Disclaimer: Don't own anything…Lyrics by Dido
Pairing: Eric/OC, Speed/Calleigh, Horatio/Megan, John/Adele
Summary: *singing happily* and finally the end is here, and we face the final bidding *god I love that Ebay commercial* NOT SPOILING ANYTHING FOR YA!!!
Spoiler: Losing Face, Tinder Box, Body Count
A/N: In honor of this beautiful masterpiece I am titling the last chapter 'Slightly Condoned' as well, however, this is NOT the last that you'll hear from me, or these characters. As you will find out in the upcoming pages I didn't leave everything peachy keen.
Dedication: To the CSI_Miami_Fic list, and to every one who reviewed on fanfiction.net and of course to Dorothy who posted this fic on her website, which by the way is 'da bomb'.
Touch my skin and tell me what your thinking
Take my hand and show me where we're going
Lie down next to me, look into my eyes
And tell me; oh tell me what you're seeing
Part 30- Slightly Condoned
" Meg who's at the door." Tim came out of the bathroom about ten minutes later, oblivious, to the speechless exchange taking place right in his hallway.
He was just about to fix the collar of his blue plaid when he encountered his boss and mentor silently boring holes in each other's eyes, but analyzing the situation further any one who knew those two as personally as Speedle did, could tell the unresolved sexual tension and the problems ensued by it, were taking a toll on them.
When neither investigator moved, Speed cleared his throat, " Uh, Hey H, should I run and hide now or later?"
The sarcasm tinting his voice heavily didn't lighten the situation at hand, instead it probably stressed the matter even more so then before.
Megan's complexion had been extremely pallid before, but now it looked sickly white, almost translucent, whether as Horatio never looked more impish in his life, and probably by no fault of his own.
He could've been mad all he wanted, but Speedle concluded he was devilishly happy and aroused by Megan's return, it held great possibilities.
He cleared his throat again almost as simultaneously as he reached for his gun, and badge, trying desperately quickly to escape the anxiety that filled the air.
" So I'll take the unabashed silence as a yes, and be on my way, I have a cold case to crack." Speed laughed nervously, the only sound that quickly emaciated into the thick tension rising above the duo.
It was apparent that he was just talking to himself, so he decided not to even consider saying good bye, as he slipped passed Horatio and out of his apartment, never believing he'd once be so delighted to escape its confines.
When he was out of sight for the red-haired man momentarily staring after his departing form, Horatio turned to Megan and smiled a little ruthlessly.
" So aren't you going to invite me in, or are you gonna continue hiding away from me?"
Megan didn't say anything in return, although her expression read enough as she simply turned around and disappeared into the apartment, leaving Horatio to decide for himself if he wanted to join her or not.
There was no doubt in her mind that he would, because that was the difference between them.
He was strong, and he faced his problems, and she was weak, and she didn't, but for some reason he stuck around for her, and being the frail one in the relationship, she was powerless to stop him…
So sit on top of the world
And tell me how you're feeling
What you feel, is what I feel for you
Placing the empty plastic cup into the trashcan at the foot of her desk, positioned underneath the paper shredder, Adele tried desperately to ignore the digital clock situated in the right corner of the table.
The seconds raced trying to beat their own accord outwit each other, in some sort of masked foreplay to force the minutes to follow them, and then the hours.
The ring of the telephone on her desk awakened Det. Sevilla immediately, and just as the hour digit shifted to 9, minutes following suit, she picked up the phone and cleared her throat.
" Hello." There was a moment of silence and then she agreed with an 'ahem', and hung up the black phone, pushing herself off the chair and turning to leave in her cubicle.
On her way to homicide, she encountered Det. Yelina Salas, and she realized she could've easily asked the other Hispanic woman for the help she needed.
However, Adele chose to ignore that little fact as she strode through the labyrinth like hallways of her department as she reached the elevators and rode up one floor, remembering how she actually received a subtle invitation to do just that.
Through her musings, Adele didn't realize she wasn't alone in the elevator anymore until she heard the voice she somehow, guiltily indulged herself in hearing.
" Hey, fancy meeting you here." She turned her head sideways and let out an ironic chuckle.
" We seem to be bumping into each other an awful lot lately." Adele withdrew her hand from her pocket long enough to hide a strand of dark brown hair behind her ear.
John stood a little awkwardly, in the close proximity to the woman he considered incredible, just when the elevator doors closed, and beeped.
" Going down?" He asked, and Adele flashed back to reality, long enough to reply, " Actually, I was coming to see you."
