Summary: Buffy is pregnant with Spike's child, while the World's End is coming. But the Nyazian Scrolls have still some secrets that would change everything...
Rating: PG-13 (maybe R or even NC-17 later in the story)
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of Buffy – The Vampire Slayer and ANGEL, only Joss Whedon, The WB, UPN and FOX do so.
Spoiler: BTVS: After Season 6 and some main events of Season 7; ATS: after Season 3 and 4.01
Author Notes: This story begins during the BTVS episode SEEING RED (before the bathroom incident, I have to stretch and twist the time between this incident and the happenings the evening before in the Magic Box a little) and the ANGEL episode TOMORROW. The episodes after SEEING RED happened in my alternative universe like they had happened in the show.
SMASHED: Buffy and Spike are punching each other. SPIKE: Looks like I'm not as toothless as you thought, sweetheart. BUFFY: How? SPIKE: You came back wrong. SPIKE: I'm in love with you. BUFFY: You're in love with pain. Buffy is throwing Spike against the wall. Buffy's kissing Spike. The building falling apart while Spike and Buffy do their thing up against the wall.
TARA: Willow, you are using too much magic. What do you want me to do, just ... sit back and keep my mouth shut? WILLOW: Are you saying you're gonna leave me? Willow crying. Tara is packing her stuff.
GONE: MS. KROGER: I'm Doris Kroger, from Social Services...My interest is in Dawn's welfare. And the stability of her home life, something I'm just not convinced that an unemployed young woman like yourself can provide.
DEAD THINGS: After having "fun" Spike and Buffy lying in Spike's crypt. SPIKE: Do you trust me? BUFFY: Never.
EPIPHANY: Angel throws Darla through the glass doors. Angel and Darla on the bed kissing and ripping each other's clothes off. ANGEL: "You know I would never do that." Angel wakes beside Darla and jerks upright in bed. ANGEL: "Get dressed and get out, because the next time I see you I will have to kill you."
OFFSPRING: DARLA: "Hello, lover." ANGEL: "Darla? This is impossible." DARLA: "Tell me about it - Daddy." CORDY: "You slept with her?" Angel holds Darla and raises the stake. DARLA: "Come on! Do it! Do it! Do it!" ANGEL: "The child. It has a soul." DARLA: "No it doesn't..." ANGEL: "It does. It does."
ANGEL: "The Tro-clon - the prophecy - raised up from darkness to bring darkness. That's you. Holtz, whatever brought you here..."
LULLABY: WES: "It's human." ANGEL: "I'm gonna have a son." TRANSLATOR: "The prophet is telling us: There will be no birth only death." DARLA: "This Child, it's the one good thing we ever did together. You make sure to tell him that." Darla stakes herself and explodes into a cloud of dust, leaving a crying baby boy behind.
Pale she sat on the white blanket in that white, sterile room her arms crossed hugging herself. Her whole body shook, but not with the cold surrounding her, just with expectation and fear – just with what will come. Her eyes never left the bare ground under her feet. She wasn't able to look up – to meet his gaze. What he was right? – Her whole life would change only in that short moment they say he's right.
Only one hour before all seemed to be so normal. She had never expected what should happen when she arrived at the gym at the Magic Box. After patrolling she came back to the shop to train. She was alone; Anya had closed the Magic Box early that night maybe she couldn't bear being in the same room where she and Spike had let themselves go that night before. Thus the only noise, which was heard, was the sound of Buffy's fists throwing against the punching bag, trying to push aside her thoughts about her ex-boyfriend. How could he! The beats filled the room and echoed back by the huge brick walls around her. It wasn't the first time she trained late at night to let out all her frustration and anger. Buffy knew Dawn was save at home watching a movie with Tara and Willow. Months ago she had never left her little sister alone at home with Willow, not after that car accident. But persons change. And Willow changed a lot. She tried a long time proving the Scoobies she won't do any spells again – and after a long and rocky path her friends begun to trust her. Even Tara seemed to give her and their relationship a new chance.
Suddenly she felt the presence of another person, a familiar presence. "Spike!" Buffy muttered stopping her training. "What do you want?" She didn't turn to face him; she just stood there looking into the space before her. How could he dare coming to her after what he did?
"We need to talk, luv." Spike answered out of the shadows near the door to the shop.
"Stop calling me this! And we don't need to! Go! Just go!" replied Buffy while Spike arrived behind her back. His hands moved slowly around her waist, his lips to her soft neck. When he kissed her she started struggling, she tried to escape his caress, his feelings for her. "Let go off me!" called Buffy, but her face said more, a part of her wanted him, back at her side, being held by his strong arms. - The other part was angry and felt betrayed. About his sleeping with Anya. How could he say he loves her more than anything in the world and betrays her the next moment with one of her friends?
