Hi, this will be my first Harry Potter fanfic and the second fic I have ever written. I both loved and hated OotP and even though I love Sirius and all he was, I am going to leave him dead since it will be important in here. I have no idea if you guys will like it so please check it out.

Can someone tell how to do italics on my pc, I have Microsoft word and when I do bold or something in Word, it is normal on ff.net.

DISCLAIMER: Harry Potter and its characters are not mine, I am merely borrowing them.


It was a hot summer afternoon and most people were either sunbathing or hiding in the shade, desperate for some rain.

Luckily it wasn't as bad as the year before, when there had been a ban on the use of hosepipes due to the drought.

There was however one exception to this sight. This was a boy with unruly hair who was weeding the front-yard of Privet Drive number 4.

He was skinny and the sweat was dripping off him as he was pulling out the weeds. His short was far too large and also short and sometimes his belly was exposed. He had large black circles around his eyes, which signalled the lack of sleep he had been getting.

The boy in question was none other than Harry Potter. A sixteen year old wizard who was on holidays from his school.

Hogwarts, the school of witchcraft and wizardry, the school he attended, was more of a home to him than Privet Drive could ever be.

Though this summer had been easier on Harry than any summer before. Sure he still had to do chores, but not nearly as much as he used to get.

Harry stood up as he finished and wiped the sweat off his brow with the back of his hand. He felt filthy so he trudged back into the house in order to get a shower.

As soon as he set a foot in the house he was interrogated by his aunt. "What are you doing inside, you are supposed to be working in the garden."

Her question was accompanied by a half-sneer, half-freezing look. Harry had to admire that about his aunt. She was the only person who he had seen who had been able to do this.

"I am done with the garden Aunt Petunia." Harry answered, but as soon as he saw the gleam in her eyes, the one she got when she had a new task for him he quickly added something to his statement.

"Besides, I need to write a letter for my update. Mr. Moody did tell me to contact him every day and since he does not have a telephone I can only owl him. I don't want to anger him by disregarding what he told me to. But if you wish I can do this later."

He watched as his aunt paled a little at the memory of the encounter with Moody, Lupin and Tonks.

"N-No that is alright, you go write your letter. I will be in later to give you your dinner. Now go on, go to your room."

Complying to his aunt Harry walked up the stairs into his bedroom. Well not really his bedroom, since it was still cluttered with Dudley's old toys and books.

"Are you hot girl?" He asked Hedwig. The snowy white owl was sitting on her perch and ruffled her feathers at his question.

"I'll take that as a yes. Still, could you deliver some letters later on? I have to write them first so you probably can leave this evening. Maybe it's cooler outside then."

Now most people would find talking to an owl a sign of madness but Harry knew that Hedwig was a very smart owl, who was able to understand every word he said.

He had been very worried when she had been injured the year before and was happy she was fine now.

Even though he preferred Hagrid as a teacher. Professor Grubbly-Plank did an excellent job of healing his beloved owl.

Harry took a quick shower and put on some clean clothes, even though they were far too large for him. He had to tie his belt around his waist very tight to keep his pants from falling off.

It was now August the 4th and Harry was counting the days until September 1st, the day he would attend his school again.

With a sigh he gathered his quill and some parchment from his trunk to start his letters. This was also new this summer.

For the first time Harry was allowed to keep his trunk in his room as long as all the books and stuff would be out of sight.

Uncle Vernon had been furious when Harry had shown him the letter Moody had written after he found out Harry's trunk had been locked away.

His face had gone all red and his face started to twitch, an explosion seemed inevitable.

However, he seemed to be able to control his temper long enough to shove Harry the key of the cupboard in his hand and leave the house, stomping as he did.

Harry had a busy summer, with all the owls he was getting this year. Besides his daily reports to Moody, he also had to write back to his friends and that never compared to the mail he got from people who only knew him barely or not at all.

Yes, Harry had been a celebrity of some sort but after the way he had been treated by the public the year before, the change seemed so abrupt.

