming back to herself and turned to him. One look at her face had told him everything: she'd known.

"I love you too." She'd said, quietly.

"Buffy..." He'd stepped towards her and caught her in a deep and passionate kiss, pouring everything he felt into it and feeling it echoed back to him from her.


When the kiss broke off, he had scooped her up and carried her down the path, his eyes never leaving hers. He'd set her down gently and sat across from her, taking the bottle of wine to open it.

She hadn't been able to take her eyes off of him. He was simply beautiful. There was no other word to describe it. The sunlight had made his blonde hair seem aflame, but in the moonlight...the candlelight...it shined like diamonds. She'd reached up a hand to play with the curls closest to his angelic face. He'd smiled "Dawn's idea."

"Remind me to thank her."

He'd opened the bottle of wine and poured her a glass and then himself. After he set the bottle down, they'd toasted.

"To...the future."

"The future, luv." They both took small draughts. "You hungry, pet?"

"This is very good wine. Yes...a little." She'd smiled. A look of confusion had passed over her face when he'd reached for two small jars: one filled with Morello cherries soaked in brandy and the other filled with a hazelnut and chocolate spread he had announced as Nutella. "I've never heard of it."

He had looked at her as if she'd grown a third eye in the middle of her forehead.

"You're kidding, right?" She'd shaken her head. A wicked grin then burst out on his face and he'd opened the jar, scooping some out and putting it into a small chafing dish that sat atop a tealight warmer. The chocolate had begun to melt as Buffy watched. Spike had poured the cherries into a bowl.

He'd taken a small fork, selected a cherry, dipped it in the chocolate and brought it to her lips.

"Open wide, pet." He'd smiled. Buffy's eyes had rolled up into her head as she swallowed the delicious substance.

"That...is the best thing I've ever had in my mouth!" She had moaned as her tongue darted out to catch the stray smudges on her now gloss-free lips. Spike tilted his head and smiled at her reaction.

"I bet you say that to all the fellows." Her eyes had popped open at that and she'd glared at him and then had the good sense to look embarassed.


"S'ok, pet." Spike hadn't wanted to waste any time discussing or even thinking about her...date...with the principal.
"I was only kidding. Do you want some more?"

"Yes! Yes, yes, yes." Buffy had bounced on her bottom like an eager child.


That brought them to this moment.

"I don't know if I am all that incredible, pet, but this sure is. You..." He bent his head and gently kissed the curve of her neck before he came back up and met her eyes. "-here with me, like this. It's a bloody dream come true."

"For me too, baby." She noticed the blush and the smile this time. "What?" She grinned, ducking her head to meet his eyes.

"S'nothin, jus'...I like that." He waggled his head to dismiss and further discussion, but she pressed anyway.

"You like what?" He wouldn't answer. "C'mon." She kissed him lightly.

"You...you keep calling me...baby." He barely whispered the last word, but she heard it and smiled brightly.

"You like that huh, baby?" He blushed again, closing his eyes and she grinned as his adorable response. "Nice to know." He groaned loudly and hugged her to him.

"Oh GOD! I LOVE THIS WOMAN!" He threw his head back and screamed, laughing. She was a little taken by surprise but she laughed too. He brought his head back up and met her eyes, his eyes glinting with the light of a thousand stars. "I love you Buffy...so much, luv." He pulled her close and held her, swaying back and forth. "So much." He said quietly.

"I love you too, baby. And thank you for tonight." She laid her head on his chest and inhaled him, sighing contentedly.

"Night's not over yet, kitten." He purred slowly into her ear. Her body reacted immediately and she began to tremble. He felt it and leaned back very slowly to see her face. Her dark green orbs were glazing over with a look he'd never seen directed at him, from her, before. He narrowed his eyes, drawing in his cheeks. "You hungry?"

She nodded slowly.

He moved to let her go and step away so that he could fix her something to eat but she caught his face in one hand and brought it back to hers.

She was hungry, yes...but not for food. Spike's lips parted and he drew a quick breath...and then smiled.


He had wanted this for so long, he didn't know what to do first. He kissed her forehead, her nose, her cheeks, hands fluttering over her hair; fingers combing through the soft locks. She placed her hands against his chest and became fascinated by the rapid beating of his heart; the tremor of his body.

