Blood Feud

By: Karine

Rating: R

Disclaimer: I ain't owning them, I'm only hiding them ^_~

Summary: Sirius Black always knew he wasn't like the rest of his "dark" family, and at Hogwarts, he's hoping to find his place and be able to be himself. But nothing is like what he expected it to be, because no one can see past his name, so he, instead, turns to a solution that could bring him eternal peace….

Chapter One


The Black Sheep


Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, the place where every young wizard long to go, especially Sirius Black. For Sirius Black, that school didn't meant learning magic, curses and hexes, it was more then that. For him it was a place where he could be himself, a place where his parents would not have a total control over his life and circle of friends. Because if the Black were renown to be a dark family who hated "mudblood" and loved the dark arts, young Sirius was the total opposite of that.

He knew from the start that he wasn't like nearly everyone else in his family, because he always questioned what his parents were trying to teach him, everything they told him about how "pureblood" are above all else and that muggles were below them. Sirius never believed that, it never sound right to him, but he never told his parents that, because he had painfully realized that voicing an opinion that went against what his parents were telling him was not acceptable.

That was the reason he couldn't wait to go to Hogwarts, a place were he could truly "live", without having to follow what his mother called the "Black Ethic". There, he hoped he would meet peoples like him, who like Quidditch and pranks like he did, but he never would have thought it would be like it turned out to be, he never thought it would become Hell on earth…

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*


Everything had relatively went fine in the train bringing him to Hogwarts, he had carefully avoided his "friends", the one his parents had allowed him to have. Those "friends" were all git and bound to go to Slytherin in Sirius' opinion. But then again, he too was bound to go there, since after all, a Black that didn't go to Slytherin was considered an anomaly. But Sirius didn't want to go there! He just knew that it wouldn't be the right house for him, and he could only hope that he wouldn't end up there.

When the Hogwarts Express finally reached its destination, the first years were all led to the lake by a half-giant named Hagrid. "Here is someone that my parents wouldn't want me to befriend." Sirius said snorting to himself, all the while making a mental note to get to know him since he sounded fun. He didn't have time to muse over that, since soon enough they had reached the lake and were asked to embark in one of the many boats.

No troubles arose during the crossing and soon the first years were setting foot in a place that would change their lives.

Sirius' nervousness had grew as he made his way into the halls of the wizard's school, but it reached its peak when he heard his name said by the Deputy Headmistress of Hogwarts.

The distance between where he stood and the stool wasn't big, not more then ten feet perhaps, but for a young boy who had all sort of thought whirling through his mind, the distance did seemed great indeed.

When Sirius finally reached the stool, he shakily sat on it, careful not to make it fall on the ground, because he didn't fancy being laugh at on his first day by the whole school.

The moment of truth came as Professor McGonagall moved to put the hat on his head. Sirius braced himself, a small part of him half expecting the hat to yell "SLYTHERIN" before it was fully upon him. He breathed a sigh of relief when it didn't, and instead it rested softly upon his hair, sliding down a little into his eyes.

"My my, this is quite an easy choice to make young Black."

"It is?" Sirius asked, his voice dripping with deception.

"Yes it is young one. I can see what the others are not. Great qualities you posses, none of them belonging to your bloodline though. You're courageous, brave, bold, trustworthy, loyal. But, most importantly, I can see that you will find great friends soon, all of whom you'll be fiercely protective of. Considering all those fact, there is no other place I could put you except… "

"GRYFFONDOR"

Sirius nearly had a heart attack when he heard the sorting hat's choice and he happily jump down of the stool. He quickly lost his happiness at being sorted into Gryffindor when he saw that everyone at that table, no, "everyone at every table" he mentally corrected himself, was glaring at him. No cheering came from his table as he made his way to it, and he had to admit that he was extremely disappointed in that. "That's probably because they didn't expect a Black to end up in Gryffindor" He thought.

Now, if only he would have been just that….

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Sirius ran out of Gryffindor's tower, nearly causing two students who were entering it to fall over, and headed for the school's courtyard.

He couldn't take it anymore, every one was giving him the cold shoulder, those who weren't were worse though, because they were only mean to him. The worse one as far as Gryffindor was concerned was James Potter, but that wasn't really a surprise to Sirius, considering that Potter's father was head of the Aurors' division at the Ministry of Magic.

Sirius had heard a lot about the Potter's family, not in good term mind you, since this family was renowned to hate dark magic and "dark" family, family like the Blacks. So Sirius could understand that James wasn't exactly being his greatest fan. But couldn't he, coming from a family that, unlike his own, had no prejudice toward muggles and bloodline, see that Sirius wasn't like his ancestors, like his parents?

But it seemed that it wasn't going to go that way, or so Sirius learned the hard way when from day one James began to make Sirius feel as miserable as he could. Going from insulting him every time he saw him to trying to make him trip each time they crossed path.

But, there was some that were acting worse then James, way worse, Severus Snape of Slytherin, along with his twins' cousins, Julian and Jason Dethfort.

Those three were what would some called "true" Slytherin, and since his birth, Sirius had been forced by his parents to be friends with them, since as long as they were concerned, those three were the perfect friends for their son.

Ever since Sirius had been sorted into Gryffindor, they considered him a "traitor" and they began, just like James did, to make his life miserable. But, they did it the Slytherin's way, which meant that it was always without the teachers standing a chance of knowing they had done something and it was always meaner and hurt a lot more then anything James could have thought about.

