Disclaimer: Don't own anything.not even Speed.

Rating: PG

Spoiler: Freaks & Tweaks

Summary: " God your beautiful." he replies back and that's the last straw that breaks the camel's back.

Pairing: Okay.this will come as a shock to most of you who know I'm a firm grounded Speed/Calleigh shipper.but I just wanna see what the fuss is all about so I'm writing a Horatio/Calleigh story.hope I don't suck too much.

A/N: All I gotta say is SPEED PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!!

Dedication: To Marianne.I don't think I have to go any further than that.

***

Could you be lost

are you so free, do you long to be

you know it's such a mystery how you washed up over me

and I couldn't speak, I couldn't breathe, lest I drown

but it's my kind

I'll never be cruel and I'll always play the fool

to be as loveless, as shameless as you.

But I'm so blind

I'll do it again I feel your eyes sink in

so faithless as you've been.

Yes I'm so lost

I am not free but I long to be

when life goes down, Do you fell as though you're gonna drown

you're going down

"Faithless" By Injected

***

Charismatic Features 1/1

You stare at the man besides you and you wonder.

He's peaceful in his sleep.doesn't let you out of his sight even with his eyes closed.

You wonder how you got here but at the same time you already know.

It's because your in love.and you have been for quite sometime now, but what has kept you away is that little voice inside your head that whispered, " He doesn't need you."

And you just let it guide you, until he showed up at your door.

He hadn't formed any coherent words.and probably couldn't.his breath smelled like cigarettes and beer but he wasn't drunk.

The clarity in his eyes guided him to your place.and into you.

He saw right through you.and you remembered the time that Speed explained to you about the three stages of radiation.

His eyes are like gamma.they see right through you.

You remember the conversation last night.as if it were yesterday.and hell it was yesterday but you keep forgetting that.

You keep thinking that this is all a dream and you'll wake tomorrow morning for your jog and realize that the man that laid besides you in your bed was just a figment of your imagination, nothing more, nothing less.

And you'll put on your sweats and sneakers and run like the wind, hoping to escape all knowledge of your love for this man; this wonderful man, who lacks neither in physical appearance or emotional.

When you do in both.

Or at least so you've been told most of your life.

Then you remember your father's words.

" Your much too pretty to work as hard as you do."

That's why you kept him around.selfishly.so you could keep hearing those lies, thinking they'd bring you release.you were wrong.

You might keep him around for that. But the pain in your heart.from what he'd done to you in the past will always dominate any feeling of compassion you feel for that disturbed man.

Granted he's your father but you don't care.

And as you turn on your side and watch the wonderful man beside you sleep, you try to understand why he came to your door last night.

Something about Ray.his brother?

Something about Tin Man, and drugs?

Then you remember Delko telling you about the barn explosion and how H almost assaulted the guy they took in for the murder of his friends.and some woman named Suzie.

You don't quite remember now, but you don't care, because you figure since it led him to come to your door last night, that it must all be a dream just like his late night come-in.

You also can't quite remember how he looked last night.

Was he disheveled and worn out?

Had he been crying?

You don't remember, because all you recall is his presence.and you obvious urge to vomit from the anxiety built up inside you when you saw him.

Why had he come to you? That question still remains unanswered in your mind.

Why not Yelena? Why not his sister-in-law who probably shares in his pain.it was her husband after all, why not Yelena?

You fear the worst as you watch him.

His cheek on the pillow besides you, dangerously close, you cant feel his breath on your neck and it scares you too, because you find yourself wondering that you can get used to this.

Hell, you already are used to it.

But then you think, Jesus Christ, he's my boss.and all the stirring left unsatisfied is out of the question and you just watch him.

Memorize everything about him mentally; knowing with you luck this will never happen again.

His chest heaves as breathes in an out.sharing your air space.oh lord.

He's surprisingly tanned, but you figured since he's lived in Miami all his life, that shouldn't be unanticipated.

And his shoulders are lined with small freckles and you just want to kiss them away.remembering what your mother had told you in one of her better days.

"Having freckles means the sun has kissed you."

And you smile and then frown when you remember what she followed it up as, " Your so pale Calleigh."

Thanks mother, you sarcastically replied and somehow that tiny gesture left you hating her even more.

You return to memorizing him. This gives you pure bliss.

Pallid cheeks tinted with light blush from the humidity of the day and his obvious alcohol intake.

His thick head of gorgeously colored red hair, not a gray in the bunch.you just want to reach out and touch it.

......

And before you know it you are.Jesus Christ, you scream internally, and before you can have the chance to rectify your situation, he lightly grabs your wrist.

You're sure that your face now matches the scarlet sheets.and you feel embarrassed.

He surprisingly smiles at you.

Guilty as charged his grin says.and you cant remember the last time he smiled, and not because your buzzed with euphoria at the moment but because he seldom does.

" Caught you in the act didn't I?" he teases, and you blush even further.

" Sorry." You sheepishly reply in an attempt to redeem your actions but he just smiles that annoying grin at you again and shakes his head against the pillow.

His nose caressing your shoulder.you feel goose bumps coming on, and it's not an overly enjoyable experience.you feel like one of his suspects.on of the people he's interrogating.

You feel put on the spot.

" Don't be.lying here beside you.watching you asleep I would've' probably done the same thing." He rises up on his elbow.and you hope that in the darkness of the room his probing blues don't catch the confusion in yours.

But they do.

And neither of you say anything anyway.he's studying you.you can feel it.and you don't want to.

You picture his eyes gliding over your blonde hair.then your forehead.then your eyes and nose.then your lips.down to your neck.stopping at your breasts.and then sauntering back to your lips again.

" Oh my god." You wonder, " What is he gonna do?"

And then you get your answer in a chaste kiss.

He does the unthinkable and pulls you against him, his lips lingering on yours.and then you freeze.

" Do something Calleigh." You yell at yourself, but like so many times before, you don't listen.

You remain still.your heart's in your throat again and he leans down and kisses your pulse spot.

You moan.

Jesus Christ.

You didn't sign up for this when you let him sleep in the same bed with you.never.

" Horatio." You moan his name into his ear for the sake of stopping but in vain.you excite him more.

" God your beautiful." he replies back and that's the last straw that breaks the camel's back.

You push him off you.and catch your breath.

" We shouldn't be doing this." You tell him with some sort of conviction but very unpersuasive to both of you.

He takes a deep breath too.in hopes of stopping himself from feeling this way.or at least so you assume.and then he replies.

" Your right." He runs a hand through his hair.and you have the urge to reach out again and substitute his hand but you don't.

" I am right." You pause.because you just realized your mistake.that didn't come out as a credible statement but as a question.

Good Lord help you.

" Yeah you are. I'm your boss. we work together." His voice trails off.and you know he remains just as unconvinced as you.

" So we're doing the right thing. we'll just go back to sleep. and forget this whole thing ever happened." You set a tone and he doesn't reply for a long time.you wonder if he's heard you.

" I don't think I can do that Cal." He explains and you wonder why.

" How come?"

" Because I love you." He stuns you.

Your heart is neither beating nor is it still.

Your mouth is neither agape nor is it closed.

Your eyes are neither wide shut, nor wide open.

And then you remember the tiny patches of sun kissed skin on his shoulders.and you have no choice but to reply.

" I love you too H."

***

Okay.*awkward silence*.I hope you guys liked it.I honestly hope you did.please R&R and lemme know if I should just stick to my Speed.

yana