This fic came to be after the second time I received a really funny e-mail called "The Very Secret Diaries of the Fellowship of the Ring" about half a year ago. My friend and I were laughing about said e-mail, and I suddenly said it would be fun to do the same thing to the Weiss boys. We discussed it a long time and we came up with this…
So thanks to Halcyone, who is the said friend up there and contributed some ideas. To Shiiru-sama, my sempai, as usual, who helped me make this, of course, and to Neko-Hope, same reason. Also, to you readers, who are putting up with me…
And of course… To Koyasu Takehito. If it weren't for this insane man, we wouldn't have these lovely boys to play with…
For once, I have a non-yaoi Weiss fic… Or is it? Or is it not? Wahaha… You decide…
Note: Most of this fic is in journal entries, whether in an online journal (actually a ujournal in this case), or on a written one. It starts out with Omi's ujournal then continues into Ken's written diary. It switches to narration only near the end.
Tsukiyono Omi's journal
1:16 am: Mmmm……… Yummy
We just came back from a… job. I know it's strange to be coming back from a … job… this late at night but… never mind that… What matters is…
Oh.. I just don't know how to say it! It's just… You just have to see him! I don't know why I didn't see it myself before…
You don't know who I'm talking about do you?
I… Tsukiyono Omi… am in love with the child prodigy himself.
Oh gods!! He's just so… incredible! His dark brown hair, his midnight eyes, the pale skin… Did I ever mention that he's got hot legs too? I can almost imagine it… If only we were always fighting, I could grab him, throw him on the floor, rip all his clothes off and…
Oh I'm getting carried away. But I can't help it! He's so beautiful and I would just love to have the feel of us together… hot, sweaty… naked…
I shouldn't finish that, but you all know what I mean, right??
I want him…Gods I want him!!
Current Music:Naoe's moans *_*
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8:52 am: KEN-KUN I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!!!
KEN-KUN YOU ABSOLUTE ASSHOLE!! I KNOW IT WAS YOU!! YOU MADE A MISTAKE WHEN YOU SIGNED THAT LAST ENTRY WITH YOUR INITIALS!!
HOW DARE YOU WRITE IN MY JOURNAL!! HOW COULD YOU?!! Oh gods… now everyone thinks I'm in love with… with… with NAOE?!?!
GUYS! Don't believe that entry up there!! I am NOT in love with anyone named Naoe Nagi! I do NOT think he's gorgeous beyond all reason! I do NOT fantasize about him!! I do NOT have wet dreams about him!!
How could you all read that entry so fast?!!? Oh gods! I gotta delete it before anyone else gets to it…
You ALL know it isn't true, right?? You know who I want!! You know who the real star of those dreams are!!
…… Ken-kun… don't you DARE try to find out who if you read this again.
Come to think of it…
HIDAKA KEN!!! IF I EVER CATCH YOU SNOOPING AROUND MY JOURNAL AGAIN I WILL MAKE SURE YOU REGRET IT!! I don't CARE if you're my best friend and I don't CARE how I feel about you, you will PAY!! SO HELP ME YOU WILL PAY!!!
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May 5 - 9:05 am
Hehehehe…. Omi's SOO pissed at me right now… Well, that's probably not a good thing, but I still I wish I had a camera when his face was all puffed up and his cheeks were so red! It was PRICELESS!! Too bad he also looked like he wanted to kill me. I'm in my room and I've locked the door now, just in case he plans to strangle me but still… It's what he gets for leaving his laptop on his journal when he fell asleep last night… And who in their right mind would keep a public online journal anyway??
Heh. I think he's off the warpath now. I should really go apologize while he's still in a better mood.
But still… XD PRICELESS!!
May 5 - 3:45 pm
Maybe I should have thought this out. Omi's stopped talking to me. I tried to apologize the whole day, but he just wouldn't listen to me. Yohji was asking me why the chibi wasn't being very responsive. Of course I didn't tell him. Maybe Omi would have just gotten even madder at me. I hope he's not that mad at me. He's my best friend and all. He does mean a lot to me.
Maybe I did more damage than I thought. I'll have to check again tonight.
May 6 - 1:47 am
Yep, true to my word, I checked Omi's journal again. Don't worry, I just read his last entry and didn't add or change anything. Not a good idea to keep the URL lying around huh? Oh and YES I know what a URL is. I'm not dumb like popular belief states. I even learned how to operate Omi's journal without any help. Geez…
Anyway, checked the journal and I was right. He was totally angry. I feel really bad now. I don't even feel like writing anymore… I'll get back to you when something's up again…
May 8 - 10:20 am
Okay, I know I said I wasn't going to be writing in here for a while, but there's something I just couldn't get off my head. What's up with Yohji? He's been giving me these LOOKS in the flowershop yesterday. Normally, he'd just tease me a bit then leave me alone, but yesterday, he was staring at me more than normal. He even went as far to ignore some of the girls who went into the shop.
