Mary-Sue Comes to Hogwarts

Chapter 1~ New Arrival

Every year, Harry Potter looked forward to returning to Hogwarts, seeing his friends, playing Quidditch, and the beginning of the year feast in the Great Hall. This was the first time that he had not spent his summer in anticipation of the school year. The Dursleys had been better than usual with the Order's threats hanging over their heads, but most of all Harry wasn't sure he wanted to be around the wizarding world. It was easier not to think about Sirius when constant reminders didn't surround him. And although Ron and Hermione were careful not to mention his late godfather, he could tell by Hermione's pitying glances and Ron's discomfort that he was on their minds as well.

Harry sighed and sunk into his seat at Gryffindor table. He looked around- the tables were full of students, but less full than they had been last year. Voldemort had indeed returned. And although he usually was consoled by Dumbledore's appearance, he had somehow lost faith in the magical ability of the headmaster to "fix everything." He watched with feigned interest during the sorting.

But glancing up at the Great Hall table, Harry gasped when he saw a familiar, if drawn face. Professor Lupin caught his eyes and waved, and Harry waved back slowly.

"Look," whispered Hermione. "Lupin's back!"

And at that moment, Dumbledore stood up and began to give his opening speech.

"Students of Hogwarts, I welcome you back for another year. This year is more solemn than our previous years have been- Voldemort-" a shudder ran across the room as almost every student flinched- "is back among us, and many of our fellows are no longer here. But the school year shall proceed as normal, and I hope that every student will put aside his or her differences to unite against the peril that surrounds us. On a lighter note, Professor Umbridge will no longer be among us-" a cheer rang through the Great Hall, only Argus Filch and a number of Slytherins did not join in. Even Professor McGonagall let out a loud whoop. Dumbledore's eyes twinkled. "-and in her place as Defense teacher will be Professor Lupin."

This time, the cheer was quiet and came almost solely from Gryffindor. Many students looked pale with shock, and Malfoy crossed his arms and muttered something to the effect of "My father will never allow this. ." Harry laughed dryly, knowing Lucius Malfoy had recently broken out of Azkaban and was on the run from the Ministry, so would have no say in the matter. Dumbledore resumed his speech.

"I also have the pleasure to announce that among our new students this year will be a new exchange student from America. I know we've never had an exchange student before, but this year we decided what the heck? Why not? Unfortunately, she doesn't seem to be here-"

Suddenly, the doors to the great hall slammed open, and everyone in the Great Hall gasped. It was the most beautiful girl anyone had ever seen. She had skin of sun-kissed ivory, eyes of passionate jade, and hair of shimmering raven. The Hall was filled with her scent of fragrant night- blossom, her robes were of the finest hazy-winter sky colored silk, and in her long, slender ivory fingertips was a broom of shimmering silver.

"Oh, hello, everyone," she said in a voice like a thousand nightingales. Dumbledore smiled warmly, and said, "May I present our new American exchange student, Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford?" Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford smiled humbly and bowed. Everyone continued staring, awestruck by her beauty reminiscent of a warm spring day. Finally, the silence was broken by someone who said, "Cool broom!"

"Why thank you!" said Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford. "It's the new Silverbolt 3000, the fastest broom in the world. I designed it when all of the players on the Silver Arrows came down with a case of the measles. I also nursed them back to health." She laughed, and her laugh sounded like a thousand tinkling silver bells. "Anyways, sorry I'm late. I had to stop on my way to save Sirius from his untimely death."

Sirius stepped into the Great Hall and waved. "Yo." He was currently topless except for a dog collar, but was wearing tight boy-band leather pants and a mischievous smirk. A bunch of people screamed. "It's Sirius Black!"

Mary laughed her laugh like flowing caramel again. "Oh, don't worry, I also discovered proof of his innocence, and showed it too Cornelius. We go way back, and he owed me a favor from that time I saved him from a rampaging manticore."

Everyone sighed in relief. Dumbledore beamed. "Well done, Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford. Seeing as Sirius is here, why don't we make him Transfiguration Teacher?"