Sevilla took great pleasure in watching the taller detective's eyebrows rise slightly, and even more so the obvious delight that flashed in his ocean eyes.
Taking a quick moment to study him in a trance of surprise mixed in with pleasure, Sevilla heard him only faintly as he spoke, " What about?" He followed it up quickly, not missing a beat on his sarcastic trip,
" I can't imagine I seduced you with a cup of coffee, enough for you to have the desperate urge to see me on the hour, every hour." His derisive remark didn't quite reach Adele, but the last part did.
So Mr. Suave was checking his watch too, knowing it was almost an hour before that they'd encountered at the station.
This gave Sevilla not only confidence in continuing on with her thoughts, but also an added satisfaction that she really wasn't crazy enough to consider something or other was going on here.
She let out a bear chuckle as the moving box came to a halt, and they disembarked from the elevator, he escorted her out to the front door and they walked out into the fresh air of the Thursday Morning.
" So are you going to clue me in on why I was graced with your presence, or are you going to keep in suspense?" He voiced his particular concern making Adele laugh again, though this time she didn't leave him hanging.
Casting a look toward the little walkway from the station leading into Dade Blvd, she turned to him with a gorgeous pristine smile on her face, as an idea entered her head,
" Hey, did you have breakfast this morning?"
John scratched the back of his neck quizzing, probably, silently wondering what her inquiry had to do with anything they were discussing before.
" Ummm no." He answered honestly however and watched the shorter detective's face light up as he did so.
Suddenly in all his life John Hagen actually benefited from telling the truth.
This day was turning out to be good.
" Okay good, I know this little place that had 'the' best pancakes, let's go." Adele motioned him to follow her on foot, and John agreed without mere reluctance, unaware that Adele was thinking the same thing…
Take my hand and if I'm lying to you
I'll always be alone, if I'm lying to you…
Horatio didn't feel like she had invited him in directly, but then again, technically they weren't in the best position right now.
Closing the door behind himself discreetly, he moved through the dark foyer slowly, surprised that the apartment was so shaded, and yet at the same time understanding to the fact that Tim probably wasn't best friends with the sun.
No, that would be Calleigh's job. He glanced around and then entered the kitchen where Megan shoved a coffee cup at him, with mock determination and serious scowling issues.
He wanted to call her on it. He wanted to yell at her. he wanted to ask questions and then suffocate her for the answers, and yet all he did in his sullen glory was say a meek thank you, and accept the coffee, though it seemed like he'd had enough that morning already.
She tended to have this affect on him, Horatio thought so, as he took a sip and positioned himself in the only doorway from the kitchen, the only escape route, this insured him that there would be no more running done on her part.
Megan leaned against the counter undecidedly, analyzing her options with an antagonizing slow pace, as she continued to watch Horatio smugly lean on the doorframe and look at her intensely, the only way he could under the circumstances.
Making her feel about as tall as her three-inch heels.
" So, I assume you didn't come here to tell me 'welcome home' huh?" She swallowed, and then took another sip of coffee to calm her dry throat.
It didn't help.
Instead her insides got hotter and hotter, as Horatio's gaze became more powerful.
" No, but then again I wasn't aware, seeing as though, you didn't have the decency to tell me you were returning." He pointed out evenly, very torturously contained, and like she hadn't expected this.
Megan drained half her coffee and then looked for some sort of trigger to go off, waiting for the earth to pucker up and swallow her wholly, not giving her a moment to consider apologizing, which she was well on the way to.
But no, she must not have to apologize, Megan told herself, there was no reason to, she owed nothing to this man, she kept ties with the people who mattered most to her, and Horatio Caine shouldn't have matter.
Although he did.
" it was supposed to be a surprise." Megan snapped at him, and finally was able to breathe easily at getting her anger out on something, on someone.
However her bliss was short lived, she finally let the monster out, opened a flood gate, released all hell, it would now break loose and bite her in the ass eventually, and Megan knew this very well.
Nonetheless, it didn't stop her from flinching when Horatio raised his voice slightly, " Six months Megan. Six fucking months. I thought you were dead." He exclaimed over dramatically, but Megan wasn't fazed instead his voice motivated her. Motivated her to stand her own ground, and prove to him that what she'd done was justifiable.
But first she'd have to convince herself of that, and there was no time to reconcile with her own personal demons right now, so she used a different tactic.
" You think it's all about you? Don't you? Always, *I* thought this, and *I* thought that, and *I* got rejected, and *my* brother died, a heroic death." Megan spat out, and only regretted it when she saw the instant flash of hurt mar his blue eyes.
However the guilt she felt inside didn't last for long.
