Elessar's Consort: Legolas

By MysticHakai24

Disclaimer: I do not own anyone: Aragorn, Legolas, Arwen, Eldarion, etc. But I do own the repulsive Lord Hanmos and his people. The fabulous characters belong to Mister Tolkien.

Summary: With Arwen on another visit to Lothlorien, and the Lord of a large country demanding to see Gondor's King and his family, Aragorn has no choice but to get a substitute consort...Legolas, anyone? SLASH A/A*A/L

Chapter Two: Gifts of Plenty

Aragorn had led the people (except the guards) to the lounge. The room had a dark reddish tint, many large comfortable chairs and some dim lights. A servant raised the blinds of some windows and the room became much brighter.

Aragorn invited everybody to sit, and they did. He then ordered another servant to fetch some tea and home-made biscuits. Soon, each person was chewing graciously and sipping from fine crystal goblets.

"Lord Elessar," Lord Hanmos said, smiling wide, showing some golden teeth, "I must compliment the decorations of this room and the skills of your bakers. These biscuits are rather delicious, and I do believe I had a good share in the taste of pastries." Hanmos set down his mug and finished the pastry in his rough hand. He stood and smiled. "I would like to introduce to you my royal advisor, Sir Namw? of Calintie. He is both bold and wise."

Sir Namw? was very tall, Aragorn noted as the man stood and bowed. His hair was very finely cut, there were no stray strands, his nose was rather large, and he held the look of treachery. "Thank you, milord Hanmos," the man slurred, his words had a strong accent and were chopped.

Hanmos then introduced his son. "This is my heir, Honing, of Calintie." The boy gave an undignified grunt, but he then stood and also bowed, non-too gracefully. He was much tanned, more so than Aragorn, and his hair was gelled (a gel, in this era, was some sweet-smelling sap from a tree) back, leaving a few strands of his mossy red hair, the same colour of his father's. He was sneering and seemed capable of much mischief.

Hanmos smiled at Aragorn, communicating that it was his turn. So Aragorn stood and he introduced the leader of his band of servants, the head of the guard, his royal advisor, and he suddenly noticed that his son was nowhere to be found. Aragorn peered amongst the room, when not sighting him; he turned to his servants and said quietly, "Where is Eldarion?"

Legolas heard and he stood, and almost tripped as he was not used to having his feet bound together by the dress. "I will search for him," he announced.

But before he could leave the room, Hanmos stood and he grinned. "My, who is this fair maiden?" Legolas halted and he grimaced.

Aragorn signaled the servants to find the young prince. "Ah, this, my good man, is my consort. Please meet Legolas Songing Telcontar."

Hanmos bowed and he took Legolas' pale hand and kissed it. Legolas smiled nervously, pulling his hand back rather nervously and sticking it behind him so that the Lord could not watch as he rubbed the remaining saliva on his dress. "Greetings to you too, milord," Legolas murmured.

"Legolas, Legolas... I have heard of that name from a place before, but I cannot recall. Have we met before?" Hanmos inquired, his eyes turning on the spot where the tailors had to stuff extra padding as to not make Legolas seem flat-chested.

"Err," Legolas glanced at Aragorn before replying. "You see, the first syllable of my name is a limb that each person has and the other syllables you have heard of not two minutes before when dear Estel introduced me." Legolas glanced at Aragorn who, if this were some anime or manga, would have been sweat-dropping.

"I see," Hanmos answered blankly as he seated himself.

Some servants rushed in, a child between them. "Mommy!" Eldarion squealed as he ran and embraced one of his 'mother's' legs.

"Yes, um, this is my son and heir, Eldarion," Aragorn said. He sighed in relief when Eldarion turned and bowed politely.

"Charming, energetic child, Lord Elessar," complimented Namw?.

Before Aragorn could thank him, Eldarion stared and stated quite loudly, "You have a big nose, mister. Does it help you smell better? 'Because if it does, then that weird smell is my cat's droppings." Legolas and Aragorn looked down disapprovingly but Eldarion did not notice.