Wonder what's wrong with him? Maybe Omi told him about what I did and he's pissed at me too. Yeah, that must be it.
May 8 - 4:24 pm
Okay… now, Aya's hopped into the bandwagon. And this is Aya you're talking about. Is Omi really that lovable? I do one thing to him and suddenly Aya and Yohji are both giving me the stink-eye… If that was the stink eye that they were giving me…
Okay, maybe they have been doing stuff like this all the time, but I just noticed now okay? Now that Omi's so pissed at me. Maybe I should try apologizing again…
May 11 - 8:32 pm
Gotta love Omi… He apologized for blowing up at me the other day. He was really sorry, he said. Also mentioned that he couldn't possibly stay mad at me for very long because we were best friends. Told him it was all right. That I shouldn't have done what I did in the first place. We made up of course, and we ended up watching TV together for the rest of the afternoon.
Thing is, he couldn't stop fidgeting. I had the weirdest feeling he wanted to tell me something. But I don't know what it was. Maybe it had to do with that journal entry he had when I checked on it. It said something about someone he actually is having *cough* dreams about. Maybe he wanted to tell me who it really was, so I'd not do anything like what I did again.
Have to say, I am curious. I hope she's a pretty girl… and smart like Omi too. And I hope she likes him too. He deserves that much.
Oh well… Now that Omi's not mad at me anymore, I suppose Aya and Yohji would stop it with the looks already. Those two were really making me uncomfortable for a while.
~~Ken-kun (in honor of my making up with Omi)
May 12 - 7:32 pm
I broke a pot… Now wasn't that entertaining? No, seriously… What I want to say is that Aya told me to clean it up. So I had to bend over and pick up the pieces.
When I stood up and turned around, Yohji was suddenly whistling. Omi was talking a little too fast to the customer beside him. Aya was just turning away. All seemed uncomfortable with something. Honestly… what was all the fuss? It was just a broken pot…
May 13 - 2:39 am
I know I told myself I wasn't going to check the journal again. But I couldn't help wondering what Omi was so worried about last night… well a couple nights back now. I think it's a good thing I checked, because today's entry said something about him confessing about who he really did love. Wow, Omi in love. I'm almost envious. Not because of that. But… well, it's probably hard to explain.
Anyway, the reason why he was worried was because he was starting to suspect that some other people were after his love too. Ouch.
Ganbatte Omittchi! I hope you win!
~~Ken-kun (in honor of Omi again)
May 15 - 3:42 pm
Umm… I'm a little freaked out now.
And he didn't just smile… he smiled at me.
…………. Who is this man who calls himself Aya and what did he do to our teammate?
May 15 - 9:59 pm
Omi's so cute… Wait… Not like that!
Anyway, was watching soccer when Omi popped into my room. Said that he couldn't sleep. So I told him to stick around. Sure, I was a little curious why he came up one floor to me when he and Yohji stay right next to each other downstairs. Guess he thinks we're really close or something. I don't mind at all. What are friends for?
He snuggled into the bed with me and actually put up with watching my soccer. I thought I felt him cuddle… but I dismissed that. He was fidgety, what else could he do? And it was cold anyway.
May 17 - 4:04 am
I know it's way too early, but we just got back from a mission and I just had to report what happened. I know I don't usually write about the missions, but I just had to put this down.
Schwarz showed up. Funny too, cause it was a minor mission and we hadn't seen them in ages. But that's not what I need to say. You know how it is that I'm usually fighting Berserker, Yohji fights Mastermind, Aya fights Oracle and Omi fights Prodigy (my inspiration for prank two weeks ago).
But for some reason in the middle of the fight, Prodigy turned on me. I slammed straight into the wall and I wasn't able to move for a while. The kid gave me a whole lot of strange looks and I'm not sure if he was concentrating right because I think my shirt lifted a couple of times. I don't think the other guys were concentrating much either… Omi kept missing, Yohji kept tangling up his wire and Aya.. Well I didn't see what was wrong with Aya.. I guess he must have been fine because he attacked Prodigy and made him lose concentration.
My back still hurts from the falling and slamming though… Omi offered to patch it up, but I told him to get some rest. Seemed very eager, but I knew he needed the rest too…
Anyway, the bottom line is, something's up with everyone, and I somehow think it's got something to do with me.
May 20 - 2:49 pm
Yohji's being a lot nicer than usual. Offered to give a me a backrub today... a traditional one... It felt really nice... Though I'm starting to wonder if he really had to rub my butt as much as he did.