"I'm sorry, Buffy. I really am… But I needed you to know that." His strong hands stroked over her shoulders his light blue eyes showing his deep regret.
"Why?" His words sounded real and his apology seemed to come from deep inside his heart. Somehow a part of her wanted to believe, wanted to have him back.
"Because I care about you. I know you feel something for me . . . Saw it in your eyes yesterday . . . the pain."
"Then you might want to try the not sleeping with my friends." Her voice was calm like a whisper yet emphasis tingled in her words.
"That's not... I didn't go to Anya for that. I was looking for a spell." He tried to justify himself and to calm her down. Making her understand that nothing was planned, it just happened. It was so stupid of him.
"You were going to use a spell on me?" Anger rose in her. Buffy shoved one of his hands off her shoulder in disgust.
"It wasn't for you. I wanted something . . . anything to make this feeling stop. I just wanted it to stop . . ." His voice became softer when he continued "I love you so much . . . I'm so sorry. I didn't want to hurt you." He felt his words had no effect on her. What else should he do? "You should have let him kill me." That was the only thing he could think of. He couldn't bear to see her in pain, pain he had caused.
"I couldn't." Her response was honestly and she still stood there with his grip on her, not moving a millimetre. Why can't it be like before? When she could come to him with all her sorrows and forget them in his loving embrace. She knew she had feelings for him.
The vampire began kissing up her neck "I'm sorry, pet" he whispered nibbling her ear.
With every of his hot kisses Buffy's desire grew. She couldn't resist his caress; resist her own feelings – not anymore. She wanted it like it was before; wanted to feel him. Quickly she turned around, facing him, his adoring gaze. Buffy saw the burning fire in his wonderful blue eyes, the fire of desire and passion. She looped her arms around his neck pulling down his head into a passionate kiss. Her tongue forced its way into his mouth dancing with his.
Quietly Spike's fingers passed over her back, under her shirt. His hands stroked her warm skin. She trembled with excitement under his touch. Abruptly he dropped her body down on the floor with his own on the top, still kissing her. While his lips caressed her cheek his hands glided down, deeper, in direction of the zipper of her jeans. When Buffy moaned of pleasure he slid gently over her stomach, his cold skin directly on hers.
Suddenly Spike stopped his propose, breaking the kiss pulling his head some inches up. He didn't move any muscle, just looked down on his Slayer. But his blue eyes didn't realise her, his stony gaze went through her face. After a long beat he glided hastily down. "W – What's . . .?" asked Buffy confused watching the vampire laying his ear on top of her naked abdomen. Some moments went by before he lifted his head meeting her perplexed stare. Spike's eyes reflected panic and horrible shock "Bloody Hell. – Yo – You're pregnant!" he mumbled frowning. "What!" screamed Buffy unbelievable, sitting upright. "You're pregnant!" he repeated his voice trembling with anger.
"No! T – That can't be! Why do yo-"she stammered her eyes widened by terror.
"There's another heartbeat in your stomach. I heard the faint sound of it – clearly." Spike interrupted her troubled, his hand still resting on her middle.
"No! I'm not. That's impossible." angry and with disbelieve she punched him and threw him some metres away from her. Quickly the Slayer jumped to her feet, attacking Spike verbally. "Do you fool me? You're lying! What do ye want? What for a stupid plan is this? Coming here and saying I'm pregnant!" She took a step in front of his body watching his reaction. He stood up slowly to his feet rubbing his shoulder. "I'm not lying! You're bloody pregnant! . . . When did ye have your last period?" Spike raised a brow waiting for her respond.
After a long thoughtful moment Buffy's confused expression on his question yielded to a shocked one. "Oh God! Nooo!" she whispered realizing the truth. Tears began to spring to her eyes and made their way down her pale cheeks. Buffy's legs became weak and she collapsed, her body dropped down to her knees. "But that's impossible! How can that be?" she sobbed raising her helpless gaze to his.
"Seems I'm not the only one you shagged, Slayer. Blaming me for sleeping with Anya and yourself betrayed me the same way!" Spike stepped angrily beside her. There was no softness and caress in his features – not anymore. His face was cold and filled with hate.
"That's not true! You were the only one I had sex since I'm back!" she explained wiping tears away.
"Oh please! Who wanna fool whom, Slayer? Vampires can't make babies! And you know that!"
"You're the only one. There were no others! . . . So I can't be pregnant. You're wrong!" Buffy stood up meeting his gaze.
"C'mon! Who's the bloke! Was it GI Joe? – Or was it more than one? And you don't know who the father is?" Hurt by his words Buffy slapped into his face. "No further word! – That's enough! I said the truth!" she yelled still weeping.