And their latest deed could mean the end of the Heir of the Black Family.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*


It all began like every other time when Snape and the Dethforts encounter Sirius in the hallway. Lot of cursing, swearing and insults, all for Black, who usually stood his ground and listened to them. But this time, Snape decided to go a little bit further and threw a hex at the unsuspecting Gryffindor. The said curse was meant to cause a small amount of pain, and then cause the receiver to fall unconscious, and it was headed straight for Sirius, or so he thought. But, fate always loves to twist situation and that one was no exceptions.

It turn out that Remus Lupin, one of James Potter's friend, was coming their way and got straight into the hex's path. He screamed out in pain then collapsed.

Sirius, being a loyal Gryffindor despite everything, immediately took out his own wand and pointed it at…nothing! It seemed that as soon as they saw that the spell hit someone else, they left, or maybe it was the running footsteps that could be heard that prompted them into action Sirius will never know.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*


"YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO LIVE"

Whether it was those words spoken in the heat of the argument between James Potter and Sirius Black, or the one before them, no one remember but Sirius fled, tears pouring down his face.

This said argument had started when James had arrived after hearing his friend yell of pain, and the sight that greeted him made him lost it. He didn't stop to ask what had happened, why Sirius had his wand out and why Remus was unconscious. Instead he took for granted that Sirius was the cause and he pushed him away from Remus.

Sirius tried to explain what had happened to James, but the latter would have none of it, he simply stood over his fallen friend and yelled every insults and curses at his fellow Gryffindor, which ended in the one, said above.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*


James was fuming, how dare a fellow Gryffindor attack one of his own, Black no less. He was going to make him pay, oh he would.

James was torn out of his revenges' thought when he heard Remus' voice.

"What have you done James?" The boy asked, sad deception emanating from his voice.

"What do you mean what have I done???" James snapped. In the heat of the argument, James hadn't noticed that Remus had been awake.

"You didn't listen to him, I did and I saw first hand what happened James, Sirius had nothing to do with that. It seem the curse wasn't strong enough to render me unconscious for long after all, because when I woke up, Sirius had took his wand out and was about to point it a Snape, who cast the first hex, to avenge me, not to hex me. But you didn't stop and asked what happen did you?"

James mouth fell open and he stared wide eyes at his friend, but when he was about to reply, Remus immediately cut him.

"You of all people should know that one's bloodline definite a person. That he there was probably a good reason for Sirius to be cast into Gryffindor even though he's from a dark family. You've been nothing but horrible to him ever since you first saw him and yet, he was ready to defend your friend, like a Gryffindor would do. "

It took a moment for James to finally let the word sink in, but when they did, they came with the worse feeling of guilt he ever felt.

"Shit" Was the only thing he could manage to say before burying his head into his hands.

"I guess I should go apologize now should I?" He asked in a little muffled voice.

"Help me up before would you?" Remus asked then was obliged as a hand was extent toward him.

Remus dusted himself and straightens his robes before answering.

"Yes you should my friend, and I'm going with you, to ensure that you actually do apologize." He said looking suspiciously at James, who grinned sheepishly in return.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Sirius ran, as fast as he could, in the Hogwarts' empty hallways, the events of the last minutes replaying in his head. He was so deep in thought that he nearly collided with Snape who stood right in the middle of the hallway, obviously waiting for Sirius' arrival.

"Aww, the reject's crying. What happened? It's hard to be abandoned by everyone even our own isn't it cry baby?" Snape sneered.

Sirius didn't answer; just glare as fiercely as he could from where he stood.

"Do you get it now, you don't belong ANYWHERE, no one want you, not even your own mother!" Snape said in the same tone while Sirius' eyes widened in surprise.

"Your mom didn't wrote to you didn't she? I guess she's still looking for the right way to express how you disgust her and how you are a shame to your family…"

That did it; Sirius lunched at Snape and punched him right on the nose, before taking off again, leaving a seething and bleeding Snape behind.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*


Sirius ran to his room and was about to throw himself on his bed when he noticed that the family's black owl was already in it, a letter attached to its leg. He extended a shaky hand toward it and snatched it off of the owl's leg.

He quickly skimmed through it, and let it drop on the ground when he reached the end. "That could…She wouldn't…She can't mean…" He told himself, but the hard truth hit him. No one really wanted him.

He took an old piece of parchment and scribbles something on it.

"They do not understand me, nor are they trying to, either by cruelness or lack of trying, but I don't blame them, for I do not understand myself. Maybe they were right all along; maybe I really don't belong anywhere. My differences are excluding me from being in Slytherin and my blood makes me an anomaly in the great house of Gryffindor. If I don't belong in Hogwarts, and my family doesn't want anything to do with me anymore, then I don't belong at all, so there is only one way out. Death."

He put that note on his night table, and took out his pocket knife in his drawer. He then crash to the ground, his back leaning against the wall, and brought the knife upon his wrist.

"Let the Black blood flow from my veins." He muttered before bringing the knife down on his other wrist.

It hurt, a lot, but Sirius didn't care, this was it, this was the end of his suffering and no matter how excruciating it felt, he would now be free. Before his strength left him, he wrote two words with his blood, two words that had so many meanings.

"I'm Sorry"

Then he embraced the darkness that crept his way in and fell unconscious.

And it was right at this moment that James came through the door…

TBC

A/N: Thanks to Trin who yet again made sense of my typing and a special mention to Kasumi who helped me find the title of this chapter :D.