She did this to him.

He brought his head back again and looked into her eyes. Buffy stood on tiptoe, never breaking the gaze, and kissed him with parted lips. She could see the heat and hunger...the craving...inside of him. It invigorated her...moved her. She wanted him the same way and she knew that nothing would come between them now.

She slipped her arms around his neck and deepened the kiss, running her tongue lightly along the roof of his mouth. He shivered.
She closed her eyes at the deliciousness of him. The taste. The smell. The smoldering heat.

She did this to him.

He was moaning and trembling and Oh God, it had never been like this before. Not for him. Not with anyone, least of all her. He felt...he felt inexperienced. All of these sensations were so new. William had never done this before and Spike...well...it had all been cold comfort or borrowed heat. But this...

Buffy took control. She broke the kiss and stepped back from him, leaving him panting and groaning from the loss of her, but he stood there frozen in his passion. She smiled sympathetically at the look on his face: fear.

"Don't be afraid, baby. I'll take care of you." She rested her foot on top of the basket and began to unlace one of her sandals. She watched his eyes fall on her bare leg and could almost feel them feasting on her skin. She liked that. She repeated it with the other one, tossing the shoes aside.

Reaching for him, she caught the fabric of his tee in her fingers and tugged upward until it snapped out of the waistband of his pants. He only stood there watching her in awe, unable to move, unable to think of anything but this exquisite woman offering herself, her body and heart, to him. Buffy pulled the shirt over his head and had to swallow at the sight of his bare chest.

My God, the man was gorgeous.

She paused to kiss him again, working her way up from his chest to his succulent lips and he returned it eagerly until she broke it off once again. She stepped back and, never breaking his gaze, unfastened the three buttons of her skirt. It dropped to the blanket, revealing a black cotton panty that was a hair thick and a breath wide.

She thought she saw some drool escape his mouth. She smiled and reached for him again. His expression had changed. The fear was gone replaced with...WANT.

"Buffy...' His voice was onyx gravel. She felt it travel to her core and wrap itself around her, stoking the fires of her need for him.

Quickly unfastening his belt buckle, button and zipper, she looked up at him again. She ran her hand across his collarbone, down his chest and across his abdomen in broad strokes, admiring the smooth perfection of his skin, before she dipped it below the waistline and gently brushed his erection. It jumped, scorching hot, against her hand and Spike closed his eyes while letting out a ragged breath.

"Oh...ga-uhmm." He groaned, opening them. He grabbed her by the shoulders and kissed her roughly. His passion threatened to overwhelm his senses. What she did to him. What she did to him! He ravaged her mouth, attempting to draw her into himself through the mere act of kissing. His hands were everywhere and Buffy soon realized that she was no longer in control of this encounter.

She gasped as he released her from the kiss and attacked her neck, leaving a wet trail across her skin that set her on fire in the cooling night air. She felt his fingers slide under the thin fabric of her top before he lifted it up and over her head and arms. He threw the shirt aside and fell into kissing her again. She swayed on her feet, her emotions and her desire removing her ability to function properly.

He plunged his tongue into her mouth over and over, leaving her dizzy, and then moved down her neck to her collarbone. He dipped her gracefully in his arms until her head fell back and the stiff peaks of her nipple were under his mouth. She tasted so sweet! Spike licked the undersides of her breasts and she moaned out loud, squeezing her eyes shut. When she felt the first touch of his tongue on the tortured pebbles, she cried out his name.

He suckled her like a newborn and licked and nibbled the sensitive flesh until she cried out again. She was shaking. He tilted her back upright and attacked her mouth again. She threw her arms around his neck and returned his kiss in full. They devoured each other, both falling prey to the kiss. Giving in to it. Surrendering to each other. To the feel of their skin against the other's.

Spike placed his arms under her and lifted her up, licking her nipples again as they passed his mouth. He wrapped his arms around her waist and she rested her elbows on his shoulders, her legs around his chest, her fingers in the soft hairs at the nape of his neck. Her hair hung down in his face and he moved his head back and forth, allowing the silky locks to brush him lightly. Looking deep into her eyes, he lowered her until her legs were around his waist. His hardened flesh, still inside the pants, rested against her apex. He could felt the heat. And the smell...

