Chapter 43: The Huntress

Every beat of Hasufel's hooves on the ground was like a knife twisting into her fragile heart. The grassy earth disappeared beneath them as Kaitlyn rode the chestnut stallion in the opposite direction from Harrowdale ; the place where her friends and the love of her life had ridden away into the night.

At times it was difficult to breathe. Her heart hurt, her chest hurt as if someone were squeezing it. Tears blurred her vision and she was grateful that the stallion followed the other horses and not her navigation. She did not think she could find her way out of a paper bag right now.

After watching Legolas, Gimli and Aragorn ride away, a large part of her had become broken. She had felt panic. There was still so much she had to learn about this world. How was she to live without them and without him? Especially with how much she loved him? How was she to survive in this strange world without her friends?

She was on her own once again.

Her lack of riding skills were deplorable. It set her apart from the other women she rode to Edoras with. These women of the high court had grown up riding and were graceful and at one with their horses. Kaitlyn rode clumsily, bouncing in the saddle with no real sense of balance.

Just as the women left Kaitlyn to herself on the way to Harrowdale, they did the same on the return to Edoras. Kaitlyn had not felt this alone since she had been taken from her world. She was grateful for Hasufel. Tending to the stallion on the journey to Edoras kept her sane and focused on returning safely.

Kaitlyn returned to Ammora's home where she was welcomed warmly. The best gift the older woman could have given her was having a bath drawn up after two days of riding. She soaked in her room until the hot water grew cold. She attempted to drown her loneliness as her tears disappeared in the bath water.

Ammora listened sadly in the main house as the younger woman's soft sobs reached her ears. She did not have the heart to disturb her to let her know that dinner was ready.

Kaitlyn went to bed that night without eating. The soft bed had beckoned and she had answered its call.

For three days she picked at food like a bird and did not leave the house.

She did not realize how difficult it would be staying in the room she had recovered in. She was unprepared for the flood of memories that assaulted her everywhere she looked. She and Legolas had spent a great deal of time here. Yet, she did not leave her room often.

As she moved her eggs around on her plate on the 4th morning, Ammora stood by the scarred old wooden table and put her hands on her hips.

"If that Elf were here, he would not allow you to wallow."

Kaitlyn raised her head and looked at the older woman.

" I will not allow it either. I am sorry that you are no longer with your friends, but it is time to move on with life. It is what they would want you to do."

Kaitlyn's mouth opened in surprise. Ammora's tone had always been soft and gentle. Right now her tone was steely and her stance was rigid.

"You will eat and find something to do with yourself outside this house so that when he returns you will be in the right frame of mind. Do you understand?" the older woman's tone was stern.

"Ye-yes Ma'am" Kaitlyn nodded and she began to eat.

Ammora's words were exactly what she needed to hear. She had allowed her grief to make a prisoner of her for several days. She could not let depression rule her life. That had nearly happened once before and she had beat it and moved on. She would beat it a second time.

There was a heavy feeling in the air within the capital city. Though the sun was often shining, with it being summer, the world felt cold and dark. Most of the women were without their husbands or sons because they had ridden with the King for Gondor. Only those men too old or injured and boys too young remained.

Everyone tried to get back to their daily lives. Kaitlyn struggled because she did not have a daily life to get back to. Her life had been in so much upheaval since she had arrived in Middle Earth. There had been so much travel, lessons and battles that it felt odd to be staying in the quiet of the same place day after day. The peace and solitude was unsettling.

She missed Legolas more than she could have ever imagined. She missed speaking Elvish with him, learning more and more of his language and about him and his people. She missed the feel of him against her, his hands always in her hair, his mouth pressed against hers or the feel of his heartbeat. She missed watching him. The plethora of emotions that appeared on his face in different situations.

Her dreams were filled with the Mirkwood Elf. Sometimes they were good dreams, snippets of their time together. She would hear him tell her in Sindarin how she had his heart and his love. Other times they were nightmares of him being killed or hurt in battle. She often awakened, drenched in sweat, reaching for Legolas blindly, wondering why he was not with her. Then she would fully awaken and realize he was far from Edoras riding to war and she was alone.

