The Defensive Space Force Ship Requirement

Harry Potter, and the rest of Dumbledore's Army in his fifth year, use the Room of Requirement to get themselves a spaceship! The problems of a tiny island on Earth don't seem so important, anymore. Wizards in Space! What could possibly go wrong with that?

Eventually, this will be a crossover with Stargate SG-1.

Like all fanfiction, I post this work at Fanfiction Net with the kind forbearance of the owners of the Harry Potter franchise, J.K. Rowling, and her publishers. I claim nothing of note, as removing all references to her Harry Potter universe would render my story nonsensical. Not to mention unreadable.

Similarly, the universe of Stargate is the property of Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, and removing any references to their creation would render this work puzzling, as well as unreadable.

Inspired by the excellent stories D.S.S. Requirement and D.S.S. Enterprise by esama. Unfortunately, she has abandoned the story series. However, she says in her Profile on A3O: "People can, if they want to, write sequels or prequels or whatever, take the plots and the characters and run with them, do their own versions . . .. Just, no copy-paste-reposting." — esama

This story closely follows, at first, the plot of the original, but with significant deviations and changes. Parts I & II are extensively rewritten, and the word count nearly doubled.

P.S. It's sad when the legal caveats are so much longer than the story description.

Part I — The Room

Ch. 1 — Room of Requirement

It was the twenty-third, nearly the end of October. The third meeting of Dumbledore's Army was that night. Harry wasn't as nervous as he had been the first two times. He tried to be the first to arrive at the Room of Requirement, with Ron and Hermione, on those nights they had a D.A. session. Not that there was a lot to do — it took only a few moments' thought to get the room the way he wanted it for that night's spell practice.

Today, he had decided to skive off the late afternoon Astronomy lesson (theoretical only) and hit the Room, instead. And he wanted to think a bit about Cho. She confused him just by looking at him. Why was that? She could make him blush with just a look!

Plus, his dreams had been getting worse lately. Not in subject matter, just more frequent. His scar hurt almost all the time, which sometimes made it difficult to concentrate. The detentions with the Pink Toad hadn't made it any easier. And the anger. He always seemed to be angry. He nearly lost his temper at the slightest provocation — no matter how trivial.

Now his hand ached almost as much as his scar.

Finding someone already there surprised him.

It was Fred, trying, and failing, to look casual as he leaned on the corridor wall just before the intersection to the corridor with the tapestry of Barnabas the Barmy being clubbed by trolls in ballerina costumes. He was reading a book — upside down.

"Hello, Fred," Harry said, slowing his steps cautiously. Actually, it didn't matter what he called the twins. If it was actually George, there, he wouldn't admit it. And if it was Fred, then not saying he was George just made it all the more confusing.

However, a Weasley twin lounging in a corridor and apparently doing nothing sent little warning bells off in his mind. As should such a sight for anyone who knew about them — especially so for those who actually did know them!

"Oh." Fred looked disappointed. "Hi, Harry. Didn't think anyone would be interested at this time," he said, then sighed and closed the book.

Harry looked around and tried to spot George. "What're you doing?"

The teen gave Harry a guileless smile, "Oh," he said in an offhand manner, "nothing interesting, just . . . mucking about." He buffed his right-hand's fingernails against his robe.

He didn't fool Harry one bit. He shuddered at what the twins might be doing with the resources of the nearly limitless Room of Requirement.

Fred shoved his book into his rucksack after a quick look. He grinned boisterously. "We'll just do it . . . later, when it won't inconvenience anyone," he said airily.

"Hm," Harry said with narrowed eyes; that worried him even more. He slipped passed Fred and looked down the other corridor. Surprisingly, there wasn't a door in the wall opposite the troll tapestry. Instead, Lee Jordan was pacing back and forth in front of it while George watched, clearly puzzled at what his friend was doing.

Lee was massaging his temples with his thumbs and his face was scrunched up in concentration as he paced.

Apparently, what he wanted was either something the Room couldn't do, or he had only a fuzzy idea of what he wanted. Something too vague for the Room to create.

George looked over at hearing Harry's footsteps. "Oh. Wotcher, Harry," he said.

