Hey, this doesn't need much explaining except that I wanted to try my hand in a one-shot. Hope you enjoy it and don't forget to give me feedback!
Read and enjoy,
Disclaimer: Honestly, people.
It was one of those things that just happen in college; a whole new world especially after the fact I never wanted to leave home in the first place. I was in a whole new arena; people were smarter than me, people were more talented than me and there were people who were amazing artists; something I've always yearned to be. I never wanted to leave my family and my home just to spend a year in a dorm with boys where we had to share bathrooms. And I had to have a roommate. I don't like to share that personal space. To me, my room was my sanctuary, my abode from the horrors and realizations of the outside world. And I had to now share this with someone who never meant anything to me, who wouldn't mean anything to me and that I never wanted to like in the first place.
I met Sango when we had our core class together freshman year. She was a beautiful, vibrant girl who stuck to her morals and obeyed her mother.
"I love what you said in class today…" she smiled.
"What part? The part where I asked why the snake was the only animal in the garden of Eden who could speak or the part where I asked if Adam and Eve had bellybuttons because it was pertinent to the discussion of whether women were equal in the eyes of the writers of the Old Testament?" I asked, briefly wondering what made me even speak to her, the cold hard truth being she was far happier than I was and she looked, well, nice; dressed nicely in some perfectly clean jeans and I glanced down and shrugged at my pajamas. I mean, I wasn't bad but I just didn't care at this point. Boys weren't on my priority list.
"Both!" Then she laughed and I knew right then that she had to be my friend. Anyone that laughs at your jokes is golden.
Sango was about the coolest girl I knew. I never met anyone who believed so forcefully in what they did and practiced day in and day out. She loved her parents endlessly and I was able to confess to her that I did as well. That was when we really starting hitting it off. We would go to lunch and dinner together, walk back from core and even watch TV together in her room, huddled around the small screen which was placed under her bed from lack of space. Everything was awesome.
Until HE came.
Sesshomaru was Sango's friend from the first day in to college. And with him—everything was a game; absolutely everything. First it was the fact that he had met her first and supposedly knew her better. Second it was the fact that they were both residing on the same floor of our house, I was on the first and they were both on the third. Thirdly it was the fact that he knew most of her quirks already and I was still learning about them. And the worst part was that it would be so offhand I would have to keep all my frustration inside so Sango wouldn't see how angry he made me.
"I was talking to Heime last night…" he would drawl, eyes sparkling towards me, goading me into an argument. Heime was Sango's mom. It didn't help both that Sesshomaru continually lied about things, and he got so good at it that there was a point when I didn't even know if he was serious or not. Half the time he would just do it to piss me off and I knew it. I could see it in his eyes.
"When I went to Israel, Sango, I could have sworn I talked to your Aunt…" or something along the lines of a downright lie.
"Sess, did you go to the party last night?" Sango would ask. His eyes would drift towards me.
"No, I was talking to your brother Kohaku. He told me about when you…"
And then there were times when he wouldn't have to lie.
"Sango, remember the time when we…" his eyes would just inevitably fall on mine as he and Sango laughed about some happy memory without me in it. And let's be honest, okay? I got a little into it as well. Core class was my time to make Sango laugh as much as possible so we could have little private jokes about anything. When there was a lull in conversation I would raise my eyes to Sesshomaru in triumph as I produced my trump card; Funny moments a la Kagome, without Sesshomaru—special note on the WITHOUT and the SESSHOMARU.
And it isn't even that I liked Sango or was jealous of their relationship (okay, maybe a little jealous, but I definitely didn't like Kagome in that woman to woman way). Sango was a friend, and I don't honestly know what Sesshomaru thought of her. But it was just the way he seemed to want to make it a competition between us, and being stubborn; I couldn't back down from a fight. We were in college and fighting over a friend like we were five again and boys and girls still had cooties.
But one night at dinner it came to a head. I had walked with my roommate to dinner because in my loneliness I succumbed to her crazy offer and just went with her. Sango hadn't called me and I called her getting no answer. They were serving nothing particularly noteworthy that night, per usual, but I took my time getting my food. I was hungry and I wanted to check over all my options. Looking around for Kagura, I found her at the table—with none other than, who do you think? Sango and…Sesshomaru. I literally almost snapped my tray in half I was holding it so tight. He had beaten me at the game. I sat down as pleasantly as I could; trying not to be too hurt that Sango obviously forgot me.
