Chapter 15: Fearless Little Wolf
By: DEVILZ CHIK
I know this story has not been updated for so long but here it is! This is the final chapter – I hope you enjoy it. I should say that I loved the attention that I got from this story; I love all my reviewers and please review my other stories as well!
I don't own CCS.
September 15, 2006
Yes, she loves Syaoran and at least, he somehow knows it now.
It still feels different because he's not there.
She won't even be able to talk to him for who knows how long. She doesn't even know when he will get back.
She knows he will come back, of course. After all, he's the only one who bothered to keep his words to her.
But she still can't stop herself from crying.
It was like as if Syaoran was worth all her tears. And if that's really the case, she can cry forever.
But she didn't have a chance to cry forever because just the next day, she discovered that she had no more tears to cry.
Afterwards, Kinomoto Sakura became numb. Her heart was broken into many pieces, hopeless to be pasted back together again. It was stupid really how things happened so quickly.
Whatever the girl does anyway, Syaoran Li would forever be in her mind, as the person who bothered to keep his promises to her. And as the person that she had become close to loving very, very much.
Sakura's Point of View
It was a Saturday, my only free day from my very busy college life. I promised Tomoyo that I would pick her up so we could go together at the opening of Joseph's café. The café was not really Joseph's. It belonged to his whole family, but I guess when he is ready to handle things, it will be his own café eventually.
Excited to see Joseph again, since the last time I saw him was one year ago during the dance competition on our senior year, I drove my car to Tomoyo's apartment as quickly as I could.
On the way to her place, I didn't care of the memories that might come back to me when I see Joseph again during his last visit here. I groaned inwardly as the orange light became red just as I reached the intersection.
The stupid Li Syaoran. It had been just a year, yes, but to me, he would forever be a stranger from now on. I would not know what he looks like, for sure. I had erased his image from my mind after he left.
As I waited for the green light, I glanced at the people crossing the pedestrian lane. I saw a guy with chocolate brown hair. I smirked to myself, watching him walk. You see, that might be Li Syaoran, back in Japan, but I will never know because I will never want to know for sure. The light turned into green so I sped up to Tomoyo's.
I parked my car neatly in front of her building and cautiously walked towards the elevator, afraid that I might bump into Eriol. He always had news about Syaoran and as much as I would want to hear them, I preferred not to because I knew that it would just be updates on how his engagement is going.
Oh, yes, Li Syaoran was finally engaged.
Besides, Eriol was smart enough not to mention his name in front of me. They rather just let me be and I really appreciated that from them. I wanted the matter to be left alone. We were never together anyway.
I knocked on my best friend's door, forgetting her key back in my car. "Wait a minute!" Tomoyo's voice could be heard from the inside.
She opened the door a minute later. "You're early!" she told me as she let me inside.
I just smiled and shrugged and settled on the couch. I waited for her to get dressed. "I want to be there early. Maybe we can get Joseph alone."
Tomoyo walked out of her room. She was almost ready; she was just putting on her belt. "Or maybe you just want to apologize quickly for not keeping in touch in hopes that you might get a free coffee."
I laughed at her response. "You know me too well, Tomoyo," I said.
As soon as she was ready, we went to my car and drove off to Joseph's café. As always, Tomoyo was deciding what to play during our fifteen-minute ride and it took her five minutes to be contented on one CD.
It was an unusually quiet ride and I knew by then that she was hiding something from me. I could tell that she wanted to tell me something and was having a battle with herself, whether or not to tell me now or later.
"He didn't know he was going to be engaged, you know," Tomoyo suddenly blurted out and it was evident that I was surprised as I quickly stepped on the brakes when the lights went red. The sudden stop caused our heads to go forward and back again.
"Who? Joseph?" I asked, totally confused as to why my best friend would say something so random. "Joseph is engaged now?"
"No, Sakura!" she said, angry at my denseness. "Li. He didn't know he was going to be engaged."
"I told you this before, Tomoyo," I trailed off, shifting the gear to neutral and letting my left leg stepping on the clutch pedal rest for a while. "I don't care if he's engaged."
Tomoyo chose not to reply after that. Then after a few minutes, the conversation was forgotten. My best friend was back to her chirpy self, babbling about how ready she was to film a short documentary of Joseph's family's café opening.
We reached the café on time. There were many people waiting outside the door. The ribbon in front of the door was red and I laughed inside my head how cheesy and cliché this all was.
We began searching for the man of the day and soon, we found him sitting on a bench near the sidewalk located at the other side of the street where their café was. Why was he there?
"Sakura, Tomoyo!" he exclaimed as he saw us approaching him. He stood up to give us a big hug at the same time and geez, did he almost choke us.
