Of Gold and Gems
Disclaimer: I don't own anything in the wonderful world of Middle Earth. I write for fun and use it as payment to my beta… who without I would suck horribly at grammar. Lol
Rating: PG to be cautious
Pairing: Grima/Eówyn and Grima/OC
Summary: Grima Wormtongue has always had a crush on Eówyn and believes she may harbor feelings towards him. What happens when he allows his emotions to show fully and the truth is laid out before him? Can he heal by himself or will there be another way to mend his broken heart?
Special Thanks to all my readers and reviewers and especially to my beta, who deserves a break from all my ramblings. Hope ya enjoy the fic gal!
Italics are Grima's thoughts.
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There! She looked over at me again! I knew that she would. We have a connection, a true connection to each other. She pretends to be cold towards me, she does not wish the others to know her true feelings that she harbors deep within her.
But I know what she feels. I can see it in her eyes. The way her eyes search mine. The way her bosom swells when she catches a glimpse of me. The way she walks quickly by, fearing her actions towards me when outsiders are around. She flees for herself and for me. She wishes to keep our love secret. The self reclusion is her way of protecting us both from unwanted stares and menacing whispers.
But we know the truth.
We can see it in each others eyes. Exchange entire conversations without words.
Oh yes, we are one in everything but body. But one day, the world will know of our love and we may announce it to the kingdom and consummate our joining forever.
Ah, she looked my way again. I feel she knows my thoughts. My presence is causing her heart to stir within her; I can see the slight hitch to her breathing, the shallow rise and fall of her chest.
King Theoden is with his counsel. I have tried to persuade him against them but it takes time to build a good strong foundation before full settlement into his mind can begin. His trust of me is growing, mainly I feel because he knows my intentions to his niece and how she treats her love for me. He openly sighs at his advisors and gives his kin a gentle smile.
Eówyn returns the gesture, then her eyes automatically seeks mine. Perhaps she needs solace? Perhaps she wishes me to rescue them from the drivel that the advisors place amongst them with their petty arguments and squabbles?
As if I bear wings upon me I glide over to rescue my love. She sees my approach and I notice her hand go to her uncles, no doubt her way of communicating to me that she wishes to be nearer to me.
"My Lords, I do believe Theoden King has heard enough for today. Perhaps some rest and refreshment is in order?" I say loudly as most of the advisors seem to ignore me completely.
I hear mumbles and discouraging expressions from them but Theoden waves his hand and agrees.
Time is up for the advisors. He wishes them to disband and allow some privacy to those that wish it.
And the word of the King is the law of the land.
"I agree. I have heard enough. I wish for some peace and quiet," King Theoden nearly shouted to his advisors making several jump.
The advisors scuffled out of the throne room in obvious bad temperament, their voices carefully lowered and muffled to not insight the wrath of their lord that was now rising from his jeweled throne and rubbing his temples vigorously.
Eówyn rose with her uncle, her eyes watching him closely, then flickered over to where Grima concealed himself in shadow, diligently lurking in the hidden recesses of the castle. A sudden chill went up her spine and she shuttered involuntarily, using every ounce of her resolve to not visibly tremble.
"I need some rest before we dine," Theoden said absent mindedly turning and retiring to his private chambers to alleviate his now thundering headache from all the bickering he had spent the day listening to.
With the king's absence, the room was empty except for the two now staring at each other, blue eyes boring into blue eyes.
"The most beautiful flower I have ever seen. Beauty and grace held in a fair stem, crowned with a flow of gold that rivals the wrought metal of the smiths," Grima said in a hushed tone as he approached the maiden of his desire.
Eówyn felt her heart leap up into her throat as the figure emerged from his shadowed retreat. She felt panic well up inside her as he drew near, stopping just a pace away and using hushed tones reserved mostly for children.
"I do not deserve such compliments," she said quickly, taking a subconscious step back.
"Then perhaps a flower you are not," Grima said silkily, floating towards her closer. "A flower loses its petals and wilts away. Perhaps you are more like the dawn of the day. Always returning and painting a dreary gray world full of color and light."