He had learned to leave the window open if didn't want to be disturbed by owls knocking on his window.

He looked to his bed and saw a stack of post laying there waiting for him to read. He decided to get the report out first and started to write a standard letter to Moody.

Yes, everything was all right. No, his relatives had not been mistreating him. And yes, if there was any trouble at all he would signal Mrs. Figg immediately so she could warn the Order.

Finished with that letter he grabbed the stack of letters that was waiting for him. He started to sort them out and made piles of importance.

The ones from Hermione, the Weasely's, Neville, Tonks and strangely enough Luna went on the important stack. The rest he would sort out later.

He opened the one from Hermione first. He rolled his eyes as he read the letter. Once again she was pestering about how he was feeling, his OWL results and if had done his homework. After that she asked him how he was feeling again.

Ron's letters were always the opposite. He avoided talking about emotions of any kind, besides Quidditch and anger about Fred and George after they pulled a joke on him. School was also not discussed and there were just the basic stuff.

Harry threw the two letters on his desk with a sigh of disgust. He hated the way his two best friends had been acting towards him. They were both treating him like some fragile being but then in different ways.

Hermione tried to make him 'open up' to her. To let all his feelings go, to talk about it. On the other hand, Ron was trying to avoid the subject entirely, shielding any negative remarks from his letters and trying to cheer him up.

The subject they were both pushing was Sirius. Or should he Sirius's death only months before.

It was true that he was still very hurt about Sirius's death. Hurt and angry. Angry with Snape, Dumbledore, Lestrange, Voldemort and also angry with himself. It was after all he, who was the reason that the rescue party had to go to the Department of Mysteries.

He shook his head a bit to get the vision of Sirius falling and disappearing behind the veil. He still had nightmares about it, every night he would dream about it and the he would see Sirius but he was yelling at him. Telling him it was his fault he was now dead.

He wrote a short note to Hermione and put in some things in about finishing his homework, talking about his future and disregarding every hint she was giving him in order to talk to her.

His OWL results were quite a surprise for him. He had passed them all for which he was grateful but he had been particularry tense about four subjects. DADA, Transfiguration, Charms and Potions.

After all, Professor McGonnagall had told him that these four subjects were imperative for him if he wanted to pursue his dream to be an auror. And Harry really wanted to become one, especially after all the evil he had seen.

He got an O for DADA, like he had expected. He believed his Patronus had done the trick and smiled at the remembrance of the hours he and Remus had put in to teach him the effective spell.

Also he was very happy after finding out that he had received an E for both Charms as Transfiguration. This meant he was in Professor McGonnagall's Advanced Transfiguration class, a class he needed to become an auror.

The one disappointment was that he had received an A/E for Potions. His mark was right in the middle of A and E so he got half/half. The problem was however that Snape would only accept those who had received an O in Potions for his advanced classes.

At first he believed his dream to become an auror had been shattered but then he had received two letters, one from Professor McGonnagall and one from Snape.

In her letter the Head of his house clearly stated that she had to pull a lot of strings for it, but that Harry still had a chance to be accepted in the advanced Potions class. As long as he would work hard on any work he would be sent he still had a shot at his dream.

He still clearly remembered the final sentences of her letter. 'I am sure you will not let me down and make the expectations I have of you come true. I told you I would assist you to become an auror. Hold on to the dream Harry, for dreams make the future worth while.'

For the past few weeks she had sent him some books as well. They were on advanced Transfiguration and Potions. A small note was added to it. 'It's never too early to start.'

He took her words to heart and he was already studying a lot. He didn't tell Hermione though, he wanted to do this for himself.

For the first time he had also received a birthday-present from her. He was shocked when he unpacked a picture of his father and Sirius in a wooden frame.

When he had opened it he had to swallow to get rid of the lump in his throat. In the picture both figures were laughing hysterically at something and gave each other a high-five of accomplishment.

The picture was underneath his pillow as the Dursley's would not apprecite seeing a moving photograph.

