HIDIHO! Yep its me the deranged psychopath! Don't ya all just love me! Well any way normal disclaimer. I don't own any thing, SO DON'T SUE! Besides you'd be lucky to get any thing more then $. 12 off me. Well this story is basic trips into the tortured mind of are beloved acrobat. INJOY!

Trowa POV

"Heero, I'm so tired of having to be strong! I want to be the one to be protected. I'm tired and I don't want to stand on my own any more. And it's begging to hurt. Please protect me, hold me forever and I know I'll be safe." I asked in confession to Heero. I had pulled the prussian eyed boy aside to the balcony of are shared hotel room. This has been eating away at me since are first mission together. I had fallen in love with Heero as I bandaged the suicidal solder after we had fought with a few Oz recruits. At first the feelings had confused me making me edgy and causes of my partner. But when I finely figured out what I was feeling, I'd beg for chances to be with Heero.

"What is it you are trying to ask of me Trowa? I don't understand." Heero asked confused at what I was asking him. I gave a heavy sigh trying to think of a way to explain this better.

"What I'm trying to say is that, I . . . . I love you, and I want nothing more but for you to love me too but if you don't that's ok. As long as we can still be friends." I try this and hope that it won't earn me a built in the head. I can't look at him any more, he's wearing that ice mask of his and it hurts too much to look at him.

"Trowa. . ." He speaks my name in a whisper I look up not knowing if it is just my imagination playing a cruel trick or if he really spoke. I blink when he steps up to me and he wraps an arm around my waist and takes the ether and brings my head down to rest on his shoulder.

"Trowa, I love you to." He whispers it into my ear. His warm breath makes me shiver as it caresses the shell of my ear. Those five simple words make me so happy that I cry. This act is so strange but I don't care. I finely have someone to keep me safe, to bring me out of this cold reality and into a warm heaven. Then a shrill cry shatters my warmth. My dream.

Damn it, another dream. Wait wear am I? Oh yea, the last battle. We destroyed the Gundams. All of them, gone now the war is over. But how did I get here? This is the hotel room that Heero and I shared and across the hall is Duo, Wufei, and Quatres three single bed room. I look over to Heeros bed and find him gone. Only his bag remains.

I hear the doorknob turn and I look over to the door to see Heero stepping in with a covered tray under his arm. I wonder about it but when he turns I stop. I know I look normal, my face not betraying the turmoil in me. I want to tell him of the love I have for him but I would die if he rejected me, rejected my love. I allowed my feelings to show once before and they got me hurt, so I will forever wear my mask. I know that as long as I wear it I'm safe from being hurt. But why then dose it hurt more for me to hide from Heero and not tell him? So I just watch him, his handsome slim, finely chiseled muscled body moves so smoothly as he walks. . . .walks over to ME?!

"Your awake, how do you feel?" he asks. I'm surprised he asks and just doesn't go and sit on his bed to leave me to tend to my self witch is, at this moment, impossible for I can't move my body with out it protesting violently. I want to tell him I feel fine and will continue to feel fine as long as he stays right were he's at by my side but I just stay quiet. That's normal for me so I don't worry. He nods. Seeming to understand that I would not answer him. He uncovers the tray he had brought with him. He had sat it down on the small night stand in-between are two beds. It has two large bowls witch contents smell like delicious beef stew.

I feel my mouth fill with water at the intonating aroma. I'm so hungry and can't remember the last time I had beef stew. I turn my head away, ashamed that I was considering pleading for food that wasn't mine nor had I earned. Besides it's not like I can even feed myself. The mercenaries were right. I'm week, and always will be. Heero, I wonder if he could ever over look that. I drought it. He's so strong why would he want to even come back here with me lying like this, wrapped in bandages and showing so much weakness, I will never know.

"Trowa, face me." Heeros voice is firm and commanding as if he's giving me a order. Out of habit I turn to look at him. There is a large soup spoon at my face, filled with warm beef stew. I swallow hard; my thought is dry and longs for the broth to slid down it and moisten the drying flesh. I fight the sting of tears as I remember being treated like this before; I was just a boy and had stumbled into the mercenary camp, a man offered me a spoon full of food. I had looked at him thankfully and lunched my weekend body towards the spoon in thought of having my belly tended to, only to have the spoon pulled back quickly as he shoved it into his own mouth with a smirk befitting the devil himself. He took pleaser in the hungry, betrayed tears that streamed down my face as I attempted to plead for food only to be tortured more and left to collapse on the ground in starved unconsciousness.; Heero why are you trying to hurt me? Your face it . . . . . . softens, now you pity me!

"Trowa, why are you crying? You should eat." God some one give him an Emmy! And what? I'm crying? Damn I slipped!

"Why should I even try." My voice, thank gods, sounds normal if not dry.

"Because you need your strength to heal." He says it as if it's the most obvious thing in the world!

"I know I do, but I also know that as soon as I go to take your offer you'll just yank the spoon back and eat it your self." Oh GODS! He has enough gall to look hurt! He's really trying to earn that award! But why do I feel like I just stabbed him? Even though you're doing this, even though you're trying to hurt me I love you. That makes it hurt worse.

"Trowa, why do you think I would do that to you?"

"Why not, ethers have. What would make you any different from trying it? This trick has been played on me enough time for me to know better." GODS! Now he looks even more hurt and pity is written allover his face! No more, I don't want to see that look any more so I close my eyes. I hear the spoon hit the glass rim of the bowl and then the bowl being set on the tray. I wait for his wait to leave the bed but it doesn't. His wait shifts and the next thing I know his arms are gently wrapped around me and my head is agents his chest.

"Trowa, I would never be cruel to you intentionally." He whispers it gently into my ear.

"NO MORE! No more, I don't want to be hurt any more! Why are you pretending to even care about me! People have cared about me before and I always got hurt! So just stop, it hurts to much to know that you don't mean it!" I burst. I'm crying still, I don't think I've yet to stop. Gods my wounds hurt, my heart hurts, my head hurts, it all hurts. I expect him to give up and let go but he doesn't. I feel his hands gently rub my back and then he begins to coo in my ear.

"Trowa I'm not going to hurt you, ever. What ethers have done to you was cruel and unjust, I will not do that to you." A long pause passes. Is this another dream, am I still asleep? Then he speaks up again.

"I love you Trowa." He whispers. I freeze, my tears stop, I stop breathing, and shaking. I just hold onto his tank top with all the strength I can get.

"Heero," its my voice but I'm out of it and don't really know what I'm doing.

"Heero, is this a dream? Am I dead?"

"No Trowa, your alive thank the gods I nearly lost you but you're alive."

"Heero, I love you, always have." I confess as I tilt my head up to look at him.

"So have I Trowa." He pauses and reaches over behind me. He brings back the spoon.

"Will you eat now?" he brings the spoon to my lips and I open them slowly still hesitant in fear that it's a lie just to hurt me. But it's not. The spoon slides over my lip and deposits the warm delouses stew. Soon I'm fool and he has polished off his own bowl. He has yet to let go of me. He moves on the bed so his back is agents the head board and I am laying agents him, wrapped in his arms.

"Heero, now that the war is over, what are we to do?" I ask quietly

"I found a nice house out in the country when I went to get the stew. To marrow if you are feeling up to moving I thought we could go look at it, maybe buy it and turn it into a home, are home." This strikes me with a grate amount of surprise as I look up at him. He looks down and has a gentle smile. I try to answer but I can't form the words. He leans down and places a gentle chastise kiss on my lips and I know it's no dream. I'm warm, and I'm safe. Nothing could ever be better then this.