Eówyn looked away from the blue eyes that were staring intensely into her own as they drew nearer. She hated the new advisor that her uncle had hired, and repeatedly told him so. A nervous feeling filled her heart every time he was near, a strange inkling in her mind warned her that he was no good, and that she should be fearful of him.
"I am neither the flower, nor the dawn. I am the wind," she said turning her flaring eyes to him and giving him a stare that clearly said to back off. "I go where I may, never to be contained or seen. I race through the countryside of my own free will, bringing the chill of winter upon those that cross me."
"But to feel the caress of one so gentle," Grima said softly, his hand rising to touch the fair cheek.
Eówyn withdrew quickly from his presence and glared hard at him and said sternly, "I am not to be reckoned with. I have no desire for you to be near me. If you approach me in such a way again, I will have the guards deal with you."
Grima's smile faltered, "You know of my feelings for you. Perhaps with time.…"
Eówyn raised her hands to stop his explanation. "I know of them and I do not feel them in return. Leave me be and never think that I can alter my heart for you. Time will not change what will never be."
With a look of pure malice she stalked from the throne room, her billowing dress flowing around her like a thundercloud.
Grima held his breath for a moment, the reality of the scene unfolded slowly before his mind.
She does not want my love? But how that can be?
Grima felt his heart harden inside his chest as he started to walk, to where he didn't know. He let his feet decide on where he was going as his mind tumbled over what had just passed between his heart's desire and her words.
Realizing that he was wandering aimlessly through the halls of the palace of Rohan, he inhaled slowly and commanded his feet to stop moving. The lack of motion allowed his feelings to crash into him, catching up to his now still form and exploding into his mind.
The overwhelming sensations sent his world reeling, his vision spinning and turning into darkness as he felt his body literally slam into the icy surface of the flagstones that lined the expansive halls of the palace. The coldness in his heart was unmatched by even the most turbulent of winter winds, the highest mountain peak, the chill of the deep chasms of world where no light or life exists.
Pulling his legs to his chest he felt another chill run through his body. The bite of bitterness crept into his heart; stilling it against its natural bodily rhythm of life and encasing it in a blanket of harden metal, cold, unrelenting, and alone.
A racking sob escaped his throat as he buried his head in his hands, his forehead resting on his knees as the tears flowed freely and stained his clothes.
The fresh fallen snow has not felt solitude such as this. The pain is more than a person can bear.
Wails emerged, ones from the deepening abyss of his core, shattering their way up through a soul made of glass and sending the precious pieces down into a darkened shell of what once was. Dreams and possibilities now lost condemned before they even knew the light of day.
I will never know of love. My heart has been broken into so many pieces; it will never be whole again. My soul shall dwell in shadow from this time on.
Subconsciously wrapping his robes around his body, Grima shivered hard, his breathing coming in gasps as he tried to calm his still aching heart. Icy fingers of loneliness wrapped themselves around the wretched being's body and soul, squeezing unmercifully and snickering at the depth of sorrow pooling within.
Shuttering against the onslaught of chilling despair, Grima closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the cool stone, allowing the feelings to creep in and not fighting against them. Pushing away all the warmth, hope, and dreams of true love, he allowed his heart to be filled with malice, bitterness and coldness, never again opening up to another human.
I will as hollow as a reflection. Only the shell shall be exposed, hiding the emptiness within. An empty reflection, yes, that shall be my existence.
Tears snaked their way silently down his face as he tried desperately to harden his resolve, fighting the lamentation so desperately boiling beneath the façade, hoping to prevent such feelings from every coming to the surface again. A muffled cry escaped his pale lips as he felt hope drain away in the darkness, never to return to a burdened heart.
A tentative hand reached out and gently wiped away the tear, startling the drowning being from his inevitable dive into aching loneliness.
Opening up bleary, tear filled blue eyes, Grima gasped at the site before him. A beautiful maiden, young and fair of skin, with a crown of deep autumn scarlet and fathomless bright green eyes and lips full and pouty, was gazing on him with a look of concern.
"My Lord, why do you suffer so?" she asked gently, her finger tilting his chin up to force his eyes level with hers.
Gaining his breath he answered, "My heart is lost. It has been taken and thrown afoul."