"I am sorry," Legolas gasped. He then led Eldarion out of the lounge with him, murmuring. "I shall take him to his room. He shall be punished for that unneeded comment, Sir Namw?."

The man was sizing his nose now. "No, no, 'tis quite all right, miss."

"Yes, Sir Namw? minds not," replied Hanmos nervously. "Ah! I have brought gifts from our land! Please I would like to give to each of you personally."

Eldarion's eyes brightened. "Ooh! Presents! Uncl- I mean, Mommy! Can we open presents? Please? Please?" By this time, he was jumping from excitement.

Aragorn sensed this and he quickly allowed his son to remain.

Firstly, Namw? revealed a small armour, made for Eldarion, but still a few sizes too large. "I knew not your son's size, so I merely sized my own Honing. I hope you can put this off for a few years," Hanmos apologized. But then he brightened. "Mithril," he said with glee. "This is completely mithril, harder than diamonds but lighter than any feather."

Eldarion accepted the gift politely. But when he turned, he murmured, "Poopy presents."

To Aragorn he offered a golden bow and a silk quiver, in it were beautiful arrows crafted by Man. They were heavier than those that Aragorn were accustomed to. However, he put on a grateful smile and thanked the Lord courteously.

Finally, to Legolas, they gave a box. Within the gift was a long and pale pink corset. "Ah-hem, it is the latest fashion in Calintie," explained Hanmos excitedly. "I would be glad to see you try it on, fair maiden."

"She will be beautiful," nodded Namw?.

Eldarion wanted now to eat. But it was nowhere near supper and lunch had already passed. There was no way his father would let him eat if he did not make an excuse. "Mommy! Mommy!"

Legolas, unfamiliar with being called a mother, had tuned everybody out, out of embarrassment. He could not see himself in such a tight-fitting outfit.

Eldarion, finally realizing that his supposed mother could not respond to his fa├žade, said "Legolas! I want to play Legolas!"

Legolas looked up and gave a bemused stare.

Eldarion nodded. "Yes, I want to play that new game, the one about green leaves, it's called Legolas! Let's go play it, Mommy!" Legolas at last understood and he smiled, "I thank you for your gift, Lord Hanmos, but I have to respond to my son' wishes."

Lord Hanmos sneered. "Why not bring my heir along as well? He has nothing to do; I promise he will be patient in learning and a fair loser. Will you not bring him with you?"

Honing smirked. "Yes, please, ma'am, can I learn?" he asked, feigning innocence.

Eldarion glared, but Legolas smiled, as he stuffed the corset back into its box and left it next to Aragorn. "Of course, Master Honing. Please join us. I will be sure to keep him from mischief. I will even let him meet, err, a friend of mine."

Aragorn let an eyebrow rise, but he only received a wink from his friend until they ran off. "Anyway," Aragorn said lightly. "As we could barely give you a proper introduction to the people of Gondor last night because of your abrupt entrance, I was thinking we could host a ball tonight, inviting all the free people of my kingdom."

"Splendid idea, Elessar King!" exclaimed Hanmos. "This is a perfect chance for your beloved wife to try on our gift, is it not? And I would be happy to gain a tour of your palace beforehand."

"Of course," Aragorn answered, he did not like how this man kept talking about 'his' wife, er, husband. His fake one, anyway.

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Author's Notes: Second chappie up! I hope you like it, not as long as the last one, and probably not as good too, but I'm in a hurry is my excuse. Please review! And here's a quick preview to the next chapter when I get it up:

Next Chapter: There are two Haldirs, one playing games with Eldarion and Honing, the other one is telling that Arwen is returning quickly because of an accident! Meanwhile, Legolas has to wear that tight corset and as many people do not know that Legolas is the queen at the moment, the poor elf has many hands to get away from! Hehehe...

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