Disclaimer: If you want it, I probably don't own it.

"How dare he?!?!?!?!?!" screamed Spearsilver to the wind. "That…that…less than Meara scum! He nuzzled her! He nuzzled her. He nuzzled her. He nuzzled her." His raging italics set metaphorical fire to the trees, which he galloped through with speed and anger. When he had outrun the memory and gone as far as his inferior legs could take him, he stopped. A Gollum-ish debate took place inside his head. On one side stood an Asfaloth-like, angelic creature who smiled tranquilly at him and told him that Shadowfax was his friend, and that he ought to forgive him for this passing fancy. On the other side stood a cruel horse like a Nazgûl steed who flared its blood-red nostrils and told him to smash both his former friend and his sweetheart into tiny oozing pieces.

"He is your friend, despite everything," said the Asfaloth-horse calmly. "It's only an infatuation. Don't let a mare break up the most wonderful friendship that this herd has ever seen." He began to sing:

We will always be friends!

In good times and bad!

And when I fall off of a cliff you will save me!

And if I'm lying in the middle of a road you won't let them pave me!

Because we're friends!

Friends! Friends! That's what we are!

We go together like salt and tar!

Like near and far!

Like fish and bar!

And we are always friends!

We won't let a half-breed mare disrupt our friendship!

Because that's how close our friendship is!

It's always to me that you can always turn!

If you're on fire, I won't let you burn!

Because we're friends!

Friends! Friends! That's what we are!

We go together like salt and tar!

Like near and far!

Like fish and—

The highly emotional song was cut off by the Nazgûl-horse shrieking, "No! He betrayed you! He values her love more than your friendship! You will always be second-best! Second-best, while the best is a half-breed! Can you feel the indignity souring your soul? You must rid yourself of them both! Trust me, I'm evil. You should always trust the evil ones, especially when you're one of the main character's friends."

Spearsilver cocked his head thoughtfully. It did seem logical. He charged off to his herd, to Shadowfax's sire, prepared to tell all. He would let King Riverstar deal with them.

A/N: That's right, the song in that chapter was more stupidity brought to you by the sadistic author! I could hear various Disney characters singing it, which was extremely scarring. I am VERY sorry that I took so long updating. *flings self upon the ground* Thank you dear reviewers, you brighten my day/night/extremely early morning. *hands out Susan™ and Death™ action figures as companions for My Little Binky™* (Dang, I would love a Death™ action figure…*sighs wistfully*)

And to J.M.M.Harris, I give UberFun!Objects of Randomity™ for correctly guessing where I semi-thieved the lines in chapter three from. *does the HappyPraise!Dance for J.M.M.Harris*