Disclaimer: I don't own Harry, nr any of his many triumphs...er...JKR has those. And Billy Joel? 'The Entertainer', basis of this parody, is all his.

Author Note: A big thank you note to Liz, for giving me the push to get over myself and my damed title line perfectionism and just write the dang thing. This has been itching at the back of my mind for some time, and Harry's OoTP teen angst-fury gives the perfect backdrop for a good rant song about that fickle fiend, fame.

Without further ado...
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Harry J Potter- To the tune of 'The Entertainer'

HARRY:

I am Harry J Potter
And the Dark Lord wants me dead
Another wiz-in-training
With a scar on my forehead
I've been a Hogwarts champion
I may have won before
But I'm sick of fame, they'll forget my name
And I won't be here past my seventh year
If I don't beat Voldemort

I am Harry J Potter
And my chums have lent their hand
Hermi'ne and Ron help me out
And they seem to understand
But still some gawkers watch me
Still they'll watch each move
So I've just gotten by with each passing eye
I'm not a haughty brat like that Malfoy prat
And I've got nothing to prove

I am Harry J Potter
Known all around the world
I'm mad at all injustices
And I've had no luck with girls
I've given socks to house elves
I've rescued Hagrid's beasts
Ah, What good is praise
You know I'd be amazed
If after a catch in a Quidditch match
The press would give me peace

I am Harry J. Potter
Got Mum's eyes and my Dad's hair
I may be your great 'boy who lived'
But I ain't Slytherin's heir
Oh, They say I talk to serpents
And that I won't deny
Freed a Boa too, from the London zoo
Never made an attack on anyone's back
Tell Umbridge I didn't lie

I am Harry J Potter
I come to learn my spells
You've heard my latest story
How I've beaten seven hells
But my early years were hopeless
They were the years on Privet Drive
It was a horrible start, Dursleys have no heart
Was a boy under-the-stairs
Who thought that no one cares
But I'm lucky just to be alive

I am Harry J. Potter
Enigma of my age
I make all kinds of enemies
When I'm on the front page
Ah, you've seen me in The Prophet
When I've managed to escape
But if I talk back, about Sir'us Black
I'll get put with the kids scrubbing cauldron lids
By that git Professor Snape

I am Harry J Potter
And the Dark Lord wants me dead
Another wiz-in-training
With a scar on my forehead
I've been a Hogwarts champion
I may have won before
But I'm sick of fame, they'll forget my name
I won't be here past my seventh year
If I don't beat Voldemort