…… Okay, that did NOT come out the way I wanted it to…… never mind… Not thinking about that… Yohji was being a nice friend… He was not… trying to molest me…
May 24 - 1:29 am
Was it just me? Or was Oracle giving me the same strange looks that Prodigy was giving me a week ago?
May 24 - 7:10 pm
Aya invited me to practice with him. I decided to take him up on it, why not? I needed a workout and I haven't been able to schedule practices with the kids lately. But when we started sparring, he ended up tackling me more than spar. Was it really an accident that certain parts of him kept brushing against… my certain parts ......
Then again, perhaps he really did trip over the pole on the floor like he said. But wouldn't he be able to avoid that easily? Omi's the clumsy one, definitely not him.
… I was writing groin up there right? o.o
May 30 - 3:01 am
Berserker is acting funnier than usual…
Had another mission the other night.... Was fighting Berserker as usual... He slammed me against the wall, knocking me half-conscious. Was it just me or did I feel his hand sneaking around my pants... *shudder* don't even wanna THINK about THAT!! Good thing Omi saw us and shot at him with a bolt. He didn't get hurt of course, but at least he was distracted enough for me to escape.
I wonder what that look in Omi's eye was...
May 31 - 5:03 pm
*ahem* Yeah.. Today it was really hot.... But I was still very, very surprised when Omi suddenly came into the living room wearing only a pair of tight short shorts.... He explained it was because of the heat, but somehow I don't see how sitting across my lap would drive away the heat... I think he said it was so we could share the electric fan...
Come to think of it... the electric fan was swiveling...
Nah… Omi… he couldn't have been…
May 31 - 5:10 pm
SHIT!! I just remembered!!
Omi's entry after my prank!! When he said he was in love with someone!! That there was someone he wanted, that there was someone starring in his dreams… He didn't want me to find out who it was!! And if I remember right… he said… Shit… shit shit shit…
He said he didn't care if I was his best friend, and he didn't care HOW HE FELT ABOUT ME!!
I'M the star of those dreams… I'M the one he wants… I'M the one he's in love with!!!
June 1 - 12:08 pm
What the HELL is WRONG with everyone?!! Is it just me or is everyone trying to get into my pants?!! Omi practically jumped me this morning!! Aya was putting his hand around my shoulders in the shop!! And I'm PRETTY sure I felt Yohji put his hand on my butt while we were closing up!!
I know Omi wants me now.. But what the HELL is wrong with everyone else?!!
GOD!! Is everyone gay but ME?!!
June 1 - 12:15 pm
He said… He said that he needed to hurry and confess his love already because he found out that there were other people in love with that love…
Other people in love with ME!
That was right after I found all three of them staring at me… While I was bent over…
I'M LIVING IN THE SAME FUCKING BUILDING AS THREE GAY PERVERTS WHO WANT ME!!
June 3 - 2:38 am
My fears are confirmed…
And not only do my own teammates (my OWN TEAMMATES) want me… Schwarz wants me as well…
Mastermind showed me some very … disgusting images… when he caught me off-guard earlier. Some involved me and Omi… some involved me and Yohji… some involved me and Aya… Prodigy.. Oracle… I don't want to THINK about the ones with Berserker… And of course the abundance of ones with me and Mastermind himself.
I'm so screwed…
SHIT BAD CHOICE OF WORDS KEN!!
Let me die before I wake up tomorrow…
June 3 - 8:57 am
Do I dare go down? I'll be sick… I can call in sick…
June 3 - 9:10 am
Damn Omi and his punctuality and his nosiness and his thermometers and his…
I should bring you along just in case…
June 3 - 9:25 am
Okay.. This isn't so bad…
June 3 - 9:27 am
And Yohji brushes his hand across my butt……
June 3 - 10:39 am
Aya touched me… Not just any touch! He touched me…
June 3 - 11:04 am
Yohji was getting too close again… I ran away from him as fast as I could…
June 3 - 11:26 am
I'm staying away from Omi now too!! I hope that really wasn't his crotch on my hand.. I mean my hand on his crotch.. I MEAN HIS HAND ON MY CROTCH…
NO! I'M NOT THINKING OF DOING THAT TO HIM!!
June 3 - 11:30 am
WHY IS EVERYONE TRYING TO TOUCH ME?!?!
I need my soccer ball…
June 3 - 12:45 pm
God… Kill me now… I'm sorry I turned away from you… I'm sorry I became a killer… I never meant to… I swear! Just spare me now…
June 3 - 1:01 pm
You know what? I'm not picky… ANY god listening out there… Please??