Kaitlyn wished that Lady Eowyn had ridden back with her so that she had her company. When the king's niece had not been found, the women in camp realized in disbelief that she had gone to war.

After Ammora had jolted her out of her pity party, Kaitlyn jumped into any task that was needed. She often helped Ammora prepare vegetables, wash laundry and bandages. She had never stopped to realize that the older woman was a healer. It made sense why Kaitlyn had been brought to her after Helm's Deep. Kaitlyn often came home in the evening before dinner to find Ammora was out visiting an injured or sick person. Kaitlyn would get a fire going and haul water from the well to prepare for dinner.

Other than Ammora, most of the other women did not converse with her. They kept largely to themselves and their work. The few women and children she had befriended at Helm's Deep were from the Westfold and they had returned home.

With all of the time on her hands, Kaitlyn realized just how much she missed her world. She missed her parents and the long talks with them on the phone, talking about her day at the bank, or what had been on the news or a new movie coming out. She missed Sunday dinners at their house. She missed rock music. She missed the freedom to drive her car where she wanted. She missed hot showers and more comfortable clothing. She wished that she could call her mother and tell her about Legolas. She wanted to tell Mom and Papa how much she loved him and their story of how they fell in love.

Did anyone at home know that she was missing? Did they think Derrick had done something to her? It broke her heart to think that her family and friends were worried about her. And then she remembered that Gandalf had said she was from a different time and place. Did time pass differently and her family didn't even realize that she was gone? Or had she been missing for decades? She did her best to push thoughts of home away, though it was not easy .

Her whole life had been spent in America and in upstate New York. She came from a world where technology constantly improved and most people lived and worked in peace without war. Middle Earth in comparison felt crude and rudimentary. Everyday tasks such as bathing, cooking and traveling took much more effort. Despite the large differences, this was her new home and a life with Legolas after the war was her desired future. She needed to continue to adapt or she would never survive.

She awoke early, and made her way to the stables every morning, no matter the weather and fed and groomed Hasufel. The chestnut stallion thrived despite the fact that most of the other horses were gone.

They went for rides along the open land, but never too far from the fenced walls of Edoras. It took many long days to improve her riding skills so that she no longer bounced or was unbalanced in the saddle. She still had many of the bruises to prove it. Soon she could sit his thundering gallop as if she had been riding for years.

She brushed Hasufel while he ate. The same young boy from before they left for Harrowdale, had taught her how to put the saddle on the stallion's back, how to put the bit in his mouth and bridle on his face. She practiced this each day until it was second nature.

The young boy, not much older than seven, never spoke any instructions and would never tell her his name when she asked. She wondered if he did not speak the common tongue.

She could tell that Hasufel was eager to ride, with how he pranced like a parade horse in his saddle each and every time they rode. She wondered if knew the other horses were at war. Perhaps he was anxious to be left behind just as she was.

She rode him every day. Those hours of pounding hooves and wind in her hair took her mind off her aching heart. She missed Legolas and hoped that he was alright. She hoped they were all alright. Her fingers often strayed to the blond braided necklace made from the Elf's hair. She touched it more often than she liked to admit.

The days turned into weeks. There was no word of what was going on in Gondor or anywhere else in Middle Earth. Kaitlyn felt as if Edoras were cut off from the rest of the world. It was torture not knowing. The people did their normal chores although there was always a fear of something evil happening. Would they be attacked? Who would defend the city with all the men gone?

As the weeks went on, Kaitlyn grew more confident with her riding and she and Hasufel ventured further from the walls of Edoras. She started to gather any wood or items that could be used at the capital so that she felt her rides were useful and not just an escape.

In the afternoon she helped Ammora. When the older woman mentioned the meat supply in the city was dwindling, Kaitlyn surprised herself by offering to hunt. With not many men around, the woman shouldered all the responsibility and duties as did the young boys. The children prowled the rivers closest to the city to bring back fish and set snares to catch rabbits and small game. They all grew tired of bread and fish and the occasional chicken that was slaughtered when it stopped laying eggs. Meat became scarce. She had the beautiful bow from Legolas and it was a shame to let it collect dust in her room.

