[Hoooo, boy... Here we go... I thought I'd never write an R rated.

WARNING: Crack use, alcohol, Tsukasa strippage and Subaru being bashed beyond your wildest dreams!!



Disclaimer: If I owned .Hack//SIGN, Subaru would have long since died, Tsukasa would be a guy and Sora would parade around shirtless. Do you see any shirtless Sora? No. Therefore, I don't own .Hack//SIGN. ]



Tsukasa stripping, Sora on crack and Bear flirting? Oh My...


Tsukasa's mind was clouded. He struggled to stay foucused but couldn't. Suddenly the world was a blur. The same thing was happening to all of our heroes and Sora who were currently using two new items in The World. Crack and alcohol. The creators of The World didn't call it that. The items were just nameless ones that had been floating around and Sora got a lot of.

*5 minutes after the substances were consumed*

"WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" The said whoop of joy came from Subaru who was singing Police Magic on karaoke. All of the characters are currently eithier drunk, high or both. In Subaru's case, both. Swinging her hand down on her hip she slurred the next chorus. "It's tha POLEESH MAGIC, if you wanna nee me!!.." Mimiru threw a bottle of what we know as vodka at the Axemaster. A war ensued when Subaru countered the attack by throwing her axe at Mimiru

Inside of everyone, there are tiny invisible threads that tie us to one another. The threads are powered by something the person posesses or acts like. The thread for Subaru to Tsukasa was severed when Subaru's axe flew off stage and proceeded to hurting Mimiru severly.

Or atleast that was Tsukasa's figuring.

"FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!," the wavemaster screamed as he jumped up and fell off the small table he had been sitting on. "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!!! I AM FREE FROM SUBARU!!!!!!!!!! WHEEEEEHEEEHEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAYEAH!!!!!" Having said this and with Subaru offstage, Tsukasa jumped up on the table and sang Platinum Blonde Life while stripping himself nude. Sora began cheering the albino on and once the underwear was off all eyes were on Tsukasa.

Mimiru effectively broke the ice by screaming "OMFG!!!! HE HAS BOTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" In truth, Mimiru was imagining this. Tsukasa was a boy in The World so that's what he had. Tsukasa, however smiled proudly and sat back at his table, with his clothes scattered all over the stage.

No one wanted to elaborate.


Sora had been watching everthing but found the idea of being more active very enticing. Hence, why he was on his third blunt of thee hour, picking up Tsukasa's clothes. Humming to himself lightly, he proceeded into a full blown song. Maha smiled and was also high. Starting to pick up the beat, the NPC danced wildly with Crim to the song of the PKer.

This song has made a mark in all of us. If you have never seen .Hack//SIGN, you might have never heard this glorious melody which still plauges this authoress in her sleep. My dearest readers, incase you are brain dead, you know the song I'm talking about.


And Sora managed to get this song totally and completely wrong.


Bear looked over at BT and began to contemplate the true meaning of her name. 'Bacon Tomato? Bondage Time? [1] Only one way to find out...,' he mentally mused before sitting opposite of the blonde wavemaster. "Sooooooo, come here often, good lookin'??"

He didn't even get that far. He got punched in the face during the second drawn out syllable. "Keep yo' hands offa my woh-man, dog turd![2]," a twin blade howled. Thus a fight began between Bear and A20. Guess who won? If the fact the Bear has a broken arm in The World is any form of a hint, then use that.


[ [1]= The authoress has a bad, scary mind...

[2]= Inuyasha anyone?????

And do NOT ask about the thing with A20 and BT. Just remember, they are high and drunk. Tell me if I should add to this insanity.]