Title: Divine Interruption (1/6)

Author: Cyclone

Feedback: Please be gentle.

Distribution: Gimme credit and a link. Plus, archived at http://fanfiction.net/profile.php?userid=62966 or http://fanfiction.net/~cyclone

Rating: I'm gonna go say PG.

Spoilers: Up to season two of Buffy and anything in the Herc/Xenaverse.

Disclaimer: The characters depicted herein belong to other people. I'm just borrowing them for a while.

Summary: Xander gets some "help" from a goddess. Sequel to Reminiscence.

Author's Note: I _was_ planning on skipping to the Judge story arc, but...

* * *

Xander unlocked his front door and entered his home. They had just finished dealing with Spike, Dru, and the Tarakan assassins, and he was looking forward to a good night's...

He froze.

_Someone_ was humming. Cheerfully.

His parents were never cheerful.

"Who's there?" he called tentatively as he entered the kitchen.

"Oh, hey!" the scantily-clad woman gushed as she turned, munching on a peanut butter sandwich. "How've you been, Curly? It's been, what, two thousand years now?"

Xander blinked, "Aphrodite? What are you doing here?"

"Just thought I'd stop by, see how you were doing," the goddess of love said, reaching out and ruffling his hair. "And give you some help with your love life."

Ignoring the annoyance and the growing look of trepidation on his face, she shook her head in disgust, "Man, what _is_ it with you and princesses, huh? Xena, Dirce, Niobe, Nebula, Nautica-..."

"Hey, that wasn't me!" Xander protested.

'Dite just shot him a _Look_. "_Whatever_. Where was I? Oh, yeah. Nautica, Ampata, and now this Cordelia girl? You've got some serious issues, kid." She smiled, "But I like you, and Hercie likes you, so I'm gonna give you a hand."

With that pronouncement, she vanished.

Xander stood there, stunned, then murmured, "I've got a baaad feeling about this..."

"I heard that!" came 'Dite's disembodied voice.


Xander clutched his stinging cheek and hung his head, "Oh, yeah. I'm in trouble."

* * *

The next morning, 'Dite was dragging her son by the ear.

"C'mon, Cupie, I said I'd help him, so you'd better not miss!"

"But _Mom_!" Cupid said. "She _already_ loves him, and we agreed not to meddle anymore, remember?"

"So what?" 'Dite waved it off blithely. "This is just a personal little favor. I just want to show the guy how much she cares about him."

"No!" Cupid said, putting his proverbial foot down. "I won't do it!"

"Fine," 'Dite said, her voice just a touch away from a growl. "Then I _will_!"

She snatched his bow.


* * *

Author's Note:

Okay, hands up, anyone who actually thinks this will turn out well.

That's what I thought.

Anyway, back to the 'fic...

* * *

Xander had managed to put aside his worry about just _what_ 'Dite was planning on doing.

For the most part, anyway.

So it was that he was in the library when _it_ happened.

Someone started nibbling on his ear.

He turned slowly. "K-Kendra?" he asked timidly. "What are you doing? I thought you were, ah, heading back?"

"I jest thought I'd... stay around for a while. Get to know dis town and de Hellmouth a little better."

* * *

"Oh, rats!" 'Dite huffed. "Missed!"

With an aggravated sigh, she drew her son's bow again.

* * *

Buffy frowned at Kendra's actions. This was not at _all_ like the taciturn Slayer, though, Buffy admitted, she didn't really known the Caribbean girl that well.

The blonde Slayer shot Willow a sympathetic look.

*Mmm, Willow's pretty hot,* Buffy thought. Then blinked. *Where did _that_ come from?!*

* * *

"Oops," 'Dite muttered. "Damn it, how do you aim this stupid thing?!"

* * *

Willow was doing her best to look anywhere but at Xander and the amorous Slayer.

*Why, Xander?* she wondered, pouting. *What _is_ it with you and Slayers?*

Her gaze rested on Giles, and she suddenly smiled.

Was it getting warm in here, or was it just her?

* * *

"Argh!" 'Dite cried out. "All right, just one more try."

* * *

Giles shook his head. What was going through that girl's head? Was Buffy's influence that profound?

Perhaps... he froze and felt his cheeks burn.

*Stop it, Rupert!* he scolded himself. *She's just a _child_! A _Slayer_, no less!*

* * *

"Okay, that's it!" 'Dite threw the bow down. "I give up!"

"Does that mean you'll untie me now, Mom?" Cupid asked irritably from his rather uncomfortable position on the ground.

* * *

Author's Postscript:

Who needs a messed up love spell when you've got Aphrodite? ;-p

Now, if I can just figure out what I'm going to _do_ with this plotline, I might actually be able to write the next part...