"Score," said Sirius with his perpetual bad-boy smirk. He dashed up to the head table and sat next to Remus, bumping Snape out of the way onto the floor. McGonagall opened her mouth to protest.

"Don't worry, Minerva," said Dumbledore. "You're still head of Gryffindor, and you can be Potions master now. Snape, how about you be. . .um. . .Filch's assistant!"

"What!" demanded Snape angrily.

"Sorry, Severus," said Dumbledore, "but we do need to make room for Sirius for plot purposes. Run along now!"

Everyone waved merrily as Snape stormed out of the hall.

"So, Sirius," said Dumbledore, "since we no longer have a Slytherin Head of House, can you take over despite your horrible bias against them?"

"No problem!" said Sirius with a wickeder grin than usual.

"Now, let's sort our new exchange student, shall we?" Said Dumbledore brightly. Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford trounced up happily to the Sorting hat with a grace befitting a swan. She pulled the hat over her curls of abundant obsidian. She wasn't there for long, when the hat suddenly shrieked.

"I've never seen anything like it! She has qualities that surpass those of all four founders! Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford, it is beyond my skill to sort you. How about you just join every house and choose from day to day."

"Okay," said Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford with her voice of bubbling glacial waters. Then, with her lioness-like grace, she trounced over to the Gryffindor table and sat down in between Harry and Ron, shoving Hermione out of the way. Instantly, Harry and Ron got into a fistfight over who was allowed the pass her the sweet potatoes.

"You can't pass her the delicious potatoes, Harry! Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford is my one true love!"

"No, Ron, you bloody git! She's my one true love! I'll kill you!"

Both took out their wands and begin fighting madly. Suddenly, they froze. Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford had performed the Impedimenta Curse without even taking out her burnished chestnut veela hair wand.

"Boys," she said in her voice of wavering moonbeams, "how can I be your true love if you don't even know anything about me?"

Harry and Ron sat up eagerly, hard to do under the Impedimenta Curse. "Tell us! Tell us!"

"Um, okay," said Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford as softly as a newborn kitten. "Well, I was raised in a cottage in the woods by Skippy and Sparky de Smytheford, my adoptive house-elf parents. All my life I thought I was merely an over-grown and freakishly beautiful house-elf with paranormal powers. And then, one fine day, the gamekeeper from Saffire- Sparkle School for Wizardry, Gridhag, told me the truth. I am a witch, and I am not truly Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford, but Lily Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford Potter."

"You mean. . ." whispered Harry.

"Yes," reaffirmed Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford.

"Mum!" shouted Harry joyously.

"No, Harry," said Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford patiently. "I'm your sister. Your long lost twin sister Lily Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford Potter."

~*~*~16 Years Earlier~*~*~

The nurse approached the red-haired woman lying on the bed, and her husband beside her. She smiled gently, clutching two infants in her arms. One was a little boy with a shock of messy black hair, bright green eyes, and thick- rimmed glasses. The other was a glowing child possessing sun-kissed ivory skin, curls of luxurious midnight, and eyes of changeable evergreen.

"Congratulations, Lily and James Potter." said the nurse. "Twins!"

"Oh," said Lily. "What shall we name them?"

James thought hard.

"How about. . .Harry and Lily Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford Potter?"

Lily nodded her agreement.

~*~*~16 Years Later~*~*~

"So, anyways," continued Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford, shaking her head of rippling ebony, "it was decided at birth that we had to be separated because I was destined to bring about Voldemort's downfall."

"B-but. . .I thought that was me!" Harry said, confused. Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford laughed her laugh of boundless sunlight. "Sorry, Harry. . .that one's up to me."

Ron looked triumphant. "Well, Harry, you can't date your own sister, so looks like Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford is all mine!"

Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford shook her head of shimmering licorice. "Sorry, Ron, but I'm already dating Sirius."

Ron glanced up at the staff table, where the bare-chested leather-pantsed Sirius was laughing and chatting with McGonagall. He caught Destinee Violette Morningstarr de Smytheford's bottomless viridian eyes and winked.

"Damn him!" shouted Ron, and then he ran from the Great Hall sobbing.