Finally, he let go. "You've missed us that much?" Tomoyo teased, sitting down on his left side as I settled down on his right.
"Hey, buddy, I guess you've learned your lesson," I said. "Never go far away from us."
"And not be able to say: I miss you guys very, very, very, very much?" he asked credulously. "And I'm not the one who hadn't kept in touch."
Tomoyo coughed at this and I looked away guiltily. "I've been busy!" my voice was suddenly higher.
They laughed at this. I still needed to learn how to lie.
Tomoyo was busy walking around recording the event while I made myself comfortable on one of the high tables of the café. I did get my free coffee from Joseph and that was the reason behind the unfading smile on my face.
I loved seeing old friends that I have not seen for a very long time. And in Joseph's case, I had felt the same thing towards him twice. I entirely loved catching up and reminiscing.
But maybe not now. As I watched Joseph trying desperately to get away from some of his family members, I knew Syaoran's name would come up sooner or later. I had to admit that I was still not ready for it.
And I didn't even know why.
I groaned inwardly for the fiftieth time. I suddenly felt very confused. Why now? Why today? Why does Syaoran keep popping in my mind? Somehow though, I knew that the answer lies deep within my mind. The answer had successfully found a very good hiding place and I had given up playing hide-and-seek with it.
Finally, Joseph had escaped from his curious uncles and aunts and made his way towards me.
"Are you bored?" he asked me, sitting down on the chair beside me.
"Not really," I replied. "I like watching people so I'm okay."
He nodded casually and for a moment, he seemed distracted. "Sakura," he paused. "I have something to tell you and I know that you're probably going to be mad at me but that's ok because I know that you can't stay mad forever." He paused again, as if in thought. "Yeah, you can't stay mad forever so maybe you won't really get mad at me…"
When he talks a lot like this, he knew that he was in trouble. But what could he have done that he would worry so much about me being mad at him? He had only been here in Japan for a week.
His parents had arrived sooner to start building the café but he just arrived… so what could it possibly be?
I knew that Joseph's babbles last a lifetime so I decided to interrupt him.
"Joseph, just spill it. What is this about? You forgot to get me something from Hong Kong?"
He looked at me straight in the eyes then took a deep breath. "Actually," he began, now looking away. "I brought something for you from Hong Kong."
Hearing this, I became excited and was waiting for my gift. Don't blame me, I love presents! Beaming, I asked, "Where is it?"
"Wait here," he told me then he walked off towards the kitchen of the café. I went back to my coffee and started thinking what Joseph would give me.
It better be chocolates.
But it was not chocolates because he was empty-handed when he came back. When he tapped my shoulder, I turned back to face him but my eyes did not settle on Joseph but the person behind him.
I wished I was dreaming but I knew I wasn't. It was too real.
Maybe Joseph noticed how surprised and speechless I became so he decided to speak up, "This is what I brought for you from Hong Kong," Joseph said quietly.
I said nothing. I was merely staring at Li Syaoran.
"I thought you have chocolates for me," I whispered dumbly and I knew Joseph heard because he let out a smile.
"I do," he replied and I beamed once again, forgetting that Li was in the same place as I was. "But I'll give them to you later. I think you guys need to catch up on a lot of things."
Before I could even object, Joseph dashed towards his cousins and started playing with them. I knew he was just pretending to be busy so that I would not dare go to him. How much I hate him right now, leaving me with the most despicable man on earth.
I looked at Li again then huffed. I had no intentions of talking to him right here and now so I am going out of this place.
He probably didn't catch my drift because he was following me to the parking area. Before opening my car door, I growled and glared at him.
It was then that I had a very good look on him and I chuckled despite of all the hatred and confusion I was feeling at that moment. He was the guy I saw earlier this morning crossing the pedestrian lane.
One of the many odd things that happen in one person's life everyday.
He arched one of his eyebrows at me, probably wondering why I was giggling.
"I saw you earlier," I began explaining, fiddling with the keys in my hand. "I just didn't know that it was really you. It's been a long time." I paused. "You, asshole."
I was gritting my teeth now, controlling my temper as best as I could. You see, I would have been crying right now but as was mentioned before, my eyes ran out of tears. They were all worth nothing. This guy was worth nothing to me.
I saw Li's expression change. I probably hurt his feelings, which was good. Maybe it was payback time.
"You know what, I pictured this moment many times," I said. "You and me – seeing each other again. And I keep thinking what you can possibly say to me. So c'mon, impress me."
He took his time opening his mouth to speak. I decided to wait for his reply and while doing so, I took my time to see how much he's changed.