Her smell was driving him in-fucking-sane.

His senses weren't as acute as they had been before, but it didn't matter. This was all so much better. The anticipation made everything so much more intense. He slowly fell to his knees, Buffy still wrapped around him, still kissing him, and lowered her to the blanket. It was soft under her bare back. He released her only to sit back on his heels and stare at the wonderous beauty before him.

Her hair splayed out in a golden halo from her head, she looked at him with complete and total love in her eyes. It made William want to weep, but Spike burned that thought away just by looking at her nubile body. Her face was tilted to the side so that she could see him without propping herself up. One arm was under her head, the other rested carefree across her flat stomach. One leg lay straight while the other, bent at the knee, rested her foot on the blanket. She was a goddess and she was his, all of her, and he wanted her so badly he ached.

Reading his mind, she reached for the flaps of his open trousers. He felt her graze the top of his throbbing erection and he let her know, in no small terms, that he was ready for her. He then stood and stripped himself of his last garment. Buffy gazed at him appraisingly.

"Is it alright to tell you that I think you're beautiful? You're the most beutiful man I've ever seen." She smiled.

He knelt before her and placed a chaste kiss on her kneecap, which made her giggle.

"'I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you.'" He said softly.

"I know that. It's...Brownie?" She knit her brow a bit.

"Browning, luv, yes." He smiled at her, bright and warm. It melted her insides like caramel. She reached for him and he lowered himself so that his body only covered hers partially. He kissed her gently, fingers stroking her peachskin-soft flesh. His eyes were closed, hers open. She studied his face in the candlelight when he pulled back. He merely smiled.

Lowering his head again, he kissed the curve of her neck and planted butterfly kisses down to her breast where his tongue darted out to tease the little raisin at the end. Buffy's eyes closed as her mouth dropped open. He studied her face as he licked her and smiled to himself as he left the area and worked his way down. He kissed the smooth skin of her abdomen, hooking his finger into the wisp of underwear she wore and pulled it down her toned legs, kissing all the way. He put them aside, moved back up and hovered over the tight, dark curls of her mound. He rubbed his nose in them, lightly, and she squrimed in anticipation.

"Cor, pet. You smell like heaven." She lowered her hand to his hair and toyed with the curls within reach. "I want to taste you, luv." She spread her legs ever so slightly, and he settled himself between them, inhaling deeply. He extended his tongue along the soft fold of her outer lips and was surprised to find the copious juices there already.

"You're all ready for me, kitten. Oh God, I want you so bad." He licked the silky innerwalls of her lips and she shuddered beneath him. He did it again, only at the end he found her taught little bundle of nerves and flicked it lightly. She jumped and her thighs began to tremble. He wrapped his hands around them to steady her.

"S-spike...oh...please, baby. " Buffy's head was rolling back and forth on the blanket. Her fingers tightened themselves in his hair as he explored her further, plunging his tongue deep inside and out again; devouring her sex like so much ripe fruit. She was beside herself. The pleasure blinded her, stole her tongue. Someone was making these fevered, gutteral sounds, was that her?

She moaned and writhed beneath him and it only drove him on. He loved doing this to her; for her. She was so sweet and so hot, it made him dizzy. His erection ground mindlessly against the blanket beneath him, moving in time with the gyration of her hips. He reached up one hand and kneaded a firm breast, running the nipple between the soft insides of two fingers.

In his head there were a hundred Buffys beneath him. One in his mouth. One in his hands. One under him, her inner muscles milking him, drawing him out. He moaned into her and she felt the vibrations in her womb. It sent her over the edge and she came screaming, yellow lights dancing inside her heavy eyelids.

He drank her down, every ounce, and licked every stray drop from her inner thighs. It was ambrosia.

Buffy opened her eyes to the sky. In her peripheral view she saw some of the swaying candles in the tree. Directly overhead, an audience of stars winked back at her. She felt him crawl up her body and she lowered her gaze. His eyes were no longer blue, but black with desire. Her nostrils flared as her own desire built up again inside her. She needed to feel him within. She needed to drive him over the edge and mindless with ecstacy.

