TITLE: With Eyes Shut

FEEDBACK: Yes ! I don't care if you hate it or love it, just send your thoughts. Don't be nice, be a critic !

DISTRIBUTION: Just ask & tell me where its going...I'll probably say yes. And if you decide not to ask, just link the thing :)

AUTHOR: never look back / bent4lifeangel@hotmail.com

SUMMARY: (Angelus POV) As James and Ms. Newman's spirits leave Angelus and Buffy's bodies in "I Only Have Eyes For You", Angelus thinks in a very confused state.

SPOILERS: Second season of Buffy, right when Buffy and Angelus are returned to their bodies in "I Only Have Eyes For You"

DISCLAIMER: I obviously don't own any of the characters listed in this story. Why would I write fan fiction when I could control people's minds on tv? All belong to the WB, Joss Whedon, etc. etc. Like everyone else says, "DON'T SUE !"

AUTHOR NOTES: Not really an emo-trigger. Just something to get me started on fanfiction...first timer :) Eh I'm not sure...was there a little too much emphasis on the kissage ? lol. Not good with romance novels, either.

It's only with eyes shut.

I can only see her in my thoughts, my head, my dreams...

I can watch her sleep, watch her laugh with her friends...

But she is truly mine,

With eyes shut.

It was a moment in pure bliss.

Before, his head had ached and his thoughts were clouded. Having no idea what the previous events were, he awakened earlier with eyes shut. He had been bounded, trapped in his own body a few moments ago, yet he knew it wasn't his soul that held him back.

A demon?

What did it matter--he was home where he belonged, and unbound in his true form once more. He could feel the spirit, or demon, or whatever it was sluggishly being lifted from his domain. There was no pain--just utter confusion. His mouth moved in accordance with the spirit's final thoughts. For a few seconds, he couldn't feel--the spirit or demon held on to whatever control left and didn't want to let go. Angelus couldn't fight it so, unsure, he let the invader's thoughts guide him as he remained standing with eyes shut.

Something's not right.

It felt like Angelus was dreaming, but every detail was vigorous. He didn't *want* to wake up, open his eyes to reality. The spirit gave him a little more freedom in his mind, more access to the activities it did in his head. As soon as he reached his own thoughts, he felt the ecstasy. His mind stunned, he was oblivious to everything except the kiss he was entangled in.

How did this happen?

With who?

Who cares!

Her lips continued to collide with his. Once he tasted her lusciousness, he left reality. Her heat penetrated his cold body, lighting the desire within him. He explored her mouth sensually, roughly at first then softly. As he plunged into the sweetness of her mouth, Angelus felt his cravings increase.

Hastily, his mouth seized hers, showing his urgency. With parted lips, he ravaged her mouth with his tongue, thrusting consistently. She gasped inside while both continued to devourer the kiss, the sound of saliva erotically mixing alive in Angelus' mind. Possessively, he slid his hand down her shoulder and to her back, pulling her tightly to his dizzied arousal. Helplessly and without reason, he gave himself away, lost in his own desire.

A sudden wave of doubt washed over him, but Angelus denied it and instead accepted her softened lips. He caught a tiny whiff of her scent and felt a familiar urge rise up inside of him.

Is it Drusilla?

No. Not Dru.

He continued to breathe her into his system, soothing the kiss. Feeling his cold, un-live body against her heated one, he caught her scent and felt her blood pounding his head. The smell intrigued him, almost provoking him into his vampiric state.

His memory was deeply faded as he continued to slip in and out of reality. Angelus came to the conclusion that it was a dream, only with tightened senses. The spirit was still around, he could feel it and the other-worldly haze it placed around him.

Suddenly, she slowly dragged her mouth away from his, leaving Angelus wanting more. His breath became husky and low as he remained standing with eyes shut, lingering in the moment. He basked in her purity and savored the heavenly taste on his lips. Drifting between a conscious of peace and delirious joy, he let his eyes rest, never wanting to wake up. Every detail he could taste, almost as if it were--


It had to be real. He felt something inside of him cry out, wanting more. In the pit of his gut, he felt his soul. Angel was lurking around but not in charge, yet Angelus could feel his joy.

No. That can't be right.

Angel was only happy in a brooding sort of way when she was around.

Oh, no.


She didn't even have to speak. He knew it was her. He knew it was real.

...it's her.