Harry sighed, exasperated. All he wanted was a little time alone, to think. He smothered the urge to start yelling. It wasn't their fault he was having difficulties. "Hi, George, Lee. What's up?"

"The ceiling," said George.

"The roof," said Fred, behind him.

Harry just blankly stared back and forth between them.

"Nothing bad, honest!" Fred said defensively.

"We just wanted to see what the Room could really do," said George.

"You know, what all it can . . . show us?"

"We were going to return it to the D.A. room when we were done."

"And we made sure no one was anywhere near here, so the secret is safe," finished Fred.

"Ah," Harry said slowly, nodding his head, then shaking it. He still had no idea what they were talking about.

"Come on," said George reprovingly, "Everyone wants to see what it can do."

"You can't say you haven't been tempted, yourself, can you?" Fred added.

Harry shook his head and arched an eyebrow. "Actually, I can say that I haven't. The Room delivered exactly what I needed it to," Harry said. He sighed. "Why would I need anything else?"

The twins shook their heads sadly, synchronized, as usual. It was rather weird.

Fred said, "Oh ye of little imagination."

George clapped his hand on Harry's. "You should broaden your mind a bit."

"We've so far gotten to experience a roller coaster, a water park . . ."

"Who knew water could be so much fun?"

". . . and a room that was all upwards-down and everything."

"And yesterday we made a room with an ice floor and skated inside it, it was pretty cool."

"Not to mention that the Room doesn't seem to have a size limit."

"We managed a broom race in it and never hit the walls!" finished George.

That was quite impressive actually. That would be useful, to be able to fly without fear of the Pink Toad seeing him. Knowing the Room, though, it probably held them still and made the area around them look as if it were moving past rapidly, and that they were far apart. Still, even the semblance of such carefree flying with fear of discovery was distractingly appealing.

"When did you start doing this?" Harry said, a bit annoyed. He didn't mind them learning about the Room and having fun, but if they got caught hanging around this spot, it might blow the whole "keep it a secret" aspect of the D.A. And the more they hung around the corridor, the more likely it was that that would happen.

Fred looked down sheepishly, "Not all that long, really."

"A couple of days, at most . . . two or three," added George.

At Harry's sceptical look, Fred weakly said, "Would you believe five or six?" He looked up hopefully.

Harry rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"Okay, the last two weeks."

"We've been really careful. We put a notice-me-not on the wall when we're inside,"

"And we carefully scout the area before we start."

"We wouldn't want anyone to discover the secret."

"At all!"

"It makes a spiffing spot to experiment with . . .," they exchanged glances, "things."

Which Harry knew meant their products for their planned business.

"And we set alert charms to warn us if anyone even comes close while we're inside."

They looked at him earnestly

Harry sighed, shook his head in resignation, and looked down the corridor. "So, what's Lee up to?" Jordan was on his fourth attempt at whatever he was doing since Harry had arrived. Still no door, still no joy.

"Don't know," Fred said.

"Won't say." George shrugged.

"Having a spot of trouble there, our Lee is."

"Me-thinks his mental prowess isn't that great."

Lee snorted, and glanced back at them. They hadn't been whispering and he had clearly heard everything they had said. "Shut your gobs, you wankers. I'm working here." He appeared in pain the way he screwed up his face.

Harry sighed, yet again. His scar was starting to throb.

The twins were glancing back and forth between Lee and him. Clearly, they expected him to order Lee to quit it. Although why they thought he had any more right to the room right now than they did left him puzzled.

He closed his eyes and wished his headache would go away, or that he was somewhere where Voldemort's emotions couldn't reach him. The scar's pain had expanded to behind his eyes. Anywhere was better than here right now. He stepped past Lee, and paced in front of the wall the necessary three times. Just give Lee what he wants, Harry thought emphatically walking in a small circle, still wishing faintly that he was far, far away from Tom and whatever was causing his headache.

The three seventh year's looked disappointed. From their expressions, he could tell they clearly thought he had dismissed their fun for the day, and was calling for the D.A. room.

They were all surprised when a wall appeared in the stone wall opposite the tapestry. It was an oval-shaped, recessed, metal wall with a shiny steel rim. There were no traces of either a handle or a seam.

