The Fourth Kiss

By Blue Topaz

Disclaimers: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are not mine, how sad.

Spoilers: 'Broca Divide', 'Point of View', 'Window of Opportunity', 'Birthright'.

Note: This is for Rosemary. Because this is all her fault. We were chatting about 'Birthright' when she suddenly putting an image into my head. And she double dog dare me and kept reminding me of that. ;) Thus, this fic. Hope you like it. And thanks to Aud who beta-read this.


Let's see.

How many times had the two of them kissed?

The first time was unforgettable.

It always was. It was your first bite on the forbidden fruit. And boy, how you love the fruit, even back then. She was the one who made the move. The kiss was fierce, forceful and ... unreal. She was infected by a virus, so she didn't really have control over her actions. But you liked it nevertheless. Who in their right mind wouldn't?

The second time was different.

Well, you were kissing a 'different' her. The one that came through the Quantum Mirror. The kiss was sweet, sad and ... surreal. It was a strange one, she was kissing you, and yet she wasn't. In her mind, she thought of you as her dead husband. Husband ... they'd been married for a year. But let's not go any further; you often get a headache just hearing the word 'Alternate Reality'.

The third time was special.

Why? Because it was from the bottom of your heart. You knew what you felt (you still do) for her and you went for it. A stolen kiss that you would not regret for the rest of your life. The kiss was passionate, demanding, toe-curling (not that you would admit it) and ... unrepeatable. Oh, and one very important point: she *reciprocated*. She had no memory of this of course, you had made sure of it (the time-loop took care of it). The kiss was meant as a closure, to let her go, to bring an end to your growing feelings towards her. But your feelings - like the rest of your team - rarely followed your orders. So, you cursed. A lot.

The fourth time was ...

... dammit, the fourth time was ...

... was ...

... it was on the tip of your tongue ...

Oh hell, who were you kidding? You couldn't remember the fourth time, but you knew that there was one. You were quite certain of it. Well, you weren't before (you dreamt about this sort of thing a lot, with quite a large number of variations as well), until you saw Teal'c kissing the Amazon leader in the Gateroom, right in front of the Stargate. Something was brought back to the surface. It was like déjà vu, only stronger. It was like a repressed memory, but different. It was like a dream, but more real. You knew it was there - you just couldn't reach it.

You tried to concentrate, but only bits and pieces of your memory reappeared. You hated pieces, you were never really a big fan of a puzzles, or jigsaws for that matter. They were such a hassle. What you knew so far is that you were kissing her, on the same spot where Teal'c and his new girlfriend did their tongue duelling. There was something in your hand, right before it happened, you were grasping it loosely, a cylindrical thingie. Could have been a staff weapon, but it was far too light to be that. Besides, why were you holding a staff weapon at a time like that? It just didn't make sense. It could have been your telescope then, but it was too small to be that too. And since when did you bring your telescope to the SGC?

You remembered her lips. Soft, gentle and welcoming. But something wasn't right. Not her lips; that part of her anatomy was *definitely* alright. What was it? She was kissing you back, of that you were sure. So, what was wrong? You felt so good, well, you *kissed* her, of course you felt good. Nothing wrong with that too, then.

You concentrated harder.

The scene changed. You were on top of her while she was sprawled on the floor -- wait, it wasn't the floor, it was the ramp. Your hands were all over her while she appeared to be doing the same.

You frowned.

Things were going too far on the ramp; clothes were getting torn, flesh was getting displayed, the groping was ...

... Okay, maybe that part was a dream after all.

Back to the task in hand. The fourth kiss.

What did you know about it so far?

  1. It did happen.

  2. It was in the Gateroom, right in front of the Stargate.

  3. You were holding something cylindrical.

  4. Something wasn't right.

  5. You could not remember it.

You looked at the list, point no. 5 was definitely not right. You will never *ever* forget something like that. But the fact remained: you did forget. Why? Did you bang your head and suffer a selective memory loss? ... nah, that sounds like something that would happen to Daniel, not you. Did some entity come and take over your body, causing damage to your brain, especially that particular part on the fourth kiss? ... nope, that was Carter's department. Did some evil Goa'uld brainwash you and then make you forget about that particular moment? ... duh, that was Teal'c. Did someone 'up there' hate you so much that they decided to torment you with this? ... now, that's what you call a plausible explanation.

If that was the case, then you should try something else. Besides, there's another road to Rome ... isn't there?

You closed your eyes and tried to relax. Maybe if you didn't push your brain too much, it would finally take pity on you, and told you what you wanted to know.

You waited ...

... and waited ...

... and still waited ...

... You hated waiting ...

... and yet you still did it ...

... because you didn't know what else to do ...

... you needed to think of a plan ...

... because the waiting was getting to you ...

... what could you do? ...

... ask Carter? ...

... but you still want to live a little bit longer, who knows, if you got lucky, and then got the fifth one, and the sixth one, maybe the seventh one as well, and so on, and so on, and so on ...

... so, back to waiting then ...

... nothing new there ...

