What?! Unauthorized sidestory AGAIN?! Gomen nasai, Lola Apple. I was browsing through some books in National Bookstore and was inspired to write another story based on your work (kunwari, nde nmin finals).

Here we go:

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Once in a while, a great man stands tall and proud above and ahead a thousand men…and the 999 others below and behind their respective women.

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For My Sons

A syao-chan 11:45 pm brainstorm

To my twin sons,

I wrote this letter right after I watched you and your mother sleep. It was almost dawn, the day you two were born, which coincidentally, is the same day you two celebrate your birthday every year.

Ah, I had promised myself that I'll give you this letter when the right time comes, maybe before one of you decides to settle down. What I will state here is very important, since this is about marriage. A bond that is sacred, because you make a covenant with God to love and take care of this special someone whom you'll spend the rest of your life with. Just like what I did when I brought your mother to the altar and swore to love her with every little piece of affection in my heart.

Marriage is about commitment. It's about being true and steadfast, especially with promises. If you promised your wife that you will wash the dishes, do it, if you don't want your next dinner served to you in your pet dog's bowl.

If you go home and find no one in there, go to the mirror and start saying over and over "I was wrong" until you can say that in public. Then work on "I'm sorry". Children, marriage is about humility. When you know you are wrong, the only right thing to do is to seek humbly for her forgiveness. Now if you are right…just shut up.

And when you marry, keep in mind the word "acceptance". If your wife tends to go crazy during those one-day midnight sales, and in the process, victimize you by demanding that you accompany her to the mall. Why, just accept it wholeheartedly. I did. I have learned to mark those mall days in my calendar and prepare lots of caffeine beverages like pop soda in cans and instant coffee in the car in preparation for these events. I have applied for more advanced work-outs and aerobics training in your Uncle Ren's gym to help myself survive in those nights that your mother turns into a ferocious animal preying mercilessly on bargain clothes and a miscellany of accessories.

In addition, look at me, children. I do not run your mother's life because I respect the fact that she wants to live her own life. I do not run my own life either. Anyway, the bottom line is, do not try to boss her around; marriage life is a game of chess, and she's the Queen. Live with it.

You must understand also that marriage is give and take. You give, and she takes. And let her take everything she wants, trust me, it's not worth the fight, trust me.

But the most important thing to remember is that marriage is not sacrifice; it never is. You don't give up something you cherish for that. In fact, you end up having more things to cherish and be thankful of. When you do these things I mentioned above, you don't think it's sacrifice. You do it because it makes you happy seeing her happy.

My friends all asked one universal question when I married your mother. "Why her?" they asked. I only had answer to that: because I love her. I don't need any other reason but that. I don't mind being called a henpecked husband nor do I desire to have the same freedom your uncles have. I had enough of those things, and the excitement of being single and free can never compare to the feeling of security and belongingness your wife gives you. I know they'll understand that in due time, yes, even your Uncle Ren. He had a headstart in fact, when he caught the garter. But that's beside the point.

Children, you remind me of myself and my aniki. Different as day and night, but I know the bond between you two is unbreakable. I hope it grows as strong as the one your Uncle Hao and I share.

I think that's all your weary otoosan had to say. I wish you all the best in life and love. Remember not to fret too much about life's troubles. Everything will work itself out. Just be happy.

With lots of love,

Daddy Yoh

End

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St. Peter, hoping to make his name rollcall on departed male souls to be easier, placed two lines- one for men who had been dominated all their lives, and the other for men who dominated all their lives. The line for the former was so long that it extended even farther than the saint imagined. But there was a man who was standing in front of the other sign all by himself. The saint went to him.

"Good sir, do you realize that you're the only one standing here?" said the saint proudly, pointing to the sign.

The man blinked the grinned sheepishly. "I-I am? Gee… I never realized that. My wife just told me to stand here."

The lost beatitude:

Blessed are the henpecked hubbies, for they are wise, and they will live longer than any other male species in the world.