"Yes!" Lee cried, pumping his arm in triumph. "Thanks, Harry! I don't know what you did, but thanks!" He stepped towards the metal wall. "And thanks for not simply ignoring my . . . wish, desire, dream?" He clapped Harry on the shoulder as the others stared at the door, confused.

"What?" Harry said, echoed by George and Fred who had stepped closer.

Lee ignored them and walked straight at the metal wall — which was a door, they saw, as it split diagonally in the middle, the two halves sliding silently into the walls. Whatever was on the other side of the door was dark. Lee confidently walked inside, and they heard him cast a lumos.

Then Harry realised what Lee had wanted. "No way," he murmured incredulously. He cast his own lumos and quickly followed Lee. "No WAY," he said louder as he walked inside and got a good look. It was a metal corridor, a vaulted, trapezoidal one at least four yards high, maybe five, wider at the bottom than the top. It had glowing designs, runes probably, Harry realized, carved into the steel walls at regular intervals beside closed doors. Lee was farther down the strange, polished corridor, and had walked through a door that had just opened for him. Harry hurried after him and into the open space beyond.

"No way," he half-shouted as he looked out the enormous window that made up the entire wall of the opposite side of the large hall. He barely noticed the odd tables with glass-like tops, and their chairs, that were arranged across room. Considering the time of day, and year, it should have shown a view of the lake beside Hogwarts in early twilight.

Except it didn't.

Instead, he could see thousands of stars, maybe millions, far more than he had ever seen before. And no trace of a lake, ground, trees, or mountains.

"Blo-ody hell," Harry breathed. He turned his head to look at Lee, wide-eyed, slack-jawed, and gobsmacked.

Lee grinned back at him, eyes sparkling. He hurried to the window and stopped. Then he reached out to touch it, to lean closer and see if there was anything visible this close to the window that he couldn't see from the hall door. He yelped and jerked his hand back. The window wasn't made of glass, but some sort of energy. Or there was an energy barrier in front of the window. In any case, as if he had touched a metal door-knob after sliding his feet across a rug, it had sparked at him. The dark-skinned wizard shook his hand absentmindedly. " 'Cor," he murmured, looking all around out the window. Harry wasn't sure he had noticed that the "window" had just shocked him.

"How . . . ?" Harry asked, following over to join Lee. Dark, star-speckled space met his eyes — until he noticed the arc of light that seemed to be below them. It wasn't that close, just an irregular spot of black the size of his thumb, with a partial arc of light alongside one end. Its shape blotted out the stars they should have been able to see. "Is . . . is that an asteroid?" he whispered. He could see the arc of light changing, as if the object were rotating.

"Huh?" Lee asked, looking around. He grinned as he saw where Harry was looking. "This. Is. Unbelievable!" he crowed, throwing both hands up over his head in triumph.

"Well, my good fellows," George said in a pompous tone as he came up behind them. He placed his arm over Lee's shoulders.

Fred placed his arms over Harry's shoulders and leaned against him, propping his chin on Harry's head. "Perhaps you could tell us what you're going on about?"

"You poor, poor, pure-bloods," Lee said sadly, shaking his head. He shrugged off George's arm and turned to face the three. "You, my mates," he announced grandiosely, "are on a spaceship!" He spread his arms wide. "Welcome!" he cried, and turned to look out the window, again. He sighed happily and dropped his arms to his sides.

"What?" Fred and George said. They looked at each other, puzzled. "We're on a what?"

"A spaceship. A ship. In space. Not a ship on the sea. Space, a SPACESHIP!" Lee said enthusiastically. He was almost giddy with the realization of it. "See, I told you muggles went into space, right? . . .." He took off trying to explain the whole concept of outer-space and science-fiction to two pure-bloods whose only idea of open space was the area below their brooms when they fell off them. Or their jokes about what was between Ron's ears.

Harry sighed and looked back out the window. Listening to Lee as he started off into Star Trek and Star Wars, the young teen was beginning to realize that this was the Room of Requirement. The excitement was fading out and reality was slowly fading in.

They weren't in space. They were still in the Room of Requirement. It was a truly amazing simulation that certainly looked like the real thing, but it wasn't.

