No. Escaflowne not mine.

~*~*~*~

Lullaby

v I

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You said, "Sir…?"

And he said, "Shh…"

And you never uttered another sound after that, not even when you came, hard, pressed into the thin mattress of your dorm bed, pillow suffocating your breathing. Not even when he dug his fatal fingers into your bare shoulders as he emptied himself into you…

He had that power over you. With one word, he could reduce you to ashes, your flame burnt out. The other commanders always had something to say about you, but you never cared, because they didn't hold your life in their hands every night. They never said words that sent icicles crawling up your spine, even as his body ironically warmed yours under the thin coverlets. Words that you'd repeat every night after he's gone, singing yourself into restless slumber.

He was your lullaby from the very first day you locked eyes with him. Crimson reflected on mahogany, blood staining slate. He became the first and last thing you saw behind your eyes every day after that, encouraging life. In this frightening world filled with nothing but haunting shadows, you found him, and you believed it was fate. You could hold on to him… You could trust him… You could… love… him…

You were a fool. He used you, and you did nothing to stop him. He owned you, body and soul, and you submitted to his demands. You'd stare at your back sometimes, staring at those little red crescents fading to white. The scars may fade, but they never healed… Never…

You tried to build a wall, but it crumbled with one touch. You tried to stay away, but could not endure the loneliness. The years stretched by, and it dawned on you, that yearning never leads to getting, only giving, giving, and more giving…

So you snapped, both your mind and his neck. Crack. It was music to your ears…

The lullaby was complete…

~*~*~*~

You aren't surprised to find yourself here, looking down on them from the other side. Once upon a time, you were there, standing alongside them, waiting… for orders and insults and broken promises. They look so much like you. So much… Their eyes shine with admiration and respect and… trust…

The memories of forgotten yesterday return. You can still feel his hands on your shoulders, sliding down your naked back. You shudder, suddenly cold. You can't bear to see them fall. Can't bear to see them lost.

So you take them under your wing, shield them from him, and those like him. Better you, and not him – the man that made you, the man that broke you…

He'll say, "Sir…?"

And you'll say, "Shh…"

And the lullaby rewrites itself…

~*~*~*~

Aoi Akiko rambles:

If you haven't guessed, this was written by Dilandau, for Dilandau.

*shudders* I know, it's... disturbing...
The idea struck me in the head (not unlike the headboard this morning) on my last day of mid-semester break (why, oh *why* do ideas always come a *day* before I restart my semester...?!?!), and I had no choice but to appease my sadist muse before I got out of bed (*purr* which I must say is a very comfortable place to be *snuggles*). It's short, I know. So whack me over the head already...
*blink* Er... don't take that literally... I'm still recovering from that bruise made by the headboard...

Oh, and if you're asking if his 'commander' referred to Folken, I'd send Dilly-chan himself to kill you. How on *earth* could you make me want my Folken-sama abuse my Dilly-chan like that...?! And Dilly-chan gets to kill him in the middle of the fic...!!
So, NO, it isn't Folken. Who is it...? I haven't a clue... That's how sadist muses work - they strike you with inspiration, but lack great details...

*blink* Um... review...?

~ Aoi Akiko