" Fuck you Megan, this isn't about Ray, I wasn't the one who ran away the minute shit hit the fan, you know, I never thought Ray died a noble death, but Sean did, and it's a pity you ran away from that."
Horatio was flaring; words were claiming his tongue with such passion he never before could seize, and the one thought that had a permanent place in his heart, was that this woman was who he had to thank for that.
" I didn't run away from anyone." Megan rebuked, but didn't have time to justify herself when Horatio neared her with a growl, " Shut the fuck up Meg." He said in a tone that was nothing like she'd ever heard before.
It was almost *gasp* orgasmic.
His voice alone could drive her to oblivion at times, but with this added sound affect that slightly resembled hunger, Megan felt her limbs quiver, and thus she did as she was told, clenching her jaw and not unwillingly.
" W-Why?" She finally managed to choke out and was rewarded with a sweet chuckle, as he reached out to pull her against him, bravely caressing the skin exposed to him between the slacks and the tight fitting chemise.
Megan's heart hammered away in her chest, losing her grip on the coffee cup stuck between them.
" Because I'm going to kiss you now and you'd better not pull away."
The ceramic hit the floor with a thud, and then scattered into a million resistant pieces, but no one heard the clutter, no one stumbled on the pieces, and no one avoided the watery line of caffeine pooling around the couple.
As soon as his magical lips touched hers Megan didn't care in what mess they were standing, or what they created, just as long as the physical connection didn't end…
See my eyes, they carry your reflection
Watch my lips and hear the words I'm telling you
Give your trust to me and look into my heart
And show me; show me what you're doing…
She hadn't expected him to so casually strode into the room, and encounter her just as nonchalantly, and although it was she that was the intruder in *his* lab, she'd been waiting for him. Subconsciously in the back of her head, she was waiting for him, and now wasn't sure what to do with him, when he'd arrived.
Calleigh needed time; to plan, to strategize, to form the right words into a tight fitting apology that left nothing up to the imagination and at the same time evoked the feelings that she knew they had a tough moment answering to.
She didn't have time.
It was just simply not on her side, and never was; especially not now, when she needed it most, when it was crucial but nooooo, it just wouldn't fucking give up.
Calleigh cursed under her breath as she squeezed a chemical onto a cloth she needed to retest, and when Tim greeted her with a bland hello, she squeezed the tube so hard that more synthetic substance came out than needed and she had had enough.
" Stupid, fucking bitch." Calleigh cursed loudly, attracting the attention of not only the New Yorker currently situated centimeters away from her, but parts of the DNA lab, sharing a wall with this room.
Calleigh twisted the cap on the tube in frustration and whipped around her long blonde hair, torturing it a little more, while voicing her concern,
" Nothing to see here people just me, PMSing, no worries." She said, further embarrassing herself, but the distressed look on her face told the spectators to take her word for it.
A few assorted lab techs turned around, but Speed's attention was fixated on her, and would remain so until she told him what was wrong.
He was just about to ask her, when Calleigh turned around and met him with the saddest look she was able to muster under the circumstances of her being pissed off.
She knew it wasn't the time to play Ice queen bitch, but then again there was never a time for that.
" Cal is everything-…" " Okay? Peachy keen." She flashed him a fake smile and moved to the cabinet, which contained another one of the tubes she'd just contaminated.
Tim followed her with his chocolate gaze and then when she stopped a few inches away from him, he looked down at her. Calleigh reluctantly pried her eyes away from the floor and traveled up the body of the man she spent so many nights with.
Told so many painful secrets to.
Given everything she had to, and now it scared the living shit out of her to be unable to do anything but give it back.
" Are you sure your okay?" Speed knew he was being redundant even a little annoying, since he didn't know the extent of hate she felt for him at this point.
Calleigh was about to nod but then decided that lying wouldn't do her any good anymore, it never did, and it wouldn't now, just like timing wasn't on her side, and never would be.
Everything felt normal in her fucked up life, and today shouldn't' have been any different and yet it was, because she was about to do something she was unsure of, and no one was there to cheer her on, tell her that she was doing the right thing, because as it turned out, no one thought she was doing the right thing.
" No, no I'm not." Calleigh shook her head vicariously, and then turned to rest her palm on the edge of the back lit table.
Tim now suddenly felt much more than concerned for her, as he detected the tiny changes in her behavior, the tint of paleness in her features that hadn't been there before.
Nothing seemed out of order except those subtle changes and if he wasn't so damn perceptive maybe, just maybe he could pretend that everything was all right.