The Room of Requirement had made just what Lee had asked it do. It had created a simulation of a spaceship in space. Like the Holodeck on Star Trek's Enterprise, it looked like the real thing, except it wasn't. The moment they left the room, it would go away.

And it was hardly realistic, too. God forbid the Durselys would ever have taken him to a film theatre, much less to see something as ridiculous as science-fiction. But he had seen pictures and drawings, and heard a bit from the telly while he was locked in his cupboard. He hadn't even read any of it, it wasn't exactly a hot topic in primary, and the local library had banned him ever since Dudley had destroyed a dozen books and blamed it him. But, just from the little he had seen on the telly during documentaries he knew that actual spaceships were cramped beyond belief. They most certainly didn't have gravity like this room did. If they were in space right now, he expected that they would be floating around the room, flailing awkwardly, trying to reach a wall to get back out. And definitely not walking around as if they were wandering in the Great Hall here at Hogwarts.

This was just a copy of something Lee had seen somewhere. But that didn't make it any less amazing. But that was all it was — a copy. He wondered if he could change the view, like he had added tables and chairs when he needed them, previously, in the Room. He concentrated on a picture he had seen, once, of earth with the moon at one side.

Nothing happened.

"Okay," he heard one of the twins say. He looked over at Fred who was standing with his arms folded in a mirror copy of George. "You're saying we aren't in the castle anymore, but in a . . . ship. In space."

Lee nodded eagerly.

Fred stroked his chin thoughtfully. "I'm not buying it," he said slowly. "I'm pretty sure there's no air in outer space."

Lee rolled his eyes. "Come on guys, clearly a spaceship has its own air inside it. It's made to keep it that way. Use your brains, I know you got them," Lee said sarcastically.

"And we're not floating about because . . .?"

"Artificial gravity. It's like the opposite of a levitation charm, but muggle."

George's eyebrows shot up. "Muggles can do that?"

"Well, no. No, they can't," Lee reluctantly admitted. He waved his arms around, indicating everything around them. "It's not as if this place was actually made by muggles, you know. It's not really real or anything."

"It's . . . not . . . a spaceship?" Fred said warily.

"It's a fakeship," George said accusingly.

"Stop being prats!" Lee said irritably. "It's not a fakeship, no more than the D.A. training room is a fake training room. It still does the proper job, doesn't it?" He stared at them challengingly. "It is a spaceship, just . . . not a real one. It's a . . . sci-fi spaceship, that's all." Lee made a face at them. "Come on, mates, stop spoiling this for me. Harry?"

"Hm?" Harry said. "Oh, yeah. Ace," he said obligingly, dragging his gaze from the magnificent view and over at the twins. "The Duck test, ya know? 'If it walks like a duck, looks like a duck, quacks like a duck — then it's probably a duck.'"

The other three looked at him as if he'd gone as barmy as the wizard in the tapestry outside the Room.

"Er, something my uncle once told me one of his clients used to say," he muttered. He frowned. "In view of polyjuice and an obsessive fanatic, probably not all that accurate for people." His frown deepened. "Or animagi, either." He paused. "Or illusions, if you could keep people from touching you. Then there's self-transfiguration . . .," his voice trailed off as he stared at the floor thinking.

He looked back up and cleared his throat. "So," he said brightly, "Is this from Doctor Who?" At Lee's glare he shrunk back a little. "Or something?"

After a final glare, Lee said, "Nope." He sighed. "I thought I'd mess the details for Star Trek, and then it would bug me. I just wanted a . . . random, generic spaceship, I guess."

Harry slowly nodded.

Lee shrugged, then got an excited look. He clapped enthusiastically and started for the Hall door. "The engines! Let's find the engines!"

Harry hesitated. He wanted some time alone. But then, he realized, his scar didn't hurt! In fact, there wasn't even a twinge from it. He reached up to touch it, but nothing happened when he did. No pain, no throbbing, not even an itch. If it weren't for a slight residual ache when he pressed on it, he wouldn't even know it was there.

And the simmering anger that dogged his every waking moment was gone, as well.

He grinned. Maybe it was time for a bit of carefree fun. He set out with a rather jaunty step after the older teen. For once, he was in a good mood.

Fred and George tagged along behind him, still a bit confused, as they started searching for the ship's engine room.

