Before I begin, a special shout out to those who got the reference from my last chapter as promised.

JuanG, juanvilumbrales, JackOhLantern, kid-kaos295, CosmicWlf97, Ultimate-Zelda-fan, lucifertrust, The Lord of Fereldon, jadeangel099, SixStringBass, themattman4000, BusGrunts, KuramaAxD, Hauck Killer , Tyleri94 , deathblade0987

IMPORTANT NOTE: I have added certain to this chapter. I realized that some of the stuff that was supposed to be there never appeared when I uploaded it. However, as you all know, Fanfiction was acting up these last few days, and of course on the day I finally updated, too. It appears things are fine now so people should be able to see it now.

Also, please note that some characters that haven't appeared yet but were mentioned in podcast or videos by the series creator of Hazbin and Helluva Boss have been a bit modified. Reason why is because some were mentioned or made 4 years ago and little mention on them have been made since except that they may or may not make an appearance or role down the line. What those roles are unknown, some have had cameos, or their old designs made cameos, and nothing more may or may not occur. Either way, I am taking certain liberties to fit my story as right now they are card blanche.

Chapter 5: Unprofessional Professionals, and Professional Unprofessionals

(148 Days until Extermination Day)

Naruto woke to find Ana sleeping comfortably on his chest, her breasts were enticingly pressed against his body, his morning wood curving on her pert little ass. She was practically hotdogging it.

Exactly how it began he couldn't recall. Not that he was complaining. Naruto had since learned to roll with it. Learning how to deal with Hell's energy, however, was a lot like him learning Sage Mode: difficult and slow. Perhaps even more so given the energy of his dimension and this one, Hell's energy to be exact, was very foreign to him. Oh, he was much better than before, but there were still moments that it left him more than antsy, and lustful.

And this was the Pride Ring. Naruto could only imagine how bad it would be for him if he went to the Lust Ring, not that he had any need to go there. He didn't know if each of the Seven Rings of Hell had their own unique energy and would affect him differently or if they were all the same but apparently, visitors to the Lust Ring left many more than wanting according to Charlie.

He didn't know if it was due to energy given off by the Ring itself, or if it was due to the fact that most of the Lust Ring's inhabitants were demons that were affiliated with sex, lust, and desire and the spells and magic abilities they used. Or both.

From her body language and guilty look the blond didn't need to have Shikamaru's brains to deduce that the Princess of Hell was speaking from experience. Naruto didn't pry; Angel did that for him. Vaggie had the latter cut off from the bar for a week as punishment.

It hadn't been a pretty sight. But then, withdrawal never was.

"Mmmmhmmmm," Naruto's musings were interrupted by Ana's moan as she finally awoke, "Morning."

"Morni-Oh, God!" Naruto groaned as Ana pushed herself off his chest, only to sheath him inside her as she tried backing up off of him.

"Mmm..." Ana moaned and bit her bottom lip as she felt her lover reach places that made her spine tingle, "Sorry."

"No, you're not," Naruto called her out; Ana looked anything but sorry.

"Guilty," the young-looking woman rolled her hips and moaned even more as Naruto stretched her insides further and hit spots no one had ever reached as well as he did. Naruto retaliated by grabbing her breasts and tweaking her dark brown nipples. It only served to tighten the female sinner around the blond.

Bang!

Bang!

Bang!

"Oi! Soldier! Get your arse up!" Naruto's partner in crime Karlach called from the other side of the door, "We've got work."

Fuck!

"Maybe if -ah!- we're real quiet she'll think we're gone and go away," Ana whispered.

Naruto tried to comply, however, trying to keep quiet was difficult when his partner was twerking her ass on and off him! And the twinkle of mischief in her eye told him it was being done purposely.

Damn saucy little Latina!

"Tell Ana to get her cute butt off your dick, too! Her mum wants to see her."

Double fuck!

"Dios, maldita sea! Fun's over," Ana stopped her movements; she could get away with many things with her mother but tardiness wasn't one of them. Carmilla Carmine greatly disliked tardiness. Her lover, however, wasn't having it though.

"The Hell it is!" Naruto knew from past experience that blue balls sucked! Damn interrupting kids! Ana started this, she could very well take responsibility for it.

"Eep!" Ana's arms and legs wrapped tightly around Naruto as he rose and slammed himself so deeply into her that it had Ana seeing stars. Not that she was complaining.

The dusky daughter of Carmilla had nothing against the Princess of Hell, but the eldest daughter of the weapons-dealing overlord had no desire to enter Paradise when she was experiencing such bliss. Case and point when she was forced to bite in the nape of Naruto's neck once he grabbed her ass and made himself completely comfortable inside her.

If this wasn't Paradise she didn't know what was.

"Oi! You two know I can hear everything!"

"Give us ten minutes to shower and we'll be right out," Naruto bit back a groan as the minx in his arms tightened around him with her delicious insides. Hey, he might have gotten better at controlling his urges without Kurama but sex with someone he cared for was still sex. And Ana was someone he had come to care for over the last few weeks.

"You've got five!"

"Fifteen!" Naruto hissed as Ana tightened ever further.

"That's not how that works!"

"Oh, Dios!" Ana moaned as she felt her lover twitch inside her and hit a very pleasant spot.

"...I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that. Fine! Ten minutes! But one minute more and I'm coming and-"

"Told you I'd get you to join us, Karlach!" Ana called out before she slammed her ass to meet Naruto's thrust.

"Just get your asses moving!"

"What do you think we're doing?" both sinners simultaneously shouted as they continued their perverse act.

"...Okay, my bad for walking into that one. Nine minutes!"

Both Naruto and Ana chuckled; they could feel Karlach's heat from this side of the door. And not just because of the infernal engine inside her chest.

"Quickie?" it wasn't what she wanted but she'd take what she could get. And she could take a lot thanks to her flexibility

Thank you ballet!

"Quickie," Ana's tongue entered Naruto's mouth as he entered the bathroom and then the shower as they resumed their fun.

For Karlach's sake, Naruto put up soundproofing seals before Ana's back met the wall of the shower as her four limbs clung to him like an anaconda, and her tight vice gripped him like a crab would a finger.

"Rough or tender?"

"Fuck me hard!"

"One order of rough coming up," Naruto's hips became a blur as Ana held on for dear life.

Nothing like starting your day by getting clean and dirty.

"You're late," Carmilla frowned lightly. It was only by a few minutes but late was still late.

"Sorry," both Naruto and Ana bowed their heads.

"No, you're not," Karlach parroted Naruto's earlier statement with a laugh.

"If your union with my daughter ends up with this becoming a habit-"

"You honestly think you can stop me?" Naruto wouldn't make it a habit but he also had to remind Carmilla that despite working for her, he could easily hand the overlord her ass on a platter if he so wished.

Carmilla narrowed her eyes. Ana had been in relationships with way worse, and Naruto honestly had the overlord's stamp of approval given he was easily the best boyfriend - and Ana had dated both men and women - she had. But Carmilla was still her mother.

"Don't do it again."

Naruto rolled his eyes. The woman before him was prideful. Gutsy, but prideful. But the blond sinner wasn't the least bit intimidated.