The letter from Snape was very forced. It was obvious that he was not pleased with the position he was in and let it show.

Harry had received a huge amount of extra work from Snape to improve his skills in Potions. Harry was sure he had never written so much for potions before. Every essay had to be at least three feet long and Harry put a lot of effort in his work as to give his hated teacher no reason to exclude him from the class he so much needed.

Every few days he would send Hedwig out with an owl and a school owl would return it to him. His marks were getting better every time. He had climbed from a D to an E and Harry was sure he could get the O before school would start again.

Between his studies and chores Harry had a very busy summer. He was studying at night as well since sleep came infrequent.

The note to Ron was even shorter than that to Hermione, since there was nothing to discuss.

In the same manner he answered the letters of the others as well. The things that were discussed were superficial and Harry avoided every attempt of questioning.

There was a knock on the door and Aunt Petunia handed him a plate of dinner. Harry nodded and took the plate and watched as his aunt left his room quickly again. He ate the salad and potatoes slowly but didn't taste it. Any desire to eat was squashed by the heat and the memory of Sirius.

This was the reason he had gotten thinner this summer. He wasn't starving himself, he was merely eating enough to be able to function.

When the sun started to go down he saw the arrival of a few owls in the distance and waited for them to arrive before sending Hedwig out.

He spotted Pig, Hermes and one of the school owls he found was called Phineas and grimaced at the coincidence. Phineas was after all the name of the great-great-great grandfather of Sirius, the first of the Blacks.

Pig was zooming around and Harry quickly caught him and saw he had no mail. He tied the letters to Ron and Hermione to the tiny owl and let him go again.

This had become normal as well. In stead of the owls waiting in his room for a reply, they would drop off the letters and return later for a reply. He tied the letters for the other Weasely's to Hermes, who was drinking water at that moment before he sent him off as well.

Phineas had returned with the graded essay from Snape and Harry was very please to read he had gotten an E/O. He was getting to his goal. He tied his new essay to the owl's leg and then he disappeared.

That left only a few letters for Hedwig to deliver and she was very happy to be so busy this year.

"Come here girl" said Harry and she hopped on his shoulder and stuck out her left foot out first, later her right foot, in order to give Harry the time to tie the letters to her.

After petting his owl he gave her a final letter in her beak and started to give her instructions.

"You have letters for Moody, Tonks, Neville and Luna. The one for Moody is the most urgent so please deliver that one first will you girl."

Hedwig looked at him with understanding and started to fly out of the window but not before Harry called after her.

"Be careful you hear me."

Harry sighed as he watched his owl soar away until she was nothing but the tiniest dot. He knew he should get some sleep when he heard Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia climb the stairs to get ready for bed.

Those two always stayed up late so it must be after midnight by now. He turned his lights off and tried to sleep but ended up tossing and turning. He sighed and grabbed the mirror Sirius had given him and looked inside it as he said the name clearly.

"Remus Lupin"

He waited for a while for he knew it could be minutes before Remus had a chance to answer him after finding a private spot.

Harry had found that Remus was the only one he could talk with about Sirius or his nightmares or even just his frustrations. Remus was after all mourning as well, Sirius was his best friend.

The two had exchanged long letters in the beginning of the summer until Harry decided it was better to use Sirius's gift and explained the concept of the mirrors to Remus, who on his turn searched the entire house for the second one.

It took him a few days to find it but it was worth it. Harry now spoke face to face with Remus once a day, sometime more. His old professor didn't bother him with stupid questions or trivialities.

He seemed to sense what kind of mood Harry was in and sometimes they would discuss magical theories while Harry would sometimes listen to the stories of the Marauders and the pranks they used to pull.

Even if he felt sorry for Snape at some of the stories, the stories about his father's attempts to capture his mother's attention were always fun to hear. He even got some details no child should know about his parents.

Remus never commented on his tired appearance and for this he was pleased. For his birthday he had sent Harry a lot of gifts, fifteen to be exact. One for every birthday he had missed.

