This story does take place in the third season, but, it takes place the way I saw things. This is two months after the explosion..

I don't own em.

Shalimar lurked through Sanctuary. She moved slowly, aimlessly. It was 3 AM and for the fifth night in a row, she found it impossible to sleep. As she wandered past Emma's room, she paused. That door had not been opened since the day they laid Emma's memory to rest and carved her name in Stormking Mountain. She lingered by the sealed door for a couple of minutes, took a deep breath, released a deep sigh, and continued on her endless plight. She knocked on Brennan's door but got no answer. She used her feral sensitive hearing to detect his breathing; she heard none. Shalimar gently knocked on Brennan's door and pushed it open. She was slightly relieved but somewhat dismayed that she found the room empty. 'At least he didn't die too,' Shalimar thought to herself. She backed slowly from the room and proceeded towards the lab. As she approached the lab, she heard some noise coming from the dojo. As she rounded the corner she saw Jesse. He was fighting a hologram and for some reason, getting his ass kicked. Shalimar knew that Jesse had been doing this lately. He had gotten into the habit of turning off the safety and turning the skill level up to 9. The holograms couldn't hurt him, though, not really. But, for some reason, this seemed particularly real. As Jesse hit the floor and phased to miss a club-like blow from the hologram, Shalimar yelled for the system to end the program. The hologram disappeared before she could look back up and Jesse lay breathing hard, flat on his back on the floor.

She approached Jesse in the dojo. "Hey! What's up?" she asked as she sat down on the floor next to him.

"Why did you turn it off? I was just getting the upper hand," Jesse said through his breath as he sat up and took the towel that Shalimar offered. "Those new holograms that Adam was working on are too real. You can actually feel them."

"Yeah right," Shalimar quipped. Jesse looked into her eyes as she did this and thought he saw a smile. He hadn't seen her smile ever since .

"Hey, Jesse, have you seen Brennan? He's not in his room and." Shalimar asked.

"Yeah," Jesse replied. "I sent him out about an hour ago. He should be checking in soon."

"Not again, Jesse," Shalimar signed. "You have to stop this."

"No, Shal. This time seemed more concrete than the last. The signal was stronger this time!" Jesse explained.

"Jesse, listen to me. It has been two months since she died. She's gone, Jesse and so is Adam, you have to face that eventually."

Jesse got up and proceeded down the stairs of the dojo refusing to listen to Shalimar. She followed and talked. "Jesse, don't you think I miss them too?" Jesse could hear the whimper in her voice and he turned to meet her. He caught her arms and pulled her closely.

"Shal, I really do not think they are dead. Come on, do you feel that Emma is gone?" Shalimar turned and shook her head. She hated it when Jesse did this. "Shal, do you? Because I don't. I still feel her Shal! Don't you?"

Shalimar looked up at him and whispered, "Yes."

"Now look, they took her body away so fast, Shal. And when we tried to claim it, they wouldn't let us. Hell, they wouldn't even let us see it!"

"I know, Jesse, but maybe her parents."

"Her parents!" Jesse exclaimed while letting go of her and proceeding to the lab. "Shal, her parents didn't even know where she was, let alone be able to claim her body. They probably don't even know that she's dead."

"Where did you send Brennan this time, Jesse?"

Brennan was passing by a gas station when he heard Jesse come over the comlink. "Yeah, Jesse."

"Brennan, have you found anything?" Jesse depended so much on Brennan the past few months. He was like a brother to him. Brennan also had been willing to do anything for Jesse. He knew that Jesse had been hurting since the explosion. He missed Emma. Jesse and her had been starting a relationship and Brennan knew that not only did he lost her to the explosion, but he lost Adam. Adam had been more of a dad to Jesse than his own had and now, he lost them both. Brennan didn't feel particular sorrow at the loss - he felt guilt. He was angry. He didn't make it to acceptance yet and sadness on the grief ladder. Brennan never got past anger. He never had been able to.

"No, Jesse, sorry man."

"I was so sure this time!" Jesse exclaimed as he leaned on the computer and slammed his fists on it. Shalimar rubbed Jesse's back. "I'm so sorry sweetie," she comforted.

"Hey Jesse," Brennan came in over the comlink. "I think I'm gonna stay out awhile, man, OK?" Brennan pulled his car into the parking lot to the bar where he first met Emma. Brennan had been coming here a lot lately.

Jesse didn't answer. He just walked away and headed for his room. He left Shalimar standing in the lab with her head down and her hands on her hips.

Lexa was standing in the entrance in the dark, just out of sight. She'd watched the whole thing.