"Yes, mamá," her daughter was another matter. And for Ana's sake, he'd make certain they minimized undue tardiness.

"So, uh, what's this new job you've got for us?" Karlach diverted the conversation back on course.

"It's different from the usual tasks I've had you and your partner perform. This is more of a retrieval mission."

"Someone taken?" Naruto couldn't recall the last time he had done one of those, "Or something?"

"Something, yes. You recall the day we met?"

"Hard not to. It was the day I saved your butts."

Carmilla didn't so much as twitch at the comment, "Quite. On that day, my daughters and I were investigating rumours that someone, or in this case, multiple someones, was skimming off the top and reminders needed to be made. Well, thanks to you and Karlach, I've uncovered more traitors. Nothing serious in the beginning. It was just money I easily recovered, or I found ways to be re-compensated."

"Poor fuckers," Karlach laughed but stopped. Carmilla would have normally smiled but wasn't in this situation. Karlach immediately knew something was wrong. Something bad, "That bad?"

"Very. In the beginning, it wasn't bad. The money that's gone missing isn't the worst thing they have done, unfortunately. One of them was stupid enough to sell one of my Blessing-Tipped Rifles," Carmilla's daughters along with Karlach were rendered speechless by the overlord's statement, and more than a bit worried.

"Please tell me you're pulling my leg," Karlach prayed this was a joke.

"As much as I would like to inform you otherwise, no, I am not pulling your leg," Carmilla wouldn't joke about something like this.

"Satan fucking damn it!" Karlach cursed while Ana and Blanca cursed in Spanish.

"I'm guessing this thing's not your normal everyday weapon," Naruto chimed in, "How bad is it?"

"Incredibly bad. Angelic weapons for the most part are rare but not unheard of being owned, though it's usually overlords who have 'em. You're already aware they can be used to permanently off sinners and demon royalty, but demons on the higher end of the hierarchy such as the Ars Goetia, the Seven Sins, and The Royal Family, even with an angelic weapon used against them, they're a cut above and much more tolerant, though they aren't wholly immune to the effects of angelic steel."

"This gun's a cut above ordinary angelic weapons then?" Naruto hoped he was wrong but knew he wasn't.

"Above and incredibly expensive. These weapons are very limited and very powerful and it took me ages of trial and error to figure out how to make them, and making them and their ammunition isn't easy, they require rare materials beyond that of angelic steel. Because of how dangerous they are, I don't sell them to just anyone either. Ars Goetia, Sins, and the Royal Family are very tolerant to angelic weapons and divine spells. The more powerful have developed ways to make themselves even more tolerant with few ways to overcome this protection. From what I've discovered, whoever acquired these tools did their homework."

"Tools? I thought it was just the gun?"

"If only. A blessed rope and a knife were also taken. Less dangerous but still enough to immobilize and weaken a Goetia to the point of helplessness," Carmilla was less than pleased.

"Yer not saying someone's going after a Goetia, are you?" Karlach looked bewildered.

"What's got you thinking it's one of them?" Naruto asked.

"Easy, soldier. Going after a Goetia is suicide and just plain stupid. They're powerful demons. But going after anyone above them in rank or simply fucking with them is beyond suicide and a fate worse than death by comparison" Karlach elaborated.

"Under normal circumstances, yes, it would be," Carmilla agreed with Karlach's assessment, "An attack on any member of the Ars Goetia isn't to be done lightly, especially the royal line of Paimon, King of the Ars Goetia," whom himself was a direct descent of the Sin of Lust, Asmodeus.

But there were exceptions.

"Based on my ... findings," Karlach shivered a bit from her employer's cold but satisfied look; Naruto, used to such things when dealing with Konoha's T&I Division, didn't even blink. Regardless, the two could only imagine what the poor unfortunate soul went through, "Karlach is correct, an Ars Goetia is the most likely target. More specifically, the unfortunate target is very likely to be Prince Stolas himself."

"Prince Stolas? Well, that makes sense," Ana simply said.

"I'm guessing he's not well-liked?" Naruto, unfamiliar with Ars Goetia, guessed. Oh, he knew they ranked third - fourth if one wanted to be picky - in terms of the hierarchy in Hell but that was it.

"Actually, Prince Stolas is very well-liked, and he's a son of King Paimon, the current leader of the Ars Goetia. But Paimon has numerous children and cares little really if one or two die unless it's at the hands of those his family deems as lesser," Blanca explained.

Great. Naruto was dealing with those kinds of individuals: ones where killing another who was your equal or lesser was seen as okay, but being killed by someone who wasn't your equal was a different matter.

"Okay, lots of brothers and sisters aside, what did this guy do to be a target if people like him?"

"He fucked an imp," Karlach answered with a snark.

"...That's it?" that was a dumb reason to be targeted.

"Doing something like that in secret is one thing, though still looked down on by those stick up their arses nobility, soldier. Not keepin' it a secret and humiliating yer wife in front of the other Goetia for all to see? Big fucking no, and that's putting it lightly," Karlach didn't know all the details but she heard the story many times to know enough.

"Damn. I feel bad for his wife," no one should be humiliated like that.

"Don't be. His wife's a bitch among bitches, apparently," Ana added what she knew, "Prince Stolas' wife had a Not Yet Divorced Party and bad-mouthed him throughout the whole thing. Their marriage isn't what you would call healthy."

"Ah," Naruto didn't feel as bad anymore, "Wait, how do you know all…It was publicized, wasn't it?"

The dirty laundry of nobles, based on his time as Hokage, wasn't something that was generally known to the public unless it somehow came out through certain means, or if that dirty laundry was aired out for all to see.

"Pretty much all of Pride knows it. Most outside the Goetia don't care - some of the blue blood don't care either - but since it made the news it only served to anger his wife even further. The nobility of Hell are kind to one another one second but will then stab their fellow blue bloods in the back the next if it means improving their standing. Blanca, you have the clip, right?" Carmilla asked her daughter.

"Just a sec...here it is," Blanca showed Naruto the clip on her phone.

"WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT, STOLAS?!" demanded an angry white avian demon covered in destroyed pastry.

"That! Was the sound...OF A FUCKING DIVORCE! HehahahaHAHAHAHAHA!" cackled a very tall dark gray owl-like demon with four red eyes.

"YOU GODDAMN MOTHER FUCKING DISGRACE OF A-"

"And that's where it cuts off. The original clip shows it being covered in frost before the screen shattered," Blanca informed her sister's lover.

"Ever since that incident many among the Goetia feel Prince Stolas to be a disgrace of their blood and should be done away with. A task easier said that done, really since Prince Stolas is a powerful demon and still has friends among the nobility. The other problem is him being a son of their king as despite Paimon's lack of care for his children, Paimon's wrath and power has been said to be comparable to one of the Sins. Any potential action was more talk behind closed doors than anything."

"Not anymore from the looks of it. Any word on who would want him gone? Other than his wife, I mean," Naruto had learned that while Karlach might not be the smartest of individuals and preferred to settle things with her fists but she wasn't lacking in common sense.