" Do, you want to go somewhere and talk?" Speedle asked helpfully but Calleigh shook her head just as fervently, as before, probably even more so now, as she returned, " No, no, here is okay."
She had to admit she felt safe here, in the trace lab, amongst the equipment she encountered everyday, and loved so dearly, and the people that crowded the halls and other rooms that were familiar to her and kind.
Calleigh wished that her surroundings would take the partial heat of the action she was about to take, but it was painstakingly obvious nothing would ever take this burden away. And she was about to destroy any sort of sensibility from her life.
She sank down in the closest stool, Tim leaned down in front of her, and as difficult as it was, Calleigh managed to mask her teary eyed expression from him just for a little while longer.
" Calleigh, about yesterday, I know you didn't mean it. You know I can explain. You know I'd never hide anything from you." Speed pleaded with her fervently, taking her hands into his, and Calleigh stared at with her blue eyes shimmering, and wide open, unable to form a coherent thought at his candidness.
He'd always been cryptic, and introverted, and even in their relationship, in its better days, she was still the chatter box, and he was the one who kept her grounded, told her when she should shut up.
And now this.
He was going against his very character, and all for what? For her…
Her voice hushed to a whisper, and the tears began their proud path down her already flustered cheeks.
" I don't want to break up Tim." She began, and as in depth as she got, the more the floodgate opened, saltiness marred her features, but to Speed she still looked every bit as beautiful, and Calleigh had to look away, because in his eyes, his love was so evident.
" But I don't know what else to do."
Calleigh knew she was a coward, she couldn't look love in the eye, and couldn't face the pain she was inflicting on the only person that matter, but nonetheless it had to be done.
They couldn't continue going on like this, they may have loved each other, but that didn't necessarily mean they were meant to be together.
Maybe it just wasn't in the stars.
And while Calleigh thought of every possible excuse for her actions Tim couldn't believe what he was hearing, and how precisely true it actually was.
He couldn't fight anymore.
Didn't want to, was more like it.
He was tired.
She was tired.
And maybe on their own they could rehabilitate, and retrieve some strength that they had lost through contact with each other.
" Do we keep fighting Calleigh? You want to give up?" He asked more for assurance that she felt the same way, but it came out wrong and Calleigh wiggled out of his embrace, and slid off the stool.
" I wouldn't give up if there was something to salvage." She hissed and he didn't have the energy to stop her, never did, and never would, " So what are you saying, that our relationship was nothing?"
He didn't care if he came off corny or weak anymore, it was how he felt, and it was about damn time he showed it.
" Please stop Tim, please don't throw accusations around like I'm some…I don't know…some suspect that you're interrogating, I'm your girlfriend for fuck's sake, or at least I used to be." Calleigh quieted down and Tim did as well.
But his eyes didn't stop assaulting her so vindictively, so accurately, as if he were tearing her to shreds.
" Used to be." He smirked, " Story of my life." He murmured without a trace of self pity, just a simple statement that both of them knew was true, and this forced Calleigh to face the fact that she could very well be destroying some one else.
She softened again, and pulled Speed in a hug, wrapping her frail arms around him possessively, allowing both of them to grieve immediately, prior to the initial heartbreak, hoping it would ensue solace.
That never came.
However, each knew there was something different now.
" I never got the chance to say that I got your message." He whispered into her hair, taking in his last allowed breath of her into his nostrils.
Basking in the lamenting feeling that he may not get to do this again.
Calleigh was confused at first but didn't dare break the moment, so perfectly crafted, with such a hideous question, she just allowed herself to indulge in the warmth enveloped around her as Tim held her.
This was her heaven and it hurt to know that she had no other option than to break her self away from it.
They pulled back eventually, both a little teary eyed but not admitting it, no words were exchanged, as Speed mouthed to her good bye and left the lab.
Calleigh couldn't have heard him if he had raised his voice to indoor volume anyway, her heart was beating in her throat, her temples throbbed and her vision blurred, and although she knew this would be for the best, she couldn't shake off the immediately loneliness she felt when he left the room.
However, duty called, Calleigh thought to herself when the ring of her cell phone interrupted the mourning process.
Her vision blurred to the depth of her sunken blue eyes, didn't permit her from seeing the name on the Caller ID, but when she realized it was an instant message, she quickly and discreetly wiped away the access tears, clearing her vision just enough to see on the display,
" I love you too."
So sit on top of the world
And tell me how you're feeling
What you feel…is what I feel for you…
OMG, OMG, OMG, OMG, OMG I never thought I'd type those six letters, and I did it, actually you guys did it for me, without the feedback and reviews, I could never finish this, so I thank each and every one of you for helping me out…