... you got bored from waiting ...

"O'Neill, are you well?" The heavy voice of a Jaffa laced with concern, stopped your waiting. About time too; you needed the distraction. You were in the mess hall, a half-eaten pie and a now-cold cup of coffee were placed in front of you. Teal'c put a tray full of food in front of him and you wondered whether you could steal some fries from his tray. But you knew how possessive he was of his food.

"I'm OK, T. Just thinking about something," you replied a bit too early, worried that the big man would figure out what exactly was wrong with you.

"About what?" Teal'c tilted his head to one side, ready to hear whatever problems you had.

"About stuff." You tried to be vague.

But the man in front of you didn't seem to be deterred by your short answer. Instead, he waited patiently for you to elaborate further.

"Just something that I couldn't get off my mind, that's all," you reasoned, hoping that he would drop the subject. You knew that he was loyal, but between you and her, you were pretty sure that he would choose her over you. Damn Jaffa's manner.

"I see." He nodded, understanding you fully. The subject was closed.

You then spent some time talking to him about anything and everything as you tried to forget about your current dilemma. You talked about his son, Rya'c, and his mentor, Bra'tac. You talked about the rest of your team, about how Daniel once again managed to capture another innocent heart on an alien planet and about how well Carter negotiated with the Amazon women.

Speaking of her, you found yourself wondering about the fourth kiss again. You couldn't deny it any longer. You *had* to know exactly what happened, right down to the very last detail. But how?

Suddenly, a proverbial light bulb lit up on top of your head with a very loud proverbial 'ping' noise.

You excused yourself to the Jaffa and headed straight to her lab. The elevator ride seemed like forever, but you rightly blamed it on your excitement. Once it reached her floor, you practically ran to where you knew she was.

"Carter, I need your help," you said, as soon as you entered her lab, slightly panting from oxygen deprivation.

She looked up from whatever she had been doing for who knows how long and regarded you carefully. "Is there something wrong, Sir?" She was concerned; it wasn't every day you ran into her lab.

"Well, kind of, but you're right, something is wrong. Now, come on, I need your help." The desperation made you a little bit impatient.

"Was it the gate?" She always jumped to the worse conclusions.

"No, it's not. It's something else. Something important," you once again try to be vague, but maintain the urgency in your voice.

"OK, let me shut down the machine for a minute."

Nodding your approval, you watched her switching too many switches for you to count. She then took off her lab coat and threw it over her stool. After she finished, you gestured with your hand. "Come on, follow me."

She obeyed your order without further question. And that made you a little bit guilty. But you ignored the remorse; your curiosity was always the first priority. You led her to the Gateroom. You could only be grateful that both of you were senior officers, therefore no one was questioning your presence there. You were also thankful that the General was not there at that present moment.

The room was deserted; no one was there but the two of you. You looked up to the control room and smiled. There was not much activity there as well. It was perfect.

"Colonel?" Her confusion was clear for anyone to see.

However, you ignored her. You put your hands on her shoulders and guided her slowly to *the* spot.

"Stay there, and don't move," you ordered. You were hoping by recreating the event, you could remember it better.

She looked at you oddly, but did what you said anyway. You placed yourself right in front of her, just one step away. You looked straight into her eyes, hoping that you could find something there. The giant ring was right behind the two of you and something flashed in your mind. A vision.

Your right hand flew to her cheek, stroking it gently with your thumb.

You followed the gesture. She was startled by your action, but you couldn't stop. You knew that you were getting close.

"Stay still," you told her, softly.

Her eyes wandered wildly around the room and when she realised that no one was looking at them, she relaxed, a bit. And then a pair of piercing blue eyes were staring right back at you.

"What are you doing?" She whispered with a touch of panic in her voice.

"What are you doing?" She looked at you incredulously, but she made no move to remove your hand from her face.

You ignored her and take a step forward. Your body was barely touching hers. You felt something in your left hand, something round. You dropped whatever it was and your left hand mimicked your right one, resting on her other cheek. With her face cupped by your hand, you closed your eyes and ...

"Sir!" Her warning brought you back to the present. You found yourself imitating your vision, and that had put the two of you in a very compromising position. She pushed you away and removed your hands from her face slowly. You were about to protest when you realised that she was hiding something.

"You know," you accused her.

She avoided your eyes. "I don't know what you are talking about," she lied. You knew that she lied.

"Don't make me say it out loud, Carter," you warned her.

She sighed before she lifted her head to meet your searching glare. "Okay, so I know. Am I supposed to forget about such a thing?"

You shook you head. "No, but why can't I remember? It just doesn't make sense."

She pursed her lips closer together, no doubt thinking about how to tell you the reason why.

You arched your eyebrow, a silent plea for her to tell you the truth.

"You were drunk," she finally said.

Drunk? That should explain about the lack of the memory.

"When?" You asked. You wanted to know every single little detail that there was to know about the event.

"Last Christmas," she answered.

Last Christmas ... the SGC were having a party, you were there. You drank some punch from the refreshment table, that was all. It shouldn't have affected you like that.