"His wife's brother, perhaps? Though from what I've heard from Zestial, Andrealphus is much more cunning and less reckless than his hot-heated sister. Some other members of the Ars Goetia who sympathize with his wife, perhaps? Who knows. But I couldn't care if he dies or not. What I do care about is the backlash this may cause if my rifle ends up as the murder weapon."

Naruto frowned as he quickly put things together. While some of the nobles might not care so much about Stolas dying, the fact that a weapon was made that was capable of killing one of them was. Uncovering who the killer was would be important, just as learning and punishing the one who fabricated the weapon that ended his life, too. Unless it was used by another Goetia, of course.

Even if Carmilla never pulled the trigger, the fact she made such a weapon that resulted in a noble's death, especially a weapon made by those they deemed their lesser, was a matter of archaic pride and pure pettiness. To Ars Goetia, it would be about sending a message than any true sense of loyalty.

"Got any leads?"

"Regrettably, none. Hell has numerous hitmen and assassins both known and unknown. They could be anyone. But, if I were to guess when and where it would be the Harvest Moon Festival that will take place in one week's time."

"One week's time? Isn't Spring Break about to start?" Ana asked as that didn't make sense.

"On Earth, yes, but the Harvest Moon Festival in the Wrath Ring takes place much sooner than on Earth," Carmilla informed her eldest.

"Shit," Karlach cursed.

"What's wrong?"

"Well, for one we're short on time. Second, I know a bit about the Harvest Moon Festival. Prince Stolas goes to the Wrath Ring every year due to his obligations in Hell," Karlach explained, "Biggest problem is since you're all sinners, I'm the only one-"

"I can access the other Rings," Naruto interrupted.

...

...

...

"Pardon?" Karlach believed she heard wrong.

"Debo haber escuchado mal...Repitelo?" Carmila finally spoke.

"Translation?"

"She asked if you could repeat what you just said," Blanca translated.

"I can access the other Rings?"

"How?"

"I'm awesome," Naruto boasted, and got deadpanned looks from everyone, even Ana, "I mean, sure it took some time-"

"You can access the other Rings and you never told me!?" Ana accused.

"We were busy having sex so it never came up."

"That's...Okay, good point. But after this, you are taking me to another-"

"No, he isn't," Carmella interjected, and looked her eldest straight in the eye, "I don't care how you accomplished this but you are not taking my daughter to any other Ring. We have enough enemies in the Pride Ring. What do you think will happen if others learn of her being capable of moving back and forth between them when it should be possible? No! I forbid it!"

"But mom-"

"This isn't up for debate, Ana. So drop it," Carmilla ordered her daughter.

"Ana, your mom's right. You already have a target on you for being Carmilla's daughter. If anyone learns of this, you'll have an even bigger target on that pretty ass of yours."

"Oh, Dios," Blanca palmed her face.

"Not if I can disguise myself. Not if people knew it was you protecting me-"

"Which would undo everything I am trying to accomplish," Carmilla cut off her dark skinned daughter, "and even then you would still be in harm's way. Having agents of mine who are hellborn going to another Ring is one thing, but a sinner all of a sudden being capable of traversing the other Rings? No, I won't risk you."

"Not like it's any more dangerous now given Heaven's plan to go after all demons and not just those in Pride with their new schedule," Ana groused, not liking this one bit, "Besides, even if something does happen to me, I'm a sinner, remember? I'll just put myself back together."

"We don't know if that will apply with you being in one of the other Rings, Ana. No! My word is final. You and your sister are staying here. End of discussion," Carmilla said with a note of finality.

"But-"

"I said end of discussion!" Carmilla stared down at her daughter, who stared right back before she stormed out in a huff.

The joys of parenthood.

Naruto wanted to say something but experience had told him never to undermine the authority of a parent towards their child. Sure, Ana was well over a century old and a grown adult, but Naruto didn't want to sour his relationship with Carmilla by not adhering to her wishes.

Even if he didn't wholeheartedly agree with them.

"Apologies. I should not have lost my composure like that. It was unbecoming of me," Carmilla apologized to him and Karlach.

"Eeh. No skin off my nose," Karlach shrugged.

"I might not agree, but it's not my place to interfere. And having been a parent myself, I've been there," even after his kids had become adults, and grandparents, Naruto and Hinata still had a tenancy, like all parents, of treating their offspring as though they were still young and helpless children.

"That girl...Hah, she takes after me in my younger days...too much, really," Carmilla sighed. And given some of the exploits she had done in her youth, Carmilla very much knew the consequences that could come of it, "But back to the matter at hand, you are to find a way to protect Prince Stolas without arousing suspicion."

"Ha! Easier said than done. Ars Goetia come to us if they think we're worthy of their attention, not the other way 'round," Karlach laughed. Sure, an overlord with enough souls to their name could rival an Ars Goetia but even then most of them would still have a natural advantage and even then they'd still be haughty. Most Goetia would hold a sinner's existence against them.

"Quite true. Which is why you'll be associating yourself with those the prince has a ... close and professional relationship with."

"Close and professional?"

"It would appear the imp Prince Stolas ruined his marriage with runs a... business if we can call it that, whose services he has engaged more than once. And, as luck would have it, they are hiring."

"Business? What kind of business?"

"They call themselves I.M.P. Your duties protecting my daughters will be on hold for the time being should they employ you."

"Oh, boy. Ana's not gonna like this. Tough break, soldier," Karlach commented with a laugh.

"You kidding? Sex with Ana is better when she's riled up," Naruto grinned and ignored the looks from two of the three women.

"Gross," Blanca gagged at the mental image.

"Dismissed," Carmilla didn't want to hear any more details.

Carmilla already knew too much after accidentally walking in on them.

(Meanwhile in Heaven)

"This is soooooo boring!"

"Too fucking bad! Keep working!"

"I hate you!"

"Don't care!"

Sera could only sigh as she and Emily listened as the two archangels exchanged less-than-pleasant banter with one another on the floor above them. It was no secret that the sisters, despite their love for one another, were at each other's throats. One would think that after a month since Michelle's return, they'd have stopped this stupid quarrel.

"I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!"

"NO ESCAPING!"

"YOU'RE THE WORSE COCKBLOCK EVER!"

"FOR THE LOVE OF DAD, SHUT UP ABOUT THAT!"

"KISS MY PERFECTLY TONED ASS!"

Nope! They were still going strong.

"Should we get involved?" Emily, bless her pure heart, asked her senior seraphim.

Sera couldn't stop the unrefined snort that escaped from her, "The Morningstar has a better chance of being let back into Heaven than me getting involved."

"But-"

"Trust me, Emily. You do not want to get involved," Sera's tone, Emily noted, held a slight quiver.

While it happened many millennia ago, back when Sera had been young and idealistic like Emily, the older seraphim still remembered as though it were yesterday the last, and only, time she made the mistake of getting involved in a dispute that involved the two archangel siblings. It was a mistake she vowed to never repeat.

Ever.

Despite being in Heaven, she still had the odd nightmare of the incident. Usually when Adam's exploits caused her headaches and stressed her out. For despite Adam's claims of Heaven being paradise and never having any bad days, it was quite untrue. As Heaven's Favorite, many had to clean up the First Man's messes. Messes he was either ignorant of or just didn't care. Likely both.