The corridors and rooms in the ship were all dark. Only the periodic, faintly glowing symbols provided any illumination. They obviously were supposed to be ancient runes — Harry thought he recognized one or two every now and then that looked sort of like the things that he had seen in Hermione's assignments. He shook his head at the thought of magical runes on a technology-based spaceship. He had to pity the Room of Requirement, resorting to magical means to simulate a science-fiction spaceship. Still, looking around at what they found, the Room had done a pretty credible job. Or, at least, he thought so. A real science-fiction fan, not to mention a real scientist, would probably find no end of things to criticize.

On the other hand, Harry could only watch, amused, as Lee hunted for the engine-room and the twins looked for anything interesting

It was not a small ship, by any means. Lee had managed to make the Room into the biggest thing yet. The twins' racing arena was probably the next closest. Corridors kept intersecting with corridors, room after room after room lined each corridor on both sides.

Some were small rooms, barely bigger than a broom-closet. Others were classroom-sized. Some were huge and matched the length of the current corridor the wizards were in. Most contained those strange glass-topped tables with weird symbols and peculiar stones on them. Some were simply empty.

Not every room had windows, but the rooms that did had spectacular views. The stars were unlike any he had ever seen — sharp, bright, steady stars in clear colours. Not even through the telescopes in Astronomy class had he seen so many, so bright, stars.

Lee shrugged when Harry mentioned it. "I suppose it's because we aren't seeing them through the atmosphere," he said. "I saw a comparison photo of the Crab Nebulae from Earth and from the Hubble. Night and day, Harry, night and day." He sighed sadly. "Pity we aren't anywhere near Earth — it would've been unspeakably awesome to see it from space."

It was Harry's turn to shrug. "What's Earth looks from space — do you know?"

Lee shook his head.

"I guess the Room didn't have any idea either."

One room, they were all relieved to find, was a water-closet area with toilets and sinks.

One corridor had one side lined with windowed small rooms that were clearly bedrooms. Storage drawers were evident below a generously wide and almost hip-high platform — clearly a bed of some kind — with a small table and chair nearby. The bed was remarkably soft, but there were no covers.

The rooms were paired to share a bathroom between them.

Another corridor had a row of small bedrooms, barely bigger than his at the Dursleys, formerly Dudley's Second Bedroom. There was a communal bathroom centred on either side of the corridor. Still another was bracketed by two rooms lined with triple-high bunk beds and a large communal bathroom in each — obviously a set of barracks.

The double-occupancy rooms, and barracks rooms, did not have windows.

"Boring! Boring! Boring!" George eventually complained, after peering into another room with pedestal tables.

"Why is it so dark in here, anyway?" Fred grumbled.

"We can't see anything," whinged George.

"Not that there's anything interesting to see anyway," Fred said dryly.

"Just corridors and rooms and stars."

"I'll give the stars, though. That's brill."

"How is this in any way . . . exciting?"

"You're both daft cows . . . this is exciting" Lee answered. "You uncultured, uneducated, uninformed swine."

"Blow me!" Fred answered agreeably.

"I keep telling you, you aren't my type! I prefer them smart, sexy, and beautiful."

Fred blew a raspberry at him.

They looked into another room. This one had rows of long tables with benches. There was a tall stack of trays in corner on a counter. They had found a dining hall. But oddly, there was no sign of a kitchen. Was it like the Great Hall where meals were prepared elsewhere and then transferred here?

"Berks," said Lee

"Ponce," said George.

"Duff," said Fred.

"Twits."

"Nancy."

"Todger."

Harry rolled his eyes, they were trading insults much the way someone would discuss the weather.

"Tossers."

"Prat."

"Swot."

"Gobshites."

There was a moment of silence, then Fred said, "Well, now that that's sorted . . . seriously, though, what's the point of this?"

"It's a spaceship," Lee explained with more than a bit of exasperation. He stopped and stood with his hands on his hips. "That's the point," he growled. He stared at them for a moment. "You know, if you find it all that tedious, get stuffed! Or shut your gobs."

Fred sighed tiredly, and said, "Well, we're already here."

George clasped his hands behind his neck and peered at the ceiling. He said, as if it were a great concession on his part, "I suppose we should see the rest."