He didn't really change, on the contrary. And well, I had actually forgotten how he exactly looked like a year ago. His brown hair was still the same; his eyes were the same, holding so much emotion right now but I could not tell what those are. Maybe he grew an inch or so. I could not really be certain.
I was so busy assessing his features that I did not notice him take a step towards me.
"I love you," he said so softly that it was barely audible. I was not even sure if I heard him right or if my ears were deceiving me but his voice was so sincere. I felt my heart skipped a beat and as a reflex, I blinked my eyes, just to make sure that he would not disappear right there and then.
"You're engaged," I muttered. "And why did you come back here?"
"I told you I'll go back, right? Just keeping my promise," his smirk was so evident on his face.
Oh god, my knees were staring to feel like jelly.
"You came back here for what, exactly?" my voice was starting to shake and falter a bit.
This part had not been part of my thinking process whenever I think about this moment!
"To invite us to your wedding party?" I spat. "Well, if that's the case," I paused and in a second, I flashed a smile at him. "I'm sorry, Li. My schedule is so hectic. Your wedding party will not be able to fit in my schedule."
I could not take any of this anymore so I decided to open my car door and get in. Li didn't even bother to stop me or anything so I put my gear into reverse and sped way from the parking lot.
I didn't dare to look back at him. Driving back home, I wondered if that would have gone better.
My room's ceiling seemed to be the most interesting thing in the planet right now as I had been staring at it for who knows how long. Tomoyo had called earlier but I didn't answer. I would just have to call her later.
For the meantime, I shall begin my thinking process. I need to keep my mind working properly again because after seeing Li, my mind had been temporarily closed for business.
He did say 'I love you' but was that all he could say? Yes, he sounded sincere — so sincere. It had been a year and I couldn't even decide if I still have the same feelings for him.
Wait, slash that. I was not even sure in the first place if I really did love him.
I covered my face with my pillow and groaned.
Sakura Kinomoto, you are in denial.
Of course you love that guy! You wasted tears for him.
He remains at the back of your head and heart.
It is time to play hide-and-seek again.
It was 4 in the afternoon. I decided it was time to call Tomoyo. I would not be surprised if she knows about Li's arrival here in Japan. She did bring him up earlier this day.
After 3 rings, Tomoyo picked up. "Hello?" she greeted.
"Hey Tomoyo," I said weakly. "Sorry I didn't answer a while ago."
"It's ok," Tomoyo replied. There was a long pause afterwards which never happened before in any of our conversations. "Sakura, I have to confess something to you—"
I knew what was coming, really, so I finished it up for her. "I know that you know that Syaoran's arriving today or well, that he's in Japan, maybe."
Another pause. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you," she said. "It's just… I figured that Li should show himself to you by himself."
"Well, he did. But I guess he needed a little help from Joseph."
"How did it go?"
She didn't sound pushy but her curiosity is very clear.
"I don't know if I could have handled it better or not," I sounded very, very perplexed. "He told me he loves me though."
There was a sudden shriek from the other line.
"Tomoyo, he's engaged, remember?"
"Maybe he's not anymore," she told me thoughtfully.
"And so what if he's not? What's supposed to happen now, Tomoyo?"
"That's a really hard question, Sakura. But I don't think you should be asking me."
I groaned once again. "Just let things happen," Tomoyo said. "See how everything goes from here."
See how everything goes from here. Tomoyo's words were running through my mind until I finally fell asleep. What was supposed to happen now really?
Li is back in Japan with a very mysterious reason.
I had a dream a week after he left for Hong Kong. I dreamt that Li came back and asked me to marry him. We got married. It was a very nice 'happily ever after' ending. I woke up all happy and hopeful. I did not tell Tomoyo about it, afraid that it might not come true. But something worse happened. On that same day when my dream was very fresh in my mind, I received the news that Li was engaged.
I didn't even know the girl's name. All I know was that she was probably Chinese. Yes, I had an idea that it was definitely an arranged engagement.
But it would have been so romantic if he had hijacked a plane and returned to me.
Syaoran's Point of View
'I love you' was all I could say to her, really. As soon as I saw her, how pretty she still was, I ran out of words. I could not admit that I practiced any speech for her when I got back here, but I didn't know it was going to be this difficult.
Winning her back was my goal.
But where to start? Where to start?
I knew where her apartment was; I could go there. She might not open the door for me though, so slash that. I knew where her college was; I could go there. She might just ignore me in the hallways though.
Grrr, as much as I want to deny it, this was getting so frustrating and I was becoming so desperate.