In the nearly 10,000 years Adam had been in Heaven, the number of bad days he had compared to everyone else could be counted on one hand. That is until a month ago when the Angelslayer appeared and messed up Extermination Day, forcing Adam to come up with a solution on how to deal with the exceptionally powerful and unique demon and Hell's overpopulation problem. The First Man had been stressed out on how to come up with a solution, and the leviathans were not being cooperative.

It was highly unbecoming of her, but Sera drew some measure of satisfaction in seeing her subordinate struggle and become stressed at his lack of progress. As she heard many say, Karma was a bitch. And Sera was loving it! She didn't believe she was even thinking it, but she was glad for the Angelslayer's unexpected appearance, even

Despite that, Adam's lack of progress with the leviathans was still worrying. Little progress had been made and Hell's overpopulation remained a problem.

"My sisters still driving you up the wall?" a voice laughed.

"Oh, Lord, give me strength," Sera prayed.

"Lord Gabriel," Emilly bowed to the much brown/dirty-blond-haired and shorter but much more powerful angelic being.

Gabriel was slightly taller than his older brother Lucifer by barely half an inch if one were kind, though unlike Lucifer, Gabriel didn't care much about his height as it made him stand out less and made pulling pranks easier.

"What did I say about you calling me that, Em? Call me Gabriel, or Gab. Hate the formal shit," Gabriel, the youngest of God's children and the youngest of the archangels, as well as the most elusive of them all, and Heaven's resident prankster told the younger seraphim.

"Okay!" Emilly chirped.

"Good. Don't make me prank yer ass."

"Lord Ga-"

"Whipped cream, molasses, syrup-"

"Please stop, Lo-Gabriel," Sera was flushed with embarrassment as she recalled the last time she had fallen for one of his pranks. That had been embarrassing for all concerned, mostly Sera.

"What are you talking about?"

"We'll tell when you're older, cutie," Gab ruffled Emilly's hair.

"Older? I'm almost two centuries old!"

"Where am I losing you on this? Anyway, kiddo, I need to talk about something important with Sera so if you could skedaddle that'd be great. Go sing or dance or something," Emily pouted cutely at her child-like treatment but did as she was asked. Once they were alone, Gabriel looked at the older seraphim.

"So...how's everything going?" Gabriel asked cheekily but Sera was interrupted by a loud rumbling from above followed by the sound of wall and glass breaking.

"FREEDOM!" Sera and Gabriel looked out the window to see a golden streak racing away from the building.

It was soon followed by another golden streak, "GET BACK HERE!"

"SCREW YOU, TOY-BLOWER!"

"DEMON FUCKER!"

Thud!

"...Wanna get a drink?" Gabriel decided to be sympathetic, and because he wanted that image out of his head.

"It's not even 10 AM, Lord Gabriel," Sera said, her head still on her desk.

Gabriel let that one slide, "Not in France."

"I'll get my purse," Sera could do with a break from everything she had to endure these last few weeks.

Sera wasn't normally one to question the Lord's wisdom, but why he deemed her the best to deal with them she couldn't understand. From dealing with the bickering archangel siblings to the issues and lack of progress with Adam, as well as Adam being, well, Adam, she more than deserved a bit of respite.

Elsewhere, said First Man was entering a dark and quite frankly, scary as fuck castle that looked like it belonged in a horror movie. Beside him, Lute looked calm and composed, but she was anything but. This was the Red Castle, also known as the House of War, the second strongest Horseman and one of the few who could beat Archangel Michelle.

"Fu-fu-fuck, would it kill her to tu-tu-turn on the heat?" Adam shivered at the cold temperatures. Lute agreed. Her nipples were hard enough to cut a diamond.

"Uh, hello? We're here!" Adam heard his voice echo, it only served to fuel the sense of dread. He was lucky that he was even getting this meeting.

"Hehehehehehe!" was his reply.

"...Lutey, if we live through this, there's no fucking way I'm taking your advice any time soon," that laugh nearly scared the piss out of him.

"Noted sir," Lute tried to sound brave but her response was more of a squeak.

"Fresh meat!" someone behind them declared.

"AAAAAAHHHHHHH!" okay, the piss was out of him now.

"Hehehehehehehe!"

"H-h-h-hiya," there were few things that scared Adam. First and foremost was God when he had been pissed after eating one of his apples. Adam hadn't eaten apples since. Second was Michelle when in a bad mood and the hellish training she put him through. Third was the Angelslayer, not that he would admit it out loud when he gave his speech at the embassy.

War's unhinged behaviour was now the fourth.

"La-lady War," Lutey bowed fearfully, the pale-skinned and red-wearing woman before her was amongst the most powerful beings in existence, and one of the few beings Lutey, a normally fearless angel, was afraid of, "We thank you-

"I itch to peel you, to split your skin, to see your skull shine in the light, little angels. Luckily for you, I've harvested a whole family of living flesh. They will sate my blade's thirst...for the moment. But tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, my blades will thirst again, again, again, and again!" was her mad cackle.

If Adam had a mother, he'd be running into her fucking womb right now.

"Now then...tell me why should I let you leave here alive?" she grinned, licking her bloody knife as she looked at them like a predator would prey, "It's been quite some time since I've feasted on angel blood."

"Y-y-yeah, so...Oh, fuck, me," Adam stumbled.

"Sir, focus," Lute pleaded with her superior; she didn't fancy dying today.

"Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock," War's smile and the wave of her bloody blade didn't help Adam.

Adam gulped as he tried to compose himself but made a resolute declaration: he really had no intention of taking Lute's advice any time soon if they lived through this.

"Times up!" War pounced on them with a mad cackle escaping her lips.

"Eeeekkk!"

Imp City had seen better days. Naruto learned that it was easily the poorest city in the Pride Ring. Blood was on the streets, buildings looked condemned or damn near it, while others were in good need of repair. Homeless people were spotted at almost every corner, graffiti were pretty much used as landmarks, and the poorly written billboards didn't leave much to the imagination. To be honest, this was actually how Naruto envisioned Hell. Not by much though.

"So...these guys go topside and kill people?" Naruto, disguised in his alternate female persona, asked Karlach after reading the information gathered on I.M.P. Having no experience driving, not that there was ever a need back in his world, Naruto left the driving to Karlach.

"That's the gist of it. Heard they had a jingle and commercial too. Never saw it myself but from what I know it didn't last very long," who the Hell put a jingle on a station virtually no one watched and for three hours straight?

"Gotta admit, I'm torn," sure, Naruto had gone on assassination missions before becoming Hokage but the the services I.M.P. didn't leave a good taste in his mouth. Sure, some might deserve it, but not everything was black and white. But given they were in Hell, Naruto surmised they didn't give a shit either. Money was money. People had to make a living somehow.

"Don't like it either but it's our best lead. Like I said, the Ars Goetia come to you and not the other way 'round. Stuck up pricks," Karlach muttered.

"Bad experience?"

"Let's just say I've broken a few beaks and wings," the red-skinned woman grinned. Given Karlach was an eager and willing participant of bar brawls Naruto could definitely see it.

"Bad blood. Got it."

"Here we are!"