She did not know the first thing about hunting, but she figured that as she had learned to ride, she could learn to hunt. She began to practice archery again. Her wounds were nearly healed. After a few days' time, she got used to the discomfort from drawing back the string on the bow, and eventually she did not notice it at all. She would close her eyes and hear Legolas in her mind telling her how to stand, how many fingers to use to hold back the arrow. At first she did not hit any of the targets, but each day she improved. By the end of just three days she was hitting the targets consistently. Many times young boys and girls would watch her practice. Occasionally some of the women or old men would watch too.

After several days practicing on the ground, she tried to learn how to shoot from Hasufel's back. She failed time and time again. She could not seem to balance herself and the weapon at the same time that her horse moved. She began to wonder if offering to hunt had been a bad decision.

One day while she was dismounted and Hasufel was having a drink from the river, several deer approached. They had come to drink and they must not have seen or smelled her in the tall grass where she sat.

She carefully crawled to her bow and put an arrow to the string.

"Close your eyes and feel at one with the bow" She heard Legolas in her head. She felt the memory of his body surrounding hers, his hands covered her hand, showing her how to position the arrow. She let the arrow loose without thought and heard the thump of a body hit the ground. The deer bounded off toward the mountains.

She stood up and there on the ground was the body of the deer she hit. Her arrow went straight through its skull. It was a healthy and rather large doe. Unable to put such a heavy body onto her horse, she used a rope to drag it carefully back to Edoras. The women made short work of hanging and preparing the meat for later. They saved the skin and fur for clothing and bones for other items.

Many days later, she awoke to find a new pair of deerskin riding boots beside her bed. Ammora told her they were a gift from some of the women.

In the days after her successful hunt, more women acknowledged her presence and some even thanked her in the common tongue. Small horses carved of bone were left at Ammora's home for her. Soon she had a collection of them along her window sill.

The young boys showed her how to make snares to trap rabbits and other small animals. She could ride much farther than they could walk. Game was more plentiful closer to the forests. She set traps and checked them while out riding. She hunted large game whenever there were deer during her rides. Though she missed hitting many, she started to bring meat back on a regular basis. Sometimes it was rabbits or squirrels and small birds, other times she got lucky and killed a deer. Any meat was shared with all in Edoras. It was made into soups, stews and roasts.

On one of her return trips with several rabbits, the young boy from the stable waited for her. This was nothing out of the ordinary except that this time he spoke to her in the common tongue.

"We are to celebrate the life and death of a great woman tonight."

"Has someone perished?" Kaitlyn asked with a frown. She was too worried about who died to realize the boy had never spoken to her before.

"The old lady Hannrin died today. We are to bury her tonight and have a feast to celebrate her life."

Kaitlyn frowned and her hands stilled from undoing the buckles and leather of Hasufel's saddle.

"I know of Hannrin. I helped her give out food on our journey to Helm's Deep. "

"We will celebrate her life tonight."

"Thank you for telling me." She resumed unsaddling her horse but then stopped and turned toward the boy.

"I did not think you could speak the common tongue. You've never spoken to me before. I don't even know your name."

The boy flushed red and kicked at some hay. He hid his eyes behind his long blond hair. "I was afraid," he admitted.

"Afraid of me?" she asked incredulously

"Aye. I have never met a woman who can ride like the wind and hunt like a man. Or one who kept the company of a dwarf, an elf and hobbits. I heard you even fought at Helm's Deep!" He exclaimed in wonder. "Women cook and clean. They mend clothes and have babies."

Kaitlyn nearly snorted. " Well, not this woman. And not Lady Eowyn either. She rode off into battle with the men. What is your name?"

"Ramma son of Rammos," he told her proudly.

She stepped closer to the boy and knelt in the hay so she was not so tall and imposing.

"Ramma, I must tell you that I am nothing special. I have struggled with just about everything in this world and failed at many things. I am not as special as you think I am."

" But you are! I have seen you return with deer, rabbit, squirrel and fish!" he exclaimed.

Kaitlyn gave him a lopsided grin. "Honestly, hunting is the very first thing I have been good at. Riding has taken much practice as did relearning how to use my bow."