"The punch was spiked," as if reading your mind, she explained. "With weird stuff."

Ah. You shrugged your shoulders slightly, that seems possible. Because you remembered waking up with the worse headache that you had ever encountered. You weren't sure how you got into your quarters, but you guessed that your team mates took care of that.

"Does anyone else know?" you asked, just to be sure.

You spot a pink shade on her cheeks.

"Teal'c was there," she supplied a piece of new information. "Daniel was out cold, he drank some of the punch too. But Teal'c and I stayed with the fruit juice."

Huh? T was there?

"How?" you asked the question instinctively.

"You were drunk, Sir." A smile decorated her face.

You returned the smile, despite the absurdity of the situation. But then your smile turned into a deep scowl. "Why didn't you tell me about this earlier?"

She was taken aback by your irritation. "And say what? 'Hey Sir, remember last night? You know, when we were in front of the Stargate and kissed each other silly'?" She replied bitterly.

You conceded; she had a very good point. But ... "Silly?"

"Well, that's one way to put it." She shifted uncomfortably on her feet.

"Tell me everything about it," you asked her carefully, making sure that she didn't see it as an order.

She took a deep breath. "Well, you got ... tipsy, then you said something about cleaning the Gateroom, and then you were ordering us around. Before we knew it, you, Teal'c and I were in here, holding a broom each. It was deserted, most of the personnel were at the party ..."

Broom? That should explain the cylindrical thingie that you were holding.

"... then you insisted on us sweeping the room, you said that we should be ready just in case Thor came to visit us. You made it an order ..."

Thor? That was right; you invited him to come over for some Christmas festivity. He didn't show up though.

"... and then, and then you made a move ..." She seemed resigned.

You were suddenly all ears.

"... Teal'c and I tried to take you to your quarters, but you said that you would do it only if I did something for you ..."

Yes, go on.

"... I asked 'What?' and then you dragged me in front of the Stargate, then, then, well, you know the rest." She refused to say further.

"I don't know the rest. That's why I'm asking you." You couldn't resist teasing her.

She wore a pained expression; clearly she didn't believe your last statement. "It's something that I don't have words for."

"Oh well, if you don't have the words for it, then maybe you could show it," you suggested, lightly.

You almost smirked from the shocked look on her face.

"You ... you ... you..." she stammered, lost for words. Unconsciously, she stepped back.

You put on a smug look. You felt like a wolf that had just cornered its prey.

And then, without a warning, she retaliated. "Okay, I'll show you."

Suddenly, the prey became the hunter. Never in your lifetime would you have expected her to say that. But then you realised something - she was bluffing. She knew that you were having fun at her expense and she never took that sort of treatment lying down. It wasn't in her nature; she was a fighter, not a victim.

Thus, your current predicament. Should you call her bluff and go for it? Or should you just back away and say you were sorry?

"By all means." You knew that there was no way that you would miss this chance.

Hey, she *offered* it. You couldn't not say 'yes, please'.

Besides, you were desperate to know what the fourth time was like.

She gauged you for a minute, looking for any indication that you would back out. But you were not that much of a fool. She then took a look about the surroundings. No one was paying any attention to them. She squared her shoulders and stepped forward, standing at her previous position. She was ready for a fight.

You thought that she was being over the top, it was *just* a kiss. But you shouldn't be the one who said it, that *just* a kiss had been bothering you for quite some time.

She took both of your hands and placed them on her cheeks, like they were before she stopped you. Naturally, you admired the smoothness of her skin against your palms. And then, like a moth drawn to the fire, you bent forward and leaned closer towards her. Yours and her eyes fluttered shut as your lips descended onto --

"Sir?" She whispered right on your lips half-heartedly. You made no reply and just went on. As soon as you touched the soft flesh, you were lost. Everything seemed to disappear and all that mattered were you and the woman in front of you. You could hear her whimper by the intensity of the kiss and it sent vibes throughout your body. You liked it, and you wanted to hear more. You pushed your hands up further so that they were embedded in her hair and pulled her closer, crushing her lips with more force.

And as soon as it was started, it was over. Or maybe your brain was just short-circuited because of sensation overload.

She pulled away first, slightly dazed by the after effect. She then disentangled your hands from her hair and put them by your sides. Clearing her throat, she told you with a croaked voice, "And that's what happened, Sir." With a ghost of smile on her face, she continued, "You passed out straight after that."

And then she turned around and walked away while you just stood there in front of the giant portal with a conceited smile on your face. You made no move to stop her. You got what you wanted.

"I'll take care of the security camera." You heard her say before she exited the room.

You looked back to your list:

  1. It did happen – check.

  2. It was in the Gateroom, right in front of the Stargate – check.

  3. You were holding something cylindrical – it was the broom, check.

  4. Something wasn't right – Teal'c was there, check.

  5. You could not remember it – you were drunk, check.

Now you knew what the fourth time was like.

It was exactly like the fifth one.

*The End*

Any reviews or feedback are greatly appreciated.