"Whoa!" Naruto exclaimed and held on for dear life as Karlach unexpectedly turned into a parking lot.

Screech!

"My bad!" Karlach laughed.

Naruto instantly disliked Karlach's driving and driving in general after today. He'd stick to good old-fashioned rooftops and running faster than the wind.

"Parking's for fucking tenants!" came a demon from a nearby intercom, "Get the Hell off my property!"

"We're here on fucking business from Carmilla Carmine," Karlach said into the intercom, "Know where we can-"

Boom!

Both Naruto and Karlach watched as a parked vehicle was suddenly destroyed and a space suddenly became available.

"Please enjoy your visit."

"Well, that's boring. I was hoping to smash something," Karlach whined like a child.

"Maybe later," Naruto reassured her.

Once parked, the two entered the building and proceeded to make their way up to the floor where they spotted the office of I.M.P.

"Hold up, soldier," Naruto looked back at the woman and saw her staring at the office opposite to them, "You go on ahead. I've some catching up to do."

"Do I need to call a cleaning crew?"

"Haha. Nothing like that. Just an old friend. I'll catch up in a sec," Karlach told her partner before opening the door, "Wat up, bitch!"

"Karlach!" a voice squealed.

Phew! Naruto was glad a fixer wasn't required and entered I.M.P.'s office, bending down to make it through the doorway, only to see an empty room when he righted himself. Based look of things the room appeared to have had been damaged more than once and in different ways.

"Hello?" Naruto called out to no response, "Anyone here?"

Again, no response.

Walking around the room, Naruto spotted a door with a crudely scribbled note that indicated a meeting was in progress,

"You three have been screwing around on Earth this whole fucking time… WITHOUT HUMAN DISGUISES?!" a voice exclaimed from behind the door.

…Naruto was starting to wonder if this was a good idea. Sure, he knew some demons went to Earth due to work but any demon that didn't use a disguise was pretty much asking for trouble from both Heaven and the Earthly authorities.

Or just plain stupid.

"There's gotta be a better way," Naruto knew amount shit missions to know this one might end up being a doozy.

"All right, good meeting people. Moxxie come with…did we bring another human into Hell again?" asked a rather large imp coming out of the conference room.

"Not a human," Naruto was intrigued by the latter comment though. He was fairly certain Death said non-deceased humans would go crazy or die the moment they were brought to Hell.

"Oh, thank Satan. Who the fuck are you and what do you want then?" the imp demanded.

"Good job. That'll get us some work," said a female hellhound in goth clothing.

"Shut the fuck up, Moxxie!"

"I didn't say anything! That was Loona!" said a smaller, white-haired imp.

"Are you accusing my precious wittle Loona?!"

"Calm down, Blitzø. Wot's got your panties inna bundle?" asked a heavily accented imp woman.

"Well, I got up late this morning and put them on the wrong wa-THAT'S NONE OF YOUR GOD DAMN BUSINESS!"

"How do you put underwear on the wrong way?" Moxxie asked.

"Lick my ass you twink, that's how!"

"Again, it's 'kiss my ass', Blitzø."

"Mine's still better."

Naruto hated being right at times. It was clear to any sane person that this experience was gonna be the mother of all headaches.

"Sorry, toots, we're not taking…Wait, the fuck am I saying. Welcome to I.M.P.! I'm Blitzø the O is silent!"

"What O?"

"Exactly, sugar tits," Naruto's eye twitched, "So, what can I do ya? Just so you know, we're running a half-off Spring Break special."

"No! No, no, no! Not looking to get anyone killed," Naruto quickly explained.

"Beat it then. It's our busiest time of the year and we got no room for cheapskates or, Satan forbid it, Yatzer's Witnesses," Blitzø along with the other three member of shuddered. If Jehovah's Witnesses were bad, the satanic equivalent was worse.

"…I don't know what that last bit's about. I'm here because you guys are hiring?"

"…Come again?"

"You are hiring, right?" Naruto handed him a poster that, sure enough, explained that I.M.P. was hiring.

"Those posters are still up?" Loona inquired, finally looking up from her phone.

"Uh, yeah?"

"...Whoa. Tall one," Loona noted and easily taller than Vortex the hellhound noted, and he was well above seven feet.

"How long ago were they posted?"

"Not important! You're hired, lady!"

"Seriously?" that was both easy and a little concerning.

"Hiya! I'm Millie. This lil' cutie here's ma husband, Moxxie. That there's our boss, Blitzø, and this 'ere's his daughter, Loona," introduced the female imp.

"Adopted," Loona felt the need to emphasize.

"Hold on, sir! Not to point out the obvious-

"That you're a tiny, baby-wiener haver? Yeah, we know that already," Blitzø snickered.

Judging by the smaller imp's facial expression Naruto concluded this was a regular occurrence, "How do we know she's even qualified for the job? For all we know, she could be like Loona."

"Fuck you, Fatty," Loona saluted the imp with a single digit.

"I AM NOT FAT!"

"You could stand to put a salad in your meals," Blitzø added.

"But I'm not fat!"

"Dead."

"Pardon?" Millie asked.

"You're all dead," Naruto twirled a red marker, "Eight points: Larynx, spine, lungs, liver, jugular, subclavian artery, kidneys, heart."

"The fuck?!" Blitzø looked and saw various red marks on his suit and quickly spotted them on Millie, Moxxie and Loona.

"Satisfied?"

"Very! Welcome aboard…what's your name?"

"Kushina. Name's Kushina," Naruto decided to use his mother's name.

"Kushina? Pretty sure I smoked something like that not that long ago. Ha! You're named after pot!"

Naruto was already annoyed by the imp that was now his new but, thankfully, temporary employer, "I'm gonna need to stock up on aspirin, aren't I?"

"Here's a place where you can get it in bulk," Moxxie passed the disguised demon a card.

"Thanks. Before I forget, I have a friend-"

"Stop right there. We don't do employee discounts for friends and families," Blitzø quickly interjected, "Also, you're paying for our dry cleaning."

"Noted. But she's looking for a job, too."

"Oh, fuck yeah! Two new employees! That'll teach that overused snatch of a-Wait, she hot?"

"And then some," Naruto laughed, "She should be here in a couple of-"

The door to I.M.P.'s office opened before Naruto could continue, "Sorry, 'bout that. Things were starting to get-"

"Karlach?!" Blitzø exclaimed.

Wait what?

"YOU!" Karlach roared while Blitzo screamed as the taller demon suddenly summoned a huge axe that threatened to split him in two.

"Great, another ex?" Loona asked her adopted father and employer.

"YOU FUCKING SHITSTAIN! GET OVER HERE! YOU RUINED MY LIFE!" it was only fair that he'd pay with his own.

"Sounds like it," Moxxie knew it was wrong but he was very much enjoying the drama unfolding.

"Kush! Save me!"

Naruto's left eye began to twitch at the nickname but did as he was asked.

So much for good impressions.

(Sometime Later)

"Good work. Make sure you don't give yourselves away. And Karlach... do your best not to kill your new employer," Carmilla told her before the call was disconnected.

The silence that followed in the car as Karlch drove him to a spot that was close to the hotel was uncomfortable. Despite her attempt to kill, almost successfully, the founder of I.M.P., Karlach had been hired on as well. Though at a severely reduced pay that almost resulted in him being cut in half by the taller female demon.