"Kagome, I'm so sorry. I don't know why I am such a mean person sometimes. I totally forgot to call you. I didn't mean it." I smiled at her, not being able to stay mad long.
"I was just going to remind you about the avocado and I was even going to remind you to invite…Sesshomaru since we forgot him at lunch today," I allowed myself some solace in that fact. Sesshomaru, however, was not to be bested and turned to me and drawled,
"She just likes me better." And that was all it took. I rose from my chair and glared over him from across the table.
"What did you say?" I said through gritted teeth.
"I said, she likes me better," he was standing now as well, pushing his plate aside.
"Oh it's on, my friend, it's on. It has just begun," I said menacingly, not noticing the look of confusion on Sango's face wash into subtle laughter.
"Oh is it now?" Sesshomaru glared at me, clenching his hands on the table edge, as if restraining himself from lunging at me to go in for the kill. And with that I picked up my uneaten food, no matter what my stomach was telling me, deposited the untouched tray on the runway for dish cleaning and left the dining hall. I wasn't retreating; I was simply giving myself time to have a new strategy.
It became an all out war that didn't even stop at trying to get Sango alone with one of us. I discreetly snuck into his room (his roommate let me in) and stole the squash his dad brought him to decorate his room with. I ritualistically threw them out the window of his bedroom, with the on looking horror of his roommate. He got me back by taking my wash out of the washing machine still wet and unclean and then deposited it on the floor of my room, leaving an almost puddle stain permanently in my carpet. I retaliated by taking every one of his antique "women of war" pictures (you know the ones where they are almost naked but they aren't because it was the Forties and people just didn't do that back then?) and burned them in the lounge fire while roasting marshmallows over them. He got revenge by taking my Edvard Munch "The Scream" poster and selling it to someone down his hall—where they displayed it in their room proudly and wouldn't give it back. I evened the score by taking his good snack store and ate them conspicuously in my room—even shared the stash with numerous people on my floor. Then he struck back the horror upon horrors. He went into my underwear drawer and draped my panties all around the house, where I had to go and find them later, highly embarrassed and pissed off. I still couldn't find my black lace ones that I had just in case the opportunity ever arose.
And the times when I was with Sango alone she constantly felt sad that she had left Sesshomaru out. One night we went into town to go to dinner and to pick up some necessities at the store. Sesshomaru wanted to come but he was finishing an essay and we said we would call him when we were ready to go to see if he was finished. Sango and I were on the bus when we both, yes, we both, remembered what exactly we had forgotten back at the dorm. Yes, Sango and I both forgot Sesshomaru. Now I was secretly thrilled to get time with her that I could potentially rub in his face, our mutual forgetfulness worked to my advantage. I even lent Sango my cell phone (her batteries were low) to call Sesshomaru and reveal the bad news. After the conversation was done, she seemed so sad that I had to feel a little guilty myself. I didn't mean to do it, it just happened. We had a crummy night out because we both felt guilty and I wasn't looking forward to being blamed for Sango forgetting. I only wanted to take the blame for something I did in all consciousness.
We brought Sess some candy and ice cream back from the restaurant and store so he would forgive "us." When he opened the door, the look of shock at my appearance was the first thing I noticed before he ushered me in. Sango immediately plopped down on the bed but I felt a little uncomfortable so I stood, watching him as he ate the ice cream with a look of almost ecstasy on his face.
"San, this is delicious. You know how much I love dessert!" He smiled as he brought another mouthful to his lips and licked the ice cream off the spoon. My eyes seemed to be riveted on his mouth until I heard Sango, the witch of all evil, speak.
"Oh, it was Kag's idea. She felt so bad that you couldn't be with us. She was mope-y all evening." She giggled at her little "cleverness" as I shot her a death glare. The ice cream had NOT been my idea, although I did help her pick out the candy…and perhaps paid for it. I felt BAD, alright! And I was mope-y because I felt guilty. I am all for level playing fields and he was supposed to be there!
Sesshomaru brought his cool gaze to me, all warmth and smiles he reserved for Sango gone.
"Oh did she now?" I felt like I could detect something else in his voice other than shock and disbelief but I was probably being delusional. Guilt was just not a fun emotion. Sango looked over at me.
"Oh well, you know what? I have to go finish my reading for core but I'll see you guys later, okay?" and without a second glance she left Sesshomaru and me alone in his room—alone, alone alone. Well. Trying to make a fast exit out of his room I just about had the door open when he closed it fiercely and spun me around. All pretenses were gone. His eyes were alight with something akin to fire and I knew it was most likely anger.
