This is my second fic. Yay for me! This was just something that came to me
all of a sudden. Maybe it was when the club hit me in the head? Anyway,
this is just saying that Love Hina doesn't belong to me (it belongs to Ken
Akamatsu) and the concept of Jay and Silent Bob belong to Kevin Smith.
Enjoy!
Haruka was doing her normal thing. She stood idly in front of her store sweeping, admiring the beautiful day that was soon to be. Or should've been.
"Yo lunchbox, this fucking sucks. That bitch said she'd be here and that she'd fucking blow us. And where the fuck is she? She's probably in fucking Jersey, fucking blowing two other fucks."
Silent Bob did nothing but nod his head in agreement.
Haruka immediately knew trouble was clear on its way.
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Kanagawa!
"Damn, man, and I fuckin' wasted my time to learn fucking Jap (Please don't take this as an offense to Japanese) language." Jay was clearly pissed off. But, what could he do? He didn't bring any money with him and he doesn't even know what the fuck credit cards are. So, our stoner duo appeared to be stuck in Kanagawa prefecture for quite some time. All he had was his weed to get high on. Maybe he could sell it? Of course, he's gonna sell it. He's a dealer and that's what he does with his heterosexual life mate, Silent Bob. More like Silent Bob Who Occasionally Talks. But that's too long of a name so we'll keep it at Silent Bob.
Silent Bob nudged at Jay, who was trying to mack it with some fine Asian chicks.
"What the fuck do you want, lunchbox?"
Silent Bob, being brighter than his brain dead fellow, pointed toward the Hinata Café where Haruka was currently sweeping.
"What man, they ain't selling no snacks there. It's a fuckin' café. You know, where haiku writing motherfuckers like to go."
Silent Bob didn't listen to a word Jay said. He knew that he'd say something like that and went his way towards the café. Jay reluctantly followed his tubby friend.
"Hey, man, this wall feels just right. Like the Quick Stop," Jay told Silent Bob, who in turn nodded his head in agreement.
Keitaro, Naru, and Motoko (along with Tama-chan) were currently in the café when they noticed our stoner duo.
"What are those two doing standing right there?" Naru asked, worry clear in her voice.
"Don't worry Naru. They're just relaxing in their own way," Keitaro replied.
"I sense certain malevolence from them," Motoko stated in her usual pensive tone.
Haruka knew they weren't going to calm down unless someone approached the two loiters. And so she did.
"Can I help you?" she asked, her cigarette still in her mouth.
Now the gears of Jay's brain slowly turned. A hot Asian chick was asking to help him. That obviously means.
"Shit yeah. You could blow me."
Haruka didn't know how to react. She had never met anyone like this before. All she did was give them a strange look and left them alone.
"Yeah, bitches love me." Jay said matter-of-factly.
Silent Bob just acknowledged the fact that his buddy was retarded.
Motoko and Naru were still a little nervous about them and so Keitaro tried to calm them down.
"You don't need to worry about them. They'll probably be leaving soon."
Three weeks later
One of the usual Hinata café customers (a woman) left to return home after a nice chat with Haruka over a nice cup of tea. She passed by two suspicious individuals.
"Yo baby, ever had your asshole licked by a fat man in an overcoat?!"
She started walking a bit faster.
"Shit yeah lunchbox. All we gots to do is sell the rest of our weed and we can be back in fucking Jersey. So where the fuck is it?" Jay asked.
Silent Bob did his gesture of 'I don't fucking have it.'
"Then where the fuck is it bitch?"
That's when they saw a turtle. A hot-springs turtle. A flying hot-springs turtle. A flying hot-springs turtle with all their weed!
"Hey, you fucking squirrel!! Give me my shit back!!"
Thus, the chase began. First, through the café. Then, onward through Kanagawa. For a while Jay and Silent Bob lost Tama-chan and decided to stop some movie about them (Who would pay to see that?). After that, they found Tama-chan again and resumed the hunt back to Kanagawa.
"Lunchbox, do somethin'!!!"
Silent Bob looked at Jay, trying to say through his eyes 'What the fuck am I supposed to do about a flying turtle!?'
All at once the chase ended. Why? Because Tama-chan just ate the weed.
Conveniently, they were right out in front of Hinata Inn.
"Is something wrong, sirs?"
The stoner duo looked down and saw Keitaro with Tama-chan on his shoulder.
"Is that your fucking turtle!?"
"Uh, yeah."
"He just fucking ate the only damn thing I had left that could've fuckin' gotten me back to fuckin' Jersey! Now, you've got to get me back there bitch!"
Keitaro was worried. No, more like shittin' in his pants. Here were two Americans, threatening to do something to him for something he doesn't even know about.
"W-W-Wait, h-hold on. Look, why don't you just stay here for a while a-and we can work something out."
"You better do somethin' about it, or my manservant will have to fuck you up like Perkaset."
"Let me just show you your rooms for now and we'll discuss this later."
And so our stoner duo stays at Hinata Inn thanks to Tama-chan, who shortly after, returned the weed that she had actually just hid in her shell.