Blitzø instead earned himself a black eye for his trouble.

Why Karlach had gotten hired after that stunt had Naruto questioning the imp's sanity. Was it guilt? Was Blitzø a masochist? Was he just plain nuts? A combination of different reasons? Naruto was curious to know but respected Karlach's privacy. Luckily for them, their job with I.M.P. wouldn't commence until tomorrow. In the meantime, Vaggie needed some fine-tuning in her fighting style. And stamina.

Both she and Charlie would thank him later.

That said, "Soooo...Wan-"

"Nope," Karlach quickly and flatly answered.

"Got it," Naruto decided not to push. Angry Karlach was scary Karlach, and while he could handle her Naruto didn't want to put a strain on their relationship.

"Of all the fucking people," he heard Karlach mutter.

"For someone who doesn't want to talk about it, you're talking about it," Naruto pointed out.

"Hah, it's…it's a long story."

"Ex?"

"Hah! He wishes."

"Friends with benefits?"

"He probably wishes that too."

"...Was he bad in bed?"

"Why does it keep going back to sex?"

"The impression I got from him."

Karlach wanted to dispute it but even though she hadn't seen the founder of I.M.P. in a very long time she recalled that even back then he had a bit of an appetite, "I'll give you that one, but no. We never fucked."

"Pretty sure you'd be the one doing the fucking," Naruto laughed.

"Pretty sure he'd like it," Karlach shot back, "Let's just say that we knew one another a long time ago before disaster struck. A lot of people cut ties with him. A lot of us imps did."

"You're an imp?" that was unexpected.

Karlach laughed, "Heh, yeah that's the usual reaction I get. Most of us are small, diminutive with the tallest of imps usually being no bigger than an average human woman. My family's the exception, we're giants compared to them. Any imp as tall as me is usually treated with a bit of fear and envy among our kind cuz they think we're Satan's direct descendants."

"Are you?" Naruto recalled that Satan, the Sin many in the human world confused for Lucifer as the King of Hell, and the second strongest of the Sins, was seen as a deity to imps. Apparently he was said to be an imp of great stature in many senses of the word.

Karlach shrugged, "Never bothered to ask mum. Never cared really. Not that I could ask her now anyway."

"My condolences," it was easy for the blond to understand the implications.

"Thanks. Anyway, can we just drop it? Still can't believe we gotta work for that little shit, and against an old friend. And for a stupid parking space!" who the hell fought that hard for a parking space?

"She said she was his ex, too?" exactly how such a guy like Blitzø ended up with someone like Verosika given his ...charming personality left Naruto more than a bit curious.

"No idea how the little fucker managed that, but yeah," Verosika hadn't gone into detail on how that came about, not that Karlach was in all that interested in knowing either when she learned of it, "Better watch yourself."

"Why?"

"She's a succubus. Demons that are the literal embodiment of lust. Most sinners and hellborn are resistant to their allures but given your uniqueness-"

"Ah, crap," Naruto cursed his luck.

"Could be worse, soldier. She's a sweet lay," Karlach revealed.

"You two dated?" Naruto was starting to wonder if everyone in Hell was bisexual, or if that was the majority.

"Me and her? Nah. More fuck buddies and friends with benefits. Acted as a bodyguard more than once for a few of her gigs. Did it to relieve stress. Left that old life on good terms when Carmilla helped me out and hired me. Fortunately, she's got Tex. Good bloke. Laid back but he knows how to take a job seriously and he's a decent drinker," Karlach recalled the good times she had with the hellhound.

"You had sex to relieve stress?" Naruto wasn't judging, though he knew of healthier ways of doing it.

Though none quite as fun... or pleasurable if he was honest.

"Well, that and smoking. Or both. But V doesn't care for the smell of it. Bit of warning-"

"I saw," Naruto groaned, recalling the not-so-subtle looks Verosika's group and Verosika sent his way whilst he was disguised.

"Got no one to blame but yourself, soldier. Succubi and incubi sleep with almost anyone but they have an inherent desire to be with someone unique, much like hellhounds generally have an inherent desire to seek out their mates with someone powerful. It's almost like a sixth sense," Karlach told him.

Stupid awesome uniqueness that was himself!

"You good here?" Karlach stopped the vehicle.

"Close enough, thanks."

"See ya tomorrow!" Karlach waved as she drove off.

XxXxX

"Ughhhhhh."

"You okay, toots?" Angel Dust asked Vaggie.

"Ughhhhhh."

"Imma guessing dat's a no," the pornstar laughed.

"If I had any strength in my legs and wings I'd run you through," Vaggie threatened. It had been a day since her last training session and her body was still sore and weak.

"But ya don't," Angel Dust snarked.

"Angel, leave Vaggie alone. Told you, you needed the rest," Charlie reminded her girlfriend.

"Not in the mood, babe. That blond idiot's a real slave master," Vaggie was sorely regretting her decision to allow Naruto to train her.

Torture was a more appropriate word.

"Who's the bigger idiot? The idiot doing the training or the idiot who agreed to it?" Husk smirked.

"Cállate, pendejo!" Vaggie cursed twice over as her sudden rose caused her legs to spasm, "You did that on purpose."

"Me? Why would I do that," despite his outward appearance showing otherwise, Husk's face was positively Cheshire.

"Well executed, Husker. Good show!" Alastor complimented.

Vaggie cursed some more at the Radio Demon's arrival.

"Are you dead?" Niffty prodded.

"Is that a real question?" Vaggie couldn't tell with Niffty at times.

"I got a real question," spoke Ana, "Are you guys for fucking real?"

"Why isssss ssssshe here?" Pentious asked as he came down the stairs.

"Ya mean she's not here for yous?" Angel asked the serpent inventor.

"Much assss I love inventing, I alsssso love living. Though calling it that issss quite the stretch at times," Pentious added with a somber look.

"Then, why are ya here for?" Angel asked the overlord's daughter.

"Issssn't it obvious? She's waiting for ssssomeone tall, blond, whiskered-

"And well hung and not afraid to go downtown," Ana added with a smile.

"God damn it, people! It's way too early for this shit!" Husk went back to cleaning bottles. One sexual deviant living here was bad enough.

"It's almost noon?"

"Still way too fucking early," Husk parried back.

"Go on," Angel prodded the daughter of an overlord.

"Please don't," Charlie pleaded, but then quickly realized something, "Wait, you and Naruto are together?"

"Took you that long to piece it together? Why wouldn't I? He's caring, warm, funny and protective-"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, back to da good stuff, toots," Angel told Ana.

"Oh, shit."

"Vaggie? You okay?" Charlie heard the curse come from the angel.

"I'm fine...well, fine-ish. But she won't be," Vaggie nodded towards Ana.

"Why?"

"Two words: your aunt."

"...Oooooohhhhh, shiiiiiitttt," Charlie grimaced as she pieced things together. Her aunt Michelle wasn't gonna like this, "Well, she's been in Heaven for about a month so-"

Wham!

"Aaaaahhhh!" Charlie, Ana, and Vaggie shouted as their imaginations ran wild.

