Of Weddings and Names

Summary: It's Jackie and Viper's wedding day (finally!). But as he's about to say his vows, he suddenly realizes he doesn't even know his fiancée's real name.

Pairings: Jackie/Viper, of course!

Disclaimer: I have never in the past owned it, I don't own it now, and I doubt I'll ever own it in the future. Sadly. Oh, and I borrowed a line from the TV show Sabrina, the Teenage Witch- I don't own that, either.

A/N: This is sort of a companion to "Hanging by a Moment", but not really. It was written to explain this really stupid scene I wrote where Jackie tells Jade Viper's real name. This is going to be a very strange fic, I'm warning you now. You can flame me if you want, but remember that I did warn you. ^_^

*~*~*

When Jackie and Viper decided to get married, they had agreed that they didn't want a big ceremony. Both were very outgoing but easily embarrassed people.

That was how they found themselves in a small, quaint, and lovely church on May 29th. The only people there, besides themselves and the minister, were the rest of the J-team, including Uncle and Paco but excluding Jade. Jackie really missed his lively niece, but she'd returned to Hong Kong and her parents. He'd wanted her to visit, but the day had happened to fall on her best friend's birthday, and the two fifteen-year-olds were taking a three-day vacation to Moose World. He'd really thought Jade would grow out of that by now, but it gave him a warm feeling inside to know that some things never changed.

Viper and Jackie had had a long fight over what she had to wear. She wasn't thrilled about wearing a huge, fluffy white dress, and it had taken them quite a while to find one she found suitable. Inwardly, Jackie agreed with her, and thought that she looked better in black. Not that she didn't look beautiful now.

Blushing furiously, Jackie began to say his wedding vows. "I, Jackie, take you, Vi- uhh…" He glanced frantically around. What was her real name? She merely raised an eyebrow at him, and the minister looked puzzled. Why, oh why hadn't they practiced this?

"Um, could we have a moment?" Jackie asked the startled minister. "Viper, what is your name?" he asked in a frantic whisper.

"Viper's good," she answered swiftly.

"I- you- I can't say that! I need to know your name. It probably wouldn't be legal!"

She crossed her arms and gave him her patented stare. Finally she sighed. "Oh, all right, honey, my name is- oh. Never mind. Trust me, use Viper."

"I'm not using Viper!" he said loudly. "What's he going to say at the end, 'Mr. and Mrs. Jackie and Viper Chan?'"

She bit her lip. "It's better than the alternative."

"What's the alternative?" he asked, getting frustrated. He could hear Uncle complaining to Tohru in the background.

"Fine. Anne," she snapped. "Happy now?"

"What's wrong with Anne?" he asked, glowering. "It's a perfectly respectable name." Seeing her about to respond, he quickly continued his vows loudly. "I, Jackie, take you, Anne…"

*~*~*

He found out what she'd meant at the end. The minister, beaming proudly, announced them to the few present. "I present to you, for the first time, Mr. and Mrs. Jackie and Anne Chan!"

"Oops," he mumbled as they walked quickly down the isle, ignoring the music. "Maybe you should have kept your maiden name."

She tightened her grip on his arm. "Ow!" he cried.

"A bit late for that," she said, glowering. "Besides, my name was actually Anne Whigan."

Jackie turned to look at her. "Who were your parents?" he asked in amazement. They reached the car.

"Never mind," she said, climbing in the drivers seat.

"Uh- Viper- I mean, Anne-"

"Shut up and get in," she said, pointing at the passenger's seat.

"But- aren't I supposed to drive-"

She glared at him again and he quit. He got in the car. Unconsciously, Viper (Anne) said the words that Jade would echo in seven years' time- "I'm starting to think I got off rough marrying you."

A/N: That probably didn't make a lot of sense unless you read Hanging by a Moment. So what are you waiting for? Go read it! I like it. ^_^ Review, please!!