"What do you want from me?" He practically whispered, as if anything louder would have physically harmed him.
What did I want from him? What does he mean? Aren't we playing the same game here, the same funny ha ha game about who is the better friend? Is he asking why we are even playing this petty game in the first place? Because I know that answer! Jerk, trying to make himself seem not guilty in this situation when it's ALL HIS FAULT! I WANT MY UNDERWEAR BACK!
"Why don't you ask yourself?" I said as I walked out of the room, unable to understand the nerve of that man. Honestly, he is just so damn arrogant and pompous. To think that I WANTED something from him; the idea was completely ludicrous. However, when I fell asleep that night to the gentle snoring of my roommate I thought back on that night at dinner. It just wasn't…the same when he wasn't there. It wasn't…well, fun. Because if I was honest with myself it was fun to compete with him, it was fun to know that at the end of the school day, at the end of all the stress and insanity that is college…there was something to look forward to.
The year passed uneventfully after that little incident but our little game didn't tone down a bit. So far he had three letters sent home informing his parents about his "drug problem" and was missing seven of his fifteen new "women of war" posters: I had discovered the fun of making him predict which one was next. I had lost more underwear, a bra not returned this time (what was his fetish for this? Did he know how much it pissed me off?); and he in turn ate my food stash which was infinitely larger than his being I had a smaller meal plan than he did.
Sango would mention to me time to time about what happened between us, something offhand about Sesshomaru's posters or my food. She wouldn't accuse anyone outright, but the glint in her eye seemed to show all; she knew what was going on, a little bit, if not in intimate detail.
It then came time for summer vacation and I was strangely heavy hearted to leave the dorm, this place that I had made my home and experienced my first taste of freedom without the restraints of true adulthood. I would miss my friends and the people on my floor and house became my family, almost. My roommate and I left on not so nice terms; I promised myself to never room with anyone again if my life depended on it. Sango's and Sesshomaru's plans were along the same lines, although their roommates weren't quite as "special" as mine was. I hugged Sango goodbye, promising to call her about the trip we planned to Hawaii that summer. Sesshomaru stood off to the side and I nodded briefly to him before getting in the car—he would be coming as well.
The summer went well enough but I found myself missing the antics of freshman year with a passion that bordered on obsession. I found myself memorizing the layout of Sesshomaru's room, pondering and processing anything else I could possibly do to him the next year, wanting to be prepared to start anew at the new school year's beginning. However, we still had Hawaii first.
"It's absolutely gorgeous here!" Sango cried while she sat sunbathing and basking in the warmth of a tropical sun. I was clad in a bathing suit as well, although I was trying not to get sun burnt for my summer job as a lifeguard already accomplished a tan for me. Sesshomaru was sitting under an umbrella, looking unnaturally pale and uncomfortable clad in dress slacks and a white polo shirt. In college he wore more casual outfits but if I thought back correctly, he never looked like he just rolled out of bed and then found his clothes on the floor. He was always…nice looking. However, why he deemed Hawaii necessary for slacks and polo weather would be beyond me.
We had an interesting greeting, Sesshomaru seeming for aloof then ever and I wanted to start our old tricks anew. It felt a little sinful doing it behind Sango's back, like some secret affair, even though this was far from anything sexual. Heh, anything sexual between Sesshomaru and I would definitely be a sin.
The week passed by without anything of note happening, we climbed a volcano, went shopping and Sesshomaru was still the same cold fish as he started from the beginning. I wanted to yell at him or be mean to him or even stomp my foot at him, as long as it got a reaction. It was NOT fun being alone in this one-sided game. I wanted to play!
One night when I was sneaking into his room to filch his bathroom bag (you know, filled with all the things men found necessary when traveling? I don't know what this would entail, but I was taking it anyways) I saw Sango returning to her room, exiting from Sesshomaru's room. I didn't know what to say; at all. I never knew what Sesshomaru felt for Sango and yet perhaps, deep down, subconsciously I did. I must have known that he felt something for her even though she seemed to only think of friendship for him; but obviously not anymore. It seemed as if Sesshomaru had won the game…
Strangely I felt a little saddened at the prospect that Sesshomaru and Sango we're now an item. And it wasn't because Sesshomaru won and that he got to have Sango more now. It was that Sango got to have him. It wasn't that I felt betrayed by him—I felt betrayed by her. With all those subtle hints I would have thought that Sango would have gotten that I am desperately in love with Sesshomaru and I have no idea what to do about it. No frickin idea.