"Okay, where is he?!" but the voice didn't belong to Heaven's Greatest Warrior.

"Dad?!" Charlie gawked at her father's sudden arrival, "What are you doing here?"

"Looking for the blond asshole that fucked my sister!"

"Ew! Dad! Think the words before you-"

"I know. I know. I heard it when I said it," Lucifer admitted, "Now where is he?! The amount of shit I'm getting from Heaven is driving me nuts! I haven't slept in days!"

"Hold up there, short-stuff," Angel interjected.

"Bad move," Vaggie knew how bringing up the King of Hell's height was a sensitive subject.

"Yer tellin' me dis guy's the Big Dick himself? Seriously?"

"He is shorter in real life than I expected," Alastor agreed.

"I may be small, but big where it counts. Just ask my wife," Lucifer grinned.

"What did I just say!" Charlie barked at her father.

"Oh, grow up sweetie. How'd you think you and Aurora were conceived?"

"Aurora?"

"...Oh, right. You don't know about your half-sister I conceived with Eve," Lucifer revealed.

"MY WHAT?!"

"Oooh, drama," Angel Dust was loving this.

"Does this happen often around here?" Ana asked the Radio Demon.

"Almost hourly, my dear," Alastor smiled, for more reasons than one given recent revelations.

"I HAVE A HALF-SISTER?!" Charlie could only wonder why she was not told. She also wondered why she was learning about unknown family members like this.

"That was a joke! I'm just trying to break the ice here," Lucifer told his only child.

"WELL, YOU FAILED!" jokes were meant to be funny!

"Uhh...What's going on?"

Looking at the entrance everyone in the hotel spotted the target of Lucifer's search.

"Oooh, the drama escalates," Angel Dust couldn't wait to see how this unfolded.

"YOU!"

"What do you want, Top Hat? I'm here to train Vaggie. Her stamina's crap."

"SAVE ME!" three guesses who wailed.

"Really, no short jokes?" Angel ignored - partially - Vaggie's screams. He was half expecting some vertically challenged-related humour to come from Naruto's mouth.

"Hey, I used to be short when I was alive," more so as a child before he went through a great growth spurt, "so don't expect that from me."

"Whatever, you and I-" Lucifer froze.

"...Yes?" Naruto asked as he approached the considerably shorter demon.

...

"Uh, you okay?"

...

"Hello?" Naruto snapped his fingers in front of Lucifer but got no reaction, "Is there an on switch or something?"

Lucifer finally spoke, "Something wicked this way comes."

"...Huh?"

"Dad, are you-"

Wham!

From the entranceway stood a short, squat flapper-looking woman who began to sing.

It's me!

Yes, it's me!

I know you were all waiting m-AAAAAHHHH!"

Until she was suddenly flung into the wall courtesy of a newly arrived and unhinged-looking Michelle.

"Thank fuck," Husk muttered.

"Hey, Aunty M! How you...doin'?" Angel was a bit unnerved by how she looked.

She looked haggard and horny as Hell.

"Uh, sis? You okay?" a scared Lucifer asked.

"YOU!" Michelle ignored Angel and her brother and pointed at Naruto.

"Me? What did I-"

"No talk! Need you! Bedroom! NOW!" Michelle ordered. It had been difficult to try and find her way here and took up a lot of time even with Gabriel's behind-the-scenes assistance.

"Huh? Whoa!" Naruto found himself hoisted on Michelle's right shoulder. Naruto wished he could say this was new...but he'd be lying. Hinata had her intense horny moments when she was pregnant.

"Hey! Back off, sister! He's mine!" Ana shouted at the many times more powerful being that was stealing her man, "Eep!"

Ana quickly found herself on the archangel's left shoulder. Both Naruto and Ana looked at one another with confused looks before, quick as a flash, they found themselves in a bedroom.

"...For the sake of my sanity please lie and say I didn't just see that."

"We didn't see that," Charlie lied to her father, more so because her sanity was on the line, too.

"Thank you, hon-"

"Clothes off now!" Michelle was heard ordering, "Momma needs her foot long!"

"Naw. They're definitely fucking!" Angel chortled at Michelle's comment. Lucifer and Charlie looked ready to kill him a hundred times over. Not that it would do any good.

"Hey, what about me?!"

"Here! Put that mouth of yours to good use, little demon!" Michelle ordered once again.

"Ha! They're having an orgy."

"No, they're not."

"Uhh, yeah, they are."

"Okay, not to get all technical but an orgy requires a minimum of six people. It goes masturbation, a couple, threesome, two couples swinging, two couples and a Lookie-Lou and then orgy."

.

..

...

"What?"

"WHY ARE YOU TELLING US THIS, DAD!" Charlie couldn't believe this conversation was happening.

"It's basic knowledge, honey," Lucifer didn't bat an eye at his daughter's outburst.

"DID YOU FORGET THAT'S YOUR SISTER YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT?"

"It's called repressed memories, sweetie. In my mind, that's not my sister up there...Though it wouldn't be the first time she did this-NO! Stop, bad memories stay locked up!" Lucifer was smacking his head with his cane.

Charlie said it before, she'd say it again: what the fuck was wrong with her father's side of the family?

"Whatever. Orgy, or threesome, we need to nip this in the bud. I am not going without sleep again!" Vaggie told Lucifer.

"Now you're talking about three girls and a guy named Bud," her father's comment had Charlie's eye twitching. After being absent for a month the damn spasm was back.

"I want mommy," Charlie lamented the absence of the Queen of Hell.

"I want her too. I miss having mind-blowing sex," Lucifer admitted.

"WHY!?" Charlie wailed.

"Hey! Can someone fucking help me off the wall!" Mimzy shouted.

"...Who's that?" Lucifer asked.

"A fucking headache, at best," Husk answered, "A huge pain in the ass at worst."

"Just get me down, ya drunk!" Mimzy commanded.

"Make momma some clones!" came a shout from upstairs.

"Me too!" Ana was heard next.

"Let the orgy begin!" Angel cackled.

Charlie's brain shut down from those words; Lucifer continued to smack his head, albeit a little harder now.

(Elsewhere in Hell)

"This is...quite concerning," spoke a tall royal garbed owl demon, having ended his call with the rest of the higher ups of the Ars Goetia, his father included.

"Concerning? Is that all you can say about it?!"

"What would you have me do, Stella? This Angelslayer is clearly a powerful demon. Perhaps even more powerful than a Sin if he managed to defeat an archangel, and the strongest of them as well if father's warnings were to go by. Maybe even more powerful than His Majesty himself."

"And you don't see how this is a fucking problem?! Gods, you're an embarrassment, Stolas," not for the first time in her sham of a marriage did Stella feel annoyed, if she was being king, by her so called husband. How could he not see how bad this was?

"What are you two arguing about?" their daughter asked. She didn't care but her phone just died and she was stuck between them until she could find some excuse to leave. With her father it much easier and little to no excuses were needed. Not so much with her mother.

