Released and revived
Author: Gothic Spook
Rating: G
Key words: DRF & DRR
Category: Post-ep/ slight romance
Summery: John does some thinking after the hug on the beach, he then asks Monica a question.
Disclaimer: If you recognise it, I do not own it!
Spoilers: Release and a little of Audrey Pauley
Archive: Anywhere that wants it, just let me know
Authors note: Release is one of my favourite x files episodes. I think that they did a wonderful job in exploring John's guilt, but in my opinion this is what should have happened after the hug
Dedication: To all Dripper fans out there : )
Monica was leaning against Johns truck waiting patiently for him. She understands that this is a special moment for him, its a moment when is guilt can finally be released and he will be able to move on with his life. Free from the demons that had haunted him for so long. When he had asked her to come with him, she knew that he would want to talk. She had told him she would wait by the car for him, he didn't object, he understood what she was thinking. That this was his time, his and Barbara's to say good-bye to their son. In the distance, John climbs the sand dunes towards her. Monica saw him coming, turns and goes to meet him halfway. John reaches the top and waits for Monica, who stops in front of him. She can see the demons leaving him at this very moment. She can see the guilt being washed away with the tide below.

They look into each others eyes. John wraps his arms around her and buries his face in her hair, sharing his grief with her. Monica holds on to him as John continues to cling to her. John doesn't know why Monica has always been there for him, giving him everything she has and him giving almost nothing in return. She was always there to help with a case, she came to DC to work with him. She didn't ask questions she came on his word. She was there to offer all she could whether it was advice on a case, time to listen or as small as giving him one her her bright smiles to raise the mood. No matter how far away he kept her as hard as he tried to keep her at arms lengths, no matter how hard he tried to deny his feelings for her, she was always there. They eventually broke apart and stood there facing each other. Neither of them sure what to say.

Ready to go? Monica asked John.

He said and they both got in the truck.

Monica in the drivers seat and John in the passengers. The drive back to Monica's apartment was quiet. Monica had decided not to leave John alone tonight and so decided whether he agrees or not that he was going to spend the night at hers. Neither of them said a word as they walked into Monica's apartment and sat down on the couch.

John suddenly asked. Monica looked at him confused.

Why what?

Why have you always been there for me? He looked into her eyes.

She felt as though he was looking straight through her into her soul. He looked at there joined hands and laced their fingers together.

I don't really know ... I guess I saw something inside of you ... Something special that had to be set free and I wanted to be there when it was, She told him. He knew what she meant but he needed to hear it from her.

You mean all those qualities you said in our cat people and dog people conversation?

That and more.

He looked into her eyes and saw that she loved him, she was suprised that she saw the same love in his eyes. He moved his head closer to hers and before she knew what was happening John had his lips on hers, warm, loving lips. They wrapped their arms around each other and deepened the kiss. John pulled back for a second to look into her eyes.

I love you so much it scares the hell out of me. Those qualities that you told me I had, the thing is I wouldn't be any of those things if you weren't in my life, you saved me after Luke and you continue to save me. I'm sorry I kept you at arms length, I'm sorry I never let you in as much as I wanted you to be, but from now on I promise I'm going to make it up to you. He told her.

I love you too.