And then my little "problem" with Sango eluded me after that night. Now I was angry at one person and one person only: Sesshomaru. It was his fault I was in love with him in the first place. I became so bitchy it became vulgar.
"San, I'm going to go—"
"Jack off on the toilet?" I continued "reading" my magazine.
"No I was just going to—"
"Bang your gay lover?"
"I was going to—"
"Cum all over your face?"
"Screw your mom?"
"THAT'S IT!" Our heads, mine and Sesshomaru's that is, swiveled towards the direction of an extremely pissed off Sango. She was absolutely livid. "I am sick of this crap! Come here!" She took both our hands and pulled us up to our suite. There was a lounge and two bedrooms that connected by a bathroom. She pushed us into the bathroom and locked the two room doors, trapping us in the toilet room together. Yelling through the door she said, "And you're staying in there until you both tell each other how you feel!" And with that I heard her leave.
I turned my face towards the small window to avoid Sesshomaru and to allow myself to blush profusely. How did she know what I felt…for him? And who did she even think she was that I was going to be the one to admit anything to that…wanker!
We sat in silence for about two hours, neither of us wanting to be the first one to crack under the pressure and start a conversation. During that time I had painted my nails, decided it was a bad color and removed it and put another polish on, decided that the mauve color theme in the bathroom didn't suit me so I redecorated it in my mind—black and red, since it suited my current mood at the moment, with lots of instruments of medieval torture strewn about the room. I also decided that if the window was bigger I would push said person out of it and then pretend it was an accident. I was about to try the doorknob for about the umpteenth time when I felt his hand pound against the door, much like he did that night not so long ago. I turned around to face him but he stopped me with a harsh glare.
"What do you want from me?" He yelled and I almost didn't register anything but the tone of his voice.
"What do I want from you? I could never want anything from you! You are a pompous, arrogant prick who takes everything too far!" I railed, going back to that night when he confronted me, too angry to think straight.
"I take things too far, Miss. Declare War on Me? What do you want from me, honestly, what are you expecting to achieve?"
"I don't want anything. I just thought we had a merry war betwixt us but you had to go and take it to another level!"
"What are you ranting on about?" His voice got steadily louder, drawing me closer to him with the arm around my waist.
"I am talking about you, you bloody prat! And how you and Sango were together last night!" There, I said it. I said what was really bothering me. Nice going, Kagome. His face instantly cleared of emotion but his tone became softer.
"What do you mean?"
"I saw her leave your room last night. I know what has been going on behind my back…and I thought…I thought we…" I let it drop there pathetically, allowing Sesshomaru to think whatever he wanted about I was going to say. I was just suddenly very tired and upset.
And Sesshomaru was laughing. The prick was laughing—at me.
"Don't laugh at me!"
"Oh you stupid woman; don't you know I love you?"
"I'm not a stupi—" My jaw completely dropped. What did he say?
"I missed you so much over the summer," he said while hugging me close, "You made me feel…so, carefree. Sango was just there last night because she knew how I've felt you for about a couple months now." He leaned down, cupping my cheek and pressing my body closer to his. I could almost feel his breath on my lips when—
"Wait, I don't have my black lace underwear on!" I yelled because I was still so nervous and shocked, making me feel amazingly stupid at the moment. We were in a bloody bathroom for goodness sake! He didn't answer as he smiled down at me and closed the gap between our lips.
"That isn't a problem…" he said while he produced keys from his pocket and opened the adjoining door to his room. He led me into his room, and I played the part of "dumbfounded and trying not to be angry" so well it should have won an academy award. I suddenly didn't like Sango very much anymore.
"So this was a trick!" I fumed, ready to deck him and use instruments of medieval torture to vent my rage.
"You're a smart girl, Kagome." And then he did something even more outrageous. After fishing around in his bag for a minute he produced my long lost black panties, a huge grin on his face. He waved them around my head and I didn't even want to know what possessed him to keep them. No matter if he loved me or not. Forget medieval torture, I wanted to use my hands to kill him.
"You're lucky I love you or you would be dead by now!" I yelled, pouncing on him and toppling us to the floor. He was about to kiss me again when—
"Are you done yet?" Sango yelled, pounding through the door and you would have to be an idiot to not hear the laughter in her voice. All this because of a simple merry war…
"No, we're not done yet," Sesshomaru said through the door while smiling at me and then he pulled me into his embrace, kissing me once more.