I wanted her back. I promised her that I would make her fall in love with me again when I get back. I'm here, but yet I never had the chance to do something for her. Except to say that I still love her.
My engagement was off two weeks ago and that was when I decided to finally return to Japan. I did not have my mother's permission at all. It took me a week to convince the pilot of our private jet to bring me to Japan.
Joseph saved me. With the help of his father, their family borrowed our private jet so he could get here in Japan as soon as possible. My mother could not say no. On the night of his flight, I sneaked in and now I'm here.
The opening of Joseph's café went great. After Sakura left the café, I went back inside, meeting Tomoyo for the first time after a year. She was holding her video camera and she was not even surprised to see me.
"Did Sakura leave?" she asked me. So no polite 'how are you's'?
I just nodded and walked away from her. She knew I was coming – probably heard it from Eriol. I met up with the rest of my friends yesterday and it had been great seeing them again.
Hearing from them that Sakura had not dated since I left lifted my hopes up but right now, all my hopes were crushed. She called me an asshole!
I knew I am acting very childish but what the hell!
"Hey, Joseph," I called out when I see him about to enter the kitchen. "Can I borrow your car?"
He flashed a smile and searched his pockets for his keys. He threw it at me and I caught it. "Good luck, man," was all he said then after that, I dashed to his car and was driving to Sakura's apartment.
Sakura's Point of View
Yet again, my room's ceiling seemed to be the most interesting thing in the world. I was lying on my bed, still pondering on what Tomoyo said.
See how everything goes from here.
How did it all start anyway? As if on cue, flashbacks appeared in my mind. The part of my brain responsible for keeping all the memories I had with Syaoran was activated and I could not help but to smile because hey,
I won the hide-and-seek game.
A very nice feeling erupted in my heart although it was beating very, very fast right at this moment. I could feel my muscles relax while I was still had my very big grin on my face. I suddenly became very giddy and jumped out of my bed.
Afterwards, I was grabbing my jacket and was running to the door. Still smiling, I could still feel my heart beating very, very fast. It was as if it was being summoned by someone. I didn't know where to find him.
Where to start? Where to start? Then, I opened the door.
I bumped my head into something awkward and when I looked up, I smiled seeing it was Syaoran's hand.
Feeling very stupid at the moment, I stepped back and recomposed myself. I think I stopped smiling but I knew I was still smiling inside.
He followed me.
Staring up at him, I waited for him to say something. He settled his hands inside his pockets and shrugged slightly before speaking.
"I know you don't really want to talk to me right now," he began. "But I'm here now and there's nothing you can do to make me leave – I'm staying here forever if that's what it takes for you to really know that I'm still in love with you and that will never change."
He paused and I took my time taking it all in. I didn't even know what to say. Did I have to say something?
"You're engaged," I muttered, remembering the issue. I could not have someone else's fiancé. I would not stoop that low even though I really love this guy.
"I called it off," he replied. "My mother forced me to do that."
His mother. Yet, another problem. Would he be willing to be involved in a forbidden relationship? His mother told me to leave him alone before. As much as I tried to do just that, one way or another, we would still end up near each other, anyway.
"Does she know you're even here?" I asked, worry evident on my face.
He shook his head.
"But don't worry," he said, assuring. "She will understand."
"She didn't understand your sisters' engagements," I pointed out.
"She actually did," he said, with a smile. "After a while."
I then noticed that we were still standing outside. Should I invite him in? Naaah, stay out here.
I scratched my head in confusion and frustration. "Why are you here exactly?" I demanded.
He slowly took my right hand in between his palms. I blushed at this, feeling his warmth. "I want to be with you," he said softly, his amber eyes looking straight at me. "I love you."
Tears were starting to well up in my eyes for no reason at all. All I know was that I am extremely blissful right now. This was too good to be true.
"Please, tell me you love me, too," he pleaded, yet again, softly.
I smirked, pulling my hand away from him. "And what if I don't?" I teased.
"I know you do, anyway," he took a step towards me and that was all it took him to close off the distance between us. He placed his right hand on my left cheek. And then there was uncertainty in his eyes. He lifted his hand a little. "Right?"
I merely nodded, smiled and hugged him tightly.
And I knew that was where I belong. In his arms.
They were two strangers, hiding under the shadows of denial and confusion at the beginning.
After the embrace of acceptance, they were destined to love each other fearlessly.
Author's Notes: I honestly do not remember what I have planned for the ending so here it is. My spirit is really crushed right now so it will really make me feel better if you review and tell me if you like it or not. Yes, it has been rushed and I apologize for that.
Watch out for my other stories, by the way! Thanks for all the support!
xoxo DEVILZ CHIK xoxo