Through the mirror Remus had watched Harry as he unpacked the gifts. Some were small, like Chocolate Frogs or new quills. Others were a little bigger like books about advanced Defence, curses and hexes, a golden ring with a stag on it and a talisman that was supposed to protect you from minor curses.

The biggest gifts, or the best, were a few items. First was a huge album which had 'The Marauder Chronicles' written on the front in bold letters.

Harry was thrilled when Remus explained that there were pictures, written entries and pranks in there. He had to promise not to mutilate the pictures of Peter though and when he asked why he got a firm answer.

"Peter was a nice boy and during those seven years at Hogwarts there wasn't a moment I wouldn't call him my friend. It was after our school-years that he started to turn on us. The Peter in the pictures has died, all that is left now is the treacherous Wormtail."

This was a good enough explanation for Harry and he reached for his last present and gasped when he saw a Pensieve. He had stuttered that this was far too valuable of a present to give him but Remus had been insistent.

"I am not the richest man alive but I think I know better than you what I can afford. Now I want you to use this whenever things get too much for you. Placing thoughts in a pensieve is on the line of using magic so don't do it too often though."

Harry was thinking about another conversation when he suddenly heard a muffled voice from his mirror.

"Are you there Harry? Harry?"

He picked up the mirror quickly and put his glasses on again so he could see Remus's face.

"I'm here, sorry I was a little distracted."

Remus smiled and Harry felt himself at ease. "It's all right, it took me a while to escape the clutches of Tonks. She insisted on following me to help and clean the kitchen."

"So she is still concerned about you?" Harry asked.

Remus rubbed his eyes and looked a little frustrated. "Yes, it seems to be so. Though Dung had a remark today that I hadn't even considered. By Merlin, I hope he is wrong about it."

"What did he say?" Harry was eager to hear this, Dung was a little strange but he found he could make him laugh sometimes.

"Well" said Remus "Dung has this crazy idea in his head that the reason for Tonks's concern is that and I quote: She must have fallen head over feet with me for I am a highly eligible bachelor with dashingly good looks and wants to hold me as I mourn for my fallen friend. Unquote."

Harry couldn't help it, he started to laugh, not too loud though for didn't want to wake his relatives up. When Remus sent him an evil glare he found himself shaking as he clutched his stomach, which was aching by now by all the restraint he had to put in place.

Once he calmed down a little he was able to talk again. "Why would you hope that it's not true? After all, you are a highly eligible bachelor with dashingly good looks. There is no way she wouldn't fall for you."

"Not funny young man." Said Remus. "I'm serious about this. Tonks is much younger than I am and add to me being a werewolf and the fact I have no romantic feelings for her, you see my problem now?"

Harry thought for a while before he answered. "Maybe you should let it rest, hope that it's a silly crush or something that will pass. She doesn't blush every time she sees you or giggles a lot does she? Cause that annoys me to no end."

"Got some experience with it Harry?" Remus teased.

"Shut up" Harry muttered "It's not my fault there are stupid girls out there who do not see that I hate all the being famous crap. Do you know that I have got fanmail this summer. Fanmail!"

Remus seemed amused. "Yes, you told me this. Several times actually. The only thing I can tell you is to be you. You can't be what everyone wants you to be you know."

"Something else, do you know who will teach DADA this year, are you coming back?"

"No, I have other business to attend to with the Order and all. I can tell you that you will like this teacher. He is very capable at what he does and is very opposed to Voldemort so you should not worry about that."

Remus noted that Harry started to look sleepy and ended the conversation. "You should catch some sleep. If you have a nightmare do not hesitate to call me all right?"

"Sure Remus, goodnight." Harry said.

"Night Harry." And with that the mirror went blank again, only reflecting Harry's face again.

He put the mirror away and closed his eyes, hoping for a dreamless sleep for once.

A/N: Well, is it terrible? Should I stop? Please let me know ok? This is my first HP fic so I have no idea what you guys think. I've been reading it for a while now but reading and writing is very different. Leave me a review even if you think it sucks.