June 3 - 1:48 pm
DAMNIT!! Does the CAT want me too?!! It keeps rubbing against my leg like it wants to POSSESS me!! IT DOESN'T HELP ME THAT IT'S MALE TOO!! I try AGAIN and AGAIN to give it back to Momoe-san but it just keeps coming BACK!!
CAN CATS BE GAY TOO?!
DOES EVERY MALE IN THIS BUILDING DESIRE TO GET ME IN BED??!?!
June 3 - 1:50 pm
Must get out… Must escape…
June 3 - 2:02 pm
I can't take this.. Help me.. Anyone..
June 3 - 2:13 pm
Alone… Alone… Omi… bad… gonna try… no! can't… get away… have to…
JunE E ----- 244
ball… pretty ball… ball not mean… ball not bad… ball not gay…
juNe 3 255 pm
Wilson friend right? wilson won't try go after me… Wilson won't try touch me or feel me or seduce me or rape me… Wilson new best friend! Omi was bad… Omi very bad… ken can't trust omI or AYa or Yoohji…
have to hide Wilson so they can't get us so they Can leave us alone… WiLson can help me… right Wilson! you great friend, wIlson…
can't find us!! never find us, wilSSoN! can't do StrAnge things to us! theyfinaLLy leaVe us alone! Even damn gay Cat can't get herE!! We safe here… We safe… We saAfeee…. We straight!! Wee not gay… We not gay at all… We~~`~~---------.
Ken shrieked as the closet door was opened. He clutched his soccer ball protectively, dropping his journal and his pen.
"NOO!! Get away me and Wilson!! Can't take us!! We innocent!!"
Omi's eyes were wide. "K-ken-kun! It's just me! It's Omi!"
"Noo!!" Ken wailed, still hugging the ball. "Don't touch us! Don't come near us!!"
The younger boy gently laid a hand on his shoulder. "Ken-kun… It's okay… It's okay…" he said soothingly.
Ken looked up hopefully, "W-won't try to rape me?"
A sweatdrop appeared on Omi's head. "Y-yes, Ken-kun. I'm not going to… rape you. Come on. I'll bring you to your room. You'll like that right? If I brought you to your room?"
The brunette nodded enthusiastically.
"Good. Now come on, Ken-kun. Take my hand…"
It took a lot of coaxing before Omi was able to get Ken out of the closet. And even then, he wouldn't let go of the soccer ball, claiming that "Wilson needs mee!!" Omi gently led him out into the hall, and up into his apartment. He passed by Yohji on the way up the stairs.
Yohji's eyes widened, "Holy shit!! Ken?!"
Ken only shrank back, clutching his ball again. He whimpered softly.
Omi smiled weakly, "U-um… I-I'm fine, Yohji-kun."
"If you say so…" Yohji said reluctantly.
Omi continued to lead Ken up the stairs. They passed by Aya's room. Violet eyes widened as he noticed Ken.
"Omi?" was his simple query.
"I'm handling it, Aya-kun."
Ken was brought to the adjoining room, and Omi let him lie down on the bed. He ran a hand through Ken's hair soothingly. Ken shrank a little at first, but then mewed helplessly.
Omi chuckled a little, moving away from the bed. He left the room and closed the door. He passed by Aya down the hall, and Yohji by the stairs again. He told them that Ken was all right. He continued down onto the floor of his own apartment.
Omi went to his computer and connected. He loaded his online journal and began typing.
Tsukiyono Omi's journal
3:18 pm: Ken-kun
Current Music:Ken-kun's wails
Um… I think things went out of hand. Ken-kun actually lost it.
I'll have to admit, it was a lot of fun at first. But we might have pushed things a little TOO far… How far is too far you ask? If you consider him hiding in the closet from us, hugging the soccer ball he suddenly started calling 'Wilson' protectively, I guess it wasn't too far after all. (I think he's seen too much of that American movie…)
Anyone noting my sarcasm?
Anyway, I think it was really pushing everything to hard when I even paid Schwarz to join in. Maybe I should have been alarmed when they all seemed to eager to participate.
But still! He shouldn't have been snooping around my private life! What if he found out what I've been keeping from him?! What if he found out a lot of my other secrets?! Not that I have much other than that particular one, but it's still a what if?!
Omi leaned back, and looked up to the ceiling. He bit his tongue a little before moving back and typing a little more.
Oh gods, he's wailing again. This was a bad idea… This was a very bad idea.
There was another loud cry, some unintelligible babble that seemed to have the word 'rape' in it. Omi swallowed dryly before continuing what he was typing.
Maybe it's a bad time to tell Ken-kun I really am in love with him…
weh… It's done. Was meant to be longer… Ran out of ideas… Poor Ken-ken… Review firstname.lastname@example.org