"Your fool of a father is isn't taking the matter with the Angelslayer seriously as he should. Don't you realize the implications-"

"I know the implications, thank you very much!" Stolas shot back, already well irritated by his wife, "The difference is what do you expect me, or any of us, to do about it? Sinner or not, this being is powerful! Very powerful! Do you understand? Powerful! We Goetia rank third in terms of power and our unique capabilities among the denizens of Hell but none of us have ever gone against Heaven's army, or an an archangel for that matter, and humiliated them so utterly. Father at best is as strong as a Sin, but even he wouldn't dare face Archangel Michelle."

"So that's it then? Thousands of years and now we're just going to let this upstart plebian destroy how things are supposed to work? You're going lay on your back and let this little fuck, fuck you? Why am I not surprised you'd allow this."

"Here we go," Octavia knew what was coming and hated it.

"This has nothing to do-"

"It has everything to do with this, imp sucker!"

"Shrew!"

"Hahahaha! Are you a fucking child?! What kind-"

"Overstuffed Thanksgiving Dinner!"

"HOW DARE YOU!"

Octavia tried to make herself as invisible as she could as her parents, once again, began their loud daily bickering.

"Stella, if you don't like it then leave! No one's forcing you to stay here," Stolas had enough.

"Smartest thing you've ever said!" Stella rose from her seat, "But mark my words, this isn't the end of this!"

The Goetia were he nobles of Hell. There was no way she, nor others of her kind, would allow such an individual to come along and change how things were. How things were supposed to be. If she had to take matters into her own hands because her imp bitch of a husband lacked the spine and balls to do something about it, Stella would take matters into her own hands.

(Meanwhile)

"Fucken bastard-ah!-No good-oh-sexy sack of shit!" Velvet's eyes were glowing red as she looked at the screen on her phone, a picture of Naruto was on it, "How could you do-oh, God!- this to me you fucking stuuuuuuddd!"

Velvet finally reached her climax.

"I thought I was the one with the sick kinks," a voice laughed.

"DAMN IT VALENTINO! FUCKING KNOCK!" Velvette covered herself.

"I did," especially after the unpleasantness that occurred the last time he entered without doing so, "You were too busy fucking yourself to notice. Still have the hots for the Angelslayer, even after he turned your ass red?"

As the moth overlord laughed, Velvette had hellfire in her eyes and she was tempted to rip off his newly regenerated arm and beat him with it. A month later and Valentino and countless others still laughed whenever they brought up the video of her being spanked, before it was taken down by Vox, though some had managed to download said video before the TV Demon did so it still popped up every now and then. Much to Vox's displeasure. But Velvet didn't doubt he had a copy himself for shits and giggles.

Velvet had been torn. For one, it humiliated her to no end and her rep had taken a serious hit, and that of the Vees in general, the latter being the main reason why Vox was pissed.

Two, it was the most-watched video on the internet, and countless memes and remixes had since come into being as a result. Three, it left Velvet conflicted and erratic with her feelings towards the Angelslayer. She hated him as much as she lusted after him. The reasons for the latter part were unknown to her. Or so she claimed.

Valentino merely called her a masochist. Pure and simple. A statement Velvet denied despite it fitting the bill.

"Get dressed. Or don't. I don't care," Vox would but Valentino didn't give a shit, "Vox said he has good news."

"'Bout what?"

"Didn't tell me. Just said to get you and then meet him in the lounge," Valentino frowned at the secrecy.

"Damn flat-faced prick," Velvet knew from experience that Vox usually did this as a form of power fix.

They were allies, but their relationship wasn't the healthiest at times. And were it not for how they made their contracts they'd have killed one another for their own benefit if the opportunity arose. Valentino's stunt at the hotel had been a prime example.

The Vees were partners but that didn't mean each of them considered themselves equals. Vox considered himself the smartest of the group. Velvet was the backbone and savviest. And Valentino was the most ruthless and dangerous.

As a result of their monopolies in Pride, their combined assets made them the overlords who owned the most souls in the Pride Ring.

Well, that was Valentino's opinion, if she was honest. Not every overlord made themselves known according to Vox. Some remained behind the scenes with little to no knowledge on who they were, or where they were, and what they did.

One was lucky to hear a whisper of them.

Alastor had been one such individual before the infamous Radio Demon made himself known for all of Hell.

And despite not having as many souls to his name compared to the Vees, despite being in Hell longer than the group, Alastor was still a powerful and feared demon.

Having a large amount of souls to one's name didn't automatically make them more powerful than others. Oh, it boosted their power and influence greatly, but how that power was used depended on the individual. Some sinners, much like hellborn demons, were simply blessed with superior power and talent.

And Alastor was an enigma ever since he arrived in Hell for he wielded strange powers that, from what Vox claimed, were usually reserved to hellborn on the upper rank of the hierarchy. Alastor's strange and unique abilities as a sinner were only outdone by the Angelslayer.

And both were chummy with the Princess of Hell. Velvet knew that something had to be done about that. Alastor was bad enough. The man always had some hidden agenda, according to Vox. Any deal made with the Princess of Hell by him wasn't going to end well for anyone he saw as an enemy.

Alastor lived for entertainment. And him seeing the Vees fall from grace would be considered one of the greatest forms of entertainment in all of Hell.

"You done yet?" Valentino's call cut her from her musings, "Seriously, my sluts dress faster than you."

"Fucken hang on," Velvet told the moth sinner before she added the finishing touches before she and Valentino left to go and see Vox.

Both watched as the souls within their employ gave the overlords a wide berth all the way to the conference room where they spotted a smiling Vox speaking with the press. Beside him was-

"Angel Dust?!" Valentino was heard asking.

Velvet blinked. It was true, the individual looked very much so like Angel Dust. But this wasn't Angel Dust.

"Ah, Velvet. Valentino. Please take a seat. As I was just telling everyone we've acquired a new talent for your studio, Val. Say hello, to your newest star: Molly," Vox introduced the woman before handing over a signed contract.

"...Ohohahahaha!" Valentino couldn't help the red smoke that escaped from him, "Welcome, my dear. I expect great things from you."

Velvet stood still from where she was standing. This was either going to end very well or very badly. She prayed it wasn't the latter.

This was Angel Dust's twin sister after all.

IMPORTANT NOTE: I have added certain to this chapter. I realized that some of the stuff that was supposed to be there never appeared when I uploaded it. However, as you all know, Fanfiction was acting up these last few days, and of course on the day I finally updated, too. It appears things are fine now so people should be able to see it now.

First off, I know Molly may be in Heaven based on a character that looks a lot like her, but that could just be a cameo or another character that looks like one of her earlier designs. Info about her is very old, 4 years old, and we all know things changed from when the pilot came out. We don't know whether that character is in Heaven or Hell, but in this story, she's in Hell.

Second, sorry for the wait. I got a new job that and there were other things that occurred such Fanfiction still acting up and making it difficult to update (took me twelve tries). This should have been updated last week but some of things needed to be taken out as they didn't fit nicely and will be used in future chapters. I already have more than 2k and 3k worth of words for them.

Also, any guesses who War is? If you guess right, I'll give you a shout out in my next chapter.

Enjoy people! Kindly review tons 70-80 would be nice, more would be better, and if I get them within a week, I will update the next chapter by the week of July 1st, 2024. Plus I'd like to know what you did and didn't like.