"Aye, you did not know how to put Hasufel's saddle and bridle on! Even so, you learned to ride and you have kept nearly all of Edoras fed!"

Kaitlyn flushed with embarrassment. "Where I come from most people don't ride horses. We have other transportation. I'm very grateful you taught me. And I'm happy to find food. Many from Edoras and the Westfold have taken care of me and my friends. I want to repay their kindness"

"I like to help others, too."

Ramma looked down and used his boot to kick at the hay again.

"I lost my parents in this war. Several people have been looking after me and helping me too . My father was an excellent horseman and you needed to learn to saddle your horse. I was happy to help."

Kaitlyn frowned. Sadness filled her. She feared what else this war would take away.

"I'm sorry about your parents," she told him honestly.

"Me too. I miss them terribly, especially my Da. He was the stable master and was always here in the barn. I feel closer to him being here."

Kaitlyn's heart ached for this boy. He couldn't be more than six or seven.

"I lost my parents too," she blurted without thinking.

"You did? So you are an orphan like I am "

Kaitlyn sighed deeply. "I guess I am ."

"The women of the court are jealous of you." He blurted, not giving her time to think more about her parents. "They spread lies but the rest of us do not believe them. Healer Ammora tells of how brave and kind you are. We see that with our own eyes."

Kaitlyn resumed untacking her horse

"I shall have to thank Ammora for speaking well of my character."

Kaitlyn frowned. She realized she was starting to speak like the people here in this world. She had been on Middle Earth for over six months now.

"Is it true that you speak Elvish?" Ramma asked. Now that the boy had started speaking he did not stop.

"Yes, I can speak much of the language, although I'm still learning."

"See, you are far from ordinary, my lady. You ride like the wind, you hunt and you speak Elvish."

Kaitlyn smiled.

The Golden Hall was opened up in remembrance of Hannrin. Kaitlyn provided much of the meat and Ammora and several women would not allow her to help prepare the meal. A bath was drawn for Kaitlyn in Lady Eowyn's room, where she had once stayed. There was a large tub not being used and it seemed a shame to let it go unused.

After dressing and braiding her hair, she stepped in front of a mirror and hardly recognized herself. She had lost weight but had gained muscle over the last few months. Her skin was tanned from long hours in the sun. Her long dark brown hair was braided down her back to her waist. She wore her green tunic and cape from Lorien and deerskin leggings and boots. Her elvish dagger was attached at her waist. She wore Legolas' old bow over her shoulder along with the quiver from Haldir. She looked nothing like her former self.

Suddenly, this woman from another realm realized that she had some sort of purpose. She had a reason to rise each day. She was no longer existing, she was living by helping to provide food for the people that had once done the same for her and her friends. She felt proud of herself. Instead of wallowing in self pity at not being able to travel with her friends and the love of her life, she helped the people of Edoras and herself.

The feast had brought out hope and lighter moods. Many women and several older men had greeted Kaitlyn the night of the feast. Children had sat beside her hoping she would talk about her companions or the battle of Helm's Deep. She had told them an abbreviated version of her first trip to Edoras and of the elves in Lothlorien.

Several times throughout the evening people greeted her with the title 'Huntress'. That surprised her. It was what many of the children and their mothers called her. After all, she was the one who hunted for the majority of the food.

Kaitlyn was honored by the title.

For the first time in a long while, she did not have any nightmares.

"They say that you come from a land that no one on Middle Earth has ever known."

Kaitlyn looked up at Ammora as they folded laundry the next afternoon. She was lost in her thoughts and still basking in the glow of being more accepted. Ammora was normally quiet as they worked but today she had thoughts and questions.

Kaityln wondered who 'they' were. Most certainly the women of the high court. Kaitlyn got along with most of the lower class, since hunting and providing food, they had become more friendly. But the women of the high court still largely ignored her and did not speak the common tongue in her presence. It was another reason why she loved to ride her horse. There were no wagging tongues in a language she did not understand as she rode. While the poorer women were kind to her, the woman of the court still gossiped behind her back.