Spike began going around in the gym thinking about the situation. Suddenly he stopped and giggled. "'K. Ye really think you're not pregnant. – Then let's go to the hospital! Let's see what the doc'll say!"
Buffy just stood there in the middle of the room not believing any word he'd said but with a little spot deep, very deep within her that he could be right. Maybe. – It was true. Her last period was long ago – she can't remember when she had it. At that time she thought it would be irregular because of all the stress and sorrow about Dawn, her job . . . her entire live. And now she stood there had no idea what to do, just tried stopping to weep.
"What's going on? The doc can say who's right! When you're not pregnant – all's OK!" Spike approached next to her shoulder still annoyed seeing her traumatised expression. "C'mon, Buff!" His hand touched her shoulder turning her to meet his face, his rough look. Slowly after a moment she nodded and started moving towards the door.
The ER at Sunnydale Hospital was relatively quiet this time of night. He leaned against the white wall his gaze still resting on her back. The smell of fresh blood and disinfecting penetrated into his nose – he didn't like this combination. They waited for more than twenty minutes for the doctor and he was restless. Where does this bloody slaughter stay?
Buffy was eaten up by waiting. Her thoughts ran over her only hope he's wrong. For the second time in her life, since she had found the dead body of her mum, she prayed to God or to any other power she doesn't believe in. She wished this all is a really bad nightmare and she would wake up every minute in her warm comfy bed.
There was the sound of shoes coming down the corridor nearing them. Spike's sensitive ears notice the noise immediately and he pushed himself away from the wall. When the door opened Buffy frightened and looked up on the middle age man and the nurse who entered the room.
"Hello, Ms. Summers. I'm Dr. Ross." The doctor shook her cold hand and his gaze met the blond man approaching them. "OK. Then please lay down."
Buffy followed his instruction and stared fearfully on the sonogram. The screen showed black areas with a great grey spot. "Congratulation! You're three months pregnant. Your child seems to be healthy, but we have to . . ."Buffy felt the world drop out under her feet. She didn't hear any further word; it was like she sat in a big bubble just hearing some voices whisper unintelligible. Her mind turned only around one thing: pregnant. Unbelievable and traumatized she watched on the screen, watched the grey form and the one spot within it that went lighter and darker: her child's heart.
Bloody Hell! She lied! The bitch lied! . . . Three months . . . On the one hand Spike's anger grew. He had trusted her, loved her. But she betrayed him, deceived him. And now she denies it and still lies with the evidence in front of her very eyes. On the other hand he wished he wasn't right, wished everything would be like before. But the rage overcame him. Spike turned on his heel and hurried out of the room, out of the hospital – out of the Slayer's life. Nobody before had hurt him so deep – not even Dru.
Irritated Dr. Ross watched the man leaving. After a moment he turned his attention to his horrified patient. Her eyes near tears stared still on the sonogram. She hadn't moved any muscle since he had admitted the news. "Are you OK?" he asked worried touching her hand.
With the sudden touch Buffy was thrown back into reality. "This is an unplanned pregnancy? Right!" the doctor helped Buffy to sit up. Slowly she answered his question with a nod. She wasn't able to speak, to bring any word over her lips. "It's not too late for an abortion." He said quietly. Buffy looked around her moving her head. "Your boyfriend had left." was the Slayer informed. After a long beat she mumbled, her voice rough: "He isn't my boyfriend . . . H – He isn't the father." she decided pulling down her shirt over her stomach. "Oh – . . . You need to start your prenatal care, Ms. Summers. Here. This is the address of Dr. Carter. She is an excellent doctor and works very close with our hospital." He wrote the address on a little piece of paper and gave it to Buffy. "I can give you the number of Doris Kroger, she works for Social Services. She can also help you with the baby . . . if you don't wanna rise it."
"Doris Kroger! – No! . . . I mean I don't need Social Services." The only thing at the moment Buffy wanted was going home. "Can I go home now?" asked Buffy weakly hoping for her release from this horrible place. "Of course. It's late now."
Once she approached her house her steps became smaller and her breath faster. Please let them sleep. I haven't the strength to talk to anyone. Slowly Buffy opened the door very silently. There wasn't any light in the whole house and the Slayer went carefully up the stairs through the darkness. She crept down the corridor along Willow's and Dawn's rooms and slipped into her own one. Tired she kicked off her shoes and fell down on her bed. Tears forced their way out of her eyes down her cheeks. "Why!" she sobbed hugging one of her pillows. The pain, the confusion, the new situation – the complete evening – all this. It was too much for her. She only wanted to cry and never stop.