That's it for now. If you kind people would send me some reviews I might just keep writing. Even flames will be accepted due to the fact that I live in South Florida and there's nothing you people can send that's hotter than the temperature right now. For the most part, a lot of this stuff I just implemented from the 'Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back' but I promise to add my own stuff in the later chapters. R+R Please!
Haruka was doing her normal thing. She stood idly in front of her store sweeping, admiring the beautiful day that was soon to be. Or should've been.
"Yo lunchbox, this fucking sucks. That bitch said she'd be here and that she'd fucking blow us. And where the fuck is she? She's probably in fucking Jersey, fucking blowing two other fucks."
Silent Bob did nothing but nod his head in agreement.
Haruka immediately knew trouble was clear on its way.
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Kanagawa!
"Damn, man, and I fuckin' wasted my time to learn fucking Jap (Please don't take this as an offense to Japanese) language." Jay was clearly pissed off. But, what could he do? He didn't bring any money with him and he doesn't even know what the fuck credit cards are. So, our stoner duo appeared to be stuck in Kanagawa prefecture for quite some time. All he had was his weed to get high on. Maybe he could sell it? Of course, he's gonna sell it. He's a dealer and that's what he does with his heterosexual life mate, Silent Bob. More like Silent Bob Who Occasionally Talks. But that's too long of a name so we'll keep it at Silent Bob.
Silent Bob nudged at Jay, who was trying to mack it with some fine Asian chicks.
"What the fuck do you want, lunchbox?"
Silent Bob, being brighter than his brain dead fellow, pointed toward the Hinata Café where Haruka was currently sweeping.
"What man, they ain't selling no snacks there. It's a fuckin' café. You know, where haiku writing motherfuckers like to go."
Silent Bob didn't listen to a word Jay said. He knew that he'd say something like that and went his way towards the café. Jay reluctantly followed his tubby friend.
"Hey, man, this wall feels just right. Like the Quick Stop," Jay told Silent Bob, who in turn nodded his head in agreement.
Keitaro, Naru, and Motoko (along with Tama-chan) were currently in the café when they noticed our stoner duo.
"What are those two doing standing right there?" Naru asked, worry clear in her voice.
"Don't worry Naru. They're just relaxing in their own way," Keitaro replied.
"I sense certain malevolence from them," Motoko stated in her usual pensive tone.
Haruka knew they weren't going to calm down unless someone approached the two loiters. And so she did.
"Can I help you?" she asked, her cigarette still in her mouth.
Now the gears of Jay's brain slowly turned. A hot Asian chick was asking to help him. That obviously means.
"Shit yeah. You could blow me."
Haruka didn't know how to react. She had never met anyone like this before. All she did was give them a strange look and left them alone.
"Yeah, bitches love me." Jay said matter-of-factly.
Silent Bob just acknowledged the fact that his buddy was retarded.
Motoko and Naru were still a little nervous about them and so Keitaro tried to calm them down.
"You don't need to worry about them. They'll probably be leaving soon."
Three weeks later
One of the usual Hinata café customers (a woman) left to return home after a nice chat with Haruka over a nice cup of tea. She passed by two suspicious individuals.
"Yo baby, ever had your asshole licked by a fat man in an overcoat?!"
She started walking a bit faster.
"Shit yeah lunchbox. All we gots to do is sell the rest of our weed and we can be back in fucking Jersey. So where the fuck is it?" Jay asked.
Silent Bob did his gesture of 'I don't fucking have it.'
"Then where the fuck is it bitch?"
That's when they saw a turtle. A hot-springs turtle. A flying hot-springs turtle. A flying hot-springs turtle with all their weed!
"Hey, you fucking squirrel!! Give me my shit back!!"
Thus, the chase began. First, through the café. Then, onward through Kanagawa. For a while Jay and Silent Bob lost Tama-chan and decided to stop some movie about them (Who would pay to see that?). After that, they found Tama-chan again and resumed the hunt back to Kanagawa.
"Lunchbox, do somethin'!!!"
Silent Bob looked at Jay, trying to say through his eyes 'What the fuck am I supposed to do about a flying turtle!?'
All at once the chase ended. Why? Because Tama-chan just ate the weed.
Conveniently, they were right out in front of Hinata Inn.
"Is something wrong, sirs?"
The stoner duo looked down and saw Keitaro with Tama-chan on his shoulder.
"Is that your fucking turtle!?"
"Uh, yeah."
"He just fucking ate the only damn thing I had left that could've fuckin' gotten me back to fuckin' Jersey! Now, you've got to get me back there bitch!"
Keitaro was worried. No, more like shittin' in his pants. Here were two Americans, threatening to do something to him for something he doesn't even know about.
"W-W-Wait, h-hold on. Look, why don't you just stay here for a while a-and we can work something out."
"You better do somethin' about it, or my manservant will have to fuck you up like Perkaset."
"Let me just show you your rooms for now and we'll discuss this later."
And so our stoner duo stays at Hinata Inn thanks to Tama-chan, who shortly after, returned the weed that she had actually just hid in her shell.
That's it for now. If you kind people would send me some reviews I might just keep writing. Even flames will be accepted due to the fact that I live in South Florida and there's nothing you people can send that's hotter than the temperature right now. For the most part, a lot of this stuff I just implemented from the 'Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back' but I promise to add my own stuff in the later chapters. R+R Please!