Welcome, welcome, one and all! Run while you can, trust me! RUN NOW! *Clears throat*. Well, this is a collaboration between me and Chaotic Boredom, and it's a Zelda parody, and...uh...that's about it...*Glances over at Chaotic, who nods encouragingly* Yeah, that's it. So sit back on a cloud, relax, and enjoy! And RUN WHILE YOU CAN!


I'm making a short appearance here, cuz Shawshank forgot some stuff.

*This* denotes action, ~this~ is a comment for you from Shawshank, and ^this^ is one from me. "this" is standard talking.

The screen is entirely black, and for an instant we wonder if we've suddenly become blind and deaf. Then a deep voice echoes out of the darkness...

"In the vast, deep, dark forest of Hyrule..."

"Long have I served as the guardian whatchathingy...uh, I mean, spirit..."

"A whole bunch of spoiled brats live with me, and I've been trying to kick them out for years, only they all remember that I told them they'd die if they leave the forest…"

"They all have their own annoying little balls of light..."

"Except for that loser over there, you know, the one with the bad dreams all the time? I almost think he's lucky to not have a fairy..."


"Leave me alone!" Navi's little voice comes from underground.

"Navi, where the hell...uh, I mean, where art thou..."

"I'm sleeping!"


"Come here...hither...whatever..."

"I don't wanna!"





*Clears throat* "Yes, maybe not, but keep in mind that I'm about A BILLION TIMES as big as you, and I can do more than bash people on the head!"

"Whatever, I'm all awake now, so I'm coming."

*Navi stumbles out of little hole in ground, looking very grumpy indeed*

"Ahem hem. As I was saying...*adopts old british type voice.* Navi...dost thou feel it? Uh, Navi? Chickie? Dudette? Babe? HELLO? ANSWER ME!!!!"

*Navi wipes sleep out of eyes, flicking it at Dude Tree* "You mean the uncontrollable urge to injure you?"

"No, no, the climate of evil descending upon this realm! Goddesses, are you magic or not?"

"If I'm not, can I go back to sleep?"



"I am the Dude Tree! Hear me roar! Uh...I mean...anyway..."


"Mean guys are even now mustarding...with ketchup...and lots of pickles...wait... *Drools.* I want a hot dog..."

"And I wanna go back to sleep, but we can't all have what we want, so get on with it."

"Wow, you really *are* crabby! What, is it that time of month or something?"

"That's none of your business! Now hurry it up already!"

"Fine, fine...*drones in monotone.* For so long this boring forest filled with little brats has stood as a barrier thingy, beating up outsiders and making sure everybody's happy... But, with this huge tsunami of power, even I can't go surfing... It seems the time has come for that fairyless loser to get out of the forest...finally...thank the Goddesses... I mean, he's the whiniest one of them all!"

"WHAT? Your saddling me with HIM?! I'M NOT GONNA DO IT!"

"Hey, I don't get a choice in these things! It's not *my* fault! Blame those two stupid authors sitting up on those clouds and Myamoto, not me!"

~Shawshank and Chaotic Boredom wave down at them, grinning~


"I'm blaming you!" *Navi turns and flies off through the woods*

"Wait, Navi! I'm not done! You cut me off! Don't you want to know about that loser's heroic destiny and how the fate of the world is resting on your shoulders, even though he's the one doing all the running around?"

"Tell it to yourself!" Navi zooms away into the forest

*Mutters under breath* "Screw all fairies, anyway." *Shouts up at the authoresses* "Hey, cut to the next scene already, willya?"

AN: Heh heh, this is Chaotic Boredom, being annoying. ANs are fun, for me at least. Now, I order you to review! Now! Right there! See! *points furiously at little button* Until next Chapter!


Chaotic Boredom