"And now, back to the story," the wonderfully talented, good-looking, kind intellectual, and smart narrator states.

"No, Silly Willy Billy Shrilly Karilly!" Jack teases. "You've never met a Mary Sue, have you?" Will shakes his pretty little head, and the audience sits on the edge of their seats, waiting to see how long his hairspray can hold. "Mary Sues are dangerous creatures. They entrap their victims with their large breasts and flowing hair. Much like your lass Elizabeth." At the mention of Elizabeth's name, almost like it was supposed the happen this way, the doorbell rings. "Since when did we get a doorbell on this ship?" Jack hisses. "Willy Pooh! It's me Elizabeth! Come get the door! I've brought some lovely friends for Jack to meet!" "Ahoy Elizabeth!" Will screams as he walks to the door. Suddenly, the door flies open and hundreds (well, not hundreds, maybe three) of Elizabeth look- alikes enter. "Jacky! Where are you?" They scream in their shrill seductive voices. "Will," Elizabeth utters, "I'd like you to meet my new friends. The Mary S-- -, Uh. the girls are only here for a little bit, but." "Why are they only here for a little bit?" Will inquires. "Well, Sherry Hoo gets killed off in Chapter Seven, Kerry Foo falls in love with Jack's illegitimate love child, and Cherry Woo, product of an R-rated fanfic, murders herself when she finds out Jack fancies you." "Eh poppet? Jack fancies me? What the devil are you talking about?" "Oh don't be such a worrywart Will. It's just a story!" "Oh. Eh, so you're looking for Jack huh? Last I saw he was explaining to a brandy bottle what a Mary Sue is. Strange man that Jack be." "What? What do you mean Mary Sue? Who did he say was a Mary Sue? I'm not a Mary Sue! I love you Will!" "What the." But Will doesn't argue, considering Elizabeth was halfway out of her corset before he said anything. Meanwhile, back in the cabin, Jack almost finishes explaining to the bottle, and ironically, when he is about to tell the bottle what they sound like, a Mary Sue screams; "I think I found him! He's mine, all mine!" "Ahh! Mary Sue's! Heeeelp me Will!" Jack screams like a little girl. "Save my boots! They're Prada!"