Stroking his chin with her finger, then looping it to the side of his face to caress his cheek she asked, "And there is no way to find it once again?"
"I do not think it is possible My Lady," Grima's words were barely a whisper as silent tears trickled down his pale cheeks.
"For one to entrust their heart is no mean feat. I wonder, is the one responsible for losing your heart worthy of such a treasure?" she asked, mainly to herself, nonetheless, Grima's eyes seemed to slide into better focus as his spirits rose.
"Is a heart really a treasure?" Grima asked softly.
"It is when one has bestowed it upon another. Such a thing should not be treated lightly, but cared and nurtured with love and kindness."
Grima smiled slightly, then tipped his head, "What is your name Fair Maiden, for I do not believe I seen one such as yourself among these walls?"
"I am Carfinien," she replied showing him a bright smile. "I have come to King Theoden's court in service for thanks for the blessings he showed my family."
She blushed, a deep crimson tint touching her fair cheek. When she returned her gaze to the strange before her, she felt her breath hitch in her throat as he stared opened mouthed at her, a look of mix surprise and tenderness in his eyes.
"And may I ask, what My Lord's name?"
Grima recovered his senses to smile and said, "My name is Grima, and please do not call me a Lord."
She ducked her head coyly, her smile returning.
"I should return to my duties," she said making to get up.
Grima's hand on her arm stilled her actions. He rose from his slouched position, his body coming within a few inches of the maidens.
She stopped, her eyes wide and her heart pounding fast as his body neared. She turned dark emerald eyes on him, her hot breath blowing across his face.
"Why did you show me such kindness?" Grima asked softly.
Carfinien relaxed under his touch and answered, "You were sad and needed uplifting. Besides," she leaned closer to him, her eyes flashing playfully, "I thought you were cute."
"Cute?" Grima asked surprised.
Without knowing what he was doing, or what his body had decided on its own to do, he found his lips caressing Carfinien's as he inhaled her sweet scent. Carfinien responded by pressing more urgently against the advisor to her King, her body following along on its own accord.
Feeling a building heat in his body, Grima pulled away, surprised, stunned, excited, and partially frightened. He had never had a female engage him so forcibly, and so wanting. It sent a shiver of fear down his spine.
The fear was squashed as Carfinien panted in his ear, her hands roaming over his arms and down his chest.
Grabbing her wrists firmly, though not enough to hurt her, he beckoned, "This is not the place. Come."
Licking her lips and nodding, she allowed herself to be steered down the halls and through several arched doorways, twisting and turning and spiraling around. Her heart pounded in her chest and her breath became heavy and labored as they reached a door and she was roughly pulled inside, Grima's body automatically pressing against hers urgently.
With a wicked grin, she slammed the door shut behind them, and nipped at his lips, and pushed him roughly against his large feather bed.
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Many hours later, the shadows long and low over the land, Grima rolled over on his side, utterly exhausted, but completely sated. His body bore marks he promised to remember to cover when the dawn came, but his heart was much lighter, and more at ease with the world. He caressed Carfinien's face as she slept, her deep ginger tresses flayed about her forming a radiant autumn crown. A small smile rested on her full and slightly bruised lips and a flush colored her pale cheeks. Grima's eyes cast down her body slowly, taking in the splendid perfection, slightly marred from recent activities, and filling his heart swell up with something he could only assume was deep affection.
Perhaps the gold was naught for me, and I sought her wrongly? Is this gem what is meant for me? Do I seek what is not intended to be mine?
Frowning at the unanswerable questions, he laid his head on his pillow, watching the beautiful maiden that shared his bed. If he had more experiences with matters of love and relationships, he may have easily identified the strange feeling that gnawed in the back of his mind. Muffling a yawn, he decided to think on it when he was more awake, and slowly closed his eyes, allowing the image of the maiden at his side to shift out of focus from his weary sight, and haunt his dreams throughout the night.
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I have never written a fic for Grima before and I hope those of you who enjoy fics about him please show me mercy. I think he's a tragic character and has a lot to hide in his past. And I think even the bad guys need some lovin' every once in a while. EG They get it where they can find it… don't need any long term relationship. LOL