"Hey Johnny" I said aloud. I almost burst out crying but I couldn't. I had to keep it in.

"2 years" I said, laying the rose on his grave. I couldn't believe it had been that long. It felt like yesterday

"I think of you everyday Johnny and I hope" I paused trying to hold back the tears, "I hope you're happy where you are"

"I miss you" I whispered and then left. I headed back to the house. Darry would've hit the roof if he knew I was out here alone.  It was hard enough being there but being there with someone else was even worse. I couldn't talk to Johnny if I knew anyone besides him and God could hear me.

Things had change, not dramatically, since Johnny and Dally died. Maybe Darry was more patient with me but there was something inside me that had changed. I couldn't feel my heart anymore. That sounds weird but it was like nothing was there, I couldn't feel anything. Of course I'm not talking about the beating, if that stopped I'd be with Mom and Dad and Johnny but I'm talking about not being about the feel anything. Not getting excited or scared or feeling any emotions.

Soda said he noticed a change in me too. "You never smile anymore Pony" he said, "I wanna see you smile". I'd just grin and go to my room and study. There was nothing much I could do. I had found some new friends from school. Boys that didn't know Johnny or Dally well and didn't ask me questions. I stopped hanging out with the gang as much. It wasn't the same without Johnny and everyone from the gang reminded me of him. I didn't think I'd ever find a friend like Johnny until I met Mark.