"Find out what's so special about . . . enguines."

"Engines," Harry corrected him.

There was another moment of silence as they checked the next room. A smaller meals-hall, also with trays in one corner but still without an attached kitchen.

"Why is it so dark in here?" Harry said to Lee. "Did you want a dark spaceship?"

"A darkship?" said George.

"A dorkship?" said Fred.

Lee glared at the twins. "No," he said coldly. Then he sighed. "But then I didn't really specify that I wanted it to be well-lit, either," He shrugged. "Stop pissing and moaning, you twats. It's not like we don't have wands, after all."

"Your fakeship sucks, Lee."

"Shut up . . . wanker."

They wandered for quite some time before they found what was most likely the engine room. Or . . . what Harry and Lee thought it might be. It was the biggest room they'd seen so far. It was two or three stories tall — and they were on the first floor for it. There was an enormous crystal pillar thing, easily as big around as Hagrid, in the middle of the room. The pillar stretched from the ceiling above them to floor below them. Cat-walks and platforms were arranged around it, with the requisite pedestal tables, of course. There were angled counters on the exterior walls. It all looked very complicated.

"Looks knackered," George commented.

"Hm," Lee agreed with a nod. He frowned and leaned onto a railing. He peered at the bottom of the enormous room. The pillar and room below were dark, and his wand did little to illuminate either. "Busted or turned off." He straightened and looked up at the ceiling far above. "Wonder if we can fix it . . .," he mused.

"It's not real, you know," Fred said.

"I swear to god, Fred, I will hex you." He turned and glared at the twin.

"It's strange, though, isn't it?" Harry said, idly. "Why would it be busted, when this is just a simulation of a spaceship. What's the point in simulating a broken spaceship? The Room could just have well made it look as if it were running, even if it wasn't."

"Evidence of Lee's poor imagination skills?" Fred said. Then dodged as Lee sent a hex at him

George shrugged. "Must be a limit to what the Room can do. Be the first time we hit a limit. Maybe it just can't do something like whatever this is on top of creating the rest of this giant spaceship," George said, folding his arms and shoulder bumping his twin. "Space . . . get it? Cause it's certainly been empty of anything interesting."

"Certainly no cheese," grumbled Lee, and crossed his arms as he turned in a circle and examined the room.

"Maybe making it appear broken was easier?" Fred said, glancing slyly out of the corners of his eyes at Lee and giving his brother a smirk.

"Might be," Lee said glumly. He perked up. "Still, this place is so . . . wicked. I wonder if we . . . I dunno . . . could maybe fix it?"

"It's not re-al," Fred said in singsong tone.

Lee frowned and sighed. "Not literally, you prat. Fix the simulation. Look," he said and waved his hands at the walls. "There are runes everywhere, maybe we could help the Room along . . . or something." Lee said. "Even if it's not real, it would be neat if we could . . .," he shrugged, "make it work? Maybe even actually pilot it?"

"What? Pilot it?" Fred said sceptically. "Like, make it move? Like a boat?"

"It's in the name . . . spaceship," Lee said, scathingly. "They're meant to move, by definition. Otherwise, it would be a space-station."

The twins looked at each other, then shrugged.

Harry looked at his watch. "It's kind of getting late, almost time for dinner." He looked back up at them. "We should probably start to head back. You can work on that stuff, later, Lee, I really don't care. You three have as much right to the Room of Requirement as I do, but we'll draw attention if we start missing meals. If the Pink Toad starts watching you, she'll find the Room."

"Yeah, sure," Lee said, giving him a thoughtful look. He glanced at a nearby wall and the ancient runes on it. "I'm gonna have to bring my runes dictionary, next time," he said, and sighed. They turned and headed for the Engine Room door. He gave one last regretful look at room as they exited.

Harry stopped in the corridor and looked at the others with a puzzled expression. "Does anyone remember where the door to this thing is?"

They stared at each other in silence.

"Oh, bloody hell . . .."

Harry's scar started hurting almost as soon as they returned to the castle proper, and his serenity dissipated as they rushed to the Great Hall.

They barely made it to there for a hasty meal before dinner was over.

It was still a good D.A. meeting that night, however.

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