Saruman's Tale

Saruman is super cute

Although he looks a bit like poop

He takes a bath, then does some math

And then he goes to sleep.

Saruman is friends with an Eye

Although it sometimes makes him cry

It forces him to do a bunch of stuff

Making Saruman's hair look like fluff.

Then Saruman got really mad

He then decided to go all bad

He betrayed his friend, the big, great Eye

And then he made the Uruk-Hai.

They're super stupid, the Uruk-Hai

But to make them requires a lot of pie

It doesn't take too much to rouse them

And Saruman made about ten thousand.

Then Saruman made them go to war

Which in their opinion is a real bore

Three hundred to ten thousand was the score

But the Uruks lost and are now no more.

Ents then came to Saruman's place

The oldest beings of every race

They tore down the walls and released the river

Just the sight of it made Saruman quiver.

Then Saruman got really scared

And in all this time didn't wash his hair!

He hid in his room, and locked the door

Until the days passed had accounted to four.

It was on that day that Gandalf came

His hair he had finally seemed to tame

He called on Sharky who then came out

After his extremely long pout.

But Gandalf did not come to comfort him

His tidings were actually quite grim

He told him he'd have to give up his keys

Or else his place would be assaulted by trees.

But Saruman's will could not be bent

Even by a threat from Ents

He wouldn't give up his place

It was the only one that fit his taste.

Then Gandalf reluctantly broke Saruman's staff

Saruman's last bit of power was broken at last

He then retreated back to his tower

Without a single bit of power.

Saruman left and wandered far

He really wished he had a car

He finally reached the land of the Shire

Where he would unleash his final fire.

When the hobbits returned from their long quest

They found they would not have time to rest

Saruman had the Shire in his control

With his new found minions on patrol.

The hobbits then reached Bag End

Where they met Sharky and his friend

The entire place they had de-faced

And turned into their temporary base.

But Saruman's friend had had enough

Of taking care of Saruman's stuff

He took out a knife and slit Saruman's throat

The skies then Saruman's spirit smote.

So did Saruman take his final breath

His evil purposes ended finally in death

His vile designs had at last failed

And so ends the sad story, Saruman's Tale.

           A\N: I do NOT really think Saruman is "Super Cute"