Disclaimer: I disclaim 'em

Author's note: This is a song fic set during Episode 24 to "Bottom of a Bottle" by Smile Empty Soul.

WARNING: contains spoilers.

Sleeper

Been scared and lonely.

I tell myself there's something wrong with you

But you all told me I need some time alone to deal with issues

Why was I woken up? Why the hell couldn't they just leave me asleep? Ignorant and happy. No. Instead I woke up to a desolate, god-forsaken earth that's nothing like my  earth. My home. Gone forever. I woke up cold and alone in a world I not longer recognize. Why…?  God damn you, WHY?

An the other sleepers… All gone. Tony…I liked him. He was my friend and I killed him. He wanted to destroy us all. I trusted him. I wanted to be like him. Aren't I? Am I really any better than him? I carry the same B-cells. What makes me any better? Why shouldn't I just be exterminated for the good of the human race like Tony…Like Alicia. Oh, Alicia, I'm so sorry. You were just a little girl and I killed you. Now I weep alone. Tony…Alicia…everyone all gone..

But something makes me carry on

It's difficult to understand what I always wanna find

I do for the drugs

I do it just to feel like flying

I do it for the love that I get at the bottom of the bottle

I fought. I fought with everything that was in me to rid the earth of the Blue. I killed thousands. I flung myself into it, mind, body and soul. Nothing would get in my way. I hurt people. I hurt my friends. I hurt Marlene. But I didn't care. It was like a drug. The gruesome high I got off it was almost enough to make me forget my misery. Covered in the blood of my enemy, watching Tony fight… I felt invincible. I needed it…I craved it. I had to get my earth back. Then everything would be ok. Then I could be happy again. 

You always call me and ask me

And how I make it through the day

I'm always falling

Guess it just God's way of making me better

But something makes me carry on

It's difficult to understand what I always wanna find

I do for the drugs

I do it just to feel like flying

I do it for the love that I get at the bottom of a bottle

And I.. I wonder why I try

And I … I wonder why I bother

And I.. I wonder why I cry

I… I got through all this trouble

Can't I just…die? I feel hopeless and deserted. And then Marlene. Oh, she makes me remember what hope is. She makes me want to struggle to live. Because when I'm with her her, I want to live. I want to exist with her for an eternity. No battles, no war, no Blue, no B-cells…just Marlene. As I gave her hope when we were stranded on Earth, she gives me hope now. She give me the strength to seek and discover what I am.

"I'll always be with you." she tells me. And suddenly I think I can live. I think that everything that we have gone through has made me strong enough for her. Her touch makes me burn with the will to live. And I will live. I will live to make love to her again. And we will be happy. I fling myself into her… into discovering what I am and what my purpose is. Together.

But something makes me carry on

It's difficult to understand what I always wanna find

I do for the drugs

I do it just to feel like flying

I do it for the love that I get at the bottom of a bottle