Disclaimer: Don't own them, I'll put them back where they were. Don't sue Why hello, this story is fine, fine and fine again! Yippy! It's about Clark Kent losing his double bactrian camel, uh oh!

Chapter 1

It was a fine day, sun in the sky, birds in the sky, even airplanes were in the sky today! Which was super. Because if it was cold Clark would have to ultra-super-duper-cajolingly rush back inside and fetch his scarf, although he loved his scarf( made for him by the teapot) very much it would be such an annoying task to fulfill! So off skipped Clark to school. When he arrived Pete leapt over the desk and kissed Clark on both cheeks and knelt down and even kissed Clarks shining black shoes. "hello pet" said Clark in his brand-new northern English accent (which he had adopted from masturbating over Deirdre in Coronation street for a month) and sat down, emptying is make-up onto his desk, with Pete kneeling next to him watching and learning from his super master. "blush, check" muttered Clark to himself as he picked up each piece of equipment "mascara, check, lipstick, check, eye shadow check, double bactrian camel.." Clark paused here and looked in his bag, there was nothing in there "where's my double bactrian camel!!??!" shouted Clark desperately, looking around for some one to say "ha ha! Gotcha Clark! Here it is" but no one did. Pete noticed a horrible glint of fear in Clarks eyes, which he had never seen before, Clark wasn't supposed to be afraid of anything! Not nothing! But he was...and Pete wet himself and belly flopped home shouting "Verbatim! Verbatim! Verbatim-tim!" At that moment Chloe walked in smiling hysterically, which had become permanent since she got over Clark, and said through clenched teeth "Clark, what'sh wrong?" but Clark had already gone..gone into a form of emotion only known as..rage!!! He was smashing up the class room and every one and thing in it, BAM! WAM! SOCK! SHOE!DC NOISES DON'T MAKE SENSE! YES THEY DO! OK THEN!GLAD WE GOT THAT SORTED!SO AM I! OK! And in a second every one was dead and Clark was doing his make up, preparing to search the world. He was just about to go when he remembered he might have to search in the Antarctica, and he would get nippy so he ultra-super-duper-cajolingly rushed back home and got his pretty little pink scarf and set off. He was right, he did have to search in the Antarctica and he was right about it being a bit nippy too, it was a bit nippy. Clark knocked on an Eskimo's door and waited, A little man opened it and told him that he had seen a double bactrian camel, just north of the shire, but he had turned evil! Clark cried, his little Cherokee. all grown up and evil. When he was done crying he skipped to the shire and found his double bactrian camel had grown to the size of a house and was made of iron, huge metal claws swung at random things such as Tree's! farms! Rocks! Banks! Although Clark Kent loved his double bactrian camel, he had to stop him, so with a "raw!" Clark leapt up at the double bactrian camel's face and tore it off, with no face the double bactrian camel was blind and ran around crazily, Clark punched the double bactrian camel in the chest and made a hole, his poor, poor Cherokee fell to the floor screaming his mechanical song and died. Clark sat around for a while doing various things, singing, crying, sleeping, eating est. est. and then went home and made sweet, sweet love to that Lana fellow, Yippy!

By Harry Sinclair, 'a god in the making'.