She raised her head to meet his lips, tasting herself in his kiss. It was a sweet and smoky flavor that she'd learned from his lips only. He pulled back from her and the heat of her gaze burned so hot, he was startled. Her passion for him was acute, and the depth of love he saw there stunned him into silence. She wore the candlelight like a heavenly veil. It lent its glow to her already radiant skin and he stared at her in wonder. Buffy raised herself up on her elbows, and teased him with near-kisses.

"Lie down, baby." It was a gentle command and he flowed over her onto the blanket to lay on his back. Buffy rolled over on top of him and brought herself up on her hands to hover over his chest. She smiled briefly and lowered her head so that the honeyed wheat of her hair brushed along his skin. Bending her knees, she continued to drag her mane down his body, swaying her neck back and forth, tickling him with silk. When she threw her head back and gazed down upon him, she smiled at the effect of her little tease. But one look in his eyes told her they would have time for that later. For now, he needed her.

Buffy kissed her way up his thighs, briefly stopping to lick the head of his member which danced at the contact. Spike groaned loudly.

"Buffy...baby, please." She licked him more firmly, closing her mouth over him for a moment before continuing her journey. She seated herself on his upper thighs, his erection resting up against her coarse curls. She smiled at him as she stroked it gently.

"Love you." She saw the flicker of wonder in his eyes. She would never tire of that. Never.

Raising herself up, she slowly lowered herself onto him. They both moaned at the initial contact. It had been too, too long. Far too long. Buffy wondered how she'd survived without the feel of him. But this was so different from then. There was no way it couldn't be.

Spike thrust his hips upwards, involuntarily, and was rewarded by the clenching of her inner walls. Buffy arched her back and moved in slow circles atop him, driving herself up and down the length of his shaft. Her eyes were closed and her head thrown back wantonly, mouth open in a silent 'O'. Spike grabbed onto her hips and studied the siren moving over him. She was as hot as he remembered, but there was something else: An intensity to her movement. An intent. She wanted to bring him pleasure. She wanted to please him.

"Oh, luv, you're so sweet to me." He half-whispered.

"All for you, baby..." her voice was raspy with the build-up of her pleasure. "Only you, Spike. My William." She opened her eyes and met his gaze. They locked into one another and the rhythm increased as they moved together, instinctively knowing what the other needed.

For Spike, it came as a surprise. The ball of energy started in his gut and then he felt his sac tighten before the stars exploded behind his eyes. He screamed. He screamed her name until his throat was raw with the sound of her. He screamed so loudly that he didn't hear his name on her lips as she came. Buffy felt the hot liquid shoot up into her and it startled her. Where he had once been icy balm to soothe her passion, he was now liquid heat urging her on. She lost all feeling, save for what was happening in her loins. She heard her name on the night air sung by a choir of voices; all his.

They climbed down the mountain together and she collapsed on his chest. They both passed out.


When Buffy came to, Spike was holding her against him, playing with her hair. At some point he had moved her so that only her upper body rested on him. They were laying on the blanket with another one draped across them. When he felt her stir, Spike kissed the top of her head.

"Mornin', luv." Didn't matter that the sky was dark and the stars still shining. She was his sun, and when she awoke, the sun rose.

"Mmm, I do love this blanket. It's so soft." She snuggled up to him.

"Yeah, luv, it's the softest I could find. Only the best for my girl." He inhaled the faint vanilla scent of her hair and stroked her back, loving the feel of the lean muscles under the buttery skin. Buffy shifted to lay on her back, her head resting on his shoulder. She looked up at the tree and then over at the virtually untouched picnic.

"This has been so magical, Spike, but don't think you have to do things like this for me. I'm not...not worth all of this. Just a cheeseburger and fries kinda gal...that's me."

He thought to respond and correct her, but he knew she'd never accept it. He never did understand this: her insecurity. Didn't she know by now that she was his universe? That next to her, nothing could ever compare? Well if reassuring was what she needed, he would give it to her every day for the rest of their lives.

She turned to her side and ran her fingers lightly over the piece of blanket on his chest, her fingers traveling the small valleys created by his musculature.

"Is my skin this soft?" She asked quietly. Seriously.

"Softer." He replied, eyes closed, smiling contentedly.


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