This is about the sages, cable TV exercise tapes, and non-existent walls. Please read and review. It's random, and will get more random if you review! Read on! ! !

Disclaimer: If I owned Zelda, I'd be creating a new game that doesn't involve saving a princess, not sitting here writing a random fic. And if you owned it, you'd be doing the same, not reviewing. But since you don't. . . please review!

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Darunia: Nothing good's on TV!

Saria: Naw, ya think? Just to let you know THE FREAKISH REALM OF SAGES DOESN'T GET CABLE YOU TWIT!

Darunia: I knew that.

Saria: Sheesh. What would you buncha freaks do without me?

Nabooru: Who are you calling a freak you freak?!

Saria: Who'd ya think, freak?

Nabooru: You wouldn't know, you're just a freak!

Saria: Freak!

Nabooru: Freak!

Saria: Freak!

Nabooru: Freak!

Saria: Twit!

Nabooru: You stink.

Saria: Thank you.

Annoying narrator dude: Suddenly, music begins to play!

Music: Ready? Here we go now! Jump, right, left. Forward! Doin' great girls!

Impa: Ruto, turn off the freakish exercise tapes!

Ruto: But Link is coming soon if he ever beats the Water Temple. He's been in there for eight whole months already! I have to look beautiful if my fiancée is coming to see me!!!

Saria: Whoa, wait a second. Did you say YOUR fiancée?! Girlfriend, I have known him for his entire life, and you say he's YOUR man?! Get a @#$% life already.

Ruto: He vowed his eternal love to me when we were but children. At least I'm somewhat developed. You're still a kid.

Saria: Excuse me, but did you just call me a child?! Let me have you know, I'm a Kokiri! The most intelligent and proud race of Hyrule?!

Ruto: Asif. The last time I checked you people were still living in little wood cottages and running around pointlessly like morons!

Saria: Naked fish!

Ruto: Air breather!

Saria: Water sucker!

Everyone: O o o o o o. . .

Nabooru: *pops up* How come they can think of good insults?!

Raru: *throws rock at Nabooru*

Nabooru: O w w w w w w! ! !

Raru: *begins to bang head on wall*

Saria: We have walls?

Raru: *falls into abyss*

Saria: That gets rid of one of our problems.

Nabooru: Raru go bye-bye.

Darunia: Let's PARTY! ! !

Raru: *magically reappears*

All: @#$% it.

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Well, that's the end of this entirely random chapter. If you guys review, they'll get longer! If you review, you get to be in the story. All you have to tell me is:

*Who you want annoy the living daylights out of

*How

Get it? Got it? Good. Oh yeah, this is for Sanari! Randomness will one day rule! =)