"It's true. The land I come from is not easily reached from here. How I came here is a mystery. The purpose for my coming is a mystery. "

"I would think your purpose was obvious," Ammora told her while folding a large bandage. "I've heard the tales from your own lips last night of how you left the caves and bravely saved Isildur's heir at Helm's Deep. I've tended to your wounds myself so I know them to be true. "

Kaitlyn blushed. "I think what I did was more foolish than brave. It's not my nature to fight or kill. I just wanted to warn Aragorn that he was being targeted."

"No matter your intention, you saved the man."

"Yes, I guess I did."

"For someone who does not enjoy killing, you have done a remarkable job bringing back meat. Huntress."

Kaitlyn basked at Ammora's use of her new title. "I certainly was not expecting to be honored with that title."

"You have become a champion to our people. You have brought us hope." Ammora told her with a bright smile.

Kaitlyn returned her smile and she finished folding a piece of dark colored fabric.

"I feel as if I've not thanked you enough for what you have done, Ammora. You helped me heal and you opened your home to me, fed and clothed me. You gave me a stern talking to when I needed it, so that I'd snap out of my depression when I came back without my friends. Even now you make sure I have a meal, clean clothing and a bath." And apparently the older woman also stood up for her when others gossiped. "Thank you."

Ammora blushed. "You thanked me in the beginning and you thank me with your presence now. T'was my pleasure to help you when Lady Eowyn asked me. Just as you thrust yourself into riding that great red stallion and hunting for us to take your mind off your elf, helping you did the same for me."

Kaitlyn startled and her hand automatically reached for the blond Elvish braid beneath her tunic. Ammora did not seem to notice as she kept on speaking and working.

"I do not comprehend your obsession with keeping so clean or some of the sayings you use and their meanings but they are what make you so dear to me. They are a part of who you are "

"Thank you, Kaitlyn chuckled. "I think."

Ammora smiled and shook out a piece of fabric before she spoke again. This time her tone was somber.

"I lost my husband, just before you came. He gave his life trying to protect Prince Theodred." She stopped folding and looked at Kaitlyn with tears in her eyes.

"I'm sorry, Ammora. I had no idea."

The older woman wiped a tear that escaped from her eyes. "We had lost our son just months before. He too died in battle and made us proud. I had been alone until you arrived. When you came, I too had a purpose. I am a very minor healer. With all the men and boys hurt at Helm's Deep I have been needed. And the extra men, women and children from the Westfold arrived with you and needed places to stay until they went home. It brought me great joy to help them."

"This war has taken so much from all of us, hasn't it?" Kaitlyn asked. She thought of Ramma's loss of his parents. Of King Theoden who lost his son. Of Boromir who died protecting Merry and Pippin. She realized she would never know the full extent of the lives lost.

Ammora nodded. "I hope that it does not claim the life of your Elf or your friends."

Kaitlyn let out a deep breath. She wished for the same. While she was carving out a life for herself in Rohan, she ultimately wanted to be reunited with her friends and with Legolas.

She flushed bright red. 'Her Elf' Ammora had called him. She and Legolas had not been very discreet with their feelings for each other while they had been at Edoras. She now wondered if some of the rumors mentioned anything about her relationship with the Elf.

"You have no reason to be embarrassed. I thought the pairing was strange, an Eldar and a mortal woman, but thought, good for you, lass! He is strong and handsome and I have heard his skills with a bow are unmatched. He is no doubt a good protector. I had never seen an Elf or a Dwarf until they came to see you. Same with hobbits. Our ancestors traded with them. I had never seen them with my own eyes." The older woman rambled on.

"I miss them terribly," Kaitlyn admitted softly.

"I do not doubt that. You were always with them, especially the Elf. You were both inseparable and I am sorry you are parted from him. Are you and he married?"

Kaitlyn placed a folded piece of laundry on the stack and shook her head. " We're pledged I guess you could say, but not married." she blurted before she could stop herself.

Ammora beamed. "We must have a wedding when they return. Let us focus on hope and happy thoughts for one afternoon."

Kaitlyn smiled, the first real smile, she'd smiled in a long while. What harm would it be to dream about marriage